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Re: Men: Would You Marry an American Woman?
Hear, hear! :lol:
Yes. Multiple Hears.
Hear, hear! :lol:
Yes. Multiple Hears.
That would likely warrant a more forceful response. However, even then, I think an ultimatum would probably be more effective than simply forbidding the activity outright.
i.e.
"I'm willing to help and support you every step of the way, but if this doesn't change, I walk."
Frankly, if the behavior were simply an annoyance rather than a real problem, positive reinforcement meant to encourage behavior change would probably be a more effective tool than confrontation anyway.
Provide incentives for his behavior to change.
Lord knows that women have plenty of means available to accomplish that. :lol:
Maybe it was an innuendo. Don't let it make your imagination run wild. Then again, it might be more fun that way. :mrgreen:Well, yes they are, but one never knows if it's an innuendo or something, when it comes to you. :mrgreen:
If either party of a marriage is a problem drinker, it won't be a healthy marriage because that automatically triggers controlling behavior in both. Marriages can certainly survive it whether or not the problem drinker or other addict gets at handle on that, but they won't be healthy.
Well, to me, that IS forbidding. How much farther into forbidden territory could you go?
You can't KILL the person! :lol:
Hear, hear! :lol:
:shrug: and for the spouse who has been injured by an addiction, it is perfectly reasonable to put limits on behavior, and helpful for the relationship as well. Nor do you require an addiction for such a restriction to be healthy or appropriate - each partner should seek to submit to the others' legitimate needs.
Many years of experience with women, tells me, that women nationality does not matter.
Well, it's hardly groundbreaking, but thank you. There simply is no better way to insure the passing on of ones' jeans.
If given the chance to re-marry would you marry (another) American woman?
Increasingly the answer is "no".
Men are increasingly disrespected by American women. They face extreme economic and social disadvantages in family law that makes it possible for a wife to divorce them and take most of what they have including their children for any reason or no reason. They are constantly told that they are worthless and stupid. Disrespect for men has become standard practice. Men are disrespected by their wives – they’re disrespected publicly, they’re disrespected privately, they’re disrespected and then told that they have no right to be upset about it because they aren’t worthy of respect in the first place.
Disrespect of men is a joke to Americans now.
The result has been that men are increasingly dropping out of society. They don't marry, they don't go to college because they see no reason to break their humps to get ready to provide for a family -- they aren't going to be having a family.
Lots has been written about this phenomena, most of it in the strain of "why is it that men are so childish now." But men are not dropping out because of arrested development. They are acting rationally in response to myriad laws, attitudes and hostility against them for the crime of happening to be male in the twenty-first century.
Men on Strike: Why Men Are Boycotting Marriage, Fatherhood, and the American Dream - and Why It Matters: Helen Smith: 9781594036750: Amazon.com: Books
I would love to marry an American woman, especially my favorite lady with whom I have an excellent internet relationship with for the past 8 years or so.
Men in the US are not being disrespected by American women.
2nd to men?? Let me give you some statistics here and then tell me men are still 2nd to women in our society.American women are tired of being second to men at every turn.
Family law is there for the children and not for the dads. Usually it is the mother anyway who is taking care of the children even if both work.
Men have been ruling the roost for centuries and now only women are standing up for themselves and being counted and seen as equals to men. Not by some men but in general women have finally taken their rightful place in society.
And the men who are being told that they are worthless and stupid often are actually stupid and worthless. Women will no longer be reduced to being barefoot and pregnant slaves for their men.
They work almost as much outside of the house and do the house work and children duties on top of their out of the house work. Disrespecting men has not become the standard practice, what has become the standard practice is that women are equal to men and no longer will allow men to boss them around while they lie on the couch and bark out orders.
Men need to wise up and realize that they age of the rule of men is over, the age of equal men and women is here and now. Men have been stuck in their attitudes, that is why the weak bossy men of the past feel disrespected, treated like children and who feel that they are being targeted by the law, attitudes of women and the reality of 2014. And they are dropping out because of arrested development, men have a childish attitude to many things and in 2014 they have to become partners in a relationship and some men are just stuck in the past.
That's only when people rush to the altar and don't take the time to get to know their prospective mate. If you haven't known them for at least 5 years, you're doing it too fast.
I like that word much better when it comes to a relationship in general.
Okay, I understand your point better now. I still think that it is inaccurate though
That's not true. The balance is something that requires alot conscious effort and hard work. Relying on it to "fall naturally into place" means there is a lot of mind reading going on. Frankly, that never works. Communication works.
The problem here IMO, is that you see it as a challenge. A challenge to what exactly? Your dominance? In a partnership, where both are equal a disagreement with you does not mean your power is being challenged it means the women is requesting her needs be considered
Generalizations are dangerous
I like women with some sass, humor and quirkiness but also reasonable and intelligent. Beyond that, I'm not saying anymore, because honestly, life is a mess and we're all just doing the best we know how.
