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Don't Blame 'Snowflakes,' Blame the 'Self-Esteem Craze'

Daisy

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A California lawmaker started a task force, and the idea took over US schools

Millennials are sometimes derided as sensitive "snowflakes" who have an inflated sense of self-worth. If so, don't blame them, blame the "self-esteem" movement that took over American classrooms in the 1980s and '90s, complete with mirrors engraved with phrases such as "You are now looking at one of the most special people in the whole wide world!" In New York magazine, Jesse Singal traces the roots of the movement to California and explores how it overcame early skepticism to become a booming cultural phenomenon. "As it turned out, the central claim underlying the trend, that there's a causal relationship between self-esteem and various positive outcomes, was almost certainly inaccurate," writes Singal. But by the time it caught on, the simplistic fix for all of society's ills proved too hard to resist: Boost kids' self-esteem and watch their problems melt away.

As Singal explains, one "very eccentric" state lawmaker in California, John Vasconcellos, might be considered the father of the movement. He was so convinced about the concept that he spearheaded the creation of the California Task Force to Promote Self-Esteem and Personal and Social Responsibility in 1986. It was ridiculed at first, most famously in the comic strip Doonesbury, but it not only persevered, it thrived. Generally speaking, adherents made one fundamental mistake: They viewed self-esteem as the cause of things such as good grades instead of recognizing that the reverse is more likely true: Good grades result in higher self-esteem. It wasn't until the early 2000s that psychologists produced hard evidence that Vasconcellos' ideas were bogus

Bogus Self-Esteem Movement Was Born in 1986: Longform

Full story...

How the Self-Esteem Craze Took Over America -- Science of Us
 
A California lawmaker started a task force, and the idea took over US schools



Bogus Self-Esteem Movement Was Born in 1986: Longform

Full story...

How the Self-Esteem Craze Took Over America -- Science of Us

Interesting premise regarding the origin of what I refer to as the "self centered" movement.

Certainly the massive problems facing California today can be traced back to that period, so I think the authors and researchers have made a valid point.

Rather than teach children how to overcome the many challenges life will be throwing at them, they have taught them to blame others and to accept mediocrity in themselves.
 
"Get off mah lawn, whipper-snappers!"
 
Just more entitlement mentality from Baby Boomers. "No one takes personal responsibility!" they wail, while blaming "the left" and the young for every ill in their lives. Get some self-awareness and humility, old farts, or just get out of the road.
 
One of the most mind-numbingly predictable things that human beings do is to blame young people for society-wide problems that older adults have caused. It takes less cognitive effort to do that than to literally go to sleep.
 
The only group of people I have ever seen with unwarranted self esteem is baby boomers. Who happen to be the biggest entitled bunch of snowflakes as well. They have to have their ass kissed every step of the way, or they'll throw a tantrum. They all claim to have worked hard, earned their place. But take it from someone that deals with Boomers and their financials exclusively, most inherited their tangible asset and are so deep in debt they literally could not pay it off before they die, meaning their kids won't inherit a thing from them. But unless you play along with how great they've done, they'll blow up and bite off their own nose to spite you. They have no interest in leaving a legacy, or protecting themselves. In one sentence they'll claim their kids will take care of them in their old age, and in the next claim their kids don't deserve the piece of property they've had in the family for 3 generations that they just leveraged to buy the new F150. Which they only drive to impress their other old friends. What kind of idiot living off SS tries to buy a brand new truck in their seventies? Answer, most boomers. "I'm sorry you can't afford to pay 20% of your hospital bill that medicare didn't cover, because I recommended last year you take a supplemental plan that would and you couldn't afford that because of your 400 a month truck payment. That's entirely my fault I didn't explain the risks better and convince you not to buy a brand new truck." I have literally said that sentence more times than I can count. Because if I don't take the blame, they won't let me help them. Because it could never possibly be their fault.

I could literally sit here for the next week relating horror stories of boomers ****ing themselves and their kids over, and it's mostly for pride and ego that they do it. But yeah it's millennials that have to much self esteem. Hey, whats the teen suicide rate at nowadays...
 
