Why Men Won't Marry You

ataraxia said:

I think studies have shown that married men are, on average, happier than unmarried ones, and live longer too (probably because their wife keeps nagging them to go to the doctor).

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I would like to see the controls on that study. And I would like to know how many divorced men said they were happier than they were before they got married.

Bodhisattva said:

Prenups are a good idea...

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I wouldn't get hitched without it.

SMTA said:

Single women avoid conservative men because they have a crush on Trump.

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Seeing as you are the one who has a need to constantly bring Trump into every discussion no matter how off topic it would appear you are the one with the crush. But you feel guilty over it so you attack Trump to hide your feelings.

Bodhisattva said:

So if you and I play basketball and I don't tell you I don't want to make the NBA but you are thinking that you do then I am leading you on? :lol:

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this makes no sense. come back with a better structured statement.

however to fix this for you it would be more like
we are playing in an armature basketball one on one game and no professionals allowed and you play in the NBA and lie your way in.

Mason66 said:

No they don't but her head gets affected with that kind of life.

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Does it mess up the head of men when they bag as many women as they can find who say "yes"?

ludin said:

this makes no sense. come back with a better structured statement.

however to fix this for you it would be more like
we are playing in an armature basketball one on one game and no professionals allowed and you play in the NBA and lie your way in.

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I don't know about you and Bodi's analogies, but I agree that it is important to be up front regarding what level of commitment you are willing to give someone. If someone is expecting to enter in a long term relationship which they hope eventually leads to marriage, it is really unfair to not tell them that marriage is out of the question. But...there is always a but.

My wife and I lived together unmarried for 12 years. When we met, both of us were pretty adamant about not getting married again. Eventually, that changed. Why or how that happened I have no idea....maybe after 12 years we both just said, "What the hell. Let's try this." :shrug:

calamity said:

I don't know about you and Bodi's analogies, but I agree that it is important to be up front regarding what level of commitment you are willing to give someone. If someone is expecting to enter in a long term relationship which they hope eventually leads to marriage, it is really unfair to not tell them that marriage is out of the question. But...there is always a but.

My wife and I lived together unmarried for 12 years. When we met, both of us were pretty adamant about not getting married again. Eventually, that changed. Why or how that happened I have no idea....maybe after 12 years we both just said, "What the hell. Let's try this." :shrug:

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glad it worked out for you, but not me. i don't want that level of commitment again. plus when her crazy starts there's the door you are free to leave.
it costs too much money to get rid of them when you are married.

ludin said:

glad it worked out for you, but not me. i don't want that level of commitment again. plus when her crazy starts there's the door you are free to leave.
it costs too much money to get rid of them when you are married.

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Hopefully we waited long enough to both be past our crazy stage. It's amazing how hormones balance out with age. But, I totally understand what you mean. We had several "break up" stages during our first 12 years. If we had been married, I am sure it would have blown up.

calamity said:

Does it mess up the head of men when they bag as many women as they can find who say "yes"?

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Monogamy is a little like saying that if you love fine French food, then you can never have Thai, or shish kabobs, or Italian pasta, or hot dogs, or chicken tandoori, or sushi, ever again.

ataraxia said:

Monogamy is a little like saying that if you love fine French food, then you can never have Thai, or shish kabobs, or Italian pasta, or hot dogs, or chicken tandoori, or sushi, ever again.

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I was amazed at how quickly that attitude changed after age 50. I haven't figured out though whether it is no longer wanting Thai, Shish Kabobs, Italian pasta, or hot dogs, or chicken tandoori, or sushi, ever again, or if, perhaps, it was just knowing that I'll never again find such a great French Chef at my age and figure the Thai, Shish Kabobs, Italian pasta, or hot dogs, or chicken tandoori and sushi are out of reach now anyway.

After all, why ditch a perfectly great spouse to chase after a 28 year-old who can be on the cover of a magazine when you know you will just be chasing your tail or, worse, buying her because she is into your money much more than she is into you?

calamity said:

Does it mess up the head of men when they bag as many women as they can find who say "yes"?

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What does that question have to do with what I said?

That's not how evolution works.

The idea of marriage is an old one. In the past it was beneficial for both men and women. Why, because believe it or not men and women are sexually dimorphic and before big government and police existed. Men would go around raping whoever they wanted.

There were two people that had an interest in protecting women. Fathers and Husbands, women would find a caring man that would treat her right and protect her from harm from other brutes.

Now that isn't really the case so women don't need a saviour. But at the same time men don't need an exclusive partner, because if women start increasing the amount of men they sleep with it increases the amount of men that are having sex as well (more women than men).

Basically the only reason for marriage these days is if you find a partner that can potentially be a good friend for life and you want the legal benefits it comes with. Marriage is a tradition. And you know what they say about traditions. Sport for fools to indulge in.