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Was I wrong?

Was I wrong to ask her to stop?

  • Yes

    Votes: 2 4.4%
  • No

    Votes: 43 95.6%

  • Total voters
    45

Kreton

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I coach for the city here where i live. Varying sports for ages 4-13 depending on where they need help coaching. For baseball this year one of my teams is a 4-5 year old t ball team. We had our first practice last night and two women came with a little girl. I introduced myself and said hi and they immediately went on a little speech about how they are together, they are lesbians, they are raising this girl together, nothing wrong with that. Then go into whats going to happen if I discriminate against their daughter because of their sexuality, threatening lawsuits and explaining that there are laws ect. I told them I was there to teach their daughter softball, and their sexual orientation was not a factor at all and moved along. As I am meeting other parents a few of them commented that this lady had approached them and gave them a similar speech out of nowhere. After all the kids were there I gathered the kids together and started off having the kids introduce themselves to their teammates. No additional information really, just kid would say my name is Earl. And everyone would say Hi Earl to start to learn teammates names. When the little girl told everyone her name, again the lady popped into action giving her speech to everyone out there. I stopped her after about a minute and spoke to her privately, or as privately as I could on a baseball field, and let her know that it is not appropriate to interrupt a team activity like that, and again told her noone is going to be discriminating against her daughter. So today I get a call from the city letting me know she filed a complaint and is taking her child off of my team because I told her she had to hide her sexuality at our practices so it wouldn't bother other parents. I dont recall my exact wording but it was not mean, the word hiding or even sexuality didnt come out of my mouth. I only asked her not to interrupt our practices and tried to assure he that I don't care what her sexual preference is, I am there to teach baseball and the other parents are only there to watch.

Was I wrong to ask her to stop what she was doing?
 
Obviously I don't think I was wrong, but I have to go meet with the sports director and someone from their HR to discuss how to handle it in the future. I haven't really spoken to them much about it but, who knows how they may interpret it when we meet.
 
I coach for the city here where i live. Varying sports for ages 4-13 depending on where they need help coaching. For baseball this year one of my teams is a 4-5 year old t ball team. We had our first practice last night and two women came with a little girl. I introduced myself and said hi and they immediately went on a little speech about how they are together, they are lesbians, they are raising this girl together, nothing wrong with that. Then go into whats going to happen if I discriminate against their daughter because of their sexuality, threatening lawsuits and explaining that there are laws ect. I told them I was there to teach their daughter softball, and their sexual orientation was not a factor at all and moved along. As I am meeting other parents a few of them commented that this lady had approached them and gave them a similar speech out of nowhere. After all the kids were there I gathered the kids together and started off having the kids introduce themselves to their teammates. No additional information really, just kid would say my name is Earl. And everyone would say Hi Earl to start to learn teammates names. When the little girl told everyone her name, again the lady popped into action giving her speech to everyone out there. I stopped her after about a minute and spoke to her privately, or as privately as I could on a baseball field, and let her know that it is not appropriate to interrupt a team activity like that, and again told her noone is going to be discriminating against her daughter. So today I get a call from the city letting me know she filed a complaint and is taking her child off of my team because I told her she had to hide her sexuality at our practices so it wouldn't bother other parents. I dont recall my exact wording but it was not mean, the word hiding or even sexuality didnt come out of my mouth. I only asked her not to interrupt our practices and tried to assure he that I don't care what her sexual preference is, I am there to teach baseball and the other parents are only there to watch.

Was I wrong to ask her to stop what she was doing?

No...she sounds like a ****ing idiot.

Sounds like you dodged a bullet
 
No...she sounds like a ****ing idiot.

I dont disagree, but I am worried that this is going to turn into something that gets me pulled from coaching while they look into or whatever they do. Especially since i have to meet with the city's hr rep. Its bothering the **** out of me since i got the call.
 
I coach for the city here where i live. Varying sports for ages 4-13 depending on where they need help coaching. For baseball this year one of my teams is a 4-5 year old t ball team. We had our first practice last night and two women came with a little girl. I introduced myself and said hi and they immediately went on a little speech about how they are together, they are lesbians, they are raising this girl together, nothing wrong with that. Then go into whats going to happen if I discriminate against their daughter because of their sexuality, threatening lawsuits and explaining that there are laws ect. I told them I was there to teach their daughter softball, and their sexual orientation was not a factor at all and moved along. As I am meeting other parents a few of them commented that this lady had approached them and gave them a similar speech out of nowhere. After all the kids were there I gathered the kids together and started off having the kids introduce themselves to their teammates. No additional information really, just kid would say my name is Earl. And everyone would say Hi Earl to start to learn teammates names. When the little girl told everyone her name, again the lady popped into action giving her speech to everyone out there. I stopped her after about a minute and spoke to her privately, or as privately as I could on a baseball field, and let her know that it is not appropriate to interrupt a team activity like that, and again told her noone is going to be discriminating against her daughter. So today I get a call from the city letting me know she filed a complaint and is taking her child off of my team because I told her she had to hide her sexuality at our practices so it wouldn't bother other parents. I dont recall my exact wording but it was not mean, the word hiding or even sexuality didnt come out of my mouth. I only asked her not to interrupt our practices and tried to assure he that I don't care what her sexual preference is, I am there to teach baseball and the other parents are only there to watch.

