When I went to college, it was far less expensive than now, but much of the increases in costs are inflation results. Tuition at a NYS University College was $400 per semester, you had to live on campus the first year, $1500 per semester including three meals daily when school was in session. I had two scholarships, the State University Scholarship of $200 per semester, every student received by applying for it. $200 per semester from State Regents Fund which every student who received passing grades on the annual High School Regents exams was entitled. That covered tuition. My mother had save about $4k from my earnings of jobs I had since I was 12 through the end of High School, from delivering newspapers, working at a local supermarket, doing grounds work at a mental hospital for two summer, all kinds of odd jobs when I could get them. I had a hockey scholarship of $500 per year for the first year, getting kicked off the team at the end of season for fighting, I was the only American on the team of Canadians who very much resented my presence, and being better than most of them. Lost that scholarship. The first year I borrowed $1k to cover books, supplies, warm clothing I didn't have for the frigid north, and incidentals. Things were much less expensive than today, but people earned less as well. The second year I moved off campus to share a $75 per month apartment with 4 other students, we fed ourselves and saved a bundle of money. I worked every part time and odd job I could find. Working 4 weeks in the spring when the bean boats unloaded at the Nestle plant in Fulton NY, getting paid $1 for each 100 lb bag of beans unloaded. Walking up and down a 12" wide gang plank, over frigid water, so cold that if a loader fell in and couldn't get out of the water in 3 minutes he would end up disabled, 5 minutes and he was dead. I earned about $3k for 4 weeks of 14 hour days. I worked part time at gravel crushing quarry, monitoring the crusher ball for tear in the rope cables, if a chain or cable snapped, whipped up, it could rip me in half, $3 per hour hazard pay. Even the other workers, thought I was crazy for taking the job.
My third year, I opened with 3 partners a natural food store and a jeans store, each of us investing $1,500 of student loans. We lived in the back of the stores, eating the food we were selling, wearing the clothes we were selling. Furniture came from a Good Will Store, and a Salvation Army Store, with exception of what we found in trash before collections, and made ourselves. By midyear we started promoting rock and pop shows throughout the region, doing fairly well thanks to the counter culture. My fourth year I paid off all my student loans by midyear, finishing undergraduate work with cash in my pockets. That summer, I earned a scholarship to participate in a graduate program at Nottingham University, went for six weeks, then backpacked hosteling around Europe. Returning, I finished graduate school in 18 months, earning an MFA, while continuing to operate our businesses, expand them, making more money, and then enlisted, an obligation of service to my nation, at which time I sold most of my business interests to my partners. Gave mom about $10k before I shipped overseas. She needed that money, as my father was declining in health. She still had to feed my younger brother and sister.
I don't know that I could do that today. Costs of living are much more expensive, less leeway. Jobs not so easy to find, even for the strong and willing. That Nestle plant is closed, the quarry closed, professionals in college towns run the small businesses, especially the college bars. The bar we owned, costing us $375 in an estate sale, having an older teacher (23) front for the beer and wine license, now that would cost $tens of thousands, rent would be 20 times what we paid, and we never considered liability insurance. Rock and pop shows are now strictly in the hands of professionals, and the costs are astronomical. We never had to consider security an issue. It was plain fun for all, not that there weren't minor incidents, but they were few, easily handled.
My kids were fortunate. Dad was wealthy enough to pick up the entire tab for each of their higher educations, including medical school for my oldest boy. And I did the same for nephews and nieces who needed the assistance. None graduated in debt. All served their country of their own volition, one way or another, before entering the private sector. Without I, or their mother saying a word, they knew how fortunate we all were, and never stopped thanking us with their own achievements and families. They knew the world owed them nothing, and each applied themselves as best they could, taking little for granted other than parental lover and concern. As kids, they each worked jobs, sometimes with me, my wife or other relatives, or contacts they made on their own, by their own choices. continued
It's ok from grandparents to do some spoiling. Not parents.