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'Gay' columnist blasts same-sex marriage

That's the sort of thinking that makes juvenile detention a growth industry.

One of the unpleasant little truths that Moderns have so much trouble with is that their beautiful little baby is a natural savage, and that in less than 4 years the rudimentary concepts of civilization, morality and the much devalued virtue obedience must be rigorously, and often painfully imprinted upon it.

The older I get, the more that I think that constant expressions of affection rather than stern expectation damage the adults that children become, and by extension society.

I have come to believe that the relatively young idea that childhood should be happy, is a culturally decadent and suicidal one. (Look up the norms for child rearing in Colonial America if you believe me not, an consider that adults that resulted then, as opposed to the lifelong adolescents that we produce now.)

Since when does 'loving and supportive' and paying attention (givng a crap) to a kid equal no discipline? My parents were incredibly loving and supportive and we had lots of rules, punishment, structure, spankings when young, grounding when older (consequences), had to do chores, were taught to be respectful and polite, to do for others, etc etc etc. They were and are very affectionate as well.
 
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Again, then who handles power of attorney, inheritance rights, etc.?

Who handles it when a couple isnt married now? People can go and have all those things done on their own with attorneys...and do. Or dont but it still gets handled.
 
OMG THE CHILLUN!!! This is the same bull**** argument thrown out against interracial marriage back in the day. There is no actual evidence to back up the claim. I think a child has the right to two gay parents who are loving and supportive as opposed to two straight ones who can't get their **** together.

Gotta love it when morons describe equality as a "power grab."

There is evidence, but it's not kosher to talk about it.

Another downside for children of same-sex couples | The Barbershop: Dennis Byrne, Proprietor
 
I'm sorry but your beliefs are totally ignorant and based on your feelings and biases and not what the best studies have actually shown.

Isn't it funny that you try to say that yet I'm the only one who ever posts studies?
 
With 2 different contracts and 2 different designations, how would there be less?

Probably because a lot of people wouldn't bother to care enough to do it.
 
Isn't it funny that you try to say that yet I'm the only one who ever posts studies?

I think it's funny that you THINK you're the only one who posts studies. I have posted plenty of studies during my time at DP on this issue.
 
Major methodological flaws in this study. The sample size is somewhat problematic, though that is fairly minor. The major problem is his "child" identification process. Also, the rearing timeframe is not considered. Nothing really of interest because of these problems.

Care to elaborate?
 
I think it's funny that you THINK you're the only one who posts studies. I have posted plenty of studies during my time at DP on this issue.

Yet you've never presented one with me.
 
Just because he's gay this somehow gives this tired old argument credence?

The argument is bull****.

I became a father a week and a half ago when my beautiful wife gave birth to a baby boy.

We're trying our best, but we're by no means perfect parents and from what I've experienced so far, all a child really needs is loving, supporting parents who give a crap about it...

This world is far from perfect, there's ALOT of bad parents out there and again, good parents are good parents, they'll never be perfect but if those good parents happen to be both of the same sex... so be it.

Congratulations, Jet! Stand by for the ride of your life!
 
Fair enough. Gay people raise children. Why should those children not enjoy having married parents? And why does out society allow heterosexual people who cannot have children or who choose not to have children to get married and to remain married? Why don't we mandate marriage for parents who have children out of wedlock?

If it doesn't matter that they are not traditional parents (opposite gender), why would it matter if they are traditionally married (as opposed to common law, domestic partners, etc)?

The problem I have with this "marriage is about children" standard is it only seems to apply to same sex couples and it completely ignores the millions of children in this country who are raised by same sex couples. It also ignores the reality of how marriage is actually practiced by the heterosexual population.

or the horrors imposed on many children by opposite sex parents. While I agree that there is a traditional model of a family that can be superior to any other modern interpretation of marriage and family...it's certainly been far more abused and battered by heterosexuals than it has been by homosexuals.
 
Yet you've never presented one with me.

