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Men's Rights Dweebs

Josie said:
This isn't about any "men's rights activists", but an acquaintance of mine who said something similar as the OP. He's been married once with a child and then has another child with his former girlfriend. He told me that girls with no kids or marriages wouldn't give him the time of day. I said, "Would you go for a girl who has a couple kids with two different dads?" and he looked at me like I was insane and said that was "incredibly gross". Uh....... *eyeroll*
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I don't get that. Why wouldn't you want to be a dad to kids who clearly need one?
 
cpwill said:
I don't get that. Why wouldn't you want to be a dad to kids who clearly need one?
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He was disgusted at the thought of dating someone who had kids with different dads (she's a whore, essentially). Apparently, he didn't get the irony there.
 
cpwill said:
I don't get that. Why wouldn't you want to be a dad to kids who clearly need one?
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Why would you want to raise someone else's kids?
 
Josie said:
He was disgusted at the thought of dating someone who had kids with different dads (she's a whore, essentially). Apparently, he didn't get the irony there.
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I tried to think through it - if you were coming from a position of belief, where you yourself had never been married (or had been saved after your last divorce), and wasn't willing to marry someone not equally yoked, I could get that...

But this guy is a moron. Absent religious/divorce issues, were the uncomprehensible to happen, and I find myself widowed and childless, I would think that the chance to be a dad again would make a woman more attractive to me as a partner, rather than less.
 
Henrin said:
:lol:

I have to admit I like the western woman bit.

You should add "do as your told".

What people aren't getting when they insult MGTOW and red pill is that it's women that caused it. A lot of western women have really no business being in a realtionship.
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With you? I trust they'll pick up on that.
 
Henrin said:
Why would you want to raise someone else's kids?
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For the same reason we are thinking about fostering at some point, or bringing my sister-in-law's daughter to come stay with us at some point: because kids need dads. Because loving and raising kids is good in and of itself.
 
cpwill said:
I don't get that. Why wouldn't you want to be a dad to kids who clearly need one?
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There might be no opportunity to raise those kids, only an opportunity to get fleeced financially.
 
SDET said:
There might be no opportunity to raise those kids, only an opportunity to get fleeced financially.
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Unlikely unless I adopt, in which case those kids are just as much "mine" as "hers".

But if that's how you see an opportunity to raise kids, well, I trust you will find yourself safe from the danger of doing so.
 
cpwill said:
For the same reason we are thinking about fostering at some point, or bringing my sister-in-law's daughter to come stay with us at some point: because kids need dads. Because loving and raising kids is good in and of itself.
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Meh, I just have no interest in that. I'm sorry, but I would never date a woman with kids.
 
cpwill said:
Unlikely unless I adopt, in which case those kids are just as much "mine" as "hers".

But if that's how you see an opportunity to raise kids, well, I trust you will find yourself safe from the danger of doing so.
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He was talking about dating a woman with kids, you know. There is a lot of risk added for men in that situation that you didn't consider.
 
cpwill said:
We know, Henrin.
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There was no reason to change my post to insult me. If you can't act like an adult then maybe you should stop responding to me.
 
Henrin said:
He was talking about dating a woman with kids, you know. There is a lot of risk added for men in that situation that you didn't consider.
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:shrug: I'm not talking about dating. I'm talking about marrying - though sure, dating would be part of the process to that.

Simply dating? Comes with zero financial risk, unless you decide to have sex and produce a child of your own.


But, kids aren't financial risks. They are kids. And they deserve dads. If you aren't willing to be a dad, then don't have vaginal intercourse :shrug: otherwise, you run varying degrees of risk.
 
cpwill said:
:shrug: I'm not talking about dating. I'm talking about marrying - though sure, dating would be part of the process to that.

Simply dating? Comes with zero financial risk, unless you decide to have sex and produce a child of your own.