Well, I'm a boomer myself and one odd thing I often see is boomers using their children on social media as trophies. Mind you, I understand parents wanting to take pictures and show off their kids at graduation, prom, big events etc....but I have also seen the extreme where one of my Facebook friends took a picture of her daughter's report card and posted it on Facebook. I felt a tinge of embarrassment for her, but a few of the posts from other boomers were a little wacky. Instead of saying bravo to her daughter for her hard work, it became a trophy seeking fest for her parenting skills. There were quite a few comments about what a great parent she was for her daughter earning good grades. So, yes her daughter was a trophy for her parenting skills. Sad that people need to exploit their child to feel good about themselves.
 
Boomers gave America the "Me Generation," and is it any surprise that three generations later America gets the "Selfie Generation"? :)
 
It was a very good, very fair read. I think there's probably a lot of truth to it. These SJW monsters didn't just pop out of nowhere. They've been built through years of unrealistic views, over-inflated egos, pampering, and self-centered behavior.
 
The only group of people I have ever seen with unwarranted self esteem is baby boomers. Who happen to be the biggest entitled bunch of snowflakes as well. They have to have their ass kissed every step of the way, or they'll throw a tantrum. They all claim to have worked hard, earned their place. But take it from someone that deals with Boomers and their financials exclusively, most inherited their tangible asset and are so deep in debt they literally could not pay it off before they die, meaning their kids won't inherit a thing from them. But unless you play along with how great they've done, they'll blow up and bite off their own nose to spite you. They have no interest in leaving a legacy, or protecting themselves. In one sentence they'll claim their kids will take care of them in their old age, and in the next claim their kids don't deserve the piece of property they've had in the family for 3 generations that they just leveraged to buy the new F150. Which they only drive to impress their other old friends. What kind of idiot living off SS tries to buy a brand new truck in their seventies? Answer, most boomers. "I'm sorry you can't afford to pay 20% of your hospital bill that medicare didn't cover, because I recommended last year you take a supplemental plan that would and you couldn't afford that because of your 400 a month truck payment. That's entirely my fault I didn't explain the risks better and convince you not to buy a brand new truck." I have literally said that sentence more times than I can count. Because if I don't take the blame, they won't let me help them. Because it could never possibly be their fault.

I could literally sit here for the next week relating horror stories of boomers ****ing themselves and their kids over, and it's mostly for pride and ego that they do it. But yeah it's millennials that have to much self esteem. Hey, whats the teen suicide rate at nowadays...


I suspect you are in the wrong profession if that's how you feel about your clients.
 
Well, I'm a boomer myself and one odd thing I often see is boomers using their children on social media as trophies. Mind you, I understand parents wanting to take pictures and show off their kids at graduation, prom, big events etc....but I have also seen the extreme where one of my Facebook friends took a picture of her daughter's report card and posted it on Facebook. I felt a tinge of embarrassment for her, but a few of the posts from other boomers were a little wacky. Instead of saying bravo to her daughter for her hard work, it became a trophy seeking fest for her parenting skills. There were quite a few comments about what a great parent she was for her daughter earning good grades. So, yes her daughter was a trophy for her parenting skills. Sad that people need to exploit their child to feel good about themselves.

Facebook is full of millennials posting their kids pictures along with their accomplishments, not just boomers.
 
I suspect you are in the wrong profession if that's how you feel about your clients.

I made less money when I cared about them, I'd say the way I feel about my clients benefits us both. I'm not obligated to buy their bull****, and I don't lose any sleep if they don't take my candid advice. They don't need a friend that buys their sob story, they need someone who tells them exactly where their risk is and how to avoid it. And sometimes they need their bubble burst, otherwise they just keep fooling themselves into doing the same things over and over again.

You'd be surprised what behavior terrible people can rationalize away as necessary. After awhile, I just grew numb to it. But every once in awhile, I find a good person. But that only happens maybe 1 out 100 times. Boomers are in general terrible people, with precious few good ones scattered in.
 
