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Describe this behavior and identify your age group[W:49]

Do you think the described action is? (age based)

  • (Age 35 below) Bad behavior, uncommon and inappropriate

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    45

AGENT J

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Question and your answer will be based on your age 35 and below or 36 and up

So you have class 3 days a week and sit with a person. You think they are a pretty ok person to talk to. They invite you to hang with their friends a few times and you go. So then on one of these outings, this person relizes they are attracted to you. they muster up the courage and they make a move, they lean in for a kiss. (nothing rough no grabbing no force they simply lean in for a kiss)

Do you think that actions is:

(Age 35 below) Normal, common and Appropriate as described
(Age 36 and up) Normal, common and Appropriate as described

(Age 35 below) Bad behavior, uncommon and inappropriate as described
(Age 36 and up) Bad behavior, uncommon and inappropriate as described


If you need more info to answer ask and ill give it.
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

Man, TheGoverness is going to be disappointed in our autistic screeching when she logs back on this afternoon...
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

It used to be fine if it was serious and the two people were serious about each other, but now the feminsts have gone and made it an illegal move.

"TO SAVE THE VICTIMS!"

I am not thrilled.
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

Man, TheGoverness is going to be disappointed in our autistic screeching when she logs back on this afternoon...

I doubt it governess seems pretty perceptive and level to me. She reads the other thread shell know im just curious to see if the majority (including her) have it wrong in that other thread.

Is making a move all of a sudden bad behavior and somethign only "oldtimers" do based on lack of respect for people . . . i dont see it that way at all . . buuuuuuut . . maybe im missing something maybe its just not here in the northeast states or its still a 20s and under thing that i may not know about.
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

Question and your answer will be based on your age 35 and below or 36 and up

So you have class 3 days a week and sit with a person. You think they are a pretty ok person to talk to. They invite you to hang with their friends a few times and you go. So then on one of these outings, this person relizes they are attracted to you. they muster up the courage and they make a move, they lean in for a kiss. (nothing rough no grabbing no force they simply lean in for a kiss)

Do you think that actions is:

(Age 35 below) Normal, common and Appropriate as described
(Age 36 and up) Normal, common and Appropriate as described

(Age 35 below) Bad behavior, uncommon and inappropriate as described
(Age 36 and up) Bad behavior, uncommon and inappropriate as described


If you need more info to answer ask and ill give it.

Dude... have some shame, will ya?
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

Dude... have some shame, will ya?

shame? what would i possible need shame about here? lol

im giving you the benefit of the doubt and seeing if me and the majority in that thread are wrong and you are right. Does it get anymore acknowledging about other possiblities than that? Im admitting i could be wrong and maybe what you say is true in places other than the northeast states.
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

I selected the second option. (Age 36 and up) Normal, common and Appropriate as described.

I would say the same were I under 35, simply because I've been in various positions to observe teenaged and young adult interactions after aged 35, at least prior to the last decade.

Personal experience and my subsequent observations of other's indicates that the onus (with few exceptions) is still on the male to make the first move.

Yet there is no school except the school of experience for a male to learn from.

Meanwhile, each girl simply assumes the male KNOWS (or should know) how to interpret her subtle clues as to what she wants and doesn't want.

IMO some young people today are buying into a lot of third wave feminist misinformation.

They seem to think love and attraction is something to be discussed in depth, as if preparing some kind of contract, before anything is expected to occur.

Yet you can't dictate love and attraction, what someone finds desirable or undesirable. People literally observe, make assumptions, then act hoping for the best.

Asserting that a male playing the role nature and nurture have dictated when trying to engage with a female is equivalent to sexual assault in every case when "permission is not asked first" is being disingenuous IMO.

Anyone else ever heard a girl say "If you have to ask, then the answer is no!" Think about it. :twocents:
 
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Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

Man, TheGoverness is going to be disappointed in our autistic screeching when she logs back on this afternoon...

Yeah, making this poll doesn't really seem cool to me.
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

Yeah, making this poll doesn't really seem cool to me.

This isn't even the only thread that's cropped up. The next to last one before this thread is also clearly spawned by that conversation.

Overall, it doesn't seem particularly worse than using her thread to fight over what is and is not acceptable flirting, but that's for OOP to decide.
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

I selected the second option. (Age 36 and up) Normal, common and Appropriate as described.

I would say the same were I under 35, simply because I've been in various positions to observe teenaged and young adult interactions after aged 35, at least prior to the last decade.

Personal experience and my subsequent observations of other's indicates that the onus (with few exceptions) is still on the male to make the first move.

Yet there is no school except the school of experience for a male to learn from.

Meanwhile, each girl simply assumes the male KNOWS (or should know) how to interpret her subtle clues as to what she wants and doesn't want.

IMO some young people today are buying into a lot of third wave feminist misinformation.

They seem to think love and attraction is something to be discussed in depth, as if preparing some kind of contract, before anything is expected to occur.

Yet you can't dictate love and attraction, what someone finds desirable or undesirable. People literally observe, make assumptions, then act hoping for the best.