Was I wrong to ask her to stop what she was doing?

If it happened just as you described why do you think you need to ask if you were right or wrong?

If it happenned just as you described I don't think any rational person could possibly say you were in the wrong. Which makes me wonder why you have to ask...
 
If it happened just as you described why do you think you need to ask if you were right or wrong?

If it happenned just as you described I don't think any rational person could possibly say you were in the wrong. Which makes me wonder why you have to ask...

Im mostly asking because its on my mind trying to determine how the city is going to view this. her pulling kid off my team is silly to me, but wouldn't bother me. The city having me come in tonight, has to be tonight, and they are working late to have this meeting makes me feel like they think i did.
 
I dont disagree, but I am worried that this is going to turn into something that gets me pulled from coaching while they look into or whatever they do. Especially since i have to meet with the city's hr rep. Its bothering the **** out of me since i got the call.

Bring along a parent that saw everything or an assistant coach if possible. Explain that you never kicked her out and has to continually reassure her that her kid wouldn't be discriminated against.

I think if you and another adult who agrees with you explained the story then there isn't much that could really come of it.
 
Im mostly asking because its on my mind trying to determine how the city is going to view this. her pulling kid off my team is silly to me, but wouldn't bother me. The city having me come in tonight, has to be tonight, and they are working late to have this meeting makes me feel like they think i did.

Eh, it's damage control dude. Don't worry. Worrying about it won't change a thing. Get someone else to tag along that saw the whole thing. Or more than one if you can. If you explain it honestly and have witnesses and they still want to make a big deal of it then so be it.
 
Bring along a parent that saw everything or an assistant coach if possible. Explain that you never kicked her out and has to continually reassure her that her kid wouldn't be discriminated against.

I think if you and another adult who agrees with you explained the story then there isn't much that could really come of it.

My wife said same thing, to ask another parent to come. Most of what was said was probably heard, but i feel wierd asking them to come for something like this, when i just met them last night.
 
I dont disagree, but I am worried that this is going to turn into something that gets me pulled from coaching while they look into or whatever they do. Especially since i have to meet with the city's hr rep. Its bothering the **** out of me since i got the call.

Who knows...they may play it safe but I find it hard she can prove that you told her to "hide her sexuality" because the words never left your mouth. Something like that is virtually impossible to prove unless she lies and then if she lies it's he said vs she said which isn't exactly going to fly.

At the end of the day, she was obnoxious and other parents seem like they would back you up on that. I'm don't think there's any legal right to barrage everyone as soon as you meet them like you're reading them their Miranda rights.
 
My wife said same thing, to ask another parent to come. Most of what was said was probably heard, but i feel wierd asking them to come for something like this, when i just met them last night.

You don't have to ask them to come to the meeting...ask a couple if the people your meeting with can call them if they would like. Just so you have that in your back pocket.

I really don't see much of an issue man....they will investigate and there's nothing there. I'm sure they are use to stuff like this and have to deal with this kind of stuff all the time.
 
I coach for the city here where i live. Varying sports for ages 4-13 depending on where they need help coaching. For baseball this year one of my teams is a 4-5 year old t ball team. We had our first practice last night and two women came with a little girl. I introduced myself and said hi and they immediately went on a little speech about how they are together, they are lesbians, they are raising this girl together, nothing wrong with that. Then go into whats going to happen if I discriminate against their daughter because of their sexuality, threatening lawsuits and explaining that there are laws ect. I told them I was there to teach their daughter softball, and their sexual orientation was not a factor at all and moved along. As I am meeting other parents a few of them commented that this lady had approached them and gave them a similar speech out of nowhere. After all the kids were there I gathered the kids together and started off having the kids introduce themselves to their teammates. No additional information really, just kid would say my name is Earl. And everyone would say Hi Earl to start to learn teammates names. When the little girl told everyone her name, again the lady popped into action giving her speech to everyone out there. I stopped her after about a minute and spoke to her privately, or as privately as I could on a baseball field, and let her know that it is not appropriate to interrupt a team activity like that, and again told her noone is going to be discriminating against her daughter. So today I get a call from the city letting me know she filed a complaint and is taking her child off of my team because I told her she had to hide her sexuality at our practices so it wouldn't bother other parents. I dont recall my exact wording but it was not mean, the word hiding or even sexuality didnt come out of my mouth. I only asked her not to interrupt our practices and tried to assure he that I don't care what her sexual preference is, I am there to teach baseball and the other parents are only there to watch.

