3leftsdoo
DP Veteran
- Joined
- Mar 21, 2019
- Messages
- 18,105
- Reaction score
- 5,175
- Gender
- Undisclosed
- Political Leaning
- Undisclosed
Tulsi "I'll Be Back" Gabbard - Excluded by ludicrous Democrat rules designed to advance only the most successful fellators of the plutocracy, she won the debate in absentia by just being Tulsi. You go, girlfriend!
Joe "Uncle Touchy" Biden - Had a couple of human moments, but is clearly too frail and addled (and in the bag for the plutocracy) to do the job. Don't call attention to this or you are a meanie, however!
"Lickspittle" Lizzie Warren - Laid low for the most part. Made a joke about teaching her dolls & waited for a laugh that never came. Won't let us forget that she was poor once, dammit! She feels our pain, but also knows how to sneer at us when cocktails are being served in Democrat back rooms. Of course, she'll go get her a beer being so blue collar & all.
"Badass" Bernie Sanders - Ate some bad shellfish beforehand & it made him extra cranky. May need to meditate before the next debate...
Kamala "Hillary 2.0" Harris - A fascinating mix of fake folksy & Mommie Dearest sincere. The clown from It has more integrity and warmth. She'll be too old to run again in 27 years, so cross her off the list, especially as "Lickspittle" Lizzie is now charming the back room brokers with her "Don't believe anything I tell the rubes!" shtick.
"Blank Stare" Pete Buttigieg - His revealing moment came early on when he appeared constipated in response to Andy "UBI Candy" Yang's hilarious offer of cash for votes in the opening. Possessed of the fastest reptilian brain of the lot, Mayor Pete is a rising star in the Democrat Party as the best plutocrat Trojan Horse since Obama, but won't get to the White House this time around.
Cory "Clean, Articulate & Bright" Booker - Even Cory has a hard time taking himself seriously at this point. Once the brightest rising star in the Democrat Party, he's been eclipsed by "Blank Stare" Pete as a more ruthless aspirant to the puppet power of the bully pulpit.
Julián "Rico Suave" Castro - His memorable moment came when he allegedly picked on a poor confused old man who had wandered onstage & found himself at the center spot on the podium. Tied for creepiest remaining candidate with Harris.
Amy "Dry Drunk" Klobuchar - Her dad was an alcoholic, and dammit she KNOWS what pain feels like! Pain hurts, and when she's screaming at her staff, she thinks warmly of her dad, and how she's not a degenerate drunk (who ultimately found salvation!) like he was.
Beto "Oh Yes I WILL Take Your Gun!" O’Rourke - He puts the cringe in cringeworthy. Makes Sulu scream "Butch it up you little b*tch!!!" at the TV screen. If "Lickspittle" Lizzie is the class snitch, Beto is the class whipping boy. Completely clueless, and completely spineless.
Andy "UBI Candy" Yang - Oh dear heavens. Just too funny. The Democrat version of Trump, but nicer. Answers honestly and from the heart and hip. Way too sane and human to go much further.
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How do YOU rank the candidates from last night???
Joe "Uncle Touchy" Biden - Had a couple of human moments, but is clearly too frail and addled (and in the bag for the plutocracy) to do the job. Don't call attention to this or you are a meanie, however!
"Lickspittle" Lizzie Warren - Laid low for the most part. Made a joke about teaching her dolls & waited for a laugh that never came. Won't let us forget that she was poor once, dammit! She feels our pain, but also knows how to sneer at us when cocktails are being served in Democrat back rooms. Of course, she'll go get her a beer being so blue collar & all.
"Badass" Bernie Sanders - Ate some bad shellfish beforehand & it made him extra cranky. May need to meditate before the next debate...
Kamala "Hillary 2.0" Harris - A fascinating mix of fake folksy & Mommie Dearest sincere. The clown from It has more integrity and warmth. She'll be too old to run again in 27 years, so cross her off the list, especially as "Lickspittle" Lizzie is now charming the back room brokers with her "Don't believe anything I tell the rubes!" shtick.
"Blank Stare" Pete Buttigieg - His revealing moment came early on when he appeared constipated in response to Andy "UBI Candy" Yang's hilarious offer of cash for votes in the opening. Possessed of the fastest reptilian brain of the lot, Mayor Pete is a rising star in the Democrat Party as the best plutocrat Trojan Horse since Obama, but won't get to the White House this time around.
Cory "Clean, Articulate & Bright" Booker - Even Cory has a hard time taking himself seriously at this point. Once the brightest rising star in the Democrat Party, he's been eclipsed by "Blank Stare" Pete as a more ruthless aspirant to the puppet power of the bully pulpit.
Julián "Rico Suave" Castro - His memorable moment came when he allegedly picked on a poor confused old man who had wandered onstage & found himself at the center spot on the podium. Tied for creepiest remaining candidate with Harris.
Amy "Dry Drunk" Klobuchar - Her dad was an alcoholic, and dammit she KNOWS what pain feels like! Pain hurts, and when she's screaming at her staff, she thinks warmly of her dad, and how she's not a degenerate drunk (who ultimately found salvation!) like he was.
Beto "Oh Yes I WILL Take Your Gun!" O’Rourke - He puts the cringe in cringeworthy. Makes Sulu scream "Butch it up you little b*tch!!!" at the TV screen. If "Lickspittle" Lizzie is the class snitch, Beto is the class whipping boy. Completely clueless, and completely spineless.
Andy "UBI Candy" Yang - Oh dear heavens. Just too funny. The Democrat version of Trump, but nicer. Answers honestly and from the heart and hip. Way too sane and human to go much further.
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How do YOU rank the candidates from last night???