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Women - What are you feelings about "giving away the milk for free".

CharisRose said:
You don't know me, just like I don't know you. So, I'm not your pal.

Roseann:)
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Pal, is a throwback slang term from the 1960s-1970s. It's a gender-neutral version of "dude".
 
I contrast Lurch's frustration with the first date with my wife. I explicitly told her if she didn't put out on the first date, there wouldn't be a second. Her reply was, fine, but it had better be at a nice hotel. Where she is from, that's kind of expected.

Interestingly enough, it works both ways. The chick I met just BEFORE my wife had relatives with nice properties and showed me a really good time including twice a day sex. She and I were together in Guaramiranga and Beach Park. However, she had too many characteristics that presented a high divorce risk, so I decided not to take her to the USA. She went psycho, calling me in the USA and sending worrisome emails.

HOTEL VALE DAS NUVENS - Prices & Reviews (Guaramiranga, Brazil) - TripAdvisor

Guaramiranga 2019: Best of Guaramiranga, Brazil Tourism - TripAdvisor

Beach Park (Aquiraz) - 2019 All You Need to Know BEFORE You Go (with Photos) - TripAdvisor
 
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SDET said:
I contrast Lurch's my frustration with the first date with my wife.
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If you stopped reading there, you're a smart mother****er.
 
Checkerboard Strangler said:
I do HAVE nose hair. Not happy with it either. I've suffered for my nose hair, lost women over it, bled for it, invested in obscure trimmers for it.
At long last I finally got it under control many years ago.

I've been told I kissed (or did other things) just like someone's ex-whatever when it WASN'T a good thing, or when it WAS a good thing. When it WASN'T a good thing, that pretty much killed my chances. When it WAS a good thing I just casually said something like "whatever floats your boat", but of course being a man as I am, I appreciate hearing that I did something or things "better than".

But in the end, whatever gets you through the night. ;)

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I've lived it. Not the nose hair, kudos on you tackling those bad boys!

I was in a long term relationship, going on 5 years, and suddenly she told me when I was answering the phone (her overhearing it mind you, not being on the other line) that she had finally realized I sounded like her dad. And dad was NOT a good topic by far. I kind of laugh now looking back at my trying to change my voice when I answered the phone just to avoid crappy feelings on her part. Life situations stepped in about 2 years later and it took us both different directions. years later we're still very close, but romantically on separate paths. And I still find myself listening to my voice when I answer the phone even though it never came up again after that day! :lamo
 
lurchadams said:
I'm 58 years old. I had a date Saturday night with a 53 year-old woman I've been communicating with for several months. Saturday was our third date - I took her to see, "Bohemian Rhapsody" at a movie theater that serves you drinks and dinner during the movie. It was pretty cool. But I just went off on a tangent.

So we get back to her place. She tells me her 2 kids that live with her are staying at a hotel overnight and would I like to come in. So I assumed at that point - her telling me her kids were gone - inviting me in - the fact it was our third date - I assumed she was inviting me in to spend the night.

So we're on her couch, we're talking for a bit, then I start to kiss her. She pulls back. I ask her how long it's been since she's been with someone. She tells me a very long time. I tell her not to worry, I'll take care of everything, then I gently take her hands and try to get her started towards her bedroom. She pulls back again and says, "No, I'm NOT READY!". I ask her, gently why she thinks that is. She tells me she "doesn't know me well enough". This woman and I have been talking for months. She knows my family - where I went to school. She knows who my friends are. We're facebook friends. In my opinion this woman knows me better than most women do when they first decide they want to have sex with a guy.

So the "not knowing me well enough" excuse was bull****.

I don't understand why this chick is even on a dating site if she has such a puritanical and unhealthy outlook on sex. She needs to get off the dating site and get into therapy for her anxiety about human intimacy in my opinion or her cycle of being disappointed and disappointing men is going to continue.

So my question is to the ladies:

It's been possibly years since you've been intimate with a guy. You're sitting on a couch with a guy you're obviously interested in. He wants to sleep with you. What in the world was this girl thinking? Why the **** is she even on a dating site?

Thanks.
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Why would you ASSume anything?? Maybe she just isn't that into you.
 
SDET said:
Accidentally added a wrong word. Fixed.
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Yeah, don't worry, the word wasn't a problem. But what I knew would be coming would be. I'll admit. Morbid curiosity got the best of me and, taking a peek, now I gotta shower.
 
lurchadams said:
I don't think so. The look of fear in her eyes as I was, "making my move" actually frightened ME. She should get off the dating site(s) and start talking to a therapist about her intimacy anxiety.
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The "look of fear" should have been a huge NO sign. Maybe you should talk to a therapist about your ASSumptions.
 
Checkerboard Strangler said:
I feel betrayed! Well anyway, you better get used to this, it explains EVERYTHING, and it is the reality.

View attachment 67250885
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^ Yeah, but not all women are born with all of those controls connected to anything. Find the ones that matter to the woman in question, and decide whether they are worth dealing with.

...meanwhile, she's making similar calculations... Just be honest. That goes a long way.
 
TheGoverness said:
**** that. Sexual intimacy is extremely important in a relationship, and I definitely wouldn't want to get married to someone before I've shared that kind of intimacy with them. I honestly don't see how anyone can even do that. Sexual compatibility is a pretty important part of a relationship, and it would suck to find out how much you don't click after getting married.
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How can I rec this post 500 times?:mrgreen:

If you don't devour each other in 1 or 2 tries, look elsewhere.
 
ecofarm said:
Yeah, don't worry, the word wasn't a problem. But what I knew would be coming would be. I'll admit. Morbid curiosity got the best of me and, taking a peek, now I gotta shower.
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That resort in the first link was awesome. Did you check out the place in the first link that the chick just prior to my wife took me?
 
lurchadams said:
You're as bad as the gov. You're attracted to the guy. You've known him for months. You invite him into your place. What are the chances, I guess that you're NOT going to jump this guy's bones?

