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How often do you “shoot the messenger?”

blackjack50

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So being in the insurance industry I deal with this a lot. A lot of times there is absolutely NOTHING that can be done for you by the person in front of you. They don’t write the policies. They just inform you of them. And if they try to break policy...they lose their job. Since I started in the insurance industry I’ve tried to be more cognizant of that. I can honestly say it HAS helped in some of my negotiations with apartments and stuff. But I still slip up (the DMV was tough and I got on to a guy behind the counter but he told me incorrect information the last time I was in causing me to waste my time and then he handed my information to the wrong person who I had to stop from driving out of the parking lot...ugh). Needless to say I was little sour when I found out I didn’t quite have the right information I needed 2nd trip around (or that the information I hasn’t in the right format). I shot the messenger a little bit.

So. Just out of curiosity...do you find yourself shooting the messenger frequently? Are there certain times where you can’t help it? Why?



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I don’t think I ever do that. If I ever find myself acting frustrated with an employee over something that isn’t their fault I will usually caveat my frustration with something like, “Look, I know this isn’t your fault”. That way they know I am just venting and not to take it personally. But I think it is still good for employees to see that frustration. If it happens enough it might make its way up the chain and cause a change to stupid policy. Though I am sure that usually it doesn’t.
 
I’m frontline hotelier management, I can get shot multiple times on the daily.

Luckily, for the most part the last couple of jobs have given me broad authority to solve an issue in any way, using whatever methods or incentives I see fit when it comes to issues with customers but other industries/jobs don’t have that kind of leeway so I’m cogniscent of that when I’m dealing with representatives of whatever.

However if you’re being overtly seemingly unhelpful or dismissive that can boil anyone’s blood.
 
If the episode goes south, I’ll try to let the rep know that my problem is not with them personally. I will also ask if there is a supervisor that I can address the issue with. To the OP, I was in the auto repair business for a while and we had an adjuster who acted as though the check was being drawn on his account.......
 
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I don’t think I ever do that. If I ever find myself acting frustrated with an employee over something that isn’t their fault I will usually caveat my frustration with something like, “Look, I know this isn’t your fault”. That way they know I am just venting and not to take it personally. But I think it is still good for employees to see that frustration. If it happens enough it might make its way up the chain and cause a change to stupid policy. Though I am sure that usually it doesn’t.

I have found the supervisor is usually the only one who cares enough to change a policy. And has the ability to get the information to where it goes. Don’t bother with a complaint line lol. I HATE when customers ask for it...because they waste their time there.

Honestly...the best place to get a response on stupid policies now...is Twitter.


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If the episode goes south, I’ll try to let the rep know that my problem is not with them personally. I will als ask if there is a supervisor that I can address the issue with. To the OP, I was in the auto repair business for a while and we had an adjuster who acted as though the check was being drawn on his account.......

Friggin insurance man. We have people like that here. Kill me. I’m short time. I am waiting to go back into education. I enjoyed working with even ****ty asshole kids. I don’t like ****ty asshole adults. I can deal with both, but at least one has an excuse.


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So being in the insurance industry I deal with this a lot. A lot of times there is absolutely NOTHING that can be done for you by the person in front of you. They don’t write the policies. They just inform you of them. And if they try to break policy...they lose their job. Since I started in the insurance industry I’ve tried to be more cognizant of that. I can honestly say it HAS helped in some of my negotiations with apartments and stuff. But I still slip up (the DMV was tough and I got on to a guy behind the counter but he told me incorrect information the last time I was in causing me to waste my time and then he handed my information to the wrong person who I had to stop from driving out of the parking lot...ugh). Needless to say I was little sour when I found out I didn’t quite have the right information I needed 2nd trip around (or that the information I hasn’t in the right format). I shot the messenger a little bit.

So. Just out of curiosity...do you find yourself shooting the messenger frequently? Are there certain times where you can’t help it? Why?



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What you described wasn't shooting the messenger. He actually screwed up, so chastising him for it is appropriate. As laong as your response was appropriate to the offense.;)
 
What you described wasn't shooting the messenger. He actually screwed up, so chastising him for it is appropriate. As laong as your response was appropriate to the offense.;)

I realize now I didn’t put enough in. I was a little rude to others there. Short maybe. Not just him.