I had to dig a bit to find this. It's 3 years old:

http://www.debatepolitics.com/break...ats-gay-marriage-bill-176.html#post1058523374

Anderssen, N., Amlie, C., & Ytteroy, E. A. (2002). Outcomes for children with lesbian or gay parents: A review of studies from 1978 to 2000. Scandinavian Journal of Psychology, 43, 335-351.

Reviewed 23 empirical studies published between 1978 and 2000 on nonclinical children raised by lesbian mothers or gay fathers (one Belgian/Dutch, one Danish, three British, and 18 North American). Twenty studies reported on offspring of lesbian mothers, and three on offspring of gay fathers. The studies encompassed a total of 615 offspring (age range 1.5-44 yrs.) of lesbian mothers or gay fathers and 387 controls, who were assessed by psychological tests, questionnaires, or interviews. Seven types of outcomes were found to be typical: emotional functioning, sexual preference, stigmatization, gender role behavior, behavioral adjustment, gender identity, and cognitive functioning. Children raised by lesbian mothers or gay fathers did not systematically differ from other children on any of the outcomes. The studies indicate that children raised by lesbian women do not experience adverse outcomes compared with other children. The same holds for children raised by gay men, but more studies should be done.

Gottman, J. S. (1990). Children of gay and lesbian parents. In F. W. Bozett & M. B. Sussman (Eds.), Homosexuality and family relations (pp. 177-196). New York: Harrington Park Press.

Reviews research literature on children of homosexual (HS) parents, including comparisons with children of heterosexual parents. Children of HS parents did not appear deviant in gender identity, sexual orientation, or social adjustment. Issues that emerged during their upbringing related more to society's rejection of homosexuality than to poor parent-child relationships. Most social adjustment problems occurred in both groups and were commonly related to family history of divorce. Results are supported by J. Schwartz's (unpublished manuscript) investigation of the above variables in adult-aged daughters in relation to mothers' sexual orientations, with a focus on role modeling theory.

Kleber, D. J., Howell, R. J., & Tibbits-Kleber, A. L. (1986). The impact of parental homosexuality in child custody cases: A review of the literature. Bulletin of the American Academy of Psychiatry and Law, 14, 81-87.

Reviews the literature on the impact of parental homosexuality in child custody cases. As a result of the relatively high rate of divorce in the United States and the increasing awareness that many parents (an estimated 1.5 million) are homosexual, the courts and divorce mediators have become actively involved in child custody placement decisions involving homosexual parents. While custody decisions have tended to reflect stereotyped beliefs or fears concerning the detrimental effects of homosexual parenting practices on child development, the research literature provides no evidence substantiating these fears. Several specific custody issues are discussed as well as social factors relevant to lesbian motherhood.

Victor, S. B., & Fish, M. C. (1995). Lesbian mothers and their children: A review for school psychologists. School Psychology Review, 24, 456-479.

Reviews 56 studies (published from 1971 to 1994) on lesbian mothers and their children. Three main family patterns and some common misconceptions about these families are addressed. Research suggests there are no differences between children of lesbians and children of heterosexuals with regard to their emotional health, interpersonal relationships, sexual orientation, or gender development. Psychological adjustment and parenting skills were not significantly different for lesbian and heterosexual mothers. Implications for school psychology practice and training are discussed.


Bigner, J. J., & Jacobsen, R. B. (1989b). Parenting behaviors of homosexual and heterosexual fathers. In F. W. Bozett (Ed.), Homosexuality and the family (pp. 173-186). New York: Harrington Park Press.


Compared the responses of 33 homosexual (HMS) fathers with those of 33 heterosexual (HTS) fathers on the Iowa Parent Behavior Inventory. HMS subjects did not differ significantly from HTS subjects in their reported degree of involvement or in intimacy level with children. HMS subjects tended to be more strict and more responsive to children's needs and provided reasons for appropriate behavior to children more consistently than HTS subjects. Possible explanations for these similarities and differences in parenting styles are explored.

