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Really?

So today is my birthday. I go out to the mailbox and, among other cards, I get a card from Tom. A mushy birthday card signed, "Love Tom Always." Just the way he's signed my cards for 18 years. I burst into tears.

Those of you who have followed my blog...what's your take?
 
I know you love him, but you also know she is pulling his strings. Don't let her use you.

God BLess
 
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He changed but that old him is still in there someplace, we always eat our former selves, they are always part of who we are.

How much of that old him is still there who can say.

But seriously Mags, he made his choice.

Now you need to honor it.

Its time for you.
 
Maybe it is genuine, but he's already gone and burned down that bridge with you Mags. He already admitted to you that he wanted the house from you.

I can't say this enough, but the fact that your in this kind of situation, at this point in your life, is just heartbreaking.
 
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Put a restraining order on his lying, manipulating butt. He wants the house, Mags. After all he has said and done to you, to hell with Tom. He is one heartless bastard. Or if like pain then allow him to keep messing with your head.
 
As hard as it will be you need to keep him away his presence will not be healthy for you long term
 
Listen to Risky. That's my opinion.
 
I think he is a manipulative, pathological liar. I think his girlfriend is the same.
 
First, a belated Happy Birthday, Maggie!

Second, everyone's comments are correct. He's exposed who he is in the here and now. Everyone changes, and he changed into someone who left you "in sickness" - a broken promise.

You made the right call. It's painful, but I hope you can be happy that he left little doubt as to how right you were to axe him from inheriting anything.
 
First, a Belated Happy Birthday! Maybe you have put your Ego in check and you don't feel comfortable with your Star Status?
Now on to a few more comments - I picture you still very, very, hurt, routine in shambles, very vulnerable and lip syncing to Lady Gaga's "Million Reasons" song..hoping beyond hope to find that one good reason to let Tom back into your life. Your physical and emotional state impair your judgment.
I can only think of only one good reason: Tom, in the heat of frustration, has taken the life of the other woman and now faces a life in prison. Thereafter, you can give him doses of love and charity on your terms.

Maggie, Maggie, (NOW SHOUTING!) MAGGIE.... THINK! If you forgive Tom, picture your DP Family collectively shaking their heads! Too often, against all logic, a woman returns to her abuser!
Feel some Love!
[video=youtube;WYRJ-ryPEu0]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WYRJ-ryPEu0[/video]
 
I say to burn it and make a little ceremony of it. If you have anything more of his to add, even better.
 
All such good advice. All the same. I know you're right. And yet it is soooo hard. I keep reminding myself that I'm just mourning the guy I thought he was. And that guy is dead. It helps.

He actually went on Facebook today. Liked a post of mine about the shed you may have seen on here. It almost pleases me because I think it is either still part of their plan OR he is really finding that the green grass he thought he saw was filled with weeds. I'm completely ignoring everything...the card and the Facebook and anything to come.

I'm counseling with a social worker every Sunday evening for a while. Her expertise and insight into human behavior (including my own) is almost uncanny and very interesting.because she is a casual friend, she won't accept format payment, but we struck a deal... dinner,I provide either at my home or out, and a girlfest of feelings.

I stopped at the attorney's office yesterday to make sure my will was airtight. He assured me it was. First, he now has no standing since he's being left nothing and is not a relative. Next because of the en terrorum clause that makes him responsible for all fees should he even TRY to challenge it. So I'm comfortable there. THE Land Trust isn't part of the will, it because my home is IN that trust, no claims can be laid on it. All comforting. The atty said, "I take it, Maggie, you would spend every last dime to keep him from it." And that is tre.

My cousin has instructions that, should he try to purchase it after I'm gone when it goes up for sale, that she isn't to move off list price, demand a thirty-day close and refuse any requests for repair after the home inspection. I also told her that, should all fail and he BUY , she might consider some fish in the ductwork just before closing. I put a smiley face next to it, but if I know my cousin...

My atty is a religious guy. When I told him what Tom said to me about, "...unless you're leaving me the house, there's no reason for me to stay..." and smiled and said I'd been touched by the grace of God. That without him saying those words that cut so deep, I would have probably given him still one more chance.

I'm feeling pretty good. I have sure enjoyed you comments...
 
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