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Thread: How Have I Avoided being Victimized by Feminism?[W:59]

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    How Have I Avoided being Victimized by Feminism?[W:59]

    So, I spent some time over the weekend in the company of people who, I do not know if they would call themselves MRAs, but they were definitely from the "feminism is BS, Feminism victimizes Men, Feminism seeks to turn men into cucks and betas, Feminism wants to weaken and socially displace Men, Feminism is the root of practically every problem for the modern male" school. I'm sure you know the type, and they really seemed to feel it deeply. They were resentful and angry at women that mad manipulated them into terrible relationships or dragged them along and used them or who got years worth of friendship out of them while making them feel the might have a chance but they never got any sex, or who made them feel ashamed for being a man and made them feel lost and helpless in the world etc etc etc, I'm sure you've all heard these things before as well.

    So I didnít argue with these guys, I just listened and probed, just listed and asked questions and nodded. And the prevailing theme seems to be that everything is womenís fault. It's women's fault theyíre broke and women's fault their kid's dont speak to them and women's fault they have emotional issues its women's fault they drink it womenís fault they got that DUI, its womenís fault they donít know what to do with their life. Women are bitches and shouldnít be trusted and are only a pair and tits and ass and good for a **** them leave them, and itís womenís fault they talk that way about women because of the way previous women victimized them.

    So I am listening to this and I am just blown away. All I keep thinking is "Man, I have had a radically different experience with women than these guys."

    I'm not an old salt, but I'm by no means a spring chicken either. I'm 30 and I've had plenty of relationships that ranged from one night stands up to full on cohabitating multi-year pseudo marriage and everything in between. I've had good relationships that made everything seem better and bad ones that gut you and require you to rebuild once they are over. All that jazz.

    But I have hardly ever felt victimized even by a woman in particular and never felt victimized by women as a gender in general. I have never felt like I needed to feel ashamed for being a man. I have never felt like I have been displaced or had my masculine identity or social place undermined or threatened. I have never felt particularly manipulated or tricked or deceived by women. All of these experiences that these MRAish types go on and on about are just utterly foreign to me.

    That is not to say I've never known crummy dishonest manipulative vain greedy women, of course I have, but not like, more so than men, not more so than just the average fact that occasionally in your life you come across such people. I certainly have never felt like women or feminists as some sort of coalition have wronged me in any way.

    How is it that all of these men feel so oppressed and victimized by women and feminism, when I have never felt that way? How have I never run into these, apparently, incredibly personally affecting gender dynamics these guys all seem to have themselves wrapped up in knots over?

    Am I just incredibly lucky? Do I just surround myself with a higher caliber of person and therefore don't usually end up romantically entangled with those types of people?

    Or is it maybe that these resentful butt hurt old boys club is blind to the fact that they are their own biggest problem. I encounter the exact same social landscape they do, in fact most of my friends are liberal so I probably encounter even more of these ultra feminist types than they do, and yet I do not have these problems....that would indicate either there is something particularly special about me (which I don't think there is) or these guys are actually their own problem without realizing it.

    And it canít just be that I am not old enough or have not been in enough relationships for the true ugly side of women to have shown themselves to me. I know plenty of SUPER salty MRA types younger than I. And many who are older than I but have had fewer relationships. And plenty of old men who live their whole lives never getting this anti-women saltiness.

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    Re: How Have I Avoided being Victimized by Feminism?

    Ever hear the term toxic masculinity? Did you ever notice how feminists use that to describe whatever they don't like about male culture? Ever notice how feminists want to change men and their culture? Ever notice how feminists actually made it a point in the sixties and seventies to change the behavior of men? Ever notice how they are still doing that today? Why do feminists get to dictate to men how they will behave?

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    Re: How Have I Avoided being Victimized by Feminism?

    Quote Originally Posted by jimithyashford View Post

    So I am listening to this and I am just blown away. All I keep thinking is "Man, I have had a radically different experience with women than these guys."

    I'm not an old salt, but I'm by no means a spring chicken either. I'm 30 and I've had plenty of relationships that ranged from one night stands up to full on cohabitating multi-year pseudo marriage and everything in between. I've had good relationships that made everything seem better and bad ones that gut you and require you to rebuild once they are over. All that jazz.

    But I have hardly ever felt victimized even by a woman in particular and never felt victimized by women as a gender in general. I have never felt like I needed to feel ashamed for being a man. I have never felt like I have been displaced or had my masculine identity or social place undermined or threatened. I have never felt particularly manipulated or tricked or deceived by women. All of these experiences that these MRAish types go on and on about are just utterly foreign to me.

    That is not to say I've never known crummy dishonest manipulative vain greedy women, of course I have, but not like, more so than men, not more so than just the average fact that occasionally in your life you come across such people. I certainly have never felt like women or feminists as some sort of coalition have wronged me in any way.

