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Record Support for Gay Marriage[W:162:334]

Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

disneydude said:
Oh....its over. The dominoes are falling faster and faster every day. This one is in the old refridgerator.
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Gay marriage, maybe. But that wasn't the Berlin Wall you guys made it out to be. It's more under the category of "Seriously?" than anything.

But if you're expecting it to be just as normal as traditional marriage, you're living in a dream. It won't because it simply isn't, and cant be.
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

Erod said:
Instead, they get to figure out, then explain to their friends and girlfriends, the dynamics of it all.

I'm glad your kids are loved and cared for. But I also think they've got hurdles ahead with their own relationships that they can't understand or contemplate right now. And if you take that challenge on like a gay-marriage political battle, you'll all suffer for it and it won't end well. You wave that gay flag in the face of everything and everyone who challenges or makes judgments your kids' way, and you'll do them a great disservice.

Because it ain't about you anymore when you have kids.

.
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I'm not worried about it. Kids these days are much more open than their parents generation. The kids/parents we encounter in school and soccer games don't even bat an eye. I'm not naive enough to believe that they aren't going to encounter some ass hole one day that is going to make an issue of things for them, but they will be strong enough to know how to deal with people like that.
And by the way....I'm not a big political activist. I don't fly a gay flag...but I don't hide or pretend that we are something different than what we are. I have come to realize that the vast majority of people in America are good people, who really don't care who you love or marry. Most people I encounter, judge me, my husband and our family on the content of our character, not our sexual organs. We are friends with practically every home on our block and everyone is accepting of us and its never been the slightest issue.

And believe me....I know it isn't about me anymore.....my life has gone from being almost all about me and my work, to being almost solely about my three kids.
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

Erod said:
Gay marriage, maybe. But that wasn't the Berlin Wall you guys made it out to be. It's more under the category of "Seriously?" than anything.

But if you're expecting it to be just as normal as traditional marriage, you're living in a dream. It won't because it simply isn't, and cant be.
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It already is. Don't kid yourself.
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

Erod said:
Geez, dude, can you read? Did I ever say I love my biological kids more? If you don't think adopted kids require special considerations initially and along the way, then God help your kids.

I don't have to over-explain, and re-explain, this much with my wife. LOL
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I hope I am wrong...and I know you didn't SAY it...but it certainly comes across that way, even subtley. I believe that you say that you don't love them any more...I just hope that you really don't.
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

disneydude said:
I've seen it firsthand with my boys. They have 3 older sisters that are in an adoptive home with a male/female couple that have their own two biological daughters. It disgusts me when we go to their house. The two biological daughters have the best of everything. The three adopted girls are constantly told that "this is what the money the state gives us will provide for you". We met them at Disneyland. The two biological daughters got stuff that the others didn't...to the point, that I finally had enough and went and bought them stuff to make up for it.
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I've got to call BS on that, or at least those are the worst adoptive parents I've ever heard of. If anything, the tendency is to overcompensate for the adopted kids, something we are really careful not to do. It's natural to feel the need to because you want them to feel your love more to reassure them since they don't look like you. But you can't or you inadvertently call attention to it.

The same with your kids relationship to each other. You've got to let it develop without intervening. You can't force it.

And I've got to ask, why did you split the kids from their sisters? That bond needs to remain. Kids are not draft picks.
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

Erod said:
Gay marriage, maybe. But that wasn't the Berlin Wall you guys made it out to be. It's more under the category of "Seriously?" than anything.

But if you're expecting it to be just as normal as traditional marriage, you're living in a dream. It won't because it simply isn't, and cant be.
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if what you mean by normal is simply common then your right.

if what you mean about normal is being as widely accepted then your wrong

the anti gay marriage crowed has tried their best to tell us why its some how bad to have gay marriage and its their great failure in doing so that's causing this change to occur

so some day most people may simply not care if your gay or married to some one of the same gender
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

disneydude said:
I hope I am wrong...and I know you didn't SAY it...but it certainly comes across that way, even subtley. I believe that you say that you don't love them any more...I just hope that you really don't.
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Not in the slightest. Frankly, I don't even think about it much anymore. I don't feel any differently when they do well in school or play well in athletics, or anything.

