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Bullying...

How are we doing at addressing bullying?

  • We're not doing enough.

    Votes: 26 43.3%

  • We're right on track and taking appropriate measures.

    Votes: 7 11.7%

  • We're blowing it way out of proportion.

    Votes: 20 33.3%

  • Other.

    Votes: 7 11.7%
  • Total voters
    60
Dapper Andy said:
I know everything has to be taken to an extreme on a political message board but is bloods fighting crips over turf really an example of bullying?
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The member I responded to raised gang and prison issues. Hence, my response. OKay? :) Read back.

When I originally referred to "gangs" I meant gangs of kids, although in many schools real gangs can be troublesome too.
 
It seems like there are some different views of what bullying is. It's often not just physical. In fact, physical bullying is likely rare compared with psychological and social bullying. Kids don't face a bully who wants to hit them, but rather bullies who single them out for derision and ostracizing. And as a kid faces that, every day, for years, they may become depressed, more likely to turn to drugs, or lose all confidence. They become damaged before they become adults. These kids can't fight back, they can't have the movie moment where they win a fistfight with the bully. They'll get in trouble for starting the physical fight.

It's a cliche, but a true one that bullies are often troubled themselves. Counseling, dealing with their problems at home, and making sure that their attacks on others aren't ignored are key to stopping the cycle. A lot of bullying likely comes from bad parenting, especially authoritarian parenting.
 
Captain Adverse said:
The member I responded to raised gang and prison issues. Hence, my response. OKay? :) Read back.

When I originally referred to "gangs" I meant gangs of kids, although in many schools real gangs can be troublesome too.
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I just think there is a big different between something that are serious and others that are relatively trivial.

"Gangs" of kids attacking the son you mentioned previously and severely hurting him is very serious but the daughter who had her feelings hurt is relatively trivial. I don't doubt being unpopular is no picnic but that's life.
 
Paschendale said:
It seems like there are some different views of what bullying is. It's often not just physical. In fact, physical bullying is likely rare compared with psychological and social bullying. Kids don't face a bully who wants to hit them, but rather bullies who single them out for derision and ostracizing. And as a kid faces that, every day, for years, they may become depressed, more likely to turn to drugs, or lose all confidence. They become damaged before they become adults. These kids can't fight back, they can't have the movie moment where they win a fistfight with the bully. They'll get in trouble for starting the physical fight.

It's a cliche, but a true one that bullies are often troubled themselves. Counseling, dealing with their problems at home, and making sure that their attacks on others aren't ignored are key to stopping the cycle. A lot of bullying likely comes from bad parenting, especially authoritarian parenting.
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and a lot of people have eggshell egos and consider anything not about how great they are "bullying". The train derailed on its own accord.
 
Dapper Andy said:
I just think there is a big different between something that are serious and others that are relatively trivial.

"Gangs" of kids attacking the son you mentioned previously and severely hurting him is very serious but the daughter who had her feelings hurt is relatively trivial. I don't doubt being unpopular is no picnic but that's life.
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You think so? Soooo taking pictures of her without her knowledge in a changing room or restroom in various states of undress or "indisposed" then posting them on the internet...not much of a deal huh? Or setting up a website focusing on her so that kids make fun as she tries to go to school? Then of course, sometimes it's more direct and violent. Girls these days can be quite fiesty and brutal in a physically aggressive way. Maybe you should watch "Carrie" only imagine it without the telekinisis, LOL ;)

Carrie3.preview.jpg
 
Discounting the "toughen up" aspect, and teaching kids to be hyper-sensitive, only serves to perpetuate the problem and it becomes self-sustaining in that it becomes always expanding.
 
Captain Adverse said:
You think so? Soooo taking pictures of her without her knowledge in a changing room or restroom in various states of undress or "indisposed" then posting them on the internet...not much of a deal huh? Or setting up a website focusing on her so that kids make fun as she tries to go to school? Then of course, sometimes it's more direct and violent. Girls these days can be quite fiesty and brutal in a physically aggressive way. Maybe you should watch "Carrie" only imagine it without the telekinisis, LOL ;)
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Yes.

Obviously when I said there are serious and trivial issues of bullying I meant sodomizing a kindergartner with an axe handle as something trivial.

