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Tell me, which of these facts do you disagree with?
1. Two gay men who are HIV negative and who are monogamous with each other can never give each other HIV no matter how much anal sex they have with one another.
2. Having anal sex does not lead to HIV; having anal sex with someone who is infected with HIV can lead to HIV.
3. Both homosexuals and heterosexuals practice anal sex.
4. Both homosexuals and heterosexuals can practice bad judgment and engage in promiscuous, unprotected sex, thereby increasing their chances of coming in contact with someone infected with HIV.
5. Both homosexuals and heterosexuals can practice good judgment and engage in monogamous sex, and refrain from unprotected sex until they know their partner is clean. If they do so, then regardless of their sexual orientation, they will not get or spread HIV.
I'll wait to hear which ones you disagree with, because that is all I am saying. Anal sex alone, whether heterosexual or homosexual, will not cause HIV, so it doesn't matter to me whether or not you perceive it synonymous with homosexuality. You can only get HIV from coming in contact with an HIV positive person and then engaging in risky behaviors like anal sex.
I thoroughly agree with your simplistic examples which have nothing to do with this argument.