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Thread: Gay sperm donor told to pay child maintenance for 'his' two children

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    Gay sperm donor told to pay child maintenance for 'his' two children

    gay man from Essex who donated his sperm to enable a lesbian couple to have two children, but who was never named on their birth certificate and had no role in their upbringing, is being forced by the Child Support Agency to pay for their support 13 years after the first child was born.

    Mark Langridge, who has been with his partner for 16 years (and in a civil partnership for the last five), has called on the government to review the law after the CSA suddenly demanded that he start paying 26 a week for two children he technically fathered over a decade ago.

    He has had no contact with the family since 2004, but the CSA said that he has to either pay up, or take a DNA test to show that he is not their natural father.

    Gay sperm donor told to pay child maintenance for 'his' two children | Money | The Guardian


    If I were the judge I'm not sure how I'd rule. If you tell this guy he isn't responsible for supporting his kids, how do you tell the heteros in the same situation that they are responsible for their kids?

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    Re: Gay sperm donor told to pay child maintenance for 'his' two children

    Quote Originally Posted by swing_voter View Post
    If I were the judge I'm not sure how I'd rule. If you tell this guy he isn't responsible for supporting his kids, how do you tell the heteros in the same situation that they are responsible for their kids?
    I don't think he should be responsible as a sperm donor. If, as a hetero, you have sex with someone and she gets pregnant, that's something different altogether


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    Re: Gay sperm donor told to pay child maintenance for 'his' two children

    Quote Originally Posted by swing_voter View Post
    If I were the judge I'm not sure how I'd rule. If you tell this guy he isn't responsible for supporting his kids, how do you tell the heteros in the same situation that they are responsible for their kids?
    He screwed up by not demanding a release of all liability for his "donation" AND.... and this the very important part----- having a doctor handle the "transaction". This happens from time to time because people think they are helping someone out and then they want to save money on the expense of having it done properly. So from the court's perspective there is no way they can prove the child was not the result of a mutual relationship for sex between two people. Something that will NOT ever get a man off from his duty to pay child support.

    But doing it the right way is important to the couple who wanted the child too. Otherwise at some point the donor, or even the donors spouse in the event of the death of the donor, could make legal court claim for partial custody of a child.

    Hate to say it, but may there is a lesson here.

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    Re: Gay sperm donor told to pay child maintenance for 'his' two children

    Quote Originally Posted by swing_voter View Post
    If I were the judge I'm not sure how I'd rule. If you tell this guy he isn't responsible for supporting his kids, how do you tell the heteros in the same situation that they are responsible for their kids?
    His sexual orientation is entirely irrelevant and the mothers is only indirectly relevant since she couldn’t legally access formal sperm donation facilities at the time, which grant donors the legal protection being sought here.

    While I can sympathise with the situation, I’m not sure how the law could be written to only encompasses unofficial sperm donors. How do you prove a child was born from an unofficial sperm donation agreement rather than a one-night stand?

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    Re: Gay sperm donor told to pay child maintenance for 'his' two children

    Quote Originally Posted by swing_voter View Post
    If I were the judge I'm not sure how I'd rule. If you tell this guy he isn't responsible for supporting his kids, how do you tell the heteros in the same situation that they are responsible for their kids?
    You don't. This has nothing to do with being gay. If a heterosexual man voluntarily donated his sperm and made it clear he wanted no part in the upbringing he should not be required to pay up either.
    Obstruction of Justice also applies to overt coercion of court or government officials via the means of threats or actual physical harm and also applying to deliberate sedition against a court official to undermine the appearance of legitimate authority.

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    Re: Gay sperm donor told to pay child maintenance for 'his' two children

    Quote Originally Posted by swing_voter View Post
    If I were the judge I'm not sure how I'd rule. If you tell this guy he isn't responsible for supporting his kids, how do you tell the heteros in the same situation that they are responsible for their kids?
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    Re: Gay sperm donor told to pay child maintenance for 'his' two children

    Quote Originally Posted by Rising Sun View Post
    It's Britain. Is it really any wonder why our ancestors left then booted them out of our country?
    This sort of thing happens here also.

    It's preposterous. The parents should be paying. The only time I support forcing a non-marital party to pay for child support is when the father is someone who the wife had an affair with.

    In fact, it makes no sense. How can you say the paternal father is off the hook and the presumptive dad who njever knew of the infidelity is on the hook, but the donor has to pay?

    Makes NO SENSE.
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    Re: Gay sperm donor told to pay child maintenance for 'his' two children

    Quote Originally Posted by Obscurity View Post
    This sort of thing happens here also.

    It's preposterous. The parents should be paying. The only time I support forcing a non-marital party to pay for child support is when the father is someone who the wife had an affair with.

    In fact, it makes no sense. How can you say the paternal father is off the hook and the presumptive dad who njever knew of the infidelity is on the hook, but the donor has to pay?

    Makes NO SENSE.
    Link?

    Agreed that under these circumstances the sperm (or egg) donor bears no responsibility for the child.
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    Re: Gay sperm donor told to pay child maintenance for 'his' two children

    A lot to the story, history, law then and now, unofficial agreement, the ick factor of inseminating oneself with sperm by someone without having a health check first, then this

    A few years later his relationship with the mother and her female partner started to deteriorate, to the point where he no longer saw them or their daughters. He received the occasional letter from the girls, to which he replied.

    What he did not know was that the lesbian couple split up, leaving one of the mothers with both children, who later sought support from the state.
    Why did the article explicitly mention gay/lesbian? Perhaps to ascertain there was no hanky panky.





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    Re: Gay sperm donor told to pay child maintenance for 'his' two children

    If it was agreed up front this was only being a sperm donor to have not role in the child's life from the start, there should be no child support. How is this any different that using an anonymous sperm bank - other than in the latter instance you know almost nothing about the donor's health and other specifics?
    With that ruling, why didn't the court just go ahead and outlaw lesbians having children since that is the clear goal.

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