Getting an organ transplant is ethical since the organ in question being removed is in need of medical treatment and if not acted on the patient will die, while sex change operations involve acting on healthy body parts and damaging them beyond repair. They are not at all comparable, sorry.
A drag queen is not necessarily a transgender, so that doesn't make much sense. Transsexual is used as you said for people that started hormone treatment at the very least, transgender can be used for both people that started treatment and those that didn't.I mean transsexuals, transgender is a giant umbrella of possibilities that people can fall under. Transsexuals actively change their sex, through hormones and surgery. They are transgendered individuals as much as a drag queen/king is under the same umbrella.
No, I'm picturing someone that looks like a woman well enough to play the part. I'm not one of those people foolish enough to believe hormone treatment and the surgery are not enough to fool people into believing a lie.I think you'd do well to actually meet a transsexual, but you probably have and didn't know it. While they aren't a high percentage of the population, as they are a minority of a minority, it is no different than meeting someone who is gay and not knowing it. Not everyone fits a mold of "flamboyant". You are probably picturing cross dressers instead of transsexuals in your head, and I can't fault you for that, but they are not the same.
And I have no interest in meeting a transsexual in real life, but I have more than once online. For me anyway, that is more than enough.