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Are today's kids spoiled?

What's the cause of today's bratty children?

  • Total voters
    52
  • Poll closed .
Rexedgar said:
I don’t agree with the friends model, but have seen it in more than a few parent/child relationships......
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Some of the very worse parental relationships I've seen have been when parents, particularly single parents, decide to be cool friends with their teenagers and their kids' friends. When I look back at some of the single-mothers my friends had when we were kids, I get disgusted. At 15, what I thought was "cool" in a parent, no longer strikes me that way now that I'm an adult. I saw some pretty pathetic stuff, back then. A lot went wrong in the sixties & seventies, and some of the collateral damage was poor & naive parenting. Sometimes the societal pendulum swings too far in an opposite direction, until it finds the right equilibrium.
 
The most common problem I see with "kids today" are parents that make threats they have no intention of ever following through on. At some point the kids realize the parent is full of ****.
 
TheGoverness said:
That really depends on how far you take it. Like, unlike with my mom, who irritates me because she has something to say about what I'm wearing, or how my hair looks, blah blah blah. My dad doesn't do any of that, and I actually have zero problem talking to him about anything super personal, and I just have an overall more relaxed demeanor around my dad. As a consequence, I like hanging out with my dad more than with my mom. I feel like I always have a guard up with my mom, and our relationship is still strained to an extent.

I think 100% friend is a bit too far, but mutual understanding goes a long way to strengthen a parent-child relationship, I think.
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I think as long as the primary relationship is Father-Daughter or Mother-Daughter, than all else that follows is well & good.

My point was that the relationship is special & singularly unique. It is not a common, "friendship". To treat any of my kids with less than the full respect of our unique & special bond, would make me feel like I'm disrespecting them. They are singularly special to me, and no other relationship can describe or match that. Al others fall short.
 
Poor parenting is the cause of many kinds of ****ty behaviors in kids. All teachers' lives would be so much easier if parents would just teach their kids to respect authority figures and their peers.
 
captaintrips said:
There are a lot of different cultural pressures on all of us- parents & kids - too.

Might be a factor in ways also.
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My mom, growing up as a teenager, started listening to this crazy new band called the Beatles. Her parents, who really thought anything other than classical music was vulgar, low class, and unrefined, were absolutely outraged and kept asking themselves where they went wrong. But my mom turned out alright. She still likes to listen to the Beatles. But she even goes to classical music concerts now too sometimes.

I think all parents are a little bit shellshocked by their kids’ generation.
 
radioman said:
Good point !!!
Beating defenseless children is what wise parents do.
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Every mammal on the planet smacks their kids. It's called "cuffing".

It just isn't ritualized or an outlet for parental frustration with their lives.

The "cubs" get a smack and its over, usually followed with affection. Do whatever it was again you get another smack. And another "hug".

Even cetaceans do this.
 
Rexedgar said:
That’s revenge!



The kids need to believe that there will be a consequence and parents need to follow through. There WILL BE consequences on the street when they act up.....
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Someone once told me you can gauge how well you get along with your inlaws by the volume of the toys they get your kids.
 
What if...? said:
Every mammal on the planet smacks their kids. It's called "cuffing".

It just isn't ritualized or an outlet for parental frustration with their lives.

The "cubs" get a smack and its over, usually followed with affection. Do whatever it was again you get another smack. And another "hug".

Even cetaceans do this.
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This one lady I know told me that growing up, they could be playing perfectly quietly with their toys in the corner, and their mom would just come over and give them all a good whipping. When they asked why she was beating them she would tell them it’s to make sure they don’t grow up spoiled.

This lady had some serious psychiatric issues.
 
Crosscheck said:
Totally agree. How much energy does it take to help with the coat and seat?

That along with opening doors for others. I bet you are like me and totally impressed when a member of another party going through doors will stand and hold the door for your party. It does not take that much energy to do that but it provides that acknowledgement that we are trying to make it through this life and want others to make it too.
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Exactly. Actions like this show respect on so many levels, including as said - we're all in this together.

But with our kids there's an added incentive to not just do it because it's the "right thing". As our kids go forward in life, we don't know the environments they will operate in. But in some segments of professional and business life, they will be expected to display those same social mannerisms to clients and co-workers. In addition, good social skills will increase your kids' desirability in social and yes - romantic circles too.

Trust me, as a father it is always in the back of my mind that the way I treat my daughters will greatly influence their expectations of how the men they let in their lives should treat them. If my kids are treated with dignity and respect in within our house, it is my hope they will demand the same respect of those they partner-up with outside of our house. Well, that's the theory anyway!
 
What if...? said:
Every mammal on the planet smacks their kids. It's called "cuffing".

It just isn't ritualized or an outlet for parental frustration with their lives.

The "cubs" get a smack and its over, usually followed with affection. Do whatever it was again you get another smack. And another "hug".

Even cetaceans do this.
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Studies done in the 1960s showed definitively that physical abuse does not raise better kids. There are much better methods of discipline, and many good books out there talking about them.

Beating a child will temporarily make them stop doing whatever it was they were doing. But they still don’t know why it was wrong. And the lesson they usually take away is that might makes right and intimidation works. Many bullies in school come from families where corporal punishment is commonplace.