Bos, H. M. W., van Balen, F., & van den Boom, D. C. (2004). Experience of parenthood, couple relationship, social support, and child-rearing goals in planned lesbian mother families. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 45, 755-764.

The phenomenon of planned lesbian families is relatively new. The overall aim of this research was to examine whether planned lesbian mother families differ from heterosexual families on factors that are assumed to influence the parent-child relationship, such as experience of parenthood, child-rearing goals, couple relationship, and social support. One hundred lesbian two-mother families were compared with 100 heterosexual families having naturally conceived children. A variety of measures were used to collect the data, including questionnaires and a diary of activities kept by the parents. Lesbian parents are no less competent or more burdened than heterosexual parents. Both lesbian and heterosexual parents consider it important to develop qualities of independence in their children. However, "conformity" as a childrearing goal is less important to lesbian mothers. Furthermore, lesbian social mothers feel more often than fathers in heterosexual families that they must justify the quality of their parenthood. There are few differences between lesbian couples and heterosexual couples, except that lesbian mothers appear less attuned to traditional child-rearing goals and lesbian social mothers appear more to defend their position as mother.

Flaks, D., Ficher, I., Masterpasqua, F., & Joseph, G. (1995). Lesbians choosing motherhood: A comparative study of lesbian and heterosexual parents and their children. Developmental Psychology, 31, 104-114.

Compared 15 lesbian couples and the 3- to 9-year-old children born to them through donor insemination with 15 matched, heterosexual-parent families. A variety of assessment measures were used to evaluate the children's cognitive functioning and behavioral adjustment as well as the parents' relationship quality and parenting skills. Results revealed no significant differences between the two groups of children, who also compared favorably with the standardization samples for the instruments used. In addition, no significant differences were found between dyadic adjustment of lesbian and heterosexual couples. Only in the area of parenting did the two groups of couples differ: Lesbian couples exhibited more parenting awareness skills than did heterosexual couples. The implications of these findings are discussed.

 
Here is the rest:

McPherson, D. (1993). Gay parenting couples: Parenting arrangements, arrangement satisfaction, and relationship satisfaction. Unpublished doctoral dissertation, Pacific Graduate School of Psychology.

Twenty-eight gay male parenting couples and 27 heterosexual parenting couples from across the United States participated in a study comparing gay parenting couples and heterosexual parenting couples. Gay parenting couples are already existing gay couples into which a child has been brought prior to the child's 9-month birthday and in which the child is presently being reared. Parents' division of labor and satisfaction with their division of labor was assessed using Cowan and Cowan's Who Does What? Relationship satisfaction was assessed using a single question on relationship satisfaction and Spanier's 32-item Dyadic Adjustment Scale (DAS). Results revealed gay parenting couples demonstrate significantly more equitable arrangements of parenting tasks and roles and significantly greater satisfaction with those arrangements than the heterosexual parenting couples. A single question on relationship satisfaction revealed no significant difference between groups in reported satisfaction, while the 32-item DAS revealed the gay parenting couples to be significantly more satisfied with their relationships than the heterosexual couples, especially in the area of dyadic cohesion and affective expression. Post-hoc testing revealed a gender difference: Women reported significantly greater dissatisfaction with parenting arrangements than their husbands or gay parents. Findings are explained in terms of three factors unique to the experience and social setting of gay parenting couples.

Miller, B. (1979). Gay fathers and their children. Family Coordinator, 28, 544-552.

Presents data from a 3-year study on the quality and nature of the relationships of homosexual fathers with their children. In-depth interviews were conducted with a snowball sample of 40 gay fathers and 14 of their children. Uses a cross-national sample: Interviews were conducted in large and small cities in both Canada and the United States. Excluded from the study were men who no longer saw their children. Fathers were aged from 24 to 64, and the children who were interviewed ranged from 14 to 33 years of age. Addresses the nature of the father-child relationship and the children's adjustment to their father's homosexuality. Four issues frequently raised in custody cases are discussed: Do gay fathers have children to cover their homosexuality, do they molest their children, do their children turn out to be gay in disproportionate numbers, and does having a gay father expose a child to homophobic harassment. Concludes that concerns that gay fathers will have a negative impact on their children's development are unfounded.

