A wife attempts to publicly shame her successful husband into minimum wage tasks

[SMTA]

One of the main rules in my house is that dirty laundry is not shared online. Period. What happens at Casa de Superfly, stays at Casa de Superfly.

Family business stays in the family. Period.

 

[SDET]

So you only think wealthy men shouldn't do menial labor, bu wealthy women should?

Why is that?

As long as the woman is wealthy by her own devices, she probably shouldn't. Do you really think Gloria Allred does her own dishes and laundry?

 

[Winchester]

So you don't think it's rude to toss a towel two feet from the basket? If I do 4 loads of laundry every week, washing, drying, folding, and putting away - is it too much to ask to just make sure that wet towels don't land on carpet?

To me, that is not petty. It's extremely inconsiderate towards the person trying to keep the house clean.

I wasn't referring to your situation specifically Super, but to a more general male fault of putting dirty laundry in the "proper" place. Now to your question is it inconsiderate to your significant other if it bugs them, sure. That being said I am absolutely horrible and I mean really bad about putting my dirty laundry in the hamper. Does asking me to please pick up my clothes get me to permanently change my bad habits, nope, I'd be good for a week and then fall into my old bad habits. I even bought a hamper to put 2 feet from where I undress, do I use it, sure every couple of days when the dirty laundry pile on the floor gets out of hand. Does it bug my wife, sure but not nearly as much as it used to. Has she learned to just let that one go, yeah... we're both happier for it. :2razz:

 

[Winchester]

So basically you want a slug who will do nothing but keep a clean house and be your "beck and call" girl.

As I said before, you don't need a wife. You need a call girl and a maid.

They'd be the cheaper option for him in the long run.

 

[TheGoverness]

So you only think wealthy men shouldn't do menial labor, bu wealthy women should?

Why is that?

'Cuz womenz need to say in da kitchen!

 

[Superfly]

As long as the woman is wealthy by her own devices, she probably shouldn't. Do you really think Gloria Allred does her own dishes and laundry?

Do you really think Gloria Allred would put up with a man telling her to do it?

I think she might put his balls in an empty Pine-Sol bottle if he tried.

 

[SMTA]

As long as the woman is wealthy by her own devices, she probably shouldn't. Do you really think Gloria Allred does her own dishes and laundry?

And you really think that she doesn't?

 

[Bodi]

In this case the dad doesn't sound like he does much... but then again we only hear her side of the story. We don't know anything about either of them.

Some people are just weak. Some people are just whiners.

 

[nota bene]

A man doesn't need most women; he only needs one. There are plenty of ambitionless women who will stay home and be taken care of in exchange for a few chores. A high school dropout can clean and take care of kids.

And provide sex on demand too. You left that out.

 

[RAMOSS]

Family business stays in the family. Period.

Particualrly if you are a Gambino or a Gotti

 

[Checkerboard Strangler]

Ours is not the typical division of labor because it isn't possible for it to be.
She can drive, she can go shopping, she's able to cook (in fact, really WELL!) and she can do laundry etc.
But except for driving and rolling around the supermarket there are certain aspects of all the other chores where she NEEDS help.
She cannot REACH all the different implements and utensils that she needs when cooking, someone has to get them for her.
She can't always cut or chop specific ingredients because she doesn't have the fine motor control in her left hand that she used to have.
She can chop up tomatoes or cucumbers but cutting up raw chicken is a challenge. She can't peel potatoes...well...she CAN but it takes her forever.
She can make dough all damn day but putting icing on a cake is pretty tough.
She can load the washing machine but getting the wet clothes out and into the dryer is tough.
And she can't vacuum worth a damn, try doing that from a power chair sometime.
And I insist on helping her get certain stuff out of the oven, because I don't need her to get a third degree burn on her legs.

A lot of this bullcrap about "successful men" not having to help with household division of labor goes out the window when it's a relationship between an able bodied person and someone with a disability.
And besides, if the guy's so successful, and he wants to whine about helping out, he should call a maid service.

Tell you what, I love that special smile I see on my wife's face when we're doing stuff together.
She's a "fun date" no matter what we're doing, even if it's just sharing the laundry chores.

