Here's the way I look at all this stuff:
I'm sixty-one years old, which means that I hit my prime at the height of the sexual revolution.
I never once felt like I ever had to force myself on anybody, and in fact, doing so was sort of a turnoff because the big "turn-ON" was if that "somebody" had some semblance of desire.
Puberty or not, hormones or not, it was a downer if the other person wasn't up for the fun, and it only exacerbated my youthful and naive misgivings about whether I even "knew what I was doing".
A cold reception felt to me like "I wasn't doing it right".
Did I ever resort to some clumsy forms of youthful manipulation or foolery to elicit a positive response?
Oh HELL yeah, sure I did.
Is that sexual assault? No, if only because more often than not, it didn't work.
On the rare occasions where it did, it was clear that whatever phony nonsense or baloney I had cooked up, the gal decided it was either goofy enough, amusing enough or maybe just an indication that I must have some inspiration, and I guess they thought it was good enough.
Did I ever ply my dates with alcohol or drugs to render them into a vulnerable state?
Nope, I was too much of a lightweight, so I was never a big drinker, and anything else was almost always a mutual activity, so more often than not the both of us might have been a little bit blinkered to some extent.
It wasn't my style to try the knockout punch of booze or some kind of dope to make my date blotto, because I wanted that desire, not a semi-conscious heap lying on the bed who wouldn't be aware or remember. Again, the big turn-OFF was the fact that a gal wasn't "turned-ON".
That would make it feel like "I'm doing it wrong", so it wasn't on my list of techniques, because chicks who are barely conscious don't act like they're anything but barely conscious.
As I grew older, I got all the one-night stands and the like out of my system, and I was seeking more substantial relationships. I can't say if I am an outlier, all I know is, for me, the sexual aspect started to be linked to more than just whether I could snag that gal for a night.
I was now more interested in snagging them long term, and forming a relationship also had the side benefit of making it possible to make the sex more satisfying, and after all, that was what I was after on the sexual side of things.
So, after all the above mumbling and rambling, I come at last to my point:
I realize that for some, they're just seeking an object to have power over, and for THOSE types, that IS their big "turn-on"...the power that they have OVER a woman is what they are after, not the fun of the sexual act itself. It's pretty clear that for the most part, those types of guys don't really give a **** if they know what they're doing in that department because for them it is the conquest and the power that floats their boat.
And that is pretty sad and pathetic.
Good sex is an art form, not a contest to see how many "kills" you rack up on your scoreboard.
It's a gourmet affair, not a competitive eating contest.
