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Gluten Free Food Is Horrible

rhinefire

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Tried gluten free foods and all suck. Potato chips will give you live ending diarrhea. The bread is atrocious and too small for sandwiches. The pasta tastes like wax. The cereals taste like sawdust.
 
When I order food I always ask for extra gluten.
 
Tried gluten free foods and all suck. Potato chips will give you live ending diarrhea. The bread is atrocious and too small for sandwiches. The pasta tastes like wax. The cereals taste like sawdust.

Ugh...yes. With very few exceptions. My wife did a gluten free thing for a bit. Nearly ended in divorce. That said, corn pasta isn't bad - of all the pasta options, it was the best. Brown rice pasta still gives me dry heaves when I linger too long on the memory of the taste / texture combo.
 
Tried gluten free foods and all suck. Potato chips will give you live ending diarrhea. The bread is atrocious and too small for sandwiches. The pasta tastes like wax. The cereals taste like sawdust.

Unless you have celiac disease, there's no good reason to avoid gluten. Grains are some of the healthiest, most natural food sources around.

All the gluten-free stuff is kind of silly, if you ask me. Then again, I'm vegan and some think that's silly, too.
 
Tried gluten free foods and all suck. Potato chips will give you live ending diarrhea. The bread is atrocious and too small for sandwiches. The pasta tastes like wax. The cereals taste like sawdust.

I've avoided gluten for a few years now because it aggravates my arthritis, and I've learned to live with the choices. Yes, the bread is inferior but there are decent brands - I use Trader Joe's mostly. We had a trip in Washington state and found actually EXCELLENT gluten free bread out there - kind of a whole grain thing. Generally, though, the best I've found for bread is "Not bad," - nothing comes close to really good wheat bread, especially yeast bread, or biscuits. There are good cracker options, and I often use corn tortilla chips as a kind of cracker for cheese.

I've found the only good way to avoid or eliminate gluten is not to try to adapt a gluten diet to gluten free - i.e. regularly eat pasta, bread, crackers, but substitute gluten-free versions. I'm just not impressed. So my basic diet is kind of a whole food diet - fruit, meat, veggies, salad, a bit of rice, cheese, other dairy, eggs, lots of nuts of various sorts. My weakness is potato chips, Fritos, corn chips, etc.
 
Unless you have celiac disease, there's no good reason to avoid gluten. Grains are some of the healthiest, most natural food sources around.

All the gluten-free stuff is kind of silly, if you ask me. Then again, I'm vegan and some think that's silly, too.

That's not really true, at least for me. As I said above, I avoid it at home due to psoriatic arthritis, and since being off gluten I've more than doubled the length of time between shots I take to control it - from a 'prescribed' once-weekly to less than one shot a month. When I travel, we eat out a lot more than at home and so I have less control over diet. Many times I've ordered food that I thought would be 'safe' and been really sore the next day. Most recently it was meat tacos. Well, look at the basic 'seasoning' pack for taco meat and lots of it is full of gluten/flour as the thickener. I'm sure that was the cause. Other frequent causes are sauces, which also commonly use flour as thickener, soups, even salad dressing. It's too much trouble to worry about when traveling some times, so I just deal with the inflammation but the effect isn't in my head.

Anyway, I've tested it many times, and avoiding gluten works for me. Wish it didn't because I love bread, but if I eat like I did, I'm back to a shot about every 10 days instead of every 30-35 days. That's a big deal because the shots DELIBERATELY suppress my immune system, and make me more susceptible to disease, cancer, etc. So fewer shots the better.
 
What y'all need is some Putin gluten. It's marketed as Rooten Tooten Putin Gluten. That stuff'll put hair on the soles of your feet.
 
That's not really true, at least for me. As I said above, I avoid it at home due to psoriatic arthritis, and since being off gluten I've more than doubled the length of time between shots I take to control it - from a 'prescribed' once-weekly to less than one shot a month. When I travel, we eat out a lot more than at home and so I have less control over diet. Many times I've ordered food that I thought would be 'safe' and been really sore the next day. Most recently it was meat tacos. Well, look at the basic 'seasoning' pack for taco meat and lots of it is full of gluten/flour as the thickener. I'm sure that was the cause. Other frequent causes are sauces, which also commonly use flour as thickener, soups, even salad dressing. It's too much trouble to worry about when traveling some times, so I just deal with the inflammation but the effect isn't in my head.

Anyway, I've tested it many times, and avoiding gluten works for me. Wish it didn't because I love bread, but if I eat like I did, I'm back to a shot about every 10 days instead of every 30-35 days. That's a big deal because the shots DELIBERATELY suppress my immune system, and make me more susceptible to disease, cancer, etc. So fewer shots the better.

Greetings, JasperL. :2wave:

:agree: Cheerios advertises "Gluten Free" on every box, which is great, since it's my favorite cereal. I even snack on it dry while working at my computer.
 
What y'all need is some Putin gluten. It's marketed as Rooten Tooten Putin Gluten. That stuff'll put hair on the soles of your feet.

Saves spending on everyday shoes, too! What's not to like.... :mrgreen:
 
Tried gluten free foods and all suck. Potato chips will give you live ending diarrhea. The bread is atrocious and too small for sandwiches. The pasta tastes like wax. The cereals taste like sawdust.