 

[Superfly]

Ours is not the typical division of labor because it isn't possible for it to be.
She can drive, she can go shopping, she's able to cook (in fact, really WELL!) and she can do laundry etc.
But except for driving and rolling around the supermarket there are certain aspects of all the other chores where she NEEDS help.
She cannot REACH all the different implements and utensils that she needs when cooking, someone has to get them for her.
She can't always cut or chop specific ingredients because she doesn't have the fine motor control in her left hand that she used to have.
She can chop up tomatoes or cucumbers but cutting up raw chicken is a challenge. She can't peel potatoes...well...she CAN but it takes her forever.
She can make dough all damn day but putting icing on a cake is pretty tough.
She can load the washing machine but getting the wet clothes out and into the dryer is tough.
And she can't vacuum worth a damn, try doing that from a power chair sometime.
And I insist on helping her get certain stuff out of the oven, because I don't need her to get a third degree burn on her legs.

A lot of this bullcrap about "successful men" not having to help with household division of labor goes out the window when it's a relationship between an able bodied person and someone with a disability.
And besides, if the guy's so successful, and he wants to whine about helping out, he should call a maid service.

Tell you what, I love that special smile I see on my wife's face when we're doing stuff together.
She's a "fun date" no matter what we're doing, even if it's just sharing the laundry chores.

Man I tell ya'. You sound like a hell of a guy. Your wife is a lucky woman. You should tell her I said as much, but I'm pretty sure she already knows.

 

[Checkerboard Strangler]

Man I tell ya'. You sound like a hell of a guy. Your wife is a lucky woman. You should tell her I said as much, but I'm pretty sure she already knows.

LOL, thanks but it wasn't an attempt to post "inspiration porn"...I was already head over heels with her back in 1984 when she was still walking, dancing, ice skating and then later, wrenching on diesel engines as a Navy engineman.

As fate would have it, she was headed in one direction and I was headed in the opposite direction (geographically) but we finally did wind up together years later. I'm not one helluva guy, I just love hanging out with the wifey, she's fun, she's funny and of course, even if she can't walk, she does still have some damn fine looking legs anyway.

Believe me, after twenty years together, I'm no prize anymore haha.
Well okay, maybe I still have a wee bit of the old charm.
Or maybe she just hasn't gotten new glasses yet.

 

[nota bene]

So you don't think it's rude to toss a towel two feet from the basket? If I do 4 loads of laundry every week, washing, drying, folding, and putting away - is it too much to ask to just make sure that wet towels don't land on carpet?

To me, that is not petty. It's extremely inconsiderate towards the person trying to keep the house clean.

Yes, it's disrespectful to toss a towel on the floor when there is a hamper or basket right there.

 

[nota bene]

My answer to the question is this: It's wrong to badger men into doing menial work when they are contributing 100K+ to the household. It's a surefire way to get a man to prepay the kids educations so there's no money left to snag, then get kicked to the curb when the kids turn 18.

You've already said that any illiterate can wash dishes or raise kids and that there are plenty of women to be kept in exchange for these few "chores." Rearing a child is more than a chore; it's a responsibility that includes providing for his or her education. Perhaps that will include college, but the real work is in teaching the child the value and joy of learning. This is the priceless effort.

So far what I've learned from your posts here are that sharing in domestic responsibilities is a distraction from a breadwinner building a career. Women wanting everything to be equal is “predatory.” If a man earns more money, he’s working “harder and/or smarter.” But help should be paid for by the woman, and she may not do it if her “career doesn’t bring in enough money to hire help” or she insists on driving a luxury car.

I've also learned from your posts that men are “blinded by vagina!” And if a child is born, a man is likely to lose all his free will, so men must be “aware of the risks and mitigate them at every turn," so I'm guessing that men should beware the magic vagina.

It’s true that an illiterate can wash dishes, but it’s also true that a Ph.D. can. You seem to have a disdain for "menial" work, and I guess my problem is in regarding household chores or dishwashing jobs as "menial." I do a lot of work around my house but don't see the tasks as "lowly or degrading." They're just necessary work. Why do you see these as "menial"?

