Sex and marriage - Page 2

1069 · 01-29-08, 08:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by americanwoman

Why do people always talk about how when you get married there isn't going to be anymore sex? Why do people (mostly men) create these rumors? Is it because they don't get any sex or because they feel trapped and don't want their buddy to get married? I can say since I've been married the sex has been as good as ever and even more frequent. And it's not just sex that's supposed to end, it's blow jobs and freaky deaky stuff and I don't know why actually getting married would stop those things. Urban legend or not? Thoughts...

No, it's true. But it takes a long time. Ten years? more.
It just stops being interesting- or maybe that's not marriage, maybe that's just getting old.

independent_thinker2002 · 01-29-08, 08:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1069

No, it's true. But it takes a long time. Ten years? more.
It just stops being interesting- or maybe that's not marriage, maybe that's just getting old.

You should be approaching your sexual peak. Get your cougar on, girl!

1069 · 01-29-08, 08:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by independent_thinker2002

You should be approaching your sexual peak. Get your cougar on, girl!

That's a myth.

independent_thinker2002 · 01-29-08, 08:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1069

That's a myth.

No, it's not.

1069 · 01-29-08, 08:42 PM

My sexual peak was like fifteen or twenty years ago.
It's a myth; it doesn't even make any sense from a physiological perspective. Women in their 30s aren't very fertile, and aren't nearly as likely to have healthy offspring if they do manage to get pregnant.
In light of all this, it makes sense from a physiological perspective that womens' sex drive decrease in their 30s. From their mid-30s on, most women are in perimenopause.
To be perfectly honest, most of my same-age contemporaries seem to view sex as nothing more than a chore, at best.
The exceptions are a couple of recent divorcees that I know; but I think they're more like just afraid of being single and broke, and therefore willing to pretend to like fucking in hopes that somebody will marry them.

mikhail · 01-29-08, 09:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1069

My sexual peak was like fifteen or twenty years ago.
It's a myth; it doesn't even make any sense from a physiological perspective. Women in their 30s aren't very fertile, and aren't nearly as likely to have healthy offspring if they do manage to get pregnant.
In light of all this, it makes sense from a physiological perspective that womens' sex drive decrease in their 30s. From their mid-30s on, most women are in perimenopause.
To be perfectly honest, most of my same-age contemporaries seem to view sex as nothing more than a chore, at best.
The exceptions are a couple of recent divorcees that I know; but I think they're more like just afraid of being single and broke, and therefore willing to pretend to like fucking in hopes that somebody will marry them.

So your saying dump any women who gets too old?

independent_thinker2002 · 01-29-08, 10:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1069

My sexual peak was like fifteen or twenty years ago.
It's a myth; it doesn't even make any sense from a physiological perspective. Women in their 30s aren't very fertile, and aren't nearly as likely to have healthy offspring if they do manage to get pregnant.
In light of all this, it makes sense from a physiological perspective that womens' sex drive decrease in their 30s. From their mid-30s on, most women are in perimenopause.
To be perfectly honest, most of my same-age contemporaries seem to view sex as nothing more than a chore, at best.
The exceptions are a couple of recent divorcees that I know; but I think they're more like just afraid of being single and broke, and therefore willing to pretend to like fucking in hopes that somebody will marry them.

As it usually is with women, it's emotional. Women hear the biological clock and start a "midlife crisis".

If sex is a chore, how bad is the sex? Most of the cougers I had were just in need of being sexed properly.

1069 · 01-29-08, 10:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by independent_thinker2002

As it usually is with women, it's emotional. Women hear the biological clock and start a "midlife crisis".

Maybe that's women who want more kids. I'm looking at more than likely being a grandma in the next couple of years. I think I'm in a different mindset altogether on this "biological clock" thing.

Quote:

If sex is a chore, how bad is the sex?

The problem is that guys, as they get older, it takes them longer to get off. Even if the sex is awesome, it starts to become something one dreads if one anticipates it's likely to last for an hour or more.
And this gets to be a vicious circle type of thing, each partner's issues exacerbating the other's.

But anyway, no, I know what you're saying. I know some women who have gone through fertility treatments in their mid to late forties because they suddenly wanted to have a kid, or wanted another kid, after their first batch was grown and gone.
But I'm in a totally different place in my life.
The things I'm looking forward to in the future have to do with being selfish and taking risks. They don't have to do with taking care of other people anymore, and certainly not with making new people to have to take care of.

FallingPianos · 01-29-08, 10:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1069

My sexual peak was like fifteen or twenty years ago.
It's a myth; it doesn't even make any sense from a physiological perspective. Women in their 30s aren't very fertile, and aren't nearly as likely to have healthy offspring if they do manage to get pregnant.
In light of all this, it makes sense from a physiological perspective that womens' sex drive decrease in their 30s. From their mid-30s on, most women are in perimenopause.
To be perfectly honest, most of my same-age contemporaries seem to view sex as nothing more than a chore, at best.
The exceptions are a couple of recent divorcees that I know; but I think they're more like just afraid of being single and broke, and therefore willing to pretend to like fucking in hopes that somebody will marry them.

maybe older woman are more comfortable with their bodies and sexuality, making them better sex partners, even if they don't have as much sex drive?

1069 · 01-29-08, 11:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FallingPianos

maybe older woman are more comfortable with their bodies and sexuality, making them better sex partners, even if they don't have as much sex drive?

That's not been my experience.
Although it sounds nice, and I assumed it would be so, when I was your age.
Then I got older and found out that most older women are just as f'ed up, insecure, and immature as young women are; maybe more so.
I think in a way older women are more resigned to their bodies. They're used to them, and beyond the hope that they might still change for the better (a hope that many in their late teens and early 20s can still reasonably entertain).
Once one is beyond thirty, every year brings new assaults on one's vanity. In fact most cosmetic surgery is performed on women in their 40s and beyond... although perhaps only because younger women often don't have the money for it.
One can get "comfortable" with one's body, that's all fine and well, but then it changes again. One has to keep lowering the bar.
"Looking good" becomes qualified: "looking good for one's age."
It's discouraging, if one actually cares about such things as appearances, which I don't much, anymore. There are other things I care more about at this point.
In a way, I'm still young, but I think my mindset around this issue is more like that of someone in their 40s or 50s. I'm giving up early. I've come to see much of what women (and a lot of men, too) do in an effort to keep up appearances as frivolous, time-consuming, and largely futile.