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Chivalry

Josie

Josie

*probably reading smut*
Supporting Member
DP Veteran
Joined
Mar 25, 2010
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Gender
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Political Leaning
Libertarian - Right
Ladies -- what do you expect from a man in terms of chivalry? I know, I know -- you expect that all people would be courteous - me too. But I'm speaking specifically about going on a date or being in a relationship with someone (married or not). Which of these things do you expect a man to do? Add to the list if you want. :)

1. Holding the door open for you.
2. Opening the car door for you (getting out and getting in).
3. Sharing his umbrella even if he gets a little wet.
4. Offering you his coat when you're cold.
5. Walking on the street-side of the sidewalk.
6. Pulling out your chair for you to sit down.
7. Helping you with your coat.
8. Keeping your private lives to himself -- no giving all the details to friends.
9. Giving flowers or something else meaningful to you for no special reason - just because.
10. Calling just to say "good morning" or "good night".

Men -- which of those things do you do or would be willing to do?
 
Josie said:
Ladies -- what do you expect from a man in terms of chivalry? I know, I know -- you expect that all people would be courteous - me too. But I'm speaking specifically about going on a date or being in a relationship with someone (married or not). Which of these things do you expect a man to do? Add to the list if you want. :)

1. Holding the door open for you.
2. Opening the car door for you (getting out and getting in).
3. Sharing his umbrella even if he gets a little wet.
4. Offering you his coat when you're cold.
5. Walking on the street-side of the sidewalk.
6. Pulling out your chair for you to sit down.
7. Helping you with your coat.
8. Keeping your private lives to himself -- no giving all the details to friends.
9. Giving flowers or something else meaningful to you for no special reason - just because.
10. Calling just to say "good morning" or "good night".

Men -- which of those things do you do or would be willing to do?
Click to expand...

7-8-9-10
 
Josie said:
Ladies -- what do you expect from a man in terms of chivalry? I know, I know -- you expect that all people would be courteous - me too. But I'm speaking specifically about going on a date or being in a relationship with someone (married or not). Which of these things do you expect a man to do? Add to the list if you want. :)

1. Holding the door open for you.
2. Opening the car door for you (getting out and getting in).
3. Sharing his umbrella even if he gets a little wet.
4. Offering you his coat when you're cold.
5. Walking on the street-side of the sidewalk.
6. Pulling out your chair for you to sit down.
7. Helping you with your coat.
8. Keeping your private lives to himself -- no giving all the details to friends.
9. Giving flowers or something else meaningful to you for no special reason - just because.
10. Calling just to say "good morning" or "good night".

Men -- which of those things do you do or would be willing to do?
Click to expand...

I've pretty much lived my whole life doing 1-8. Flowers, on special occasions, none of this just because. Perhaps when I was 50 or more years younger just because might have happened. Calling up to wish good morning or good night. I've done that on a few occasions, the good night portion. But that was when I was TDY away from home. Now once Ft. McPherson closed and FORSCOM moved to Ft. Bragg, the wife stayed in Georgia with the house and the dogs. I went to Ft. Bragg myself being only a year and a bit away from retiring. I always called her up at night. Just to make sure.
 
Josie said:
Ladies -- what do you expect from a man in terms of chivalry? I know, I know -- you expect that all people would be courteous - me too. But I'm speaking specifically about going on a date or being in a relationship with someone (married or not). Which of these things do you expect a man to do? Add to the list if you want. :)

1. Holding the door open for you.
2. Opening the car door for you (getting out and getting in).
3. Sharing his umbrella even if he gets a little wet.
4. Offering you his coat when you're cold.
5. Walking on the street-side of the sidewalk.
6. Pulling out your chair for you to sit down.
7. Helping you with your coat.
8. Keeping your private lives to himself -- no giving all the details to friends.
9. Giving flowers or something else meaningful to you for no special reason - just because.
10. Calling just to say "good morning" or "good night".

Men -- which of those things do you do or would be willing to do?
Click to expand...

1,3,4,5,6,7, and 8.