It is a psychologically very traumatic and damaging experience for the children. One child psychologist I talk to says that one of her biggest challenges is to get parents from families where this is a part of their culture to stop. When she shares the data with Sam, they usually learn to stop. She says the ones she has the most difficulty with, however, are the ultra religious Christian types Who prefer to continue to believe the “spare the rod spoil the child” type scriptures over any modern science.
 
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Mr Person said:
I've seen it used to defend use of a literal rod, or a belt, etc. That's beating, even if the person doing it considers it "discipline." :shrug:
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Well, I never imagined it would be taken literally - so what can I say? Regardless, it is highly doubtful the poster meant the phrase in the literal sense. But, so be it. I hope no one thinks my "kids" eat old tin cans ....
 
ecofarm said:
It's not like kids have a good example today in the nation's top representative. Most parents usher children out of the room if he's on TV. If they behaved like him, they'd be suspended all the time.

Perhaps the larger concern here is "wtf happened to Trump's generation?"
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Now that's really the dumbest bunch of bunk I've heard. I doubt most of our spoiled children have hardly seen the "top representative" on TV. They are way too busy playing video games and texting.
 
Integrityrespec said:
Now that's really the dumbest bunch of bunk I've heard. I doubt most of our spoiled children have hardly seen the "top representative" on TV. They are way too busy playing video games and texting.
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King Spoiled Child sits upon his imagined throne. Thanks, boomers.
 
Rexedgar said:
I was taught to get up whenever a woman approached a table, when she left a table, etc. These actions get raised eyebrows in this day and age....
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I hate to say it, but I do usually rise for women in public settings in those situations. Same for removing my shades when talking to a women, and ditto for a hat (which I rarely wear). And no hats indoors. We still enforce that with our kids when we're together (no hats indoors). What the kids do on their own is their business, but no one wears a baseball hat sitting at our table when we're together!

I'm also no fan of of gym shoes when not in a gym or on a court, but that's a whole 'nother thing! :2razz:
 
Spoiled kids? Look around you. We are a spoiled nation.
 
ecofarm said:
It's not like kids have a good example today in the nation's top representative. Most parents usher children out of the room if he's on TV. If they behaved like him, they'd be suspended all the time.

Perhaps the larger concern here is "wtf happened to Trump's generation?"
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You mean the generation that enabled this country to be the richest and most powerful country the world has ever seen?
And who are the representatives kid should look up to? Why not parents as representatives?
If parents don't want to kids to see the president on TV , why not just switch channels and put on National Geographic?
Something that won't traumatize snowflake kids who are on their way to be "woke" and ready to fall in love with Bernie Sanders?
 
Chomsky said:
:thumbs:

I raised my son the help his sister with her coat & chair when we go out to restaurants, along with a few other dying chivalrous acts. It is my great hope he will treat the other women he meets later in life with the same consideration & respect, and it's also my hope my daughter will expect the same courtesy and respect from the men she allows into her life.

It's really old school, but I always take my wife's coat and help her with her seat in public. She loves it done for her, and I love doing it. It just exudes respect, and I find it romantic!
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Rexedgar said:
I was taught to get up whenever a woman approached a table, when she left a table, etc. These actions get raised eyebrows in this day and age....
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Chomsky said:
I hate to say it, but I do usually rise for women in public settings in those situations. Same for removing my shades when talking to a women, and ditto for a hat (which I rarely wear). And no hats indoors. We still enforce that with our kids when we're together (no hats indoors). What the kids do on their own is their business, but no one wears a baseball hat sitting at our table when we're together!

I'm also no fan of of gym shoes when not in a gym or on a court, but that's a whole 'nother thing! :2razz:
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:applaud Very nice
 
Praxas said:
I've raised mine not to be a spoiled, petulant, temper tantrum throwing, lying child like the current President Trump. Perhaps Trump's parents spoiled him too much.
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You're demeaning the president because he grew up and became a billionaire by being a smart businessman.
The business of this country is business and Trump is at the top of that food chain.
I can see you're ready for a Bernie revolution because, right now, that's all the Democrats have going for them.
 
jaypatriot said:
You mean the generation that enabled this country to be the richest and most powerful country the world has ever seen?
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Many a nation has seen progress in spite of, not because of, leaders. I ain't impressed with time.
 
ataraxia said:
My mom, growing up as a teenager, started listening to this crazy new band called the Beatles. Her parents, who really thought anything other than classical music was vulgar, low class, and unrefined, were absolutely outraged and kept asking themselves where they went wrong. But my mom turned out alright. She still likes to listen to the Beatles. But she even goes to classical music concerts now too sometimes.

I think all parents are a little bit shellshocked by their kids’ generation.
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Oh baby. I bet her parents absolutely loved Led Zep!

Led Zeppelin was universally hated by all parents. All. Bar none!
 
ecofarm said:
King Spoiled Child sits upon his imagined throne. Thanks, boomers.
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Your generation is gonna be looked on with scorn, one day. Sooner than later, imo.....don’t **** it up!
 
Rexedgar said:
Your generation is gonna be looked on with scorn, one day. Sooner than later, imo.....don’t **** it up!
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We're not gonna put a Trump up there, so you guys suck more.
 
radioman said:
Good point !!!
Beating defenseless children is what wise parents do.
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There are parents who know how to use corporal punishment sparingly.
I only spanked my daughter once because she set fire to our back yard.
And she does not hate me for it.
 
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