But at first, it is different. You have to consider things you wouldn't otherwise. You have to understand they feel differently at times. They're not stupid, and you're not immediately their parents. You're just the boss at first. You become dad later on. It's more up to them than you, unlike your biological kid who were stuck with you from the get go.
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

blarg said:
or get together with like minded people and expose why that kind of discrimination has no rational or legal basis.
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They have been trying to do that already. I don't buy their case and it seems to run counter to known sciences.
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

blarg said:
if what you mean by normal is simply common then your right.

if what you mean about normal is being as widely accepted then your wrong

the anti gay marriage crowed has tried their best to tell us why its some how bad to have gay marriage and its their great failure in doing so that's causing this change to occur

so some day most people may simply not care if your gay or married to some one of the same gender
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In very small circles, maybe. You're living in small circles.
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

Erod said:
I've got to call BS on that, or at least those are the worst adoptive parents I've ever heard of. If anything, the tendency is to overcompensate for the adopted kids, something we are really careful not to do. It's natural to feel the need to because you want them to feel your love more to reassure them since they don't look like you. But you can't or you inadvertently call attention to it.

The same with your kids relationship to each other. You've got to let it develop without intervening. You can't force it.

And I've got to ask, why did you split the kids from their sisters? That bond needs to remain. Kids are not draft picks.
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The sisters were already adopted out. They were placed in different foster homes. I'm not sure why. Normally they try to keep them together, but perhaps because it was such a large family, they were split up. There are actually 3 other kids who are even older, who were placed in seperate foster homes, but have since emancipated.

As far as the situation I talked about. It is absolutely true. I'm friends with the mom on facebook. You go to her facebook...it is all about her two biological daughters. Every now and then there is a mention of the 3 adoptive girls or a photo. The two biological kids are enrolled in soccer clubs and they are constantly running around to games all weekend. The three adoptive girls, none of them are in soccer (now...I'll be honest, I don't know if they chose not to be, didn't want to be...or what. But judging from everything else I've seen in the family, I think it was not an option for them).

We drive almost 90 miles each way out to Riverside once a month or so, so that they can see their sisters. They have driven out to LA twice in the last 3 years to reciprocate. Its just not important to them.
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

Erod said:
It's just not a big deal. If they want to play house, let them play house.

But this will hardly be the end of it. No one invents reasons to play the victim card like the gay community. I swear, they're convinced their ancestors were slaves, too.
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Pretty sure blacks and women got labeled the same way. I mean, after all...what did women have to complain about? They got completely taken care of, didnt have to be responsible for anything, what more did they want?
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

disneydude said:
The sisters were already adopted out. They were placed in different foster homes. I'm not sure why. Normally they try to keep them together, but perhaps because it was such a large family, they were split up. There are actually 3 other kids who are even older, who were placed in seperate foster homes, but have since emancipated.

As far as the situation I talked about. It is absolutely true. I'm friends with the mom on facebook. You go to her facebook...it is all about her two biological daughters. Every now and then there is a mention of the 3 adoptive girls or a photo. The two biological kids are enrolled in soccer clubs and they are constantly running around to games all weekend. The three adoptive girls, none of them are in soccer (now...I'll be honest, I don't know if they chose not to be, didn't want to be...or what. But judging from everything else I've seen in the family, I think it was not an option for them).

We drive almost 90 miles each way out to Riverside once a month or so, so that they can see their sisters. They have driven out to LA twice in the last 3 years to reciprocate. Its just not important to them.
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So this is nine biological kids from the same parents that have no relationship with their real parents? What happened to them, if I may ask?
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

Henrin said:
Oh boo hoo, we can't adopt children. Cry me a river baby. Cry cry cry..
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Oh boo hoo, women get preferential treatment in child custody and child support. Cry me a river baby. Cry cry cry....
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

blarg said:
so some day most people may simply not care if your gay or married to some one of the same gender
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They already don't. Even in Utah....one of the most conservative places in the US. We were there on a ski trip over the Christmas Holidays. This was during the height of the gay marriage fight there recently. We must have had a dozen people come up to us every day we were there, in restaurants, at the ski resorts, at the hotel...who saw me, my husband and our kids and came out of their way to tell us that they support us, are fighting for us, etc. At first it was a little strange, but after the first couple of days, I realized that people see that we are obviously a gay parent family and want us to know that the straight world, by and large, out there are in full support of us, our unions and our families. It gave me a lot of hope for the future.
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

Lursa said:
Pretty sure blacks and women got labeled the same way. I mean, after all...what did women have to complain about? They got completely taken care of, didnt have to be responsible for anything, what more did they want?
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Good gosh, stop comparing gays to the plights of slaves. So getting formally married (versus a civil union) is akin to forced labor and post whippings?

