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Cannibalophobia runs rampant in Eastern Europe[W:9]

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Natan

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People in the Czech Republic know very little about cannibals and are still extremely prejudiced. There is downright cannibalophobia. Even the most peaceful cannibal is depicted as a bloodthirsty beast. This dehumanized image is often presented by social media. But we should not lump all cannibals together. Most cannibals are in fact decent, peace-loving people. They do not eat you on the street and at home they don't cook small children. We must be able to distinguish between cannibalism as a faith and cannibalism as a militant, political ideology. We bring our readers an interview with Jan Keutel, the leading expert in the field of cannibalism, a traveler and adventurer, all in one person.

Good day Mr. Keutel. The majority of Czechs have no personal experience with cannibals. Yet their attitude is at best reserved, but usually pronouncedly hostile. How do you assess the situation?


Hello Mr. editor. Yes, that is true. Most Czechs have no personal experience with cannibals, they know nothing about their way of life and yet we are dealing with an inexplicable aversion to this group. People often imagine a cannibal as a bloodthirsty beast. In the media the biggest nonsense may appear, which is directly and uncritically taken over by people and spread through social media. It is the fault of the media that they do not spread enough positive news.

We can therefore conclude that the cannibals are friendly and peaceful?

Yes. In my travels throughout the world, I have met these people often. You'd be surprised how nice and helpful they are. They take kindly to their family, they offer you tea and often soup, which tastes delicious by the way. They are very kind people. Many of my friends are cannibals.

An average person imagines a cannibal as someone who eats human flesh. Is that really so?

The question is not posed well, Mr. editor. The cannibal is just like all other people: he also has his own worries, feelings, desires and needs. Cannibals are loving parents and they take good care of their children. And they also have their own faith. We can not deny them the right to their religion and we must respect them as they are, with all their habits.

Mr. Keutel, this of course applies to their homeland. But as they move toward us, would they not have to change their habits?

Yes, we often hear such views. But I think we should not see think as much in terms of black and white. The average moderate cannibal doesn't want to harm you. They are basically good people. However, it is necessary to respect their habits. And let's face it, why should one really be upset about missing one toe if it is in the interest of a good thing, to be a society at peace with this group? Yes, radical cannibalism is another matter ...

Here I have to interrupt you. Do you really believe that we should sacrifice a limb in order to live in peace?

No, you don't understand me properly. Everything would of course be voluntary. A moderate cannibal will not harm you. And I am convinced that there are plenty of good, helpful people among us that will seize the opportunity to do a good deed and will provide on their own accord some of their - for them unnecessary - body parts. And there are certainly people who will consider leaving this world as a great end to their joyful life on this planet.

Come on Mr. Keutel, I find that shocking. This goes beyond my imagination ...

Mr. Editor, this happens in the real world. I can understand that: from the viewpoint of a Czech, who never left the Czech valley or whose farthest trip was to Croatia, this may sound strange to the ears, but there are countries where such a loving society is very common. Cannibals live for many, many years in symbiosis with other cultures, and they enrich each other.

Well Mr. Keutel, let's go back to the topic that you have already touched on: what is your opinion of radical cannibalism?

Yes, that is huge problem. It's basically about not understanding and abusing the originally peaceful spirit of cannibalism. Radical cannibals rob mainly non-cannibals and eat them in bloody feasts. But they also attack the other, moderate, cannibals.

(Part 1 of 2)
 
Re: Cannibalophobia runs rampant in Eastern Europe

(Part 2 of 2)

And isn't that strange? Can you explain why one group of cannibals mugs and eats the other group of cannibals?

First, we must realize that cannibalism is not monolithic. There are many cannibalistic tendencies. While the moderates understand that human sacrifices and daily feasts are not necessary to attain enlightenment, the radicals abuse the peaceful thoughts of cannibalism in order to come to power and rule. They have created a doctrine in which only the daily consumption of victims is the only good way. And every cannibal who refuses to kill is a heretic to them and deserves to be eaten first. Yes, radical cannibalism IS a major problem in the world.

So ... how would you assess the situation of recent years?

The situation is very complicated. Radical cannibalism, which in recent years has become widespread, has forced many peaceful cannibals to leave their home. The West would have to help them by taking them in without conditions and prejudices. And we have to go after the militant radical cannibals with a consistent and substantial approach, including military intervention. Unfortunately, we still come across xenophobic and racist sentiments against in society.

So you say: take in the cannibals?

Certainly. As civilized people, we have a duty to help, and that includes respecting the religious freedom of the cannibals. After all, they can be a huge asset to the economy. And the chief-cannibal knows how to call his cannibal subjects to order. He enjoys tremendous respect from them and is a natural authority.

Mr Keutel, but how should we deal with the fact that eating even a part of human body is forbidden by our legal system?

What you say is not entirely correct. That is a myth. Our law forbids murder, of course, and that's perfectly understandable. Something like involuntary removal of, for example, a finger, is not permitted. But there is much room for voluntary action. Therefore, one should start as soon as possible with the discussion of euthanasia. I also see a lot of room for voluntary donations. We feel secure as humane and helpful people and are sure to find a common path acceptable for all. It is even our duty.

One last question Mr. Keutel. Are not you afraid of the expansion of radical cannibalism in Europe or possibly of the conversion of moderate cannibals into radicals?

I do not think that this is likely. They are nice people and they want to live in peace, in accordance with their culture and customs. They will be thankful for any help from us.