Asserting that a male playing the role nature and nurture have dictated when trying to engage with a female is equivalent to sexual assault in every case when "permission is not asked first" is being disingenuous IMO.

Ya But a girl he has known for less than a week on day 7 or 8 on campus bending over and planting a kiss on her so fast that she does not reject the try BEFORE the lips reach HOME,,,,,,,no, that was pretty much never OK, and almost everyone understand that, and if they did not they just might have ended up beaned in the head with a heavy object.

Women, you see, knew the remedy.

Nope.... No. Longer. Allowed.
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

I selected the second option. (Age 36 and up) Normal, common and Appropriate as described.

I would say the same were I under 35, simply because I've been in various positions to observe teenaged and young adult interactions after aged 35, at least prior to the last decade.

Personal experience and my subsequent observations of other's indicates that the onus (with few exceptions) is still on the male to make the first move.

Yet there is no school except the school of experience for a male to learn from.

Meanwhile, each girl simply assumes the male KNOWS (or should know) how to interpret her subtle clues as to what she wants and doesn't want.

IMO some young people today are buying into a lot of third wave feminist misinformation.

They seem to think love and attraction is something to be discussed in depth, as if preparing some kind of contract, before anything is expected to occur.

Yet you can't dictate love and attraction, what someone finds desirable or undesirable. People literally observe, make assumptions, then act hoping for the best.

Asserting that a male playing the role nature and nurture have dictated when trying to engage with a female is equivalent to sexual assault in every case when "permission is not asked first" is being disingenuous IMO.

I agree with most of what you said. Though I will say females making the first move is more common than one may think it definitely still isnt the norm though.
Im more curious in 35 and younger because maybe thats where my disconnect is if i do have one.
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

Shame is for the weak! Also, I'm ditching all you old-schoolers, this thread is lame. Later, losers!

*the cool flippy thing with a skateboard*

wait . . . are skateboards in right now? jk ;)
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

Question and your answer will be based on your age 35 and below or 36 and up

So you have class 3 days a week and sit with a person. You think they are a pretty ok person to talk to. They invite you to hang with their friends a few times and you go. So then on one of these outings, this person relizes they are attracted to you. they muster up the courage and they make a move, they lean in for a kiss. (nothing rough no grabbing no force they simply lean in for a kiss)

Do you think that actions is:

(Age 35 below) Normal, common and Appropriate as described
(Age 36 and up) Normal, common and Appropriate as described

(Age 35 below) Bad behavior, uncommon and inappropriate as described
(Age 36 and up) Bad behavior, uncommon and inappropriate as described


If you need more info to answer ask and ill give it.

It's been this way longer than writing has been around. Never has been a school for it. There are over 7 billion people on this planet. I'd say its pretty common and normal. Appropriate? That's subjective and only the individual can decide that for themselves. Personally I would not object if I were single. However I'm married so considering the person has spent time around me both in and outside of class they should know that and I would consider it inappropriate.
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

I selected the second option. (Age 36 and up) Normal, common and Appropriate as described.
I would say the same were I under 35, simply because I've been in various positions to observe teenaged and young adult interactions after aged 35, at least prior to the last decade.
Personal experience and my subsequent observations of other's indicates that the onus (with few exceptions) is still on the male to make the first move.
Yet there is no school except the school of experience for a male to learn from.
Meanwhile, each girl simply assumes the male KNOWS (or should know) how to interpret her subtle clues as to what she wants and doesn't want.

This is very well put. Men (boys) don't have a guidebook for these types of interactions, and most women do a terrible job of telegraphing their intentions, so it often ends up with the guy putting himself out on a limb, sometimes it pays off, sometimes it doesn't. Either way, if you don't occaisonally take the risk, you'll strike out 100% of the time.
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

Man, TheGoverness is going to be disappointed in our autistic screeching when she logs back on this afternoon...

Lizards have long tongues.
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

Ya But a girl he has known for less than a week on day 7 or 8 on campus bending over and planting a kiss on her so fast that she does not reject the try BEFORE the lips reach HOME,,,,,,,no, that was pretty much never OK, and almost everyone understand that, and if they did not they just might have ended up beaned in the head with a heavy object.

Women, you see, knew the remedy.

Nope.... No. Longer. Allowed.

You never kissed on a first date?
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

Question and your answer will be based on your age 35 and below or 36 and up

So you have class 3 days a week and sit with a person. You think they are a pretty ok person to talk to. They invite you to hang with their friends a few times and you go. So then on one of these outings, this person relizes they are attracted to you. they muster up the courage and they make a move, they lean in for a kiss. (nothing rough no grabbing no force they simply lean in for a kiss)

Do you think that actions is:

(Age 35 below) Normal, common and Appropriate as described
(Age 36 and up) Normal, common and Appropriate as described

(Age 35 below) Bad behavior, uncommon and inappropriate as described
(Age 36 and up) Bad behavior, uncommon and inappropriate as described


If you need more info to answer ask and ill give it.