2. She can open her own car door that's a bit ridiculous.
9. Flower and cards are dumb, I don't do them period.
10. I hate this constant contact people need these days. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
 
1-9. I will forget to do ten anyway, so yeah.
 
Crovax said:
1,3,4,5,6,7, and 8.

2. She can open her own car door that's a bit ridiculous.
9. Flower and cards are dumb, I don't do them period.
10. I hate this constant contact people need these days. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
Click to expand...

What if you knew that sending her flowers or just ONE flower would make her day?
 
Josie said:
What if you knew that sending her flowers or just ONE flower would make her day?
Click to expand...

Flowers is such a generic gift though. Wouldn't you like something that took a bit of thought instead?
 
Henrin said:
Flowers is such a generic gift though. Wouldn't you like something that took a bit of thought instead?
Click to expand...

I really love flowers. Other women might like something different.

Crovax said:
I would find a much better small gift for her.
Click to expand...

Why? If you KNOW she loves flowers - why not get her flowers?
 
Josie said:
Ladies -- what do you expect from a man in terms of chivalry? I know, I know -- you expect that all people would be courteous - me too. But I'm speaking specifically about going on a date or being in a relationship with someone (married or not). Which of these things do you expect a man to do? Add to the list if you want. :)

1. Holding the door open for you.
2. Opening the car door for you (getting out and getting in).
3. Sharing his umbrella even if he gets a little wet.
4. Offering you his coat when you're cold.
5. Walking on the street-side of the sidewalk.
6. Pulling out your chair for you to sit down.
7. Helping you with your coat.
8. Keeping your private lives to himself -- no giving all the details to friends.
9. Giving flowers or something else meaningful to you for no special reason - just because.
10. Calling just to say "good morning" or "good night".

Men -- which of those things do you do or would be willing to do?
Click to expand...

1 - I don't know about chivalry but I do that for pretty much everyone
2 - I used to do that both in and out but now it depends on the situation. I usually do open the door for her to get in but not always to get out unless it's a more formal function we're attending.
3 - I live in Arizona and don't own an umbrella
4 - Again, this is an Arizona thing and coats aren't part of my daily apparel but if it might be chilly where we're going and I did bring a coat I'd certainly let her use it
5 - This is one I often do. You never know when you'll have to grab a runaway horse.
6 - This is kind of ingrained behavior
7 - Back to the Arizona thing but if you've got a coat I'll help with it
8 - Keeping things private? Yeah...unless she does something really funny or weird.
9 - I will give the occasional gift but it will be occasional and we will actually be in a relationship. I also do this for friends so it doesn't need to be romantic.
10 - I'm not a caller and when I do call I pretty much have to have a purpose. I had a buddy some years ago that would call his wife and they'd just sit there listening to each other breathe. It made me nauseous. If I call out of the blue it's going to be along the lines of "Hey, I'm on my way from Geno's. You want me to pick up some meatballs?"
 
Josie said:
I really love flowers. Other women might like something different.



Why? If you KNOW she loves flowers - why not get her flowers?
Click to expand...

Well I suppose if we had some flowers at the store that were going to be tossed anyways I might bring them to her
 
Crovax said:
Well I suppose if we had some flowers at the store that were going to be tossed anyways I might bring them to her
Click to expand...

The other great place is behind funeral homes. If you pick through that stuff you can really put something together that's nowhere near as gloomy.
 
Lutherf said:
The other great place is behind funeral homes. If you pick through that stuff you can really put something together that's nowhere near as gloomy.
Click to expand...

That sounds like a lot of effort
 
Crovax said:
Well I suppose if we had some flowers at the store that were going to be tossed anyways I might bring them to her
Click to expand...

Lutherf said:
The other great place is behind funeral homes. If you pick through that stuff you can really put something together that's nowhere near as gloomy.
Click to expand...

article-2340989-1A4D5DFB000005DC-153_634x425.jpg
 
Crovax said:
Well I suppose if we had some flowers at the store that were going to be tossed anyways I might bring them to her
Click to expand...

Lutherf said:
The other great place is behind funeral homes. If you pick through that stuff you can really put something together that's nowhere near as gloomy.
Click to expand...