Golombok, S., Spencer, A., & Rutter, M. (1983). Children in lesbian and single-parent households: Psychosexual and psychiatric appraisal. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 24, 551-572.

Compared the psychosexual development, emotions, behavior, and relationships of 37 children (aged 5-17 yrs.) reared in 27 lesbian households with 38 children (aged 5-27 yrs.) reared in 27 heterosexual single-parent households. Systematic standardized interviews with the mothers and with the children, together with parent and teacher questionnaires, were used to make the psychosexual and psychiatric assessments. The two groups did not differ in terms of their gender identity, sex-role behavior, or sexual orientation. Also, they did not differ on most measures of emotions, behavior, and relationships, although there was some indication of more frequent psychiatric problems in the single-parent group. It is concluded that rearing in a lesbian household per se does not lead to atypical psychosexual development or constitute a psychiatric risk factor.

Kirkpatrick, M., Smith, C., & Roy, R. (1981). Lesbian mothers and their children: A comparative survey. American Journal of Orthopsychiatry, 51, 545-551.

Forty 5- to 12-year-olds, divided equally into groups according to their mothers' sexual choice and within group by sex, were assessed with a developmental history, WISC scores, the Holtzman Inkblot Technique, and the Human Figure Drawing test. Subjects' gender development was not identifiably different in the two groups. Prevalence of disturbance was not found to be a function of the mother's sexual choice.
 
The studies posted suffer from major problems of convenience sampling, asking questions about children during childhood and not adulthood, not asking the children themselves, not controlling for lurking variables, being conducted by biased researchers, and comparing to single heterosexual parents and not just married heterosexual and biological parents.

Here I will quote from a far more recent (2012) and comprehensive study:

However, small sample sizes can contribute to “no differences” conclusions. It is not surprising that statistically-significant differences would not emerge in studies employing as few as 18 or 33 or 44 cases of respondents with same-sex parents, respectively

Beginning at the top of Table 2, the marriage rates of LMs and GFs (those who reported that their father had a gay relationship) are statistically comparable to IBFs, while LMs’ cohabitation rate is notable higher than IBFs’ (24% vs. 9%, respectively). Sixty-nine (69) percent of LMs and 57% of GFs reported that their family received public assistance at some point while growing up, compared with 17% of IBFs; 38% of LMs said they are currently receiving some form of public assistance, compared with 10% of IBFs. Just under half of all IBFs reported being employed full-time at present, compared with 26% of LMs. While only 8% of IBF respondents said they were currently unemployed, 28% of LM respondents said the same. LMs were statistically less likely than IBFs to have voted in the 2008 presidential election (41% vs. 57%), and more than twice as likely—19% vs. 8%—to report being currently (or within the past year) in counseling or therapy “for a problem connected with anxiety, depression, relationships, etc.,” an outcome that was significantly different after including control variables.

How different are the adult children of parents who have same-sex relationships? Findings from the New Family Structures Study
The article is behind a paywall, so either get yourself to a library or ask me if you have a specific question.

There is much more, but I'd rather not get into copyright issues. I will just highlight the fields where children from gay couples tend to have statistically significant higher rates:
Marijuana use
Frequency of smoking
Frequency of watching tv
Frequency of having been arrested
Frequency of female sex partners (among women)
Frequency of male sex partners (among women)
CES-D Depression index
Current relationship in trouble

And fields where children of gay couples tend to have statistically significant lower rates:
Education attainment
Family of origin safety/security
Self-reported physical health (only for lesbian mothers)
Level of household income
 
The studies posted suffer from major problems of convenience sampling, asking questions about children during childhood and not adulthood, not asking the children themselves, not controlling for lurking variables, being conducted by biased researchers, and comparing to single heterosexual parents and not just married heterosexual and biological parents.

