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How We Raise Our Daughters - 21st Century [W:87,158,368]

We should be raising our daughters


  • Total voters
    86
Oh that's right. And if it's a girl, no college or additional education will be needed.

Correct. She gets a wedding paid for instead of college. Even a son I would be suggesting look at a trade school rather than a college at this point in time.


He didnt make any bargains or deals or promises to me....except that if I accept his Son into my heart and ask forgiveness, I will be admitted into His Kingdom.

Not sure what all you think he owes you.

We have very different views on what we expect or don't expect from a diety. I know my father wasted 54 years (to the day) on that garbage and I don't intend to make the same mistake.
 
Nobody is saying they/she can't or shouldn't. Assuming that's what they want and chose to do.

You're the one saying your fiance SHOULDN'T and CAN'T be a nurse, teacher, engineer, carpenter, plumber, pilot, insurance agent, auto mechanic, police officer, .......

Exactly. Sadly, there are still those who seriously believe that women should never be anything BUT unpaid domestic servants in the home, simply because they are women. I guess some folks, both men AND women, can't move beyond the early centuries when women had NO rights whatsoever.

Thankfully, the dark days in American history, when women had little to NO options in life, are gone. Women now have the freedom to enter the trades and professions to earn a good living on their own, WITHOUT having to be forced into marriage simply to have some kind of home. Assuming a woman has the education and training, she can enter any field she chooses, which includes being a doctor, lawyer, architect, scientist, technician, engineer, mathematician, law enforcement officer (state or federal), even the military.

Contrary to what the ultra-regressive conservatives want everyone to believe, women are much better off being able to get the education and training to earn our own living and keep our own money instead of having to rely on a man for every little thing in life. Having to be completely dependent on a man or one's family for the essentials of money, food, and a home is IMO the worst kind of oppression and degradation a woman could be stuck with.
 
YOUR Lord, not mine. He and I have long since stopped having any form of interaction or conversation. Just a piece of advice.... Don't trust in Him too much. He WON'T be there when you need Him. You can quote me on that the next time you talk to Him.

But you still believe in Heaven or an afterlife?
 
..... Having to be completely dependent on a man or one's family for the essentials of money, food, and a home is IMO the worst kind of oppression and degradation a woman could be stuck with.

Even when SHE chooses that sort of life?
 
We should instil in our daughters a proper set of values, not those of 21st century decadence. They should be raised to be polite, respectful, and of course inquisitive.
 
Raise them however you want. But before they get their first monthly visit, someone should explain to them that there is no direct connection between the stomach and the Uterus.
 
It appears that there are trolls and potential family annihilators on this thread.

What is a "family annihilator"?
 
We should instil in our daughters a proper set of values, not those of 21st century decadence. They should be raised to be polite, respectful, and of course inquisitive.

...and compliant, submissive and quiet.
 
Oh that's right. And if it's a girl, no college or additional education will be needed.

Housework and child raising do not require college...
 
If I had a daughter, I would teach her:

To treat everyone fairly regaurdless of race, gender, or thought:

There are still children heavily influenced by their parents beliefs which are dated and out of touch with current day morality.

To allow herself to rely on others (to trust) but not to her detriment:

To many people today are actually TO INDEPENDENT! This has gotten in the way of healthy relationships both with friends and significant others. Trust has gone out the window. That being said, I would also teach her the pitfalls of trusting the wrong person. It is not always bad to give someone a chance with your trust and let them fail, but if you decide to gamble, make sure it's a gable you can afford to loose.

To not take advantage of her own gender, but also understand that their is beauty in being a female. As well as utility in being male.

I would teach my daughter that she should not conform to the current culture of taking advantage of her gender. She should be willing to do anything she asks someone else to do for her, or at least try it. But at the same time understanding there is a difference between men and women and those differences are beautiful and not indicative of submissiveness or discrimination. To many women today do not appreciate what men do for them and even worse, feel that what men can do for them enslaves them instead of helps them. Blaming men for their inherent biological differences that they can do nothing about. That taking a submissive role and trusting a man to make a decision and standing behind him, right or wrong, is not a bad thing. But at the same time, not being submissive to her detriment. That both men and women should be submissive to each other. That is the only way a healthy relationship can go on.

To abandon the idea that a man should approach her to initiate a relationship and that the jocks in life are the ones she should be interested in:

It is time for women to step up to the plate and believe in what they preach. They want to be equal in the office at work, but still want to play the submissive role when it comes to dating. Then they want to complain about all the assholes they attract when they don't do anything to go out and initiate a relationship. When I say initiate a relationship, I don't mean to choose from the group of guys that approach her, but to go out and approach a guy herself without initiation from the guy. I would teach her that the best way to find a good guy is to make an effort to approach one. To throw the traditional notions out the window that an attractive guy has to be an alpha male ("jock"), has to be make a lot of money (post high school jock type), or have a high status. Because none of this matters. What matters is if she is in love with the person, not the superficialness of him, but the heart of the person.

Those are just a few things I would teach my daughter, if I had one.

What is wrong with jocks? I was an honor roll 4 year letterman jock in three different sports. Nobody was more of a jock than me... nobody. I still managed great grades and the ability to impress myself in many areas of life. I am very good looking as well.

I would not teach my daughter to approach guys because if they approached the wrong guy that could create problems. Getting to know a guy first in a realm where they have common interests or run into each other is better. Then they are not approaching. Instead they are initiating another step in an already existing relationship. It is also better to avoid the slut approach which would certainly get tossed around quickly.

Other than those two you have a lot of sweeping generalities...
 
...and compliant, submissive and quiet.

:lamo So your the guy responsible for Tigger's education on raising female children... :lol:

You better tell these folks you're messin with their heads...or some'll believe ya...
 