Was I wrong to ask her to stop what she was doing?

There are things you don't do. If you do them, the consequences can be dire. It is getting bad in the US now. But hey, think of the Scholl kids. They didn't get off that easily.
 
Just to add, i've been coaching for some years, and I have never had a parent complain about me. At least not to my knowledge. If they did the city didnt feel the need to call me about it.
 
I coach for the city here where i live. Varying sports for ages 4-13 depending on where they need help coaching. For baseball this year one of my teams is a 4-5 year old t ball team. We had our first practice last night and two women came with a little girl. I introduced myself and said hi and they immediately went on a little speech about how they are together, they are lesbians, they are raising this girl together, nothing wrong with that. Then go into whats going to happen if I discriminate against their daughter because of their sexuality, threatening lawsuits and explaining that there are laws ect. I told them I was there to teach their daughter softball, and their sexual orientation was not a factor at all and moved along. As I am meeting other parents a few of them commented that this lady had approached them and gave them a similar speech out of nowhere. After all the kids were there I gathered the kids together and started off having the kids introduce themselves to their teammates. No additional information really, just kid would say my name is Earl. And everyone would say Hi Earl to start to learn teammates names. When the little girl told everyone her name, again the lady popped into action giving her speech to everyone out there. I stopped her after about a minute and spoke to her privately, or as privately as I could on a baseball field, and let her know that it is not appropriate to interrupt a team activity like that, and again told her noone is going to be discriminating against her daughter. So today I get a call from the city letting me know she filed a complaint and is taking her child off of my team because I told her she had to hide her sexuality at our practices so it wouldn't bother other parents. I dont recall my exact wording but it was not mean, the word hiding or even sexuality didnt come out of my mouth. I only asked her not to interrupt our practices and tried to assure he that I don't care what her sexual preference is, I am there to teach baseball and the other parents are only there to watch.

Was I wrong to ask her to stop what she was doing?

If everything is as you described, then no, you did nothing wrong.
 
There are things you don't do. If you do them, the consequences can be dire. It is getting bad in the US now. But hey, think of the Scholl kids. They didn't get off that easily.

So you think I shouldn't have said anything? I am thinking now if i just let her finish to the whole group, get it off her chest it may have ended right then and there and she may not have brought it back up and no problems.
 
I coach for the city here where i live. Varying sports for ages 4-13 depending on where they need help coaching. For baseball this year one of my teams is a 4-5 year old t ball team. We had our first practice last night and two women came with a little girl. I introduced myself and said hi and they immediately went on a little speech about how they are together, they are lesbians, they are raising this girl together, nothing wrong with that. Then go into whats going to happen if I discriminate against their daughter because of their sexuality, threatening lawsuits and explaining that there are laws ect. I told them I was there to teach their daughter softball, and their sexual orientation was not a factor at all and moved along. As I am meeting other parents a few of them commented that this lady had approached them and gave them a similar speech out of nowhere. After all the kids were there I gathered the kids together and started off having the kids introduce themselves to their teammates. No additional information really, just kid would say my name is Earl. And everyone would say Hi Earl to start to learn teammates names. When the little girl told everyone her name, again the lady popped into action giving her speech to everyone out there. I stopped her after about a minute and spoke to her privately, or as privately as I could on a baseball field, and let her know that it is not appropriate to interrupt a team activity like that, and again told her noone is going to be discriminating against her daughter. So today I get a call from the city letting me know she filed a complaint and is taking her child off of my team because I told her she had to hide her sexuality at our practices so it wouldn't bother other parents. I dont recall my exact wording but it was not mean, the word hiding or even sexuality didnt come out of my mouth. I only asked her not to interrupt our practices and tried to assure he that I don't care what her sexual preference is, I am there to teach baseball and the other parents are only there to watch.

Was I wrong to ask her to stop what she was doing?

There are things you don't do. If you do them, the consequences can be dire. It is getting bad in the US now. But hey, think of the Scholl kids 1933. They didn't get off that lightly.
 