But, kids aren't financial risks. They are kids. And they deserve dads. If you aren't willing to be a dad, then don't have vaginal intercourse :shrug: otherwise, you run varying degrees of risk.
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There is a difference between raising my own kids and raising the children of another man. I'm more than happy to raise my own kids, but I have no interest in raising the children of another man.
 
Henrin said:
There is a difference between raising my own kids and raising the children of another man. I'm more than happy to raise my own kids, but I have no interest in raising the children of another man.
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Even if you do have an interest, a disreputable woman will marry and divorce as many men as she can. Her men won't be dads; they will be ATMs.
 
Henrin said:
There is a difference between raising my own kids and raising the children of another man. I'm more than happy to raise my own kids, but I have no interest in raising the children of another man.
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If you are the one raising them, then to the degree you've done so, they're your kids, even if they don't share your biological material. Just as if you and your wife adopted a child neither of you had parented. Kids need dads, and only men can provide them - part of being a man is providing for children, and so this is a chance for you to take on a task that is often high in frustration, but also rich in joy.


The wife in this case is a bigger risk than the kids (and so is the guy). If you haven't had a true heart change after you've been through a divorce and/or multiple sexual relationships, then you are setting yourself up for another divorce/breakup/fatherless-child scenario by getting involved again. I wouldn't be worried about raising the kids - I'd want to make sure the woman was committing to me as fully and for-life as I was committing to her.
 
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cpwill said:
If you are the one raising them, then to the degree you've done so, they're your kids, even if they don't share your biological material. Just as if you and your wife adopted a child neither of you had parented.
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I don't believe in that philosophy, sorry. If they're my kids biologically then they're my kids, but if they're not my kids biologically then they're not my kids.

The wife in this case is a bigger risk than the kids (and so is the guy). If you haven't had a true heart change after you've been through a divorce and/or multiple sexual relationships, then you are setting yourself up for another divorce/breakup/fatherless-child scenario by getting involved again. I wouldn't be worried about raising the kids - I'd want to make sure the woman was committing to me as fully and for-life as I was committing to her.
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That's always a consideration though.
 
Henrin said:
I don't believe in that philosophy, sorry. If they're my kids biologically then they're my kids, but if they're not my kids biologically then they're not my kids.
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:shrug: this is incorrect. If we adopt, that is our child, regardless of her biological background.

Parenthood is not exclusive or zero-sum. One person playing a parental role does not mean that others cannot or do not.


That's always a consideration though.
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It is more of a worry in the situation described than in others, but generally yes. This is why it's important to date to marry, and seriously date only those who already agree with you on this important presupposition.
 
cpwill said:
:shrug: this is incorrect. If we adopt, that is our child, regardless of her biological background.


Parenthood is not exclusive or zero-sum. One person playing a parental role does not mean that others cannot or do not.
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And I don't define parent like you do. To me a parenthood is biological. Anyone can be a caregiver to a child, but not everyone can be its parent. Just my two cents.


It is more of a worry in the situation described than in others, but generally yes. This is why it's important to date to marry, and seriously date only those who already agree with you on this important presupposition.
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I'm not interested in marriage, but yes, you should consider what you said no matter what.
 
Henrin said:
And I don't define parent like you do. To me a parenthood is biological. Anyone can be a caregiver to a child, but not everyone can be its parent. Just my two cents.
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:shrug: kids and parents tend to disagree, but alright.
 
cpwill said:
I tried to think through it - if you were coming from a position of belief, where you yourself had never been married (or had been saved after your last divorce), and wasn't willing to marry someone not equally yoked, I could get that...

But this guy is a moron. Absent religious/divorce issues, were the uncomprehensible to happen, and I find myself widowed and childless, I would think that the chance to be a dad again would make a woman more attractive to me as a partner, rather than less.
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Same although I think I would look for someone who likes kids but doesn't want any.
If she has kids then they need to be older like college or something.

I am not having any more kids I am done. Too old for babies.
 
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