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Your Dating "Preferences" Are Bigoted

Absentglare said:
The only way to influence social norms is with individual thought.

And it's not about forcing anyone to like anything. It's more like thinking for yourself, rather than defaulting to society's criteria.
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Like any totalitarian minded group, they don't care of you like it, they just want to force you to do it.
 
SDET said:
That would go against their "heads I win; tails you lose" approach or whatever it is they do with their heads and tails.
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I suppose that is one way to look at it.
 
TheGoverness said:


So this video here is pushing the idea that having certain preferences for the people that you date is 'bigoted' (Ex: someone doesn't want to date a trans person because they don't find trans people attractive).

I find this logic to be extremely flawed. First of all, people just can't help what you are attracted to. There's no way you can change that. People can't just go and suddenly change their sexual orientation(which is funny, because the reasoning behind this video is actually quite similar to the logic behind "Gay Conversion Therapy").

Going by her own standard, I would be bigoted because I'm not attracted to guys.

But what are your thoughts on the matter? Do you consider dating preferences to be bigoted or nah?
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I will only date someone who is Jewish and I've been questioned on that before.
 
TheGoverness said:


So this video here is pushing the idea that having certain preferences for the people that you date is 'bigoted' (Ex: someone doesn't want to date a trans person because they don't find trans people attractive).

I find this logic to be extremely flawed. First of all, people just can't help what you are attracted to. There's no way you can change that. People can't just go and suddenly change their sexual orientation(which is funny, because the reasoning behind this video is actually quite similar to the logic behind "Gay Conversion Therapy").

Going by her own standard, I would be bigoted because I'm not attracted to guys.

But what are your thoughts on the matter? Do you consider dating preferences to be bigoted or nah?
Click to expand...


Can't help what makes you horny. You can help whether you dislike someone for being themselves.

Personally, I think sexuality is a scale, no one is totally straight or totally gay. No matter what they've convinced themselves. I myself am attracted to men, women, trans of just about every ethnicity. I like to think I am an equal opportunity lover, but really I'm just horney and don't care where it comes from.

Makes the weekends fun, for me and the wife!:mrgreen:
 
Slyfox696 said:
I only watched a minute or so before I got annoyed enough to stop. The entire premise of the video is stupid. If I don't find someone to be attractive, then I don't find them to be attractive. It says nothing else about me. If I don't think a black woman is attractive (and there have been very few who I've found attractive), then it doesn't make me bigoted. That's stupid. The argument of "you can control who you are attracted to" is absurd, especially coming from a member of a demographic which has long claimed their sexuality is not a choice.

I don't find men attractive. It doesn't make me a bigot, it just means it doesn't do it for me. The same goes for most black women and most Asian women. Just don't do it for me. The idea of having a preference for a dating partner makes me bigoted is absurd.
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"Bigot" is one of the most over-used word in today's lexicon. Along with discrimination.

Apparently we're all bigots because we all discriminate.
 
Sherman123 said:
I will only date someone who is Jewish and I've been questioned on that before.
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I have been blessed to have known the pleasures of a few young Jewish women in my time. (Back in the day, of course. ;)) God bless them all.

I can't see myself marrying one though. I'm cool with just boinking them though. :lamo
 
Captain America said:
I have been blessed to have known the pleasures of a few young Jewish women in my time. (Back in the day, of course. ;)) God bless them all.

I can't see myself marrying one though. I'm cool with just boinking them though. :lamo
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Hahaha, well we have a saying in the community 'Shiksas Are for Practice'.
 
TheGoverness said:
But what are your thoughts on the matter? Do you consider dating preferences to be bigoted or nah?
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There ought to be a show entitled, "Youtubers Say the Darndest Things."

Look, there can be biases that are simply bigoted, but you can't force someone to become attracted to something they aren't attracted to.
 
Fiddytree said:
There ought to be a show entitled, "Youtubers Say the Darndest Things."

Look, there can be biases that are simply bigoted, but you can't force someone to become attracted to something they aren't attracted to.
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There's a Jimmy Kimmel skit where celebrities recite mean tweets said about them. Pretty close.
 
