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Donald Trump needs to say this opening up tonights debate:
Tonight I stand before you a man ashamed of himself, ashamed of his history, and ashamed of what I have brought before the American people. My remarks as heard on the Friday tape are inexcusable and should be roundly condemned. And I do not blame anyone for not wanting to support me for them. I am guilty of rude and crude and lewd behavior and I will atone for that.
Many have speculated that tonight I will attack Bill and Hillary Clinton about their marriage and other family issues. I will not do so. And I pledge to not do so at any point in the next four weeks.
I ask the American people to consider that I am a changed man from the boorish lout you saw and heard on that tape. I have traveled this great nation and met hundreds of thousands of Americans who have great love for this nation and who are greatly concerned about this nations problems. We need somebody who can bring change and I believe I am that person.
Lets discuss the issues before this nation. Lets discuss the issues that impact the lives of the American people in their daily struggle to make ends meet and plan a future for their children.
I am sorry for my words... for my behavior and for my offending the American people and particularly women. And I hope you can allow me to move on and help our nation move forward.
This needs to be the equal of the Richard Nixon Checkers speech. It saved Nixon and while this is far far worse, it might give Trump at least a fighting chance to regain something of his tarnished reputation and his campaign.
So basically, what Trump needs to do in order to save his campaign is to go out to the middle of the desert and do four hundred hits of LSD, thereby permanently changing the physical structure of his brain into that of a completely different human being.
It's not impossible. But I don't consider it very likely.