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This type of study is one that goes against my gut instinct. My instinct was to reject its findings simply because I find it hard to believe that women enjoy male pain. Well, after about 10 seconds more of reading I found that the premise was a little more palatable. Science is tasty like that.
So my thoughts are as follows, if women really can't bear to be disconnected for even the smallest amount of time, that could lead to some problems in relationships. Women feel there is an incentive to expose men, and men do not want to be exposed, and thus men feel violated by prying women. This is especially true when men are held to a higher standard than women, or expected to perform.
For example, if a woman wants her partner to earn more money, the issue may double if her partner is not open to discussing money. Money is a sensitive issue for a lot of men and women.
On the other hand, women who are not granted access face a different problem. They must either coerce an insincere relationship, or cultivate a stagnant relationship. In the long term, that might mean she risks over-committing to a non-functional relationship in order to compensate.
It is ironic that women expect men to perform to a certain degree over a longer period of time than, say intercourse. Thus, a man should not force a woman to sexually perform, and the two partners may go their separate ways. But in some situations it is acceptable (according to women) for a woman to cause a man emotional distress if it is in the best interest of the relationship. In the short term, there is less at stake, but we still treat bodily autonomy (i.e. personal space) as more important than social autonomy (i.e. social space). His partner having a headache might be an immediately accepted reason to cease sexual relations, yet her partner having a headache might cast doubt on the nature of the relationship.
What Women Really Want in a Relationship | TIME.com
http://www.apa.org/pubs/journals/releases/fam-26-2-236.pdf
Surprisingly, the researchers found, women were more likely to report higher relationship satisfaction when they could read their partners’ anger or frustration than when they could identify their happiness. No, it’s not that women revel in their significant others’ distress; rather, it’s that they prefer negative emotion to withdrawal or silence. “For women, seeing their husband or boyfriend upset is a reflection of their partner’s emotional engagement. When women see their male partners sharing their negative emotions, they see it as a sign of connection, openness and communication. Women don’t like it when men distance themselves during conflict,” says the study’s lead author, Dr. Shiri Cohen of Harvard Medical School.
So my thoughts are as follows, if women really can't bear to be disconnected for even the smallest amount of time, that could lead to some problems in relationships. Women feel there is an incentive to expose men, and men do not want to be exposed, and thus men feel violated by prying women. This is especially true when men are held to a higher standard than women, or expected to perform.
For example, if a woman wants her partner to earn more money, the issue may double if her partner is not open to discussing money. Money is a sensitive issue for a lot of men and women.
On the other hand, women who are not granted access face a different problem. They must either coerce an insincere relationship, or cultivate a stagnant relationship. In the long term, that might mean she risks over-committing to a non-functional relationship in order to compensate.
It is ironic that women expect men to perform to a certain degree over a longer period of time than, say intercourse. Thus, a man should not force a woman to sexually perform, and the two partners may go their separate ways. But in some situations it is acceptable (according to women) for a woman to cause a man emotional distress if it is in the best interest of the relationship. In the short term, there is less at stake, but we still treat bodily autonomy (i.e. personal space) as more important than social autonomy (i.e. social space). His partner having a headache might be an immediately accepted reason to cease sexual relations, yet her partner having a headache might cast doubt on the nature of the relationship.
What Women Really Want in a Relationship | TIME.com
http://www.apa.org/pubs/journals/releases/fam-26-2-236.pdf