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A part of that is the incredible increase in partisan divisiveness since then.I think iguanaman draws a very good distinction at how people with different political leans view things. A Marine base in Lebanon gets bombed and 241 Marines are dead under Reagan's watch and he walks away from it losing no political ground, but four people die in Libya and not only is America reminded of it on a near constant basis over the last 4 years, but a presidential hopeful is raked over the coals both by Congress with multiple Congressional Hearings on the matter and in the media.
The same could be said when comparing Reagan's negotiations with Russia over a nuclear arms reduction deal and President Obama over his on-going negotiations w/Iran to preclude them from producing and/or acquiring a nuclear weapon. People tend to see only what they want to see when they just can't bring themselves to take off their partisan blinders long enough to see things more clearly.
Plus, no one really felt that Reagan didn't care, just that we were naive and didn't protect ourselves well enough. A horribly tragic mistake, but a naively honest one. Hillary comes off as simply not caring, and her own comments to Congress only exacerbated that feeling. And because of how the world has changed, AND the lessons we should have learned from incidents like Lebanon, we should have known better and planned better.