TheGoverness said:


So this video here is pushing the idea that having certain preferences for the people that you date is 'bigoted' (Ex: someone doesn't want to date a trans person because they don't find trans people attractive).

I find this logic to be extremely flawed. First of all, people just can't help what you are attracted to. There's no way you can change that. People can't just go and suddenly change their sexual orientation(which is funny, because the reasoning behind this video is actually quite similar to the logic behind "Gay Conversion Therapy").

Going by her own standard, I would be bigoted because I'm not attracted to guys.

But what are your thoughts on the matter? Do you consider dating preferences to be bigoted or nah?
Click to expand...


I haven't dated in a very long time as I have been happily married for a very long time, but hell yes. If I was single and ready to re-enter the dating world I would have some very strong biases. I suppose some could call those bigoted though I don't see it that way.

1. He would need to be good company reasonably attractive to me, and he would have to be a guy because that's the way I'm made.
2. He would have to have reasonable social skills--have reasonably good manners, fashion sense for the occasion, matched socks, etc.
3. He would have to have a job or otherwise be financially self sufficient; i.e. not looking for a sugar mama or meal ticket.
4. He would need to be a good conversationalist, be sufficiently educated to be aware and up on things, and have a proper sense of humor.
5. He would need to be a spiritual person, preferably Christian.
6. He would need to be a good enough driver that I wouldn't need to white knuckle it everywhere we went.
7. He would need to enjoy playing cards or games or whatever with other people.
8. He would need to be kind, thoughtful, and love animals.
9. He would need to be tidy enough that he wouldn't need a lot of picking up after.
10. He would need to enjoy doing chores together with me.
11. He would need to be in reasonably good health.

That's a lot isn't it? But I found all that most of the time in the guy I have, so I know they're out there.
 
Slyfox696 said:
I only watched a minute or so before I got annoyed enough to stop. The entire premise of the video is stupid. If I don't find someone to be attractive, then I don't find them to be attractive. It says nothing else about me. If I don't think a black woman is attractive (and there have been very few who I've found attractive), then it doesn't make me bigoted. That's stupid. The argument of "you can control who you are attracted to" is absurd, especially coming from a member of a demographic which has long claimed their sexuality is not a choice.

I don't find men attractive. It doesn't make me a bigot, it just means it doesn't do it for me. The same goes for most black women and most Asian women. Just don't do it for me. The idea of having a preference for a dating partner makes me bigoted is absurd.
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The same with me.

I can only handle so much ignorance.

Why do people date? Is it for fun, or to find a life partner?

Why would a man date a trans if there is no future for a family there?

Most people date within their race because they want their kids to look like them.

There is nothing bigoted about who we are attracted to or why.

If there is, so what?
 
Mason66 said:
The same with me.

I can only handle so much ignorance.

Why do people date? Is it for fun, or to find a life partner?

Why would a man date a trans if there is no future for a family there?

Most people date within their race because they want their kids to look like them.

There is nothing bigoted about who we are attracted to or why.

If there is, so what?
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I feel like you guys are really stuck on the word "bigot".

The video isn't trying to say there's anything wrong with what your goals are, but that it's worth trying to understand what you really want. If your goal is to have kids of the same race, then that's going to influence how you choose a mate. You're going to want someone who is fertile, has the opposite set of genitals, is the same race, and has similar goals.

There's no hatred involved there.
 
Absentglare said:
I feel like you guys are really stuck on the word "bigot".

The video isn't trying to say there's anything wrong with what your goals are, but that it's worth trying to understand what you really want. If your goal is to have kids of the same race, then that's going to influence how you choose a mate. You're going to want someone who is fertile, has the opposite set of genitals, is the same race, and has similar goals.

There's no hatred involved there.
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The word bigot is used in a hateful way.

What do you think the purpose of the video really is?
 
Mason66 said:
The word bigot is used in a hateful way.

What do you think the purpose of the video really is?
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The overall purpose of the video is to challenge broad, category-based attraction qualifications. These categories (like claiming to not be attracted to trans, black, fat, or disabled people) are more culturally learned rather than simply individual preferences. It's better to judge whether an individual is attractive by their individual merits, rather than based on what categories they are associated with.