This statement boils down to: You don't understand the purpose of these studies or the questions being asked and the conclusions so you've decided to wave a magic wand and make them all inadmissible.

Here I will quote from a far more recent (2012) and comprehensive study:

How different are the adult children of parents who have same-sex relationships? Findings from the New Family Structures Study
The article is behind a paywall, so either get yourself to a library or ask me if you have a specific question.

There is much more, but I'd rather not get into copyright issues. I will just highlight the fields where children from gay couples tend to have statistically significant higher rates:
Marijuana use
Frequency of smoking
Frequency of watching tv
Frequency of having been arrested
Frequency of female sex partners (among women)
Frequency of male sex partners (among women)
CES-D Depression index
Current relationship in trouble

None of these are factors in denying heterosexuals marriage. So they're irrelevant to the debate. :shrug:

And fields where children of gay couples tend to have statistically significant lower rates:
Education attainment
Family of origin safety/security
Self-reported physical health (only for lesbian mothers)
Level of household income

If this is the standard for denying marriage to same sex couples, black people are going to have a hard time getting married.
 
This statement boils down to: You don't understand the purpose of these studies or the questions being asked and the conclusions so you've decided to wave a magic wand and make them all inadmissible.

No, I pointed out major flaws in the studies, and then offered a better study that doesn't have these faults.

None of these are factors in denying heterosexuals marriage. So they're irrelevant to the debate. :shrug:

If this is the standard for denying marriage to same sex couples, black people are going to have a hard time getting married.
Isn't it funny how you can post studies that come to opposite conclusions and that's great evidence for why gays should get married, yet when I post a study that comes to the opposite conclusion it is suddenly irrelevant.

I've said nothing about letting gays get married. Having kids, however, seems to be a much thornier issue than gay activists are willing to admit.
 
No, I pointed out major flaws in the studies, and then offered a better study that doesn't have these faults.

Isn't it funny how you can post studies that come to opposite conclusions and that's great evidence for why gays should get married, yet when I post a study that comes to the opposite conclusion it is suddenly irrelevant.

I've said nothing about letting gays get married. Having kids, however, seems to be a much thornier issue than gay activists are willing to admit.

The problem is that whether or not the kids of gays have more problems or not, it's not up to society, you or religion, to decide whether gays should have kids. :shrug: It goes against every kind of Libertarian concept on the matter.
 
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Finally some sanity.

Children do not have a right to any particular familial arrangement. If they did, divorce would be illegal. So would getting pregnant out of wedlock. So would adoption by single parents. So on and so forth. This right spoken of by this idiot is a complete fabrication.

Nearly all children of LGBT folks are wanted children. They are almost never accidents that happened on a careless dalliance.

And, if marriage was about children, all couples would be required to give birth to, or otherwise acquire children in order to complete the marriage process. It really wouldn't be that hard to make it so. We don't do it because that isn't what marriage is.
 
Kids should have no impact on the discussion about gay marriage for another reason (besides the fact that having kids is not and has never been a requirement for getting married, as already pointed out here)

Gay people have kids anyway...married or not. Yes, they reproduce, all the time. The men father kids and the women have babies. Just like any other people, they do it within and outside of committed relationships. The kids are there, one way or another. Seems like a committed relationship, like marriage, would be better in general.
 
The problem is that whether or not the kids of gays have more problems or not, it's not up to society, you or religion, to decide whether gays should have kids. :shrug: It goes against every kind of Libertarian concept on the matter.

As I just posted, gays still have kids, just like straight people, whether or not they are married. People reproduce, period. The kids are there.

(Not disagreeing with you, just commenting)
 
The problem is that whether or not the kids of gays have more problems or not, it's not up to society, you or religion, to decide whether gays should have kids. :shrug: It goes against every kind of Libertarian concept on the matter.

Why don't you tell me what the libertarian position on children is then, since you apparently know it so well.
 
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