:roll:
 
Captain Adverse said:
Not really. If I am a crip and 5 bloods see me? I can fight my ass off and they'll still gladly beat the crap out of me and spit on me too. Prison? Gangs respect power and they don't waste it on minor issues. So in there sometimes facing up works, in others not so much.

Now back the the real world...how do you handle a situation when some mean girls post embarassing things about your daughter on the internet...for millions to see? How do you handle your son getting a beat down so bad he almost loses an eye or suffers a broken bone? Tell him to go back so they can happily do it again? Back in the day I belonged to a teen gang, and unless it was a gang battle they pretty much let it be one on one. Now? Pssh, it's a gang beat-down.
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Well in the real world.....just cuz because one is affiliated with something doesn't mean they don't get respect. Reputation plays a part.

Also back in the real world.....anyone outside bangers is considered a peon. That's being locked up in prison too. So anytime a peon opens their mouth, or even looks like it can be gangstered. What do you think takes place.

So it is hardy a minor issue with those locked up. As for instance the GDs and The Vice Lords like to extort and play around with Homosexuals.....making them pay protection and pimping them out. Uhm that would be 2 different Gang Organizations known as the People and the Folks. That which the Bloods and Crips uncloak and ride with nationwide.
 
Dapper Andy said:
Yes.

Obviously when I said there are serious and trivial issues of bullying I meant sodomizing a kindergartner with an axe handle as something trivial.

:roll:
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I'm done talking to you. You're just trolling.
 
MMC said:
Well in the real world.....just cuz because one is affiliated with something doesn't mean they don't get respect. Reputation plays a part.

Also back in the real world.....anyone outside bangers is considered a peon. That's being locked up in prison too. So anytime a peon opens their mouth, or even looks like it can be gangstered. What do you think takes place.

So it is hardy a minor issue with those locked up. As for instance the GDs and The Vice Lords like to extort and play around with Homosexuals.....making them pay protection and pimping them out. Uhm that would be 2 different Gang Organizations known as the People and the Folks. That which the Bloods and Crips uncloak and ride with nationwide.
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I'm not talking about "gang-bangers" or "prison." There are enough cliques in school that bully kids without referencing "the big house" kind of props.

I spent some time as a teacher. I had no problem interrupting fights. I had a problem when I started noticing kids with knives at school. That it was gangs of friends (like those three older middle school kids who beat that younger kid up on a bus) who had no problem jumping on one guy. That girl gangs did the same thing. This wasn't like "Valley Girls."

I'm saying that it's important for kids to stand up for themselves, and even if the kid is bigger he'll respect you even if he wins if you face him down and get at least ONE good lick in. If that's all there was to bullying, no big deal. I'm just saying it's not always that simple anymore.
 
Bullying cannot be solved with "stand up to them". If it could, it would have been solved years ago. Bullying needs to be solved not with fists, but with a more psychological approach. We need to break through the thinking that being tougher means being better. That mentality not only hurts the victim of bullying, but the bully him or her self. Physical intimidation, which is the prime tool in a bullies box, does not solve any real problems ever.

We need to be teaching kids to respect one another, not to teach them to punch each other. That neanderthal like thinking simply has to go. All it does is treat a symptom, not the problem.
 
lizzie said:
As long as we teach children to be passive, bullying will increase in frequency and in severity.
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How about some kind of a school police? Because it's easy for one to bully younger an smaller kids (they are different fighting categories, to say the least).
If a bully is suspended for 15 days or fined 300 bucks that will make him(her?) think twice before the next bullying, imho.
Or may be 20 whips will do the job? :cool:
 
How can anyone think bullying is being blown out of proportion?

Anyway, we're not doing enough.
 
As with anything so broad, there are a number of potential responses that are reasonable. Some schools, some instructors in schools are absolutely fantastic in dealing with bullying. Others, no. In other environments, bullying is unpopular and shut down, whereas in other venues in life, it is not. There is some good turn around with the mentality toward bullying. It is more unpopular for people to be okay with someone being a bully. It is more unpopular for people to use online communication in order to bully (it still happens frequently, of course). We have more states taking action against bullying (all with proper caveats in the language of the legislation being strong or weak).
 