I coach for the city here where i live. Varying sports for ages 4-13 depending on where they need help coaching. For baseball this year one of my teams is a 4-5 year old t ball team. We had our first practice last night and two women came with a little girl. I introduced myself and said hi and they immediately went on a little speech about how they are together, they are lesbians, they are raising this girl together, nothing wrong with that. Then go into whats going to happen if I discriminate against their daughter because of their sexuality, threatening lawsuits and explaining that there are laws ect. I told them I was there to teach their daughter softball, and their sexual orientation was not a factor at all and moved along. As I am meeting other parents a few of them commented that this lady had approached them and gave them a similar speech out of nowhere. After all the kids were there I gathered the kids together and started off having the kids introduce themselves to their teammates. No additional information really, just kid would say my name is Earl. And everyone would say Hi Earl to start to learn teammates names. When the little girl told everyone her name, again the lady popped into action giving her speech to everyone out there. I stopped her after about a minute and spoke to her privately, or as privately as I could on a baseball field, and let her know that it is not appropriate to interrupt a team activity like that, and again told her noone is going to be discriminating against her daughter. So today I get a call from the city letting me know she filed a complaint and is taking her child off of my team because I told her she had to hide her sexuality at our practices so it wouldn't bother other parents. I dont recall my exact wording but it was not mean, the word hiding or even sexuality didnt come out of my mouth. I only asked her not to interrupt our practices and tried to assure he that I don't care what her sexual preference is, I am there to teach baseball and the other parents are only there to watch.

Was I wrong to ask her to stop what she was doing?




You were fine. She came there looking for trouble, and determined to invent some if none occurred naturally.

BTDT... best wishes, there's a tendency of orgs to want to crucify you at the slightest hint of Non PCness, even imaginary.
 
So you think I shouldn't have said anything? I am thinking now if i just let her finish to the whole group, get it off her chest it may have ended right then and there and she may not have brought it back up and no problems.

Don't worry if it wasn't you telling her to stop it would have been something else. Sounds like she was itching to find something somewhere probably she wants attention. I think you were in the right that her little speech has no place as a little kids baseball practice and like someone else said try to find another parent to back you up.
 
So you think I shouldn't have said anything? I am thinking now if i just let her finish to the whole group, get it off her chest it may have ended right then and there and she may not have brought it back up and no problems.

I can't imagine that if everything went as described that that would have been the end of it. The only other thing I could have seen you do is offer to let her have 2 minutes to address the kids after you had finished your coaching session in order to clear the air but I doubt that would have fixed anything.

I just feel sorry for the kid. It's going to be hard for her going through life if everyone she meets is scolded by her mom immediately afterwards warning them that she is being raised by two women and that they better deal with it.
 
So you think I shouldn't have said anything? I am thinking now if i just let her finish to the whole group, get it off her chest it may have ended right then and there and she may not have brought it back up and no problems.

I'm not sure it was the easiest way to fight for freedom of speech, but you were not wrong in the fact, I should say. But it would be good to take sides in political discussions like here and vote against people that propagate such ideas.
 
I coach for the city here where i live. Varying sports for ages 4-13 depending on where they need help coaching. For baseball this year one of my teams is a 4-5 year old t ball team. We had our first practice last night and two women came with a little girl. I introduced myself and said hi and they immediately went on a little speech about how they are together, they are lesbians, they are raising this girl together, nothing wrong with that. Then go into whats going to happen if I discriminate against their daughter because of their sexuality, threatening lawsuits and explaining that there are laws ect. I told them I was there to teach their daughter softball, and their sexual orientation was not a factor at all and moved along. As I am meeting other parents a few of them commented that this lady had approached them and gave them a similar speech out of nowhere. After all the kids were there I gathered the kids together and started off having the kids introduce themselves to their teammates. No additional information really, just kid would say my name is Earl. And everyone would say Hi Earl to start to learn teammates names. When the little girl told everyone her name, again the lady popped into action giving her speech to everyone out there. I stopped her after about a minute and spoke to her privately, or as privately as I could on a baseball field, and let her know that it is not appropriate to interrupt a team activity like that, and again told her noone is going to be discriminating against her daughter. So today I get a call from the city letting me know she filed a complaint and is taking her child off of my team because I told her she had to hide her sexuality at our practices so it wouldn't bother other parents. I dont recall my exact wording but it was not mean, the word hiding or even sexuality didnt come out of my mouth. I only asked her not to interrupt our practices and tried to assure he that I don't care what her sexual preference is, I am there to teach baseball and the other parents are only there to watch.

Was I wrong to ask her to stop what she was doing?

She's a little spoiled brat. Good she's gone.
 
You totally discriminated. Under the newer definitions of bias and discrimination, it matters not what you actually intended, you're guilty just because of who you are. This could be just like that Ferguson shooting. It won't matter if you're justified. If it could be true, then it's as good as true.
 
Now wait for the lawsuit.
But first, people will tell you there are no militant gays or gay agenda.
Too bad for that child.
 
Obviously I don't think I was wrong, but I have to go meet with the sports director and someone from their HR to discuss how to handle it in the future. I haven't really spoken to them much about it but, who knows how they may interpret it when we meet.

This is a PC issue so there is no "right" way to handle it. Basically, the only course of action that might prevent you from getting fired and probably thrown in jail is to extoll the virtues of homosexuality in a 3000 word essay in the local paper and propose erecting a monument to lesbians in center field.
 
I voted "yes" you were wrong.

I assume the question was in regard to inserting paragraph breaks in your post.
 
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