Im 35 and I'm saying its normal.
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

Question and your answer will be based on your age 35 and below or 36 and up

So you have class 3 days a week and sit with a person. You think they are a pretty ok person to talk to. They invite you to hang with their friends a few times and you go. So then on one of these outings, this person relizes they are attracted to you. they muster up the courage and they make a move, they lean in for a kiss. (nothing rough no grabbing no force they simply lean in for a kiss)

Do you think that actions is:

(Age 35 below) Normal, common and Appropriate as described
(Age 36 and up) Normal, common and Appropriate as described

(Age 35 below) Bad behavior, uncommon and inappropriate as described
(Age 36 and up) Bad behavior, uncommon and inappropriate as described


If you need more info to answer ask and ill give it.

Not surprisingly, your poll options do not really cover what I think. I am over 35. I think it is uncool and kinda a dick move. I do not think it is that uncommon because reading social and relationship situations is not exactly easy, and it is very easy to misread things into what you want to read kinda thing.

By the way, "normal" and "bad behavior" are not opposites, and are not even the same kinda thing. It is like you are asking if a car is old, or a sportscar. It is entirely possible for it to be both normal, and bad behavior.
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

I selected the second option. (Age 36 and up) Normal, common and Appropriate as described.

I would say the same were I under 35, simply because I've been in various positions to observe teenaged and young adult interactions after aged 35, at least prior to the last decade.

Personal experience and my subsequent observations of other's indicates that the onus (with few exceptions) is still on the male to make the first move.

Yet there is no school except the school of experience for a male to learn from.

Meanwhile, each girl simply assumes the male KNOWS (or should know) how to interpret her subtle clues as to what she wants and doesn't want.

IMO some young people today are buying into a lot of third wave feminist misinformation.

They seem to think love and attraction is something to be discussed in depth, as if preparing some kind of contract, before anything is expected to occur.

Yet you can't dictate love and attraction, what someone finds desirable or undesirable. People literally observe, make assumptions, then act hoping for the best.

Asserting that a male playing the role nature and nurture have dictated when trying to engage with a female is equivalent to sexual assault in every case when "permission is not asked first" is being disingenuous IMO.

Anyone else ever heard a girl say "If you have to ask, then the answer is no!" Think about it. :twocents:

Well that is ****ing stupid. Clue: "first move" is not the same thing as "kiss".
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

This is very well put. Men (boys) don't have a guidebook for these types of interactions, and most women do a terrible job of telegraphing their intentions, so it often ends up with the guy putting himself out on a limb, sometimes it pays off, sometimes it doesn't. Either way, if you don't occaisonally take the risk, you'll strike out 100% of the time.

When I was much younger and far less traveled and weary of the world and excitement seemed a good thing, decided that after an unsuccessful outing and getting beat about my head and shoulders because I made a move that was apparently unwelcome, I decided hence forth that I will ask the girls out on the date but after that it was ALL on the girls to make the first moves. I would make that clear in a very charming way to my dates. (If I should say so myself) The response was surprising verses the normal way of me figuring out if there was something going on or not. My hit rate like darn near tripled. I could go on infinitum in boring fashion, but the bottom line is woman respect and like it if men draw a line for them to cross if they want.

*note I tended to date aggressive women to begin with, so my results may be skewed.
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

When I was much younger and far less traveled and weary of the world and excitement seemed a good thing, decided that after an unsuccessful outing and getting beat about my head and shoulders because I made a move that was apparently unwelcome, I decided hence forth that I will ask the girls out on the date but after that it was ALL on the girls to make the first moves. I would make that clear in a very charming way to my dates. (If I should say so myself) The response was surprising verses the normal way of me figuring out if there was something going on or not. My hit rate like darn near tripled. I could go on infinitum in boring fashion, but the bottom line is woman respect and like it if men draw a line for them to cross if they want.

*note I tended to date aggressive women to begin with, so my results may be skewed.

As you pointed out, I'm not sure that would work with all, or even most women, as most women do enjoy the classical gender roles and want the man to make the first move. Honestly it's just about finding a technique that works for you and then just playing the field and improving it over time. Sometimes you'll inevitably strike out, sometimes you'll make a home run. The guy mentioned in the OP definitely learned something new, it's his first few days of college so he has lots of time to try to get it right. Hopefully for him the next girl will be more into him. I think there's a tiny amount of blame to be placed on Governess for being a little naive. Guys aren't generally looking for pretty girls to be friends with, and hopefully she's learned that lesson as well.
 
Re: Describe this behavior and identify your age group

Question and your answer will be based on your age 35 and below or 36 and up

So you have class 3 days a week and sit with a person. You think they are a pretty ok person to talk to. They invite you to hang with their friends a few times and you go. So then on one of these outings, this person relizes they are attracted to you. they muster up the courage and they make a move, they lean in for a kiss. (nothing rough no grabbing no force they simply lean in for a kiss)

Do you think that actions is:

(Age 35 below) Normal, common and Appropriate as described
(Age 36 and up) Normal, common and Appropriate as described

(Age 35 below) Bad behavior, uncommon and inappropriate as described
(Age 36 and up) Bad behavior, uncommon and inappropriate as described


If you need more info to answer ask and ill give it.

I don't think Trump would have a problem with it. But hey! He's the free love generation.
 
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