Thank you for the interview and I hope it will be possible for you to once again meet our readers in the future.

I also thank you and goodbye.

(Note: This is a parody of an alternate reality. Any resemblance to living persons is purely coincidental. Whoever has not understood this and looking for something else behind this, is hopelessly lost..)
 
Re: Cannibalophobia runs rampant in Eastern Europe

Which Cannibals have entered Europe? Which population is that? Syrians?!

Or is this a joke/parody?
 
Re: Cannibalophobia runs rampant in Eastern Europe

oh i get it the cannibals are muslims..... that took me a second
 
Re: Cannibalophobia runs rampant in Eastern Europe

You would be scared too, if you thought you tasted as good as the Czechs think they do.
 
Re: Cannibalophobia runs rampant in Eastern Europe

Which Cannibals have entered Europe? Which population is that? Syrians?!

Or is this a joke/parody?

Not at all. It is the race of the Cannibals.
 
Re: Cannibalophobia runs rampant in Eastern Europe

oh i get it the cannibals are muslims..... that took me a second

Didn't you know? But they pick it up on their way through Turkey.
 
Re: Cannibalophobia runs rampant in Eastern Europe

Which Cannibals have entered Europe? Which population is that? Syrians?!

Or is this a joke/parody?
(Note: This is a parody of an alternate reality. Any resemblance to living persons is purely coincidental. Whoever has not understood this and looking for something else behind this, is hopelessly lost..
 
Re: Cannibalophobia runs rampant in Eastern Europe

Moderator's Warning:
Moved to philosophical forums as it is more appropriate here. Stick to the topic, and Natan's posts mentioned nothing of Muslims. Any inference to it is purely from other posters and not Natan's.
 
Re: Cannibalophobia runs rampant in Eastern Europe

Two cannibals kidnapped a clown and as they were eating him one said to the other "Does this taste funny to you?"
 
Re: Cannibalophobia runs rampant in Eastern Europe

(Note: This is a parody of an alternate reality. Any resemblance to living persons is purely coincidental. Whoever has not understood this and looking for something else behind this, is hopelessly lost..

no its not a coincidence you purposefully made this to insult muslims

I actually thought this was a really nuanced peice about some form of cannibalophobia in eastern europe that i had just never heard of before, maybe due to something about vlad the impaler or elizabeth bathory, or maybe something i dont about and how some tribes do practice forms of peaceful cannibalism, but no, just more xenophobic drivel that could just as well be used against the jews, the mexicans, or any immigrant really

nice try though hope you didn't spend too much time writing that crap:roll:
 
Re: Cannibalophobia runs rampant in Eastern Europe

I am inferring muslims. While the forum location is arguable, I do believe it fits within European politics. Perhaps in parody form, it better illustrates the nature of the problem with recent immigration policy. Islam, just as cannibalism, is not culturally compatible with us. The pretense of do-gooders that moderate muslims/cannibals are somehow not a problem and therefore all should be let in, is blatantly false.
 
Re: Cannibalophobia runs rampant in Eastern Europe

no its not a coincidence you purposefully made this to insult muslims
Why does this insult muslims? There is nothing either in the Holy Koran or in the Hadiths that says whether human meat is halal or haram.

You on the other hand are the devil, with 666 posts at time of writing.
 
Re: Cannibalophobia runs rampant in Eastern Europe

You on the other hand are the devil, with 666 posts at time of writing.

your damn right Im the devil, and since your location is hell, that means I am your lord and master, now fetch me my slippers
 
Re: Cannibalophobia runs rampant in Eastern Europe

Here you go, my lord and master, satan's slippers.

Puffball-Slippers-Pink_E9C684B4.jpg
 
Re: Cannibalophobia runs rampant in Eastern Europe

Here you go, my lord and master, satan's slippers.

Puffball-Slippers-Pink_E9C684B4.jpg

you dare and mock the lord with these pink and furry things? everyone knows satans slippers look like this

11123851_1566529736943088_1971303732_n.jpg
 
People in the Czech Republic know very little about cannibals and are still extremely prejudiced. There is downright cannibalophobia. Even the most peaceful cannibal is depicted as a bloodthirsty beast. This dehumanized image is often presented by social media. But we should not lump all cannibals together. Most cannibals are in fact decent, peace-loving people. They do not eat you on the street and at home they don't cook small children. We must be able to distinguish between cannibalism as a faith and cannibalism as a militant, political ideology. We bring our readers an interview with Jan Keutel, the leading expert in the field of cannibalism, a traveler and adventurer, all in one person.

Good day Mr. Keutel.




I'm one of those who think so - a cannibal is someone who eats human flesh. UNLESS, they've changed that definition, too.


An average person imagines a cannibal as someone who eats human flesh. Is that really so?

The question is not posed well, Mr. editor. The cannibal is just like all other people: he also has his own worries, feelings, desires and needs. Cannibals are loving parents and they take good care of their children. And they also have their own faith. We can not deny them the right to their religion and we must respect them as they are, with all their habits.




He didn't answer the question, did he? A serial killer also can be all that.


Note: I just read post #2. It's a parody!
 
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Re: Cannibalophobia runs rampant in Eastern Europe

LOL 5 star thread :lamo
 
Re: Cannibalophobia runs rampant in Eastern Europe

Moderator's Warning:
Closed for review due to new evidence
 
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