I think the exception for that is when the category is meaningful to you. For example, if you want to be a biological parent, that places very specific categorical requirements on a potential mate.
 
TheGoverness said:
[video=youtube;2X-PgHSZh6U]

So this video here is pushing the idea that having certain preferences for the people that you date is 'bigoted' (Ex: someone doesn't want to date a trans person because they don't find trans people attractive).

I find this logic to be extremely flawed. First of all, people just can't help what you are attracted to. There's no way you can change that. People can't just go and suddenly change their sexual orientation(which is funny, because the reasoning behind this video is actually quite similar to the logic behind "Gay Conversion Therapy").

Going by her own standard, I would be bigoted because I'm not attracted to guys.

But what are your thoughts on the matter? Do you consider dating preferences to be bigoted or nah?
Click to expand...

I suppose "extremely flawed" is what I'd go with as well, simply because this isn't the basement....


I'm not going to watch the video, but based on your description, I suspect the person who speaks in it is equally flawed. There's an old saying - "the heart knows what it desires". So too do the Naughty Bits. Despite the other saying, that it's what's inside that counts, physical attraction plays a role. That role is often biggest at the beginning of any relationship, typically. If one simply isn't attracted to certain people as a general matter and it isn't because one thinks people of certain classes are inferior, etc., then it can't be bigotry. Most broadly, bigotry is categorical intolerance of/negative views towards certain classes of person.

The still in the OP looks like a fairly blatant trans person. It strikes me as incredibly bizarre that they would overlook one of the things I'd expect them to be particularly sensitive towards: sexual orientation. If a man is heterosexual, then he is simply not going to be capable of sexual attraction towards another male. If he's initially interested because the other male put on a convincing appearance of femaleness, then things will change the moment he finds out they have the same equipment. That's not bigotry. That's sexual orientation.




Everyone has preferences. To pretend otherwise is absurd. For example, I simply do not find myself sexually attracted to obese persons. It's simply the way it is. I don't have anything personally against them. But, my naughty bits just don't seem to approve. What can I say?
 
Mr Person said:
I suppose "extremely flawed" is what I'd go with as well, simply because this isn't the basement....


I'm not going to watch the video, but based on your description, I suspect the person who speaks in it is equally flawed. There's an old saying - "the heart knows what it desires". So too do the Naughty Bits. Despite the other saying, that it's what's inside that counts, physical attraction plays a role. That role is often biggest at the beginning of any relationship, typically. If one simply isn't attracted to certain people as a general matter and it isn't because one thinks people of certain classes are inferior, etc., then it can't be bigotry. Most broadly, bigotry is categorical intolerance of/negative views towards certain classes of person.

The still in the OP looks like a fairly blatant trans person. It strikes me as incredibly bizarre that they would overlook one of the things I'd expect them to be particularly sensitive towards: sexual orientation. If a man is heterosexual, then he is simply not going to be capable of sexual attraction towards another male. If he's initially interested because the other male put on a convincing appearance of femaleness, then things will change the moment he finds out they have the same equipment. That's not bigotry. That's sexual orientation.




Everyone has preferences. To pretend otherwise is absurd. For example, I simply do not find myself sexually attracted to obese persons. It's simply the way it is. I don't have anything personally against them. But, my naughty bits just don't seem to approve. What can I say?
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Actually he is right in his perspective, the whole thrust of the argument transgender people make is that they are really the gender they claim to be and not what their biology is and to not accept them as a member of their purported gender is bigotry.

So it is a perfectly logical extension to state that if you accept trans people really are women if they were born men, you are being bigoted against them by not considering them to be women if you are a Herero sexual man
 
TheGoverness said:


So this video here is pushing the idea that having certain preferences for the people that you date is 'bigoted' (Ex: someone doesn't want to date a trans person because they don't find trans people attractive).

I find this logic to be extremely flawed. First of all, people just can't help what you are attracted to. There's no way you can change that. People can't just go and suddenly change their sexual orientation(which is funny, because the reasoning behind this video is actually quite similar to the logic behind "Gay Conversion Therapy").

Going by her own standard, I would be bigoted because I'm not attracted to guys.

But what are your thoughts on the matter? Do you consider dating preferences to be bigoted or nah?
Click to expand...