:lamo So your the guy responsible for Tigger's education on raising female children... :lol:

You better tell these folks you're messin with their heads...or some'll believe ya...

As a father of two daughters... shhh!
 
...and compliant, submissive and quiet.

Not at all. Being a polite and respectful lady does not mean being quiet or submissive. Woman today are more empowered than ever in Western countries. Having a good moral system instilled in them doesn't mean they cannot achieve their ambitions and doesn't deny them the chance to live well and express themselves. Instilling such values simply gives them a compass for life. What's so wrong about raising someone with manners and respect? The same should apply for raising boys too.
 
We should instil in our daughters a proper set of values, not those of 21st century decadence. They should be raised to be polite, respectful, and of course inquisitive.

Shouldn't all children be raised to be polite, respectful and inquisitive?
 
Shouldn't all children be raised to be polite, respectful and inquisitive?

Yes. Girls shouldn't be raised differently to boys other than looking after their emotional needs differently (due to the biological fact of different levels of sensitivity and different stages and speeds of maturity).
 
Not at all. Being a polite and respectful lady does not mean being quiet or submissive. Woman today are more empowered than ever in Western countries. Having a good moral system instilled in them doesn't mean they cannot achieve their ambitions and doesn't deny them the chance to live well and express themselves. Instilling such values simply gives them a compass for life. What's so wrong about raising someone with manners and respect? The same should apply for raising boys too.

The best way to display manners and respect for females is in being compliant, submissive and not heard. Boys? Totally different. Females can be ambitious if they are single and can express themselves at the nail salon.
 
Yes. Girls shouldn't be raised differently to boys other than looking after their emotional needs differently (due to the biological fact of different levels of sensitivity and different stages and speeds of maturity).

You are saying that girls are more needy emotionally?
 
Yes, I'm saying precisely that, and I think it's a well-documented biological fact.

... then show some documents stating that then because that isn't even close to correct.
 
... then show some documents stating that then because that isn't even close to correct.

Do Boys and Girls Express Their Emotions Differently?

According to a recent study led by Tara M. Chaplin of the Department of Psychiatry at Yale University School of Medicine, boys and girls have very different emotional tendencies, but these fluctuate depending on age and context. In her study, Chaplin reviewed data from over 21,000 participants from over 160 separate studies focusing on emotional expression from birth to adolescence. Chaplin looked at internalizing and externalizing emotions as well as positive and negative expressions. The study revealed some interesting and novel results. Chaplin said, “Our findings suggest that there are small but significant gender differences in emotion expressions, with larger gender differences emerging at certain ages and in certain contexts.” She found that in infancy, the boys and girls exhibited similar emotional displays. However, as the children aged, significant differences emerged.

Specifically, Chaplin found that the girls internalized their emotions more than the boys, but they also displayed more positive emotions. For instance, the girls had higher rates of anxiety and sadness than the boys, but outwardly expressed more cheerfulness and joy. The boys, on the other hand, were more likely to exhibit anger and aggression than the girls. But these variances were only evident when the children were in the presence of strangers. When they were with their parents, the children expressed a wide range of emotions, making the gender differences virtually non-existent. Chaplin believes that children may feel more comfortable with parents and may feel free to express all of their emotions. In social settings, children may feel the need to conform and therefore may not freely express their true emotions, leading to internalizing behaviors.

Although these emotional differences were very noticeable during the toddler and elementary school ages, they were less apparent as the children matured. For instance, externalizing behaviors diminished in the boys and increased in the girls, almost to the point of being equal. Two other findings revealed concerning patterns. The adolescent girls had higher levels of shame than the boys. Because shame and guilt have been shown to be a factor in several psychological problems, including depression, self-harm, and disordered eating, this should be a key point of focus for educators and clinicians working with teen girls. Also, boys felt more joy than girls when they were provided the opportunity to taunt or tease another individual. This is disturbing too because this could increase the risk for these boys to engage in bullying and aggressive behavior. Because the trajectory of emotional expression changes as children mature, and because it is heavily influenced by family environment, social factors, and other external conditions, children will display a wide range of emotions as they develop. However, Chaplin believes it is also important to be able to identify which expressions are normal and which are signs of concern.
 
Housework and child raising do not require college...

Go make me a sandwich.

What is wrong with jocks? I was an honor roll 4 year letterman jock in three different sports. Nobody was more of a jock than me... nobody. I still managed great grades and the ability to impress myself in many areas of life. I am very good looking as well.

This sounds like you're saying that you're a chick.

As a father of two daughters... shhh!

Here you tell us that you're a dude. Knowing that you're a dude completely undermines the argument about women jocks that you made above. And terrific for you that you're a good looking dude.
 

You said girls were more emotionally needy. This post doesn't come close to stating such a thing. In fact, it is pretty apparent that both genders have significant emotional issues and needs.

"girls had higher rates of anxiety and sadness than the boys, but outwardly expressed more cheerfulness and joy
boys, on the other hand, were more likely to exhibit anger and aggression than the girls.

When they were with their parents, the children expressed a wide range of emotions, making the gender differences virtually non-existent

externalizing behaviors diminished in the boys and increased in the girls, almost to the point of being equal.

girls had higher levels of shame than the boys. Because shame and guilt have been shown to be a factor in several psychological problems, including depression, self-harm, and disordered eating, this
boys felt more joy than girls when they were provided the opportunity to taunt or tease another individual. This is disturbing too because this could increase the risk for these boys to engage in bullying and aggressive behavior."

The most important part is this though:

"Because the trajectory of emotional expression changes as children mature, and because it is heavily influenced by family environment, social factors, and other external conditions, children will display a wide range of emotions as they develop."
 
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