A Quantum Theory of Mitt Romney

But the Romney candidacy represents literally a quantum leap forward. It is governed by rules that are bizarre and appear to go against everyday experience and common sense. To be honest, even people like Mr. Fehrnstrom who are experts in Mitt Romney’s reality, or “Romneality,” seem bewildered by its implications; and any person who tells you he or she truly “understands” Mitt Romney is either lying or a corporation.

Nevertheless, close and repeated study of his campaign in real-world situations has yielded a standard model that has proved eerily accurate in predicting Mitt Romney’s behavior in debate after debate, speech after speech, awkward look-at-me-I’m-a-regular-guy moment after awkward look-at-me-I’m-a-regular-guy moment, and every other event in his face-time continuum.

The basic concepts behind this model are:

Complementarity. In much the same way that light is both a particle and a wave, Mitt Romney is both a moderate and a conservative, depending on the situation (Fig. 1). It is not that he is one or the other; it is not that he is one and then the other. He is both at the same time.

Probability. Mitt Romney’s political viewpoints can be expressed only in terms of likelihood, not certainty. While some views are obviously far less likely than others, no view can be thought of as absolutely impossible. Thus, for instance, there is at any given moment a nonzero chance that Mitt Romney supports child slavery.

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NAKED N00B said:

Read the whole thing

An amusing and accurate depiction of the challenges Mitt Romney faces as the most likely nominee for the GOP.

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johnny_rebson said:

One of Romney's disadvantages heading towards November will be his own comments.

His own words will be used against him in 30 second political ads over and over again.

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specklebang said:

I really wish Romney would propose some useful solutions that don't focus on giving himself a tax break. I really don't hear anything but tax cuts, tax cuts and more tax cuts. IMHO this type of tax cutting is not helpful and only serves to make debt reduction ever more elusive. . Since the USG seems to insist on tying themselves to the economy, then what can the USG do to improve things? If we are going to "hire" him for his business skills, then what is he planning to do? There should be methodologies for the USG to manipulate investment and development. I feel that someone who wants to lead us should have access to the knowledge and a strategerie ;-) for implementation. I would also like to hear EXACTLY how N. Korea and Iran will be handled beyond "we won't allow them to have nukes". I would like to know what, if anything, will be done to preserve the value of MY savings by protecting the US Dollar.

I realize that a Republican is forced to promote oppression under the guise of social conservatism. This makes being revealing difficult. However, I want some reassurance that gays won't be sent back to the closet as our last class of legal discrimination. What, if anything, is his vision for this horrible "drug war" that makes Mexican gangsters and prison owners rich while it destroys the lives of so many Americans?

As it stands now, if Romney is the candidate I won't vote against him but if he wants me to vote for him, he needs to show me why he's any different than Obusha and in what way he would be better than the last 2 Presidents.

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NAKED N00B said:

Read the whole thing

An amusing and accurate depiction of the challenges Mitt Romney faces as the most likely nominee for the GOP.

Click to expand...

IndepCentristMA said:

I'm a heavy Romney supporter, and saw this article the other day... I thought it was hilarious... and in no way threatening his chances in the general election... for 2 main reasons;

1) political humor such as this can be used to gain popular culture status... achieving popular culture status grants acceptance to well known flaws... take for instance, Bushisms... Slick Willy... etc.. Mitt Romney is known for being able to articulate a point on both sides of an issue... yet, most people still respect him for being Obama's greatest threat to a second term... go figure there, right? Wrong...

Obama will be seen as bad on the economy, and a going back on his position as a moderate, by ruling as a socialist bent on wealth distribution forcing a divided partisan response from congress which threatens progress...

Romney will be seen as a guy who is maleable... and who has a record of achievement, though even the things you despise in him, you don't feel he is firmly behind... You can' tell if he is a conservative, moderate, centrist, independent... but there are things to each of those aspects that you like an him and can find affinity in...

When you go to vote, which of those players seems best to get the vote... the 1 you know lied and hasnt been what he represented himself as, and hasnt turned around the economy... vs the one who is good with handling economic issues, and really isn't convicted in forcing you to do anything you dont want...

Most people vote their wallet, and Romney being good on the economy will pull its weight on voting day

2) This is all that appears on Romney... of the mountain of dirt that gets dragged up against Presidential candidates... after the whole campaign against the Republican opponents, that have been fighting dirty.... all you can dig up on Mitt is that he has some ambivalent responses to questions? Or he's rich, and would be the wealthiest president ever (OH NO!)... Or he is a little bland...

These aren't the kinds of negatives most candidates typically have... because in some cases they're not negatives, and the other ones aren't that negative either... OOO noo... Romney makes ambivalent responses... the other guy meets with terrorists, has a completely biggoted racist priest that hates america... has a wife that hates america... has radical ties to professors who espouse violent methods of creating racial supremacy... has been doing nothing buy playing golf, pick-up basketball, going on vacation on your tax dollars while you the average american is struggling to get by and pay those taxes... Obama has far more negatives if that's how you view people...

Romney's biggest disadvantage going into the general election would be the comments of Rush Limbaugh and Rick Santorum to promote some social christian faith based war on the infidels in this country... By illustrating how Romney doesn't have those convictions, you mitigate one of his potential liabilities..

Romney is not the kind of moronic christian social crusader that the other Republicans are... thus, by supporting Romney, you're free of the dead weight of the backward ideologies...

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