And last I checked, gay people have been working and voting for a long, long time.

Little dramatic, don't you think?
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

Erod said:
And with that, dude, you can go eff yourself. Did I call adopted kids "inferior"? Do you think I consider my daughter inferior? You are the strawman champion of all time. Just how many can you create in an hour?

You're here all the stinking time. You don't work apparently, or certainly don't win the bread, so no wonder husband-wife roles are so inconvenient for you. You gotta be a man to feel like one, I suppose.

An adoptive family is different, not inferior. And until you have the balls to adopt a child, you should stop talking out your ass.
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Thank you I have been telling him that for years.
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

Lursa said:
Oh boo hoo, women get preferential treatment in child custody and child support. Cry me a river baby. Cry cry cry....
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That is a completely different issue where rights to the child are already established.
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

Erod said:
So this is nine biological kids from the same parents that have no relationship with their real parents? What happened to them, if I may ask?
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Its more complicated than that. My two sons and two sisters have the same biological mother/father. The other 4 kids obviously have the same mother, but there are two other fathers. 8 Kids total.

In response to your second question. My boys have a great relationship with their "real parents", because we are their REAL PARENTS. If you mean "bio mom and dad"...they have no relationship. Father lives in Vegas and has been out of the picture for years. Mother had her parental rights terminated about 3 years ago, which allowed us to adopt the boys. Now...if the bio mom or dad comes to us in the future and wants to have a relationship with the kids I would say, "HELL NO", if my boys on the otherhand want to seek out the biological parents and have a relationship with them, I would absolutely do everything in my power to assist them in doing so. But it has to come from them.
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

disneydude said:
Its more complicated than that. My two sons and two sisters have the same biological mother/father. The other 4 kids obviously have the same mother, but there are two other fathers. 7 Kids total.

In response to your second question. My boys have a great relationship with their "real parents", because we are their REAL PARENTS. If you mean "bio mom and dad"...they have no relationship. Father lives in Vegas and has been out of the picture for years. Mother had her parental rights terminated about 3 years ago, which allowed us to adopt the boys. Now...if the bio mom or dad comes to us in the future and wants to have a relationship with the kids I would say, "HELL NO", if my boys on the otherhand want to seek out the biological parents and have a relationship with them, I would absolutely do everything in my power to assist them in doing so. But it has to come from them.
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Lol, adopted parents are never the kids REAL PARENTS. Fun to dream though.
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

Henrin said:
Lol, adopted parents are never the kids REAL PARENTS. Fun to dream though.
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Not my experience. I know many adoptive kids/families who would say otherwise.
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

disneydude said:
I always view NP as "Angry Dad" from the Simpsons.....when you do that....his posts make complete sense.
Angry Dad - YouTube
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Well, being on the left, I guess it's just in you nature to mislead, isn't it? As I'm sure you know, I didn't ask how many kids your friends had. And, I can see that when you base your opinions on your friends, it's a completely flawed opinion because they don't represent anything close to a slice of society as a whole. Thanks for the tell.
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

Henrin said:
Lol, adopted parents are never the kids REAL PARENTS. Fun to dream though.
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Shooting a sperm or popping out a baby doesn't make you a parent.....
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

disneydude said:
Not my experience. I know many adoptive kids/families who would say otherwise.
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People saying something is a certain way and it actually being that way are different things.
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

disneydude said:
Shooting a sperm or popping out a baby doesn't make you a parent.....
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Yeah, it does, but again, it's really awesome to dream. Of course, just carrying the kid doesn't mean squat to the equation. A woman that carries another womans kid is not the mother of the kid.
 
Re: Record Support for Gay Marriage

Anthony60 said:
Well, being on the left, I guess it's just in you nature to mislead, isn't it? As I'm sure you know, I didn't ask how many kids your friends had. And, I can see that when you base your opinions on your friends, it's a completely flawed opinion because they don't represent anything close to a slice of society as a whole. Thanks for the tell.
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Dude....I was responding to your post.

Anthony60 said:
Hmmm, how about the number of pregnancies between your gay and straight friends, is that "exactly the same" too?
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Memory problem....or just a reading comprehension one?

DOH!!!!!!!
 
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