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Should I turn in my brother for food stamp fraud?

What should I do?

  • Turn in my brother and his sons.

    Votes: 2 4.8%

  • Turn in my brother, his sons, and store

    Votes: 4 9.5%

  • Turn in the store

    Votes: 20 47.6%

  • Do nothing at all.

    Votes: 16 38.1%
  • Total voters
    42
Cardinal said:
That's actually not what "blood is thicker than water" means. In fact it actually means the opposite.

" the full proverb is "The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb", and refers to relationships formed by choice are deeper than those that are forced by birth."

Blood is thicker than water - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

...and goes back to Roman times (at least) to imply that the blood spilled (and bled) among fellow soldiers is more significant than from whom you were born.
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Cherry pick much - you missed the first part in Wiki:

In modern society, the proverb "blood is thicker than water" is used to imply that family ties (blood) are always more important (thicker) than the ties you make among friends (water). It generally means that the bonds of family and common ancestry are stronger than the bonds between unrelated people (such as friendship).

The equivalent proverb in German (originally: Blut ist dicker als Wasser), first appeared in the medieval German beast epic Reinhart Fuchs (c. 1180 'Reynard the Fox') by Heinrich der Glîchezære, whose words in English read, 'Kin-blood is not spoilt by water.'
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I'll stick with the common usage, for which I was correct.
 
SgtRock said:
So what do you suggest I do?
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If I had a smart answer I would have given it to you by now.

That said, I think getting authorities involved is a bad idea.
 
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SgtRock said:
Here is the situation. My brother and his sons live in another state. My sister passed away this month from lung cancer. I traveled there for the funeral and to visit. When I got there i found my brother and two of his sons had not eaten for two days. So i went out and picked up some burgers. After they had eaten I took my brother and his sons in my rental car, none of them have a car, to buy groceries which I gladly paid for. On the way back they asked me to stop at a store so i did. They came out with beer and cigaretts. Well needless to say i was pissed. I asked, how can you afford beer and cigaretts but can't afford food. My brother responded "the store accepted his food stamp card for beer and smokes, isn't that cool" I said hell no its not cool. My brother and his adult sons are on food stamps. So what am I to do. Turn in my brother and his sons.
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Would I do it? Absolutely not. There are undoubtedly some things a family member could do that would lead me to report them to authorities, but food-stamp mis-use is hardly one of them.

Mind your own business.
 
ChrisL said:
I thought he said it's his BROTHER, though, not brother-in-law. I would think I would feel bad that they were obviously suffering after the loss of their mom/wife, and want to try to help them. Or at least try to get the kids some help. It sounds like this is a family that needs some counseling IMO.
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Yea-I'm confused too, b/c I was thinking it was BIL since his sister just died of lung cancer? It sounded intertwined.

Anyway no I would not turn them in, but that's just me. People's sins will eventually find them out. Talk to them about it, that way when they do get caught you can say 'hey, at least I warned you''.

Sorry about your sis's passing.
 
Simply insist beer and tobacco is no substitute for eating a balanced diet. Maybe you can suggest they buy multivitamins, along with their beer and tobacco.
 
SgtRock said:
So what do you suggest I do?
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If they are religious people, refer them to a local pastor for counseling. At least he should be getting those kids into counseling. They lost their mom, and that's not easy for young boys to deal with all by themselves with an obviously inattentive father who is wallowing in his own misery from what it sounds like.
 
SMTA said:
Cherry pick much - you missed the first part in Wiki:



I'll stick with the common usage, for which I was correct.
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The "common usage" is stupid. The original meaning actually makes more sense.

That said, I know better than to be the pedantic twat who insists on correcting everyone at every social gathering.
 
SgtRock said:
I did as you suggested before I left to come back home. However the program does not allow the purchase of beer and cigaretts. I love my brother and he is having a difficult time. I have helped him many times over the years. But I will not enable him. He is reaping what he sowed.
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I didn't even pay attention to the little fact that the program doesn't cover those purchases, my bad.

Then I would do as others have suggested and drop a dime on the store. If they did it for your brother, I'm sure they've done it for others.
 
SgtRock said:
You said always not me. Keep in mind my sister just died from lung cancer and my brother and his sons are are starving and using food stamp cards to by cigaretts.
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Sounds like it's THEIR choice to starve. We aren't talking little kids here.
 