I think this is true of nearly everyone. I have never met any dominant person -- male or female -- who is dominant in everything, and has the stamina to be dominant all the time without break. Never.
I agree that it probably is a better word to use in general.
However, I would still maintain that, generally speaking, men are a bit more interpersonally assertive than women and that men and women alike tend to be more "dominant" in different aspects of their relationships.
Childrearing, for instance, is usually something over which a woman has a level of control with which men could not hope to compete. This is due to the maternal instincts by which women come naturally.
The same goes for most decisions pertaining to what happens within the household itself during a committed relationship. Women are so notorious for moving into a man's house and promptly rearranging everything, as a matter of fact, that it has honestly become a bit of a cliché. :lol:
Likewise, I think men tend to naturally be rather practical in terms of their mindset, and they are "wired" to serve as protectors and providers, so those are aspects of the relationship to which they most often gravitate.
This isn't universally the case, of course. Variation can be observed to exist for various reasons. However, it is the case more often than not in the vast majority of heterosexual relationships.
Hey, got a link to any that? :mrgreen:
The link between "dominant" behaviors and personality types and testosterone is pretty well studied.
In men, it is obvious.
Testosterone, Antisocial Behavior, and Social
Dominance in Boys: Pubertal Development and Biosocial Interaction
However, it can be observed in women as well.
Studies have actually shown that women with "dominant" personalities are more likely to have sons, specifically because they have so much more testosterone running through their systems than the average woman anyway.
Sex determination and the maternal dominance hypothesis
Simply put: More testosterone = more dominant personalities.
Guess what men have more of by nature? :shrug:
As far as "providing" goes, men have served that role for the vast majority of our species' history. Even today, they are still the primary bread winners in 70% of all households where two parents are actually present.
Testosterone and other hormones might make men more aggressive but not more dominant. Dominance would be strictly related to personality type. Look around! There are plenty of wimpy dudes around that are obviously not dominant over anything never mind another person.
You should read the articles. Heck! Just look at the titles of the articles. :lol:
Testosterone is linked to "dominant personalities" as well as aggressive behavior (which frankly shouldn't be surprising as the one generally leads to the other in the first place) in both men and women alike.
I don't think that's necessarily true. Not all men have a dominant personality, and some women have very dominant personalities. Think of all the nerds you went to school with. Do you think they are the dominant ones in their relationships?
Also, there are TONS of ways to dominate someone.
I mean, if what you said was true, then everyone would be living a traditional lifestyle. As you can see and have noted yourself, that is becoming less and less popular, as it usually requires two people to work and most couples share household chores and childcare.
I think a lot of "nerds" are probably more masculine than you're giving them credit for. :lol:
True, and I have already admitted as much.
As I said before, even a "submissive" woman can basically have a man at her mercy in a lot of ways if she plays her cards right.
Most people are living a more or less "traditional" life style, and always have. That's kind of the point.
Where they are not, women are not "taking control," by and large. They are simply splitting up and going it alone.
While there certainly are some very dominant women out there married to submissive men, they are pretty far from being the norm.
Huh? No, in most relationships nowadays both the man and woman work and they split household chores.
No one is "dominant." Why does someone HAVE to be dominant in the relationship? What's up with that crap?
The link between "dominant" behaviors and personality types and testosterone is pretty well studied.
In men, it is obvious.
Testosterone, Antisocial Behavior, and Social Dominance in Boys: Pubertal Development and Biosocial Interaction
However, it can be observed in women as well.
Studies have actually shown that women with "dominant" personalities are more likely to have sons, specifically because they have so much more testosterone running through their systems than the average woman.
Sex determination and the maternal dominance hypothesis
Simply put: More testosterone = more dominant personalities.
Guess what men have more of by nature? :shrug:
As far as "providing" goes, men have served that role for the vast majority of our species' history. Even today, they are still the primary bread winners in 70% of all households where two parents are actually present.
Meh, I disagree. IMO, if I like a person, I can work around those things I think. I don't need a MENSA candidate as long as it's a person I have things in common with, can laugh with and can have a reasonable conversation with.
In 70% of housholds where both parents are present, men are still the primary breadwinners. Frankly, this number is only even that high in the first place due to so many men being laid off during the Great Recession.
Most of the time when a woman is the "dominant" provider, she is a single mother.
:doh Do we really have to go back to square one with this, Chris? We're already established all of these things.
Substitute the word "more assertive" for "dominant" if you don't like the implications of the latter.
Again, it all depends on the parts of relationship you're looking at. Men tend to be more "dominant" in some areas, women in others.
This isn't true of all relationships, but it is true of most.