The ability to digest and metabolize gluten was the result of a gene mutation.

Cornbread, apples, oranges and other fruit, meats, fish, legumes, deciduous vegetables, nuts, berries, dairy, chocolate pudding, custards, all have no gluten. They taste fine to me. Please pass a slice of the flourless chocolate cake. I like it with an iced coffee or a glass of tawny port.

Very few people suffer abdominal stress from potato chips. Perhaps you should discuss this matter with your doctor? I'm not saying I know, but I suspect that is indicative of a far different problem for you. Not that it is wise to eat junk food empty calories like potato chips.
 
The ability to digest and metabolize gluten was the result of a gene mutation.

Cornbread, apples, oranges and other fruit, meats, fish, legumes, deciduous vegetables, nuts, berries, dairy, chocolate pudding, custards, all have no gluten. They taste fine to me. Please pass a slice of the flourless chocolate cake. I like it with an iced coffee or a glass of tawny port.

Very few people suffer abdominal stress from potato chips. Perhaps you should discuss this matter with your doctor? I'm not saying I know, but I suspect that is indicative of a far different problem for you. Not that it is wise to eat junk food empty calories like potato chips.

I have to admit my cornbread recipe is pretty average. I use corn meal, and add in masa flour (1cup total for 8# lodge pan), and sometimes it's great, but I kind of eyeball it and it's pretty inconsistent, often too crumbly. My wife likes it with sugar so I add that (heresy growing up), an egg, and milk or buttermilk and oil for the cast iron pan.... If you've got a good recipe, I'd love to see it.
 
I have to admit my cornbread recipe is pretty average. I use corn meal, and add in masa flour (1cup total for 8# lodge pan), and sometimes it's great, but I kind of eyeball it and it's pretty inconsistent, often too crumbly. My wife likes it with sugar so I add that (heresy growing up), an egg, and milk or buttermilk and oil for the cast iron pan.... If you've got a good recipe, I'd love to see it.

Key #1 for both recipes I'm giving you, preheat the oven. #2 don't overcook, the result is crumbling. #3 every oven is different, use an oven thermometer to make sure the oven isn't too hot, or crumbling cornbread.

Classic cornbread requires a cast iron skillet.

2½ cups coarse-grind cornmeal
1¼ teaspoons baking soda
1¼ teaspoons kosher salt
1 large egg
1⅔ cups buttermilk
2 tablespoons bacon fat, lard, or unsalted butter

Preheat oven to 375°. Set dry skillet over low heat to heat while you make the batter. Whisk cornmeal, baking soda, and salt in a medium bowl. Make a well in the center and add egg and buttermilk, then whisk vigorously, starting in the center to incorporate egg and working your way out, until dry ingredients are incorporated and batter is smooth.

Increase heat to medium-high and add bacon fat to skillet. Swirl to coat bottom and sides of skillet. Whisk batter once more to reincorporate, then pour into skillet and smooth top (batter will sputter around edges).

Bake cornbread in oven until the edges are golden brown and the top is golden, cracked in places, and firm to the touch, 25–30 minutes. Let cool in the skillet at least 5 minutes before cutting into wedges. To please your wife's sweet tooth serve with honey butter.

The cornbread I make at home:

8 tbsp. (1 stick) unsalted butter, melted
1/2 c. honey give or take
2 eggs, room temperature
1 c. buttermilk, room temperature
1 c. coarse cornmeal
1 c. fine cornmeal
½ tsp. salt
½ tsp. baking soda

½ tbsp. unsalted butter, melted (for brushing)

Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Lightly butter an 8x8 inch glass or stainless steel baking pan, set aside.

In a large mixing bowl, combine the melted butter, sugar and honey. Whisk in the eggs one at a time, beating until the mixture is smooth. Add the buttermilk and mix to combine.

In a medium mixing bowl whisk together the flour, cornmeal, salt and baking soda. Gradually add the dry ingredients to the wet ingredients, stirring with a spatula or wood spoon until only a few lumps remain. Pour the batter into the prepared pan, smoothing the top with the spatula to create an even layer. Allow the batter to sit for 3 or 4 minutes before placing in the oven to bake.

Bake for 25-35 minutes or until the top is golden brown and a cake tester inserted into the center comes out clean. You may need to place a piece of foil over the top at the 20 minute mark to prevent over-browning. Remove from the oven, brush the top with butter and allow to cool for 5-10 minutes before slicing and serving.

No substitutes for the butter milk. Use whole milk when making muffins.

I've made the first recipe over the banked hot ashes of an open fire, covered the skillet, turned it every eight minutes or so for even cooking, and it takes a bit longer, requires more eyeballing. Carrying a cast iron skillet while camping can be a pain to carry, but it's great for cooking on a fire, and doubles as a defensive weapon. You can always smack a bear on the nose with it. Never done so, but it can be. My wife tried to hit me with one once, but I took General Sun Tzu's advice, "Run like the hellhounds are on your tail."
 
Tried gluten free foods and all suck. Potato chips will give you live ending diarrhea. The bread is atrocious and too small for sandwiches. The pasta tastes like wax. The cereals taste like sawdust.

Wine is gluten free
 
my wife and i like these :

gf-hmo_702cae0fe5d4daeceb677e9c818efffa.jpg

we don't have any gluten issues; we just dig these pretzels.
 
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