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So being in the insurance industry I deal with this a lot. A lot of times there is absolutely NOTHING that can be done for you by the person in front of you. They don’t write the policies. They just inform you of them. And if they try to break policy...they lose their job. Since I started in the insurance industry I’ve tried to be more cognizant of that. I can honestly say it HAS helped in some of my negotiations with apartments and stuff. But I still slip up (the DMV was tough and I got on to a guy behind the counter but he told me incorrect information the last time I was in causing me to waste my time and then he handed my information to the wrong person who I had to stop from driving out of the parking lot...ugh). Needless to say I was little sour when I found out I didn’t quite have the right information I needed 2nd trip around (or that the information I hasn’t in the right format). I shot the messenger a little bit.

So. Just out of curiosity...do you find yourself shooting the messenger frequently? Are there certain times where you can’t help it? Why?



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I usually shoot the messenger first ... and decide later on whether resuscitation is justified. :lol:
 
I'm guilty of acting like an asshole.
I don't do it all the time, or even A LOT, but sure, I've regretted the way I've treated people at the front of house from time to time.

Not proud of doing it...ever. But I've done it alright.
I have also been on the receiving end of it.
 
So being in the insurance industry I deal with this a lot. A lot of times there is absolutely NOTHING that can be done for you by the person in front of you. They don’t write the policies. They just inform you of them. And if they try to break policy...they lose their job. Since I started in the insurance industry I’ve tried to be more cognizant of that. I can honestly say it HAS helped in some of my negotiations with apartments and stuff. But I still slip up (the DMV was tough and I got on to a guy behind the counter but he told me incorrect information the last time I was in causing me to waste my time and then he handed my information to the wrong person who I had to stop from driving out of the parking lot...ugh). Needless to say I was little sour when I found out I didn’t quite have the right information I needed 2nd trip around (or that the information I hasn’t in the right format). I shot the messenger a little bit.

So. Just out of curiosity...do you find yourself shooting the messenger frequently? Are there certain times where you can’t help it? Why?



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Fortunately one of the companies under our umbrella is Colonial Penn, you could be dying tomorrow and get accepted on that. It's also a good idea to find some accidental death and dismemberment certificates that you can give away for free. I have like a couple hundred 1,000 certificates that are legite, buy em in bulk by the pack for 50 bucks. So when I can't help them on medical or with their finances, or get them a decent life insurance policy. I throw out the certificates and colonial penn.
 
So being in the insurance industry I deal with this a lot. A lot of times there is absolutely NOTHING that can be done for you by the person in front of you. They don’t write the policies. They just inform you of them. And if they try to break policy...they lose their job. Since I started in the insurance industry I’ve tried to be more cognizant of that. I can honestly say it HAS helped in some of my negotiations with apartments and stuff. But I still slip up (the DMV was tough and I got on to a guy behind the counter but he told me incorrect information the last time I was in causing me to waste my time and then he handed my information to the wrong person who I had to stop from driving out of the parking lot...ugh). Needless to say I was little sour when I found out I didn’t quite have the right information I needed 2nd trip around (or that the information I hasn’t in the right format). I shot the messenger a little bit.

So. Just out of curiosity...do you find yourself shooting the messenger frequently? Are there certain times where you can’t help it? Why?



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk



A long time ago in a world far, far away I was a practicing alcoholic and all messengers were shot simply for being ****ing messengers. Fortunately I found sobriety and have learned to be as kind as possible, as MY attitude will often shape results.

I do not so it to reshape results, I do it to maintain my sobriety through at least a nod to serenity. No, the person in front of you probably can't do much, but often they can. Take the example of two local stores. I bought socks at one, and as usual simply stripped them of their packaging and put them in a drawer only to discover a week later they were mis-labled and too small.

The young man on duty refused to make an exchange because it had been too long and the packaging was gone did the worst ****ing thing you can do in customer relations and cited "policy"...a word resembling "police"


OK, "thank you for your time" and I left with my mis sized socks which were quickly distributed to some street people. From there it was off to store number two...where a year ago last fall I went in to buy new winter boots. They were out of the ones in my size for the style I wanted. But the woman on duty decided to sell me a different style worth $80 more for the same price. Why? Because we had had a chat about pain management and her father, like me suffers from migraines.

On this trip though I only bought socks and will be buying all my socks, shoes etc. at that store from now on.

In this tale of two stores can anyone she who was the asshole?
 
A long time ago in a world far, far away I was a practicing alcoholic and all messengers were shot simply for being ****ing messengers. Fortunately I found sobriety and have learned to be as kind as possible, as MY attitude will often shape results.