Damn, you guys all circle the wagons around this person you don't even know, just because she's a woman.

Answer the question truthfully, my angry friend!
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Had you ever met her in person before??? Sounds like the chemistry just wasn't there.
 
SDET said:
That resort in the first link was awesome. Did you check out the place in the first link that the chick just prior to my wife took me?
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I tell you what. I'm gonna be nice. I'm gonna read your post and formulate a question for you.
 
SDET said:
I contrast Lurch's frustration with the first date with my wife. I explicitly told her if she didn't put out on the first date, there wouldn't be a second. Her reply was, fine, but it had better be at a nice hotel. Where she is from, that's kind of expected.

Interestingly enough, it works both ways. The chick I met just BEFORE my wife had relatives with nice properties and showed me a really good time including twice a day sex. She and I were together in Guaramiranga and Beach Park. However, she had too many characteristics that presented a high divorce risk, so I decided not to take her to the USA. She went psycho, calling me in the USA and sending worrisome emails.

HOTEL VALE DAS NUVENS - Prices & Reviews (Guaramiranga, Brazil) - TripAdvisor

Guaramiranga 2019: Best of Guaramiranga, Brazil Tourism - TripAdvisor

Beach Park (Aquiraz) - 2019 All You Need to Know BEFORE You Go (with Photos) - TripAdvisor
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Okay, now SDET thinks this is worth looking into, so I'm gonna check it out. Let me get this straight...

You meet a woman, first date, and you tell her she must **** immediately or go away. She says fine, as long as it's a nice hotel.

Now the question: How is that not a whore?

Bonus question: You think you were special?
 
lurchadams said:
God dammit, Gov! in my scenario, you're both single. Now I know you're just ****ing with me and you know I'm right about this woman.

I'm disappointed in the women here. They're doing nothing but attacking me and being intellectually dishonest. Not a good look for you guys at all.
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You're just trolling now, right??
 
lurchadams said:
ANSWER

THE

QUESTION

In the situation I described. Your both single. You've known the guy for months. You're alone. You haven't had sex for months, possibly years.

WOULD

YOU

JUMP

HIS

BONES?
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It's still a maybe.
 
ecofarm said:
Okay, now SDET thinks this is worth looking into, so I'm gonna check it out. Let me get this straight...

You meet a woman, first date, and you tell her she must **** immediately or go away. She says fine, as long as it's a nice hotel.

Now the question: How is that not a whore?

Bonus question: You think you were special?
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It doesn't matter! It works!
 
ecofarm said:
Okay, now SDET thinks this is worth looking into, so I'm gonna check it out. Let me get this straight...

You meet a woman, first date, and you tell her she must **** immediately or go away. She says fine, as long as it's a nice hotel.

Now the question: How is that not a whore?

Bonus question: You think you were special?
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Tbh I thought when he went into the "relatives property of prior"? I thought he called her and she said "sure baby, go use a fancy hut for getting your nuts off, here's the key".

But then it took a weird turn and I gave up.:2razz:
 
lurchadams said:
Then instead of pulling back when I tried to kiss her, why not just tell me that? I swear to God if she had said something like hey, my name, I am terrified of having sex with anyone because it's been years and I'd rather we just cuddle I SWEAR TO GOD I would have been fine with that. I would have appreciated her honesty, I'D ****ING CUDDLE WITH HER ALL NIGHT, CLOTHES ON if that's what she wanted.

The problem is she didn't communicate anything. She closed off. She's damaged goods, JMR.



Yeah, again. Communication? You know, people talking to one another and sharing their feelings? Have you heard of that? Sheri's incapable. I have no time for that, sorry.



She slowed NOTHING down. She terminated the encounter, full stop, with no explanation other than, "I don't know you well enough".



And I disagree with you, JMR. This woman I'm seeing, Melissa told me she things Sheri is a victim of society's pressure to feel "perfect" all the time. Today's advertising of cosmetics and such has made women feel inadequate. Makes a lot of sense, do you not agree?

Sheri needs help, JMR. She needs help or she's going to end back up on that couch with another guy and experience the same disappointment and shame.
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That you don't notice the irony of you discussing Sheri's problems with your other girlfriend is pretty central to the whole situation here. Maybe she doesn't know you well enough to know what her place in your particular lineup is???

Anyway, you asked for opinions, you've gotten many. Truly hope you find someone who is able to understand you and perhaps vice versa!
 
lurchadams said:
I absolutely disagree with you. If I'm about to have sex with someone for the first time, I have to know how much of a "driver" I have to be. Sheri telling me it had been "years" told me immediately I had to reassure her that I am capable of guiding her through everything since she's basically, again a virgin.

No, I disagree with you friend. That's important information for me to have.
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More honest emotion might work better than the planned attack. JMO
 
ecofarm said:
If your answers are the obvious, then okay. You do you. No judgement here.
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Miracles never cease. If more people would think outside the box, they would suffer less. The criticism here pales in comparison to what I got in from my own family when I started taking Latinas home. Some of deceased, but remembered parts of my family were Klansmen. Some of the chicks I took home were mulatta. You'd have thought the world came to an end.

It was amazing going from incel to getting attractive recent aliens to ride halfway across the country to meet my family in the Midwest. I haven't had to worry about frustration for over 30 years now.

Imagine the clash between a family that resembled "The Waltons" and this mentality (yes I know the music below is modern, but the mentality fits).

This is how a slum can be paradise: The title translates to "You go slut".

 
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