I have read crapola like this before.

A person's sexual preferences are their own and NOT subject to civil rights laws.
Who we screw is who we enjoy screwing. Some people cannot deal with this reality.
A shapely biological redheaded female wearing fishnet hose and a pencil skirt will make my hormones go wild.
A biological MAN in a red wig, dressed the same way will make me puke.

It is amazing the lengths some will go to with their PC culture.

Sexual attraction is an extremely personal thing, and the Social Justice Warriors need to move along and find some other dragon to slay.

No one reading this needs to justify their attraction to anyone. it just is.
 
Sherman123 said:
I will only date someone who is Jewish and I've been questioned on that before.
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A good choice.
I have dated several Jewish women, and they were fantastic lovers.
One took me to Disney World for my birthday, her treat.
An excellent choice indeed.
 
TheGoverness said:


So this video here is pushing the idea that having certain preferences for the people that you date is 'bigoted' (Ex: someone doesn't want to date a trans person because they don't find trans people attractive).

I find this logic to be extremely flawed. First of all, people just can't help what you are attracted to. There's no way you can change that. People can't just go and suddenly change their sexual orientation(which is funny, because the reasoning behind this video is actually quite similar to the logic behind "Gay Conversion Therapy").

Going by her own standard, I would be bigoted because I'm not attracted to guys.

But what are your thoughts on the matter? Do you consider dating preferences to be bigoted or nah?
Click to expand...


Not at all. One of the reasons people date is to find a mate. Sure, some do it just for the sex, but I think finding someone special for oneself is what is desired by most. What or whom a person is attracted to is within the makeup of that person. Not bigoted. Perhaps bias is a better word, we all have them. Bias is nothing more than likes or dislikes.

I think someone would be an idiot to date or try to form a relationship with someone who they are not attracted to. You date because you have a good time with the person your dating, one shouldn't have to worry about whether someone somewhere thinks you bigoted for whom you decide you like and want to see more of.
 
ThoughtEx. said:
Can't help what makes you horny. You can help whether you dislike someone for being themselves.

Personally, I think sexuality is a scale, no one is totally straight or totally gay. No matter what they've convinced themselves. I myself am attracted to men, women, trans of just about every ethnicity. I like to think I am an equal opportunity lover, but really I'm just horney and don't care where it comes from.

Makes the weekends fun, for me and the wife!:mrgreen:
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I think this would make you a Pan-sexual, as I understand it.
Freddy of QUEEN was said to be one.
A lady in Florida explained it much simpler to me.
She said a Pan-sexual is into....guys, girls, & goats.
Wherever it fits.

However, I would like to be the first man you have ever met, then, who is 100% HETERO-sexual.

WOMEN ONLY...always has, always will be. No exceptions.
Not only that, I also prefer my own age group now that I am older.
When on-line dating I set the minimum age at 45, or around there.
Much less games, much more practical, and infinitely better lovers.

The younger women's profiles seemed to say you had to "qualify" to date them, as if it was lined with gold or something.

Another strange and odd fact I learned while on-line dating.
It was much, much easier for me to date women when I was in my late 40's and beyond than it ever was when I was in my 20's, fit, had all my hair, and a washboard stomach.
Life is strange sometimes.
 
RetiredNSmilin said:
I think this would make you a Pan-sexual, as I understand it.
Freddy of QUEEN was said to be one.
A lady in Florida explained it much simpler to me.
She said a Pan-sexual is into....guys, girls, & goats.
Wherever it fits.

However, I would like to be the first man you have ever met, then, who is 100% HETERO-sexual.

WOMEN ONLY...always has, always will be. No exceptions.
Not only that, I also prefer my own age group now that I am older.
When on-line dating I set the minimum age at 45, or around there.
Much less games, much more practical, and infinitely better lovers.

The younger women's profiles seemed to say you had to "qualify" to date them, as if it was lined with gold or something.

Another strange and odd fact I learned while on-line dating.
It was much, much easier for me to date women when I was in my late 40's and beyond than it ever was when I was in my 20's, fit, had all my hair, and a washboard stomach.
Life is strange sometimes.
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Query, do only girl on girl scenes turn you on? Or are you fine with the normal man-woman scenes?