Are you boys single, or do you just want to be?
 
I do 1,3, 4, 5, 8, 9, 10. I love affection and really have to try not to overdo it.
 
Josie said:
Ladies -- what do you expect from a man in terms of chivalry? I know, I know -- you expect that all people would be courteous - me too. But I'm speaking specifically about going on a date or being in a relationship with someone (married or not). Which of these things do you expect a man to do? Add to the list if you want. :)

1. Holding the door open for you.
2. Opening the car door for you (getting out and getting in).
3. Sharing his umbrella even if he gets a little wet.
4. Offering you his coat when you're cold.
5. Walking on the street-side of the sidewalk.
6. Pulling out your chair for you to sit down.
7. Helping you with your coat.
8. Keeping your private lives to himself -- no giving all the details to friends.
9. Giving flowers or something else meaningful to you for no special reason - just because.
10. Calling just to say "good morning" or "good night".

Men -- which of those things do you do or would be willing to do?
Click to expand...

Pulling out my chair is a little weird for me, but I like the other ones. I could do without him opening the car door for me to get out.
 
Josie said:
Ladies -- what do you expect from a man in terms of chivalry? I know, I know -- you expect that all people would be courteous - me too. But I'm speaking specifically about going on a date or being in a relationship with someone (married or not). Which of these things do you expect a man to do? Add to the list if you want. :)

1. Holding the door open for you.
2. Opening the car door for you (getting out and getting in).
3. Sharing his umbrella even if he gets a little wet.
4. Offering you his coat when you're cold.
5. Walking on the street-side of the sidewalk.
6. Pulling out your chair for you to sit down.
7. Helping you with your coat.
8. Keeping your private lives to himself -- no giving all the details to friends.
9. Giving flowers or something else meaningful to you for no special reason - just because.
10. Calling just to say "good morning" or "good night".

Men -- which of those things do you do or would be willing to do?
Click to expand...
Depends on if I want to get me a little something or not that day. :)
 
calamity said:
Depends on if I want to get me a little something or not that day. :)
Click to expand...

Argh. That's a great way to miss the point of the entire thing.
 
Thoughtful and well mannered men are difficult to find. I got one at home and appreciate him every day.


1. Holding the door open for you.
when possible, but I don't mind if he holds the door for someone else either. It means he cares

2. Opening the car door for you (getting out and getting in).
I am too fast

3. Sharing his umbrella even if he gets a little wet.
I am the one holding the umbrella, he gets wet and likes it it. We also jump into puddles just because

4. Offering you his coat when you're cold.
He is the one who is cold. I am the one being visited by the occasional age related power surges.

5. Walking on the street-side of the sidewalk.
Appreciated, but forgiven since often not possible. Too many rude people around.

6. Pulling out your chair for you to sit down.
Absolutely, and a gentle lingering of hand on arm.

7. Helping you with your coat.
Nice gesture, but not a must

8. Keeping your private lives to himself -- no giving all the details to friends.
I can't think of much that others couldn't know. They know I snore. What else is there?

9. Giving flowers or something else meaningful to you for no special reason - just because.
We do that often, just because.

10. Calling just to say "good morning" or "good night".
Absolutely.
 
Crovax said:
Well I suppose if we had some flowers at the store that were going to be tossed anyways I might bring them to her
Click to expand...

Gee, thanks. Great example of "It's the thought that counts." :roll:
 
Lutherf said:
The other great place is behind funeral homes. If you pick through that stuff you can really put something together that's nowhere near as gloomy.
Click to expand...

Oh, why stop there?

You'd be surprised by how many people steal fresh flowers from graves for their dinner party table arrangements. BTW, I am NOT making this up.
 
Henrin said:
Flowers is such a generic gift though. Wouldn't you like something that took a bit of thought instead?
Click to expand...

I remember a discussion a few years ago during which a DP member named Summerwind posted that she crossed men who brought her flowers off her list. She hated that, and their bringing flowers proved that they didn't respect her enough pay attention to her likes/dislikes.

Takes all kind. I love flowers so much that I buy them for myself, particularly alstromeria, from time to time, and I grow them too.
 
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