The only group of people I have ever seen with unwarranted self esteem is baby boomers. Who happen to be the biggest entitled bunch of snowflakes as well. They have to have their ass kissed every step of the way, or they'll throw a tantrum. They all claim to have worked hard, earned their place. But take it from someone that deals with Boomers and their financials exclusively, most inherited their tangible asset and are so deep in debt they literally could not pay it off before they die, meaning their kids won't inherit a thing from them. But unless you play along with how great they've done, they'll blow up and bite off their own nose to spite you. They have no interest in leaving a legacy, or protecting themselves. In one sentence they'll claim their kids will take care of them in their old age, and in the next claim their kids don't deserve the piece of property they've had in the family for 3 generations that they just leveraged to buy the new F150. Which they only drive to impress their other old friends. What kind of idiot living off SS tries to buy a brand new truck in their seventies? Answer, most boomers. "I'm sorry you can't afford to pay 20% of your hospital bill that medicare didn't cover, because I recommended last year you take a supplemental plan that would and you couldn't afford that because of your 400 a month truck payment. That's entirely my fault I didn't explain the risks better and convince you not to buy a brand new truck." I have literally said that sentence more times than I can count. Because if I don't take the blame, they won't let me help them. Because it could never possibly be their fault.

I could literally sit here for the next week relating horror stories of boomers ****ing themselves and their kids over, and it's mostly for pride and ego that they do it. But yeah it's millennials that have to much self esteem. Hey, whats the teen suicide rate at nowadays...

Every generation goes through the same thing with a " x " amount of people who can't manage their finances.

The younger boomers have also lived through the era of jobs exportation and the end of the "40 years and gold watch"

Every generation will have something unique that triggers certain trends economically.
 
I made less money when I cared about them, I'd say the way I feel about my clients benefits us both. I'm not obligated to buy their bull****, and I don't lose any sleep if they don't take my candid advice. They don't need a friend that buys their sob story, they need someone who tells them exactly where their risk is and how to avoid it. And sometimes they need their bubble burst, otherwise they just keep fooling themselves into doing the same things over and over again.

You'd be surprised what behavior terrible people can rationalize away as necessary. After awhile, I just grew numb to it. But every once in awhile, I find a good person. But that only happens maybe 1 out 100 times. Boomers are in general terrible people, with precious few good ones scattered in.

Only 1 good person out of 100 huh?

You have no business working around other people with that attitude.
 
Every generation goes through the same thing with a " x " amount of people who can't manage their finances.

The younger boomers have also lived through the era of jobs exportation and the end of the "40 years and gold watch"

Every generation will have something unique that triggers certain trends economically.

Oh sure, Gen X is worse at managing money than boomers, and millennials probably even more than that. I just don't deal with those two generations so I can't offer any observations on why they are terrible at financials. If I had to bet on why millennials are though, it's probably because we are addicted to instant gratification and see having huge debt as the unavoidable norm, and we as a general rule don't ever expect to inherit anything like property so we don't prepare for it.

Boomers know better, aren't addicted to instant gratification, already inherited property, and don't see huge debt as normal. They just don't care like their own parents did about building wealth generation to generation.
 
Only 1 good person out of 100 huh?

You have no business working around other people with that attitude.

Would you rather have an FA who liked you and got you a 1.5% return on your money, or one who doesn't give a **** and brings you 5-7%?

Also consider this, I'm going to outlive every single one of my clients, liking them is a liability.
 
Interesting premise regarding the origin of what I refer to as the "self centered" movement.

Certainly the massive problems facing California today can be traced back to that period, so I think the authors and researchers have made a valid point.

Rather than teach children how to overcome the many challenges life will be throwing at them, they have taught them to blame others and to accept mediocrity in themselves.

In an article entitled "Students Spoiled Stupid" that notes that nearly half of college students believe that the feds will forgive their student loans and argues that these students aren't being prepared to succeed, psychologist and motivational speaker Terry Paulson says:

Beyond safe spaces, Harvard students want protection from the natural consequences from not returning library books on time. In response to the high stress these bright students experience from late fees, Harvard University Library has announced there are no longer late fees for students. Does shielding students from natural consequences prepare them for life? Only an irresponsible life! These students don’t just want safe spaces; they want protection from their own choices. These fragile students seem incapable of handling the freedoms they demonstrate for.

https://townhall.com/columnists/terrypaulson/2017/06/12/students-spoiled-stupid-n2339114

Stress caused by late library fees? :roll:
 
