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It's been two years...

I have been away from this thread for a bit.

Have you found anything useful?

Have you got to the place where you want to be back to being the loving great dad and husband you clearly are given the chance?

I started talking to an online therapist, it's slow going, he advised me to argue less on the internet. Compounding negatives and all that.

Now that the anniversary date is a couple weeks behind me, and I got someone to cry at for an hour when I need it, I've gotten into somewhat of a better place with a routine. But, I can't say i'm not hurting anymore. I just miss him so damn much.
 
I started talking to an online therapist, it's slow going, he advised me to argue less on the internet. Compounding negatives and all that.

Now that the anniversary date is a couple weeks behind me, and I got someone to cry at for an hour when I need it, I've gotten into somewhat of a better place with a routine. But, I can't say i'm not hurting anymore. I just miss him so damn much.

That will never go away, but it will lessen. It won't be that raw, open wound like it is now. My father died unexpectedly, and I felt like it was my fault. It took me a long time, but eventually I got into a place where I stopped blaming myself. When you blame yourself for someone's death, even though it wasn't your fault that your son died any more than it was my fault that my father had a stroke, it increases the grieving tenfold. It takes far longer to recover.

Get yourself to a place where you don't feel like you are to blame, because you are not.
 
I started talking to an online therapist, it's slow going, he advised me to argue less on the internet. Compounding negatives and all that.

Now that the anniversary date is a couple weeks behind me, and I got someone to cry at for an hour when I need it, I've gotten into somewhat of a better place with a routine. But, I can't say i'm not hurting anymore. I just miss him so damn much.

1, Well done, you are making progress. You would not have been able to do what you are doing last year.

2, It will never not be a hurt.

3, You will get it together for the rest of your family and yourself.

4, Good luck.
 
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