    How is it that all of these men feel so oppressed and victimized by women and feminism, when I have never felt that way? How have I never run into these, apparently, incredibly personally affecting gender dynamics these guys all seem to have themselves wrapped up in knots over?

    Am I just incredibly lucky? Do I just surround myself with a higher caliber of person and therefore don't usually end up romantically entangled with those types of people?

    Or is it maybe that these resentful butt hurt old boys club is blind to the fact that they are their own biggest problem. I encounter the exact same social landscape they do, in fact most of my friends are liberal so I probably encounter even more of these ultra feminist types than they do, and yet I do not have these problems....that would indicate either there is something particularly special about me (which I don't think there is) or these guys are actually their own problem without realizing it.

    And it can’t just be that I am not old enough or have not been in enough relationships for the true ugly side of women to have shown themselves to me. I know plenty of SUPER salty MRA types younger than I. And many who are older than I but have had fewer relationships. And plenty of old men who live their whole lives never getting this anti-women saltiness.
    I didn't get married until I was in my forties, so to say I had numerous relationships would be stating the obvious. I never called myself a victim of women, feminist or other, period. I did make mistakes and wound up in relationships with, err, nuts, but I noticed no correlation between nuttiness and feminism. I just viewed as my mistake, and I got the hell out.

    My wife would call herself a feminist, but that would be a feminism from the mid-eighties when she graduated college. I would say we have a very equal relationship, and given that equality has been one of the things I've sought in a relationship, maybe I've just avoided the really poisonous ones. By equality here, I'm setting aside the obvious male and female differences and focusing on the idea that neither party is always dominant, has the last word, right no matter what, etc.

    I will tell you something I started seeing in my early 30's : Divorcees and obvious 'rejects for good reason' start to become more prevalent. Not that there aren't still great ones out there, even among the divorcees with kids, but they become harder to find. I got lucky!
    - Formerly Porkuloss

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    Re: How Have I Avoided being Victimized by Feminism?

    Quote Originally Posted by Porkuloss View Post
    I didn't get married until I was in my forties, so to say I had numerous relationships would be stating the obvious. I never called myself a victim of women, feminist or other, period. I did make mistakes and wound up in relationships with, err, nuts, but I noticed no correlation between nuttiness and feminism. I just viewed as my mistake, and I got the hell out.

    My wife would call herself a feminist, but that would be a feminism from the mid-eighties when she graduated college. I would say we have a very equal relationship, and given that equality has been one of the things I've sought in a relationship, maybe I've just avoided the really poisonous ones. By equality here, I'm setting aside the obvious male and female differences and focusing on the idea that neither party is always dominant, has the last word, right no matter what, etc.

    I will tell you something I started seeing in my early 30's : Divorcees and obvious 'rejects for good reason' start to become more prevalent. Not that there aren't still great ones out there, even divorcees with kids, but they become harder to find. I got lucky!
    Did now that it was feminists that demanded the "equal" realtionship? Why do women get to tell me what to do more housework?

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    Re: How Have I Avoided being Victimized by Feminism?

    I'd suggest changing the company you keep to avoid infection with the man as victim virus.
    Don't work out, work in.

    Never eat anything that's served in a bucket.

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    Re: How Have I Avoided being Victimized by Feminism?

    Quote Originally Posted by Henrin View Post
    Did now that it was feminists that demanded the "equal" realtionship? Why do women get to tell me what to do more housework?
    You need to re-read my post. Neither of us bosses the other around. Why do conservative women expect that men will always run in front of them and "hold the door"?

    FWIW, my wife does most of the "housework" now, but she spent a good number of years bringing home 120K+ (was my equal there) and during that time we just hired someone to do it.
    - Formerly Porkuloss

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    Re: How Have I Avoided being Victimized by Feminism?

    Quote Originally Posted by Manc Skipper View Post
    I'd suggest changing the company you keep to avoid infection with the man as victim virus.
    True. Sounds like a bunch of crybabies.
    - Formerly Porkuloss

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    Re: How Have I Avoided being Victimized by Feminism?

    Quote Originally Posted by Porkuloss View Post
    You need to re-read my post. Neither of us bosses the other around. Why do conservative women expect that men will always run in front of them and "hold the door"?
    Then you didn't use the right word for your realtionship.

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    Re: How Have I Avoided being Victimized by Feminism?

    Quote Originally Posted by Porkuloss View Post
    True. Sounds like a bunch of crybabies.
    MGTOW, MRA, and Red Pill are all growing movements. You might want to stop and listen at some point.

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    Re: How Have I Avoided being Victimized by Feminism?

    If the whole MRA thing focused on legitimate issues like bias in the family courts and suicide rates among men I would take them seriously. But at some point they were taken over by misogynists who have had bad luck with women and can't take responsibility for their own failures. I love Bill Burr's standup also, but he is a comic, not a messiah.
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