 

[Superfly]

LOL, thanks but it wasn't an attempt to post "inspiration porn"...I was already head over heels with her back in 1984 when she was still walking, dancing, ice skating and then later, wrenching on diesel engines as a Navy engineman.

As fate would have it, she was headed in one direction and I was headed in the opposite direction (geographically) but we finally did wind up together years later. I'm not one helluva guy, I just love hanging out with the wifey, she's fun, she's funny and of course, even if she can't walk, she does still have some damn fine looking legs anyway.

Believe me, after twenty years together, I'm no prize anymore haha.
Well okay, maybe I still have a wee bit of the old charm.
Or maybe she just hasn't gotten new glasses yet.

Methinks he doth protest too much.

 

[Superfly]

You've already said that any illiterate can wash dishes or raise kids and that there are plenty of women to be kept in exchange for these few "chores." Rearing a child is more than a chore; it's a responsibility that includes providing for his or her education. Perhaps that will include college, but the real work is in teaching the child the value and joy of learning. This is the priceless effort.

So far what I've learned from your posts here are that sharing in domestic responsibilities is a distraction from a breadwinner building a career. Women wanting everything to be equal is “predatory.” If a man earns more money, he’s working “harder and/or smarter.” But help should be paid for by the woman, and she may not do it if her “career doesn’t bring in enough money to hire help” or she insists on driving a luxury car.

I've also learned from your posts that men are “blinded by vagina!” And if a child is born, a man is likely to lose all his free will, so men must be “aware of the risks and mitigate them at every turn," so I'm guessing that men should beware the magic vagina.

It’s true that an illiterate can wash dishes, but it’s also true that a Ph.D. can. You seem to have a disdain for "menial" work, and I guess my problem is in regarding household chores or dishwashing jobs as "menial." I do a lot of work around my house but don't see the tasks as "lowly or degrading." They're just necessary work. Why do you see these as "menial"?

He wouldn't see them as menial for you. You are a woman.

 

[nota bene]

He wouldn't see them as menial for you. You are a woman.

True dat. And a cheerful little giver too.

 

[Superfly]

True dat. And a cheerful little giver too.

:lol:

 

[Bodi]

Towels need cleaning? :shock:

We worked it out in our house. I don't like the way she cooks so I do all the cooking/grocery shopping. She doesn't like the way I clean bathrooms or do laundry so she does those. :lol:

You do pre-eating she does post-eating...

 

[Checkerboard Strangler]

Sounds to me like a huge segment of "angry white men" are now the "Arrested Development" wing of the Republican Party and they need to grow the **** up.

 

[roguenuke]

Created yes; what they do with that creation, no. If a husband doesn't want to wash dishes, why should he be badgered into it?

Why should he expect his wife to do them? Regardless of how much money he makes, he uses those dishes to eat off of just like she does, and their children do. There is no reason she should be expected to always do dishes, especially if she works too, even if he makes more money.

 

[roguenuke]

Then I guess that the dishes sit there and mold until someone washes them or hires someone to wash them. It's the unstoppable force vs immovable object kind of thing.

Or they compromise, and they share doing the dishes or do them together, or work out an arrangement where one does the dishes (all or most of the time) while the other does some other "menial chore" instead. That's easily a legitimate compromise for many reasonable people within marriage.

 

[roguenuke]

There's another term for forced labor: slavery. My previous reply explains what happens if both the husband and wife dig in their heels and refuse to do dishes.

Or refuse to only do certain dishes or laundry, such as the spouse who is attempting to be stubborn about not doing such chores? Maybe not washing their cups or plates (and designating certain ones for each family member for a while to ensure that it happens)? Or refusing to wash clothes that the husband/wife needs for work? You act as if there aren't ways to force compromise when one family member is being unreasonable.

 

[roguenuke]

My answer to the question is this: It's wrong to badger men into doing menial work when they are contributing 100K+ to the household. It's a surefire way to get a man to prepay the kids educations so there's no money left to snag, then get kicked to the curb when the kids turn 18.

No it isn't wrong, especially if she is doing most of the other household work and working herself, regardless of how much money she is bringing in. Most of the time if the woman is working another job when the husband is working one making more than 100K, it is because the family needs more money. You'd be surprised how some people cannot live off of that much money without struggling at least to an extent.