If you answer only girl-girl rocks my socks, then fine. But if you can get down to a normal scene, then your on a scale. Admittedly very much to one side. But as Ron White likes to say, "We're all a little gay..."

And it's easier for men to date later in life, because for some reason women's first husbands tend to die off. If you can get past a certain age, you'll be swimming in it. It's like 10 women to 1 guy after 60. It's not dying before you hit the promised land that is the hard part.
 
TheGoverness said:


So this video here is pushing the idea that having certain preferences for the people that you date is 'bigoted' (Ex: someone doesn't want to date a trans person because they don't find trans people attractive).

I find this logic to be extremely flawed. First of all, people just can't help what you are attracted to. There's no way you can change that. People can't just go and suddenly change their sexual orientation(which is funny, because the reasoning behind this video is actually quite similar to the logic behind "Gay Conversion Therapy").

Going by her own standard, I would be bigoted because I'm not attracted to guys.

But what are your thoughts on the matter? Do you consider dating preferences to be bigoted or nah?
Click to expand...

I don't date. My wife would not approve.

But, if I was single, I'd selectively look for a few things and not look at all at anyone not fitting that bill.

1. Female, biological female only
2. Attraction, mutual physical attraction
3. Personality: can I stand you; can you stand me?
4. Food: do you eat what I eat; do you like to cook?
5. Sex: do you like sex?
6. Money: are you good with it or does it burn a hole in your pocket?
7. Kids: are they adult; are they self-sufficient; are they in jail?
8. House: rent or own? Condo is fine.
9. Pets: I hope you like them, dogs more than cats preferably
10. Health: STD free, I hope.

What doesnt matter at this stage in my life
1. Age: if you are within 5 years of my age, I'm good.
2. Race: Black, White, Asian, Latino...who cares?
3. Religion: go to church all day, if you want, just don't try converting me
4. Wealth: don't need a rich bitch, just someone who doesn't piss away money
5. Health: at our age, I'd expect some sort of medical condition
 
ThoughtEx. said:
Query, do only girl on girl scenes turn you on? Or are you fine with the normal man-woman scenes?

If you answer only girl-girl rocks my socks, then fine. But if you can get down to a normal scene, then your on a scale. Admittedly very much to one side. But as Ron White likes to say, "We're all a little gay..."

And it's easier for men to date later in life, because for some reason women's first husbands tend to die off. If you can get past a certain age, you'll be swimming in it. It's like 10 women to 1 guy after 60. It's not dying before you hit the promised land that is the hard part.
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That is as logical explanation as any i have heard as to why past 40 there are so many nice women out there in the dating world.
I am glad I enjoyed it, and even more glad i met a really good woman that I married.

As far as all of us being ..."a little gay". That was a comedy routine Ron did that was funny, but it has ZERO truth to it.
We I see porn, I always laugh at how them men are 100% free of any hair. It is completely silly. NO ONE looks like that except in a porn movie....and I NEVER look at their junk.
and if the wo....what do I mean "if"...WHEN... the woman gets plowed, I only look at her body and also laugh at all the silly sounds they make while getting plowed.
Porn is comic relief to someone with a regular sex life.

Once while i was staying in a motel for 6 weeks while buying my house here, they had porn on channel 60.
If a show got boring, I would switch to 60 and lot even look at the screen sometimes, and just listen to the cheesy music and the OHH, AHHH, OH Baby, Oh Baby, the woman kept saying over and over again.

Once you have enjoyed REAL SEX, with a REAL WOMAN, all that porn is completely silly, and has no bearing on reality.
Like i said, it is comic relief.

AS AN ASIDE: In the Navy, if you dared someone to do something, you would say, " There ain't a hair on your ass"! meaning real men have hairy asses. I sent a buddy of mine a dare who happened to be at sea on a yacht, and in the email of the dare, I included a pic of my own hairy ass to him. with the caption, Mine is, but their ain't a hair on your ass if you do not do this!

He did it, then came back and raised hell with me after they put in. Gotta have a sense of humor if you are gonna hang with "the kid".

I still have the pic if anyone wants it.
 
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