From a logical perspective, I disagree that you protect family in this way. Do you agree with the law that says you can't use food stamps for such things? Would you turn a non-family person in for it? If the answer is yes to both of these, then it is hypocritical to make an exception for a family member. Please note: I think the penalties may be very steep for such fraud, especially considering that most eligible people are rather poor. I think this could have bearing as to whether one agrees with the law. You may want to look into this aspect.

I won't say how I would answer these questions, and I understand the emotions that cause us to be hypocrites. But, I cannot see any reasoned account under which to make the exception.

At the very least I would wait a couple weeks and then turn in the store. They are more at fault in this situation, IMO. However, there may be a small chance your family could get caught as a result of this store getting investigated.

Comment on family: My family does know how I think about these things, and a few of the younger ones are not the best citizens. They know to steer clear of me, and I am just fine with that.
 
SgtRock said:
I did as you suggested before I left to come back home. However the program does not allow the purchase of beer and cigaretts. I love my brother and he is having a difficult time. I have helped him many times over the years. But I will not enable him. He is reaping what he sowed.
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I didn't even think about that aspect, my bad.

Then I would suggest as others have and drop a dime on the store that sold it to them. If they did it for your brother, I'm sure they've done it for others.
 
ChrisL said:
I thought he said it's his BROTHER, though, not brother-in-law. I would think I would feel bad that they were obviously suffering after the loss of their mom/wife, and want to try to help them. Or at least try to get the kids some help. It sounds like this is a family that needs some counseling IMO.
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He is my brother. My sister passed this month. Not mother or wife. Sorry this is a bit confussing. My sisters passing has been extremely difficult for all of us. My brother has been on food stamps for a long time. His boys are 19 and 22. The store not only commited fraud but aslo sold beer to a minor. Anyway, other than talking to my brother and his sons about this and expressing my disapointment, I have not done anything else at this point.
 
Cardinal said:
That's a very helpful post. Thank you for contributing that. Not to switch topics midstream or anything, but have you considered a lucrative career in the fortune cookie industry?
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On one side...turn in your family.

On the opposite side...do nothing.



Turn in the store. The middle path.
 
Cardinal said:
The "common usage" is stupid. The original meaning actually makes more sense.

That said, I know better than to be the pedantic twat who insists on correcting everyone at every social gathering.
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Too late - your twatness has already plopped on the floor, just like a Baby Ruth.

baby ruth.jpg
 
KevinKohler said:
On one side...turn in your family.

On the opposite side...do nothing.

Turn in the store. The middle path.
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And how is SgtRock going to do that without sweeping up his family into the mix, oh Buddhist genius?
 
KevinKohler said:
On one side...turn in your family.

On the opposite side...do nothing.



Turn in the store. The middle path.
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How about trying to get the family some help first? I think that's a more middle of the road suggestion, although I would turn in the store too because what they are doing is illegal. You are not supposed to be able to buy tobacco and alcohol with food stamps as far as I know, but then these people will just turn around and sell their food stamps for half price in order to get their tobacco and alcohol because they are both quite addictive substances.
 
Dezaad said:
From a logical perspective, I disagree that you protect family in this way. Do you agree with the law that says you can't use food stamps for such things? Would you turn a non-family person in for it? If the answer is yes to both of these, then it is hypocritical to make an exception for a family member. Please note: I think the penalties may be very steep for such fraud, especially considering that most eligible people are rather poor. I think this could have bearing as to whether one agrees with the law. You may want to look into this aspect.

I won't say how I would answer these questions, and I understand the emotions that cause us to be hypocrites. But, I cannot see any reasoned account under which to make the exception.

At the very least I would wait a couple weeks and then turn in the store. They are more at fault in this situation, IMO. However, there may be a small chance your family could get caught as a result of this store getting investigated.

Comment on family: My family does know how I think about these things, and a few of the younger ones are not the best citizens. They know to steer clear of me, and I am just fine with that.
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Just a thought your post brought to mind . . . the enabling part . . . really, he doesn't even know if they DID take food stamps for that stuff. If his brother had just shelled out cash for food, why didn't he use them then? That's the question to ask. Why were they two days hungry? Were they? Did they use the food stamps in there? Or did they use cash?

As to reporting them, he knows nothing. He didn't see the store accept them. Didn't even see them use 'em. Imagine the call:

"My brother told me that XYZ store took food stamps from him to buy alcohol and cigarettes on Saturday."

"Yeah? Wow. Well, thanks for calling."
 