I do not so it to reshape results, I do it to maintain my sobriety through at least a nod to serenity. No, the person in front of you probably can't do much, but often they can. Take the example of two local stores. I bought socks at one, and as usual simply stripped them of their packaging and put them in a drawer only to discover a week later they were mis-labled and too small.

The young man on duty refused to make an exchange because it had been too long and the packaging was gone did the worst ****ing thing you can do in customer relations and cited "policy"...a word resembling "police"


OK, "thank you for your time" and I left with my mis sized socks which were quickly distributed to some street people. From there it was off to store number two...where a year ago last fall I went in to buy new winter boots. They were out of the ones in my size for the style I wanted. But the woman on duty decided to sell me a different style worth $80 more for the same price. Why? Because we had had a chat about pain management and her father, like me suffers from migraines.

On this trip though I only bought socks and will be buying all my socks, shoes etc. at that store from now on.

In this tale of two stores can anyone she who was the asshole?

I don't blame employees for using "policy" as an argument. I get customers asking for ridiculous **** all the time, although I only pull the "policy" excuse as a last resort after offering alternatives and then the customer still rejects them.
 
I don't blame employees for using "policy" as an argument. I get customers asking for ridiculous **** all the time, although I only pull the "policy" excuse as a last resort after offering alternatives and then the customer still rejects them.

I detest the policy argument myself. But only when the policy doesn’t make sense.


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When I've run into the proverbial wall I always go for the one who passed the message: the manager. If the manager starts drooling as well, I turn and walk out.
 
I mainly only get agitated when situations are extremely stupid...

1) I was on vacation and looked online for a cheap hotel/motel to stay at for the night. The website I was (hotels.com? I don't remember) was advertising the room for like $79? for a night. I walk in and they try telling me that it would be over $100 for that night. I was like wtf, and I went back to my car and got my phone, and pulled it up online and then walked in and showed him on my phone the price that was quoted online. They still didn't want to give me that rate (I think they said it was quoted at the wrong rate?), so I then got a little agitated and told them "I could just stand right here and press this button and I would have a room at the $79 rate." They were still snobby towards me about it, but they finally did give me a room at that rate and were acting like they were giving me a huge deal and going out of their way to do that. Like, that's what you friggin advertised you dumb butts... And if your ad was wrong, that's not my problem...

2) I was shopping at Costco with my dad (he's a member and I am not). We get to the check out person, and my dad didn't quite have enough money on him, so I was going to hand it to the guy and he wasn't going to accept it because I'm not a Costco member. My dad basically told him "it's cash, what difference does it make who hands it to you." The guy did accept it then, but like REALLY? I'm supposed to hand my cash to my dad and then he hands it to the check out guy instead of me directly handing it to the check out guy?

I swear this world has little to no common sense anymore...
 
I did get agitated once when I was buying books at the college bookstore for my upcoming classes that semester. I handed the check out lady cash (a bunch of $20s with one $50 mixed in) and she kept telling me that I was short, and I kept telling her that I wasn't. I finally lost my cool and counted it out in front of her to prove that I indeed was not short. I heard some comment from (I think another check out person) saying something along the lines that I should give her a break or that "it happens" or something along those lines, and ignored it. Yes, I was getting agitated and was probably a bit rude, but if you can't count properly because a $50 is mixed in with $20s (most people would either set aside the $50 until they're done counting the $20, or if they are better with math like I am, they would just switch it over to 70, 90, 110, 130, 150, etc., but this lady couldn't handle doing either of those things...), then you shouldn't be working at a cash register or doing any work that involves counting money...

Another time, my dad and I were shopping at Menards and we were already in line, and were the only other people in line, but the check out person just suddenly turned off their check out lane light after checking out the people in front of us, and before checking us out, and refused to check us out because they "turned their light off". We both thought that was awfully ****ty service (why couldn't they just quickly check us out and THEN be done, I mean, we were ALREADY in line for a few minutes), so we both left our items sit right there and walked right out of the store.
 
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I always give them a chance to resolve my issue, and I get that not everything is easy, quick, or possible.

However.

The second I get attitude, or an unwillingness to help, all bets are off. If you don't want to provide customer service, don't get into it as a job.

Sadly, you have to be tough, as there are so many ways you can get screwed over in this life. I tend to go for fair over nice. Fair allows you to reward good service with a good response, even if in a bad situation. It also lets you rip new assholes in response to someone trying to screw you over, or who is simply too uninterested to put in the effort to resolve your complaint. Be fair with me, I'll be fair with you.
 
I shot the mirror this morning because it offended me. That's the last time that mirror will pull a stunt like that.
 
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