The military is an armed force of the state that the society establishes to protect it and to defend it as necessary. That is why in a democracy there is civilian control of the military armed force.
It's civil-military relations 101.
The armed forces must be prepared to fight in war. To be prepared and to fight effectively and victoriously the military has a code. The code includes discipline, good order, a system of rank, hierarchy, a subordinate-superordinate relationship, courage, honor, duty; chain of command and a rigorous system of military justice. Your duty is to the code of the society, ie, a constitution. You are trained and prepared to kill the armed enemy to protect it, defend it, preserve it -- against all enemies foreign and domestic.
Your mindset down under on your islands is that the military are confused and don't know the nature of the beast that it is. Yet you fail to recognize the differences between civilian courage and military courage. You fail to acknowledge the differences between civilian and military honor, commitment, service, discipline and so on. No one said civilians don't possess or practice these values. Civilians however have a radically different command and practice of these values, and necessarily so.
Civil-military relations reveal the difference between, say, a police officer and a soldier. A firefighter and a sailor. A Delta Airlines pilot and a pilot in the cockpit of an F-16 Fighting Falcon Viper of the USAF. A mayor and your colonel. We're talking common jobs in many instances that are however radically different in the nature of each. And we're talking about completely different jobs and values; manner of living and dying.
Your problem is that you're on your islands down there near Antarctica with a couple of million people trying to play with the big boys in the real world up here. That is, your mindset is isolated and small because that's what your life's experience is. You need to allow for that but you do not. The reason is that you don't recognize or cannot accept the difference.