Dezaad said:
From a logical perspective, I disagree that you protect family in this way. Do you agree with the law that says you can't use food stamps for such things? Would you turn a non-family person in for it? If the answer is yes to both of these, then it is hypocritical to make an exception for a family member. Please note: I think the penalties may be very steep for such fraud, especially considering that most eligible people are rather poor. I think this could have bearing as to whether one agrees with the law. You may want to look into this aspect.

I won't say how I would answer these questions, and I understand the emotions that cause us to be hypocrites. But, I cannot see any reasoned account under which to make the exception.

At the very least I would wait a couple weeks and then turn in the store. They are more at fault in this situation, IMO. However, there may be a small chance your family could get caught as a result of this store getting investigated.

Comment on family: My family does know how I think about these things, and a few of the younger ones are not the best citizens. They know to steer clear of me, and I am just fine with that.
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I don't think it's hypocritical because it's only natural that you would care more about your family than some stranger and be more hesitant to turn in a family member, if you have any sense of family loyalty of course.
 
Cardinal said:
I think anyone would agree that a Baby Ruth is the best possible outcome of being a pedantic twat.
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You are obviously missing the Caddyshack reference - also too common for you?
 
Cardinal said:
And how is SgtRock going to do that without sweeping up his family into the mix, oh Buddhist genius?
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I guess you have a point there. If he turns in the store, chances are the authorities will find out that his brother has been using his food stamps to purchase tobacco and alcohol at this store.

Maybe that's Kevin's point though. Instead of just turning in your family, you turn in the store and inadvertently the family gets found out too?
 
SgtRock said:
Here is the situation. My brother and his sons live in another state. My sister passed away this month from lung cancer. I traveled there for the funeral and to visit. When I got there i found my brother and two of his sons had not eaten for two days. So i went out and picked up some burgers. After they had eaten I took my brother and his sons in my rental car, none of them have a car, to buy groceries which I gladly paid for. On the way back they asked me to stop at a store so i did. They came out with beer and cigaretts. Well needless to say i was pissed. I asked, how can you afford beer and cigaretts but can't afford food. My brother responded "the store accepted his food stamp card for beer and smokes, isn't that cool" I said hell no its not cool. My brother and his adult sons are on food stamps. So what am I to do. Turn in my brother and his sons.
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You do not want to turn in your brother...if you value family ties. Sooner or later, someone will. What he is "getting away with" won't last long, and the store will also be in trouble. Stay out of it would be my advice.

Greetings, SgtRock. :2wave:
 
SMTA said:
You are obviously missing the Caddyshack reference - also too common for you?
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No, I just don't remember every 80's reference.
 
SgtRock said:
Here is the situation. My brother and his sons live in another state. My sister passed away this month from lung cancer. I traveled there for the funeral and to visit. When I got there i found my brother and two of his sons had not eaten for two days. So i went out and picked up some burgers. After they had eaten I took my brother and his sons in my rental car, none of them have a car, to buy groceries which I gladly paid for. On the way back they asked me to stop at a store so i did. They came out with beer and cigaretts. Well needless to say i was pissed. I asked, how can you afford beer and cigaretts but can't afford food. My brother responded "the store accepted his food stamp card for beer and smokes, isn't that cool" I said hell no its not cool. My brother and his adult sons are on food stamps. So what am I to do. Turn in my brother and his sons.
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So let's take stock of all of this... your online name is SgtRock. You present an online persona of assertion, even aggressive chin-out stance. But when it comes time to USE that in the real world scenario you ask about doing the limp willie snitch routine? :doh

My brother lived in my grandmother's house after she went to 'the Home'. He never paid the bills, did a lot of drinking and a few drugs. Power turned off, my wife and I lost the half beef in the freezer. I calmly asked him about it, noticed the smoked stained walls and crappy remelt candles and then just beat his ass. Not a real beat down, he is my brother, but until he couldn't stand. I then drug him outside, told him he needed to find a new place to live.

Time to nut-up, family is family.
 
ChrisL said:
If they are religious people, refer them to a local pastor for counseling. At least he should be getting those kids into counseling. They lost their mom, and that's not easy for young boys to deal with all by themselves with an obviously inattentive father who is wallowing in his own misery from what it sounds like.
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Sorry, they are my brothets sons. They lost their aunt. My sister lived in the same city and was very close to them. Btw my sister has two sons who are devistated but doing better finacially.
 
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