In an article entitled "Students Spoiled Stupid" that notes that nearly half of college students believe that the feds will forgive their student loans and argues that these students aren't being prepared to succeed, psychologist and motivational speaker Terry Paulson says:

Beyond safe spaces, Harvard students want protection from the natural consequences from not returning library books on time. In response to the high stress these bright students experience from late fees, Harvard University Library has announced there are no longer late fees for students. Does shielding students from natural consequences prepare them for life? Only an irresponsible life! These students don’t just want safe spaces; they want protection from their own choices. These fragile students seem incapable of handling the freedoms they demonstrate for.

https://townhall.com/columnists/terrypaulson/2017/06/12/students-spoiled-stupid-n2339114

Stress caused by late library fees? :roll:

How in the world will they ever cope with real life stress, like loss of a job, being homeless, or loss of a child or mate?
 
Just more entitlement mentality from Baby Boomers. "No one takes personal responsibility!" they wail, while blaming "the left" and the young for every ill in their lives. Get some self-awareness and humility, old farts, or just get out of the road.

Sorry, Leftists are doing all the blaming, and personal responsibility is someone else's problem. That is what they do.
 
A California lawmaker started a task force, and the idea took over US schools



Bogus Self-Esteem Movement Was Born in 1986: Longform

Full story...

How the Self-Esteem Craze Took Over America -- Science of Us

I've seen it (self-esteem craze) tied to everything from workplace violence to domestic homicide. They may be right.

If someone hasn't learned to fail, to accept that they usually will fail, especially when they reach for the stars, they begin believing that they deserve to succeed. And, then when something or someone suddenly tells you, "No, Dude. You're a loser." You flip your **** and start killing people.
 
Every generation goes through the same thing with a " x " amount of people who can't manage their finances.

The younger boomers have also lived through the era of jobs exportation and the end of the "40 years and gold watch"

Every generation will have something unique that triggers certain trends economically.

^^^This. Every...freaking...generation... And the other generations will line up to blame it on someone/something that had little or nothing to do with it.

I'm not saying that writer's piece was completely without merit, but there are many other factors at play, as there always are.
 
In an article entitled "Students Spoiled Stupid" that notes that nearly half of college students believe that the feds will forgive their student loans and argues that these students aren't being prepared to succeed, psychologist and motivational speaker Terry Paulson says:

Beyond safe spaces, Harvard students want protection from the natural consequences from not returning library books on time. In response to the high stress these bright students experience from late fees, Harvard University Library has announced there are no longer late fees for students. Does shielding students from natural consequences prepare them for life? Only an irresponsible life! These students don’t just want safe spaces; they want protection from their own choices. These fragile students seem incapable of handling the freedoms they demonstrate for.

https://townhall.com/columnists/terrypaulson/2017/06/12/students-spoiled-stupid-n2339114

Stress caused by late library fees? :roll:

:shock:

:doh

It's disappointing, and causes me some sadness that so many of todays young people have been coddled and protected from the real world. What's next, forgiving utility bills?

I truly don't understand the objective beyond what I fear may be the reasoning. It seems to me dependence on something other than oneself must be at the heart of the objective.

Taking away the individual, and making them compliant is the only end game I can rationally determine from all of this.

Take a step back and ponder that.

It should send chills down the spine of everyone who can look at it rationally.
 
How in the world will they ever cope with real life stress, like loss of a job, being homeless, or loss of a child or mate?

And remember...they'll be making medical decisions for a lot of us.
 
The "snowflake" term does accurately define a large number of the generation it is assigned to. Does that mean it is their fault? of course not, it is comes from the way they were raised. But that does not change the reality of our society.

As has been alluded to, it can be traced back to the "boomers" who, in a thriving economy, wanted their kids to have it better than they did. So we progressed from "You want ti, earn it" to "You want it, ask for it". Then as time went forward the idea of "instant gratification" came into the picture and people started accumulating debt. Considering interest rates, it turned out they were spending more and getting less. That naturally led to the various schemes of "debt forgiveness" which allowed for more "stuff" and more debt. Then throw in the idea of "no winners/no losers" and the trend continued finally producing the "snowflakes.

That is reality. The question is do we blame or do we try to find a way out of this destructive pattern? I prefer the latter but I wonder if we have not gone too far to reverse course.
 
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