Canell said:
How about some kind of a school police? Because it's easy for one to bully younger an smaller kids (they are different fighting categories, to say the least).
If a bully is suspended for 15 days or fined 300 bucks that will make him(her?) think twice before the next bullying, imho.
Or may be 20 whips will do the job? :cool:
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I'm not sure that would do much more than piss the average bully off. Next time instead of facing the kid at school it might be on the way home where no one can see.
 
Captain Adverse said:
That's what my dad taught me. It used to work too, if you had the guts to stand up for yourself and face your bully.

Problem is, times have changed. Used to be a one-on-one situation, and even if you lost you still got credit for standing up and most bullies stopped bothering you. Today 3 to ten people will jump on one kid and do a beat down. Then youtube it. Maybe it needs to be addressed today more than it did back in the old days.
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Heck, another problem is that sometimes when someone fights back with even more power than what you describe (a more than one person physical response), you actually get even more pushback from the bullies and the school population. When kids and their parents use the legal system to fight back, it can work against the student.

That's why I thought the stand-up to the bully mantra foolish. Even if you play the bully's game in using disproportionate force (but legal force) against the bully, the masses retaliate and make them even more isolated. Despite that, when able to, heck yes, I would encourage the use of legal force against those punks.
 
Captain Adverse said:
I'm not talking about "gang-bangers" or "prison." There are enough cliques in school that bully kids without referencing "the big house" kind of props.

I spent some time as a teacher. I had no problem interrupting fights. I had a problem when I started noticing kids with knives at school. That it was gangs of friends (like those three older middle school kids who beat that younger kid up on a bus) who had no problem jumping on one guy. That girl gangs did the same thing. This wasn't like "Valley Girls."

I'm saying that it's important for kids to stand up for themselves, and even if the kid is bigger he'll respect you even if he wins if you face him down and get at least ONE good lick in. If that's all there was to bullying, no big deal. I'm just saying it's not always that simple anymore.
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Yeah well that's how it plays out here in CPS schools.....I don't have to look at the Big house. Course here the gangs are looked upon moreso than just cliques. As someone is or has some association to one or another.

But you are Right as there have been gangs of girls out messing with people to. Usually older tho. But some have jumped guys too. Or moreso out in the suburbs with the hazing incidents.

Like you I think standing up for themselves is the way to go. But then again you brought up about someone using the computer to bully a daughter. People going round thru technology. They even have a commercial about aggressive texting. So it does get a bit more complicated.
 
Fisher said:
In case you have not noticed, the Anti-Bullying campaign is a pro-gay rights campaign in disguise. Every now and then they will throw in a non-white face to make it seem like it isn't what it is, but in the end, that is all it is.
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Some of it yes. But most of the time, it's a defense of the minority-any minority campaign. Any person that has been taught to feel like crap simply for existing and liking something others don't, is represented.
 
Fiddytree said:
Some of it yes. But most of the time, it's a defense of the minority-any minority campaign. Any person that has been taught to feel like crap simply for existing and liking something others don't, is represented.
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so it is about protecting Christians and conservatives from the progressive caucus? Who knew....
 
lizzie said:
As long as we teach children to be passive, bullying will increase in frequency and in severity.
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So what exactly are you suggesting?
 
Fisher said:
so it is about protecting Christians and conservatives from the progressive caucus? Who knew....
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If they are in a situation in which a gang of atheists, or an atheist and/or liberal dominated school goes out and berates students to that extent? Yes. On the other hand, it might be so that if that population you so describe represents the majority of the school norm, then no, you're looking at the likelihood of that being less.

It's a numbers and culture thing.
 
radcen said:
They ARE the bullies. ;)
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stop bullying me by accusing me of being a bully, you bully!!

:lol: and that is why the train derailed......
 
Captain Adverse said:
Not really. If I am a crip and 5 bloods see me? I can fight my ass off and they'll still gladly beat the crap out of me and spit on me too. Prison? Gangs respect power and they don't waste it on minor issues. So in there sometimes facing up works, in others not so much.

Now back the the real world...how do you handle a situation when some mean girls post embarassing things about your daughter on the internet...for millions to see? How do you handle your son getting a beat down so bad he almost loses an eye or suffers a broken bone? Tell him to go back so they can happily do it again? Back in the day I belonged to a teen gang, and unless it was a gang battle they pretty much let it be one on one. Now? Pssh, it's a gang beat-down.
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Gang violence is hardly new.
 
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