View Poll Results: Can a man and a woman be JUST friends?

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Thread: Can a man and a woman be JUST friends?

  1. #1
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    Can a man and a woman be JUST friends?

    My opinion is probably not.

    I believe straight men and women can work alongside one another, socialize in groups together, and be acquaintances, without there being any sexual tension or interest by one or both of the parties in the other. However, I believe it is highly unlikely, if not near impossible, for them to be JUST friends one on one. I believe, in male/female relationships with straight people, there is almost always sexual tension and interest by one or both of the parties in the other.

    Some additional questions:

    - If your boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife had a best friend who was a member of the opposite sex, would that be problematic for you?

    - If your boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife had an an ex who was a close friend, or even their best friend, would that be problematic for you?

    - And finally, my own situation... if you were dating someone who had a RECENT ex, who was their best friend, who lived down the street from them, and had daily, in-person contact, who called and visited at all hours of the night, bought them gifts, and was admittedly doing their best to try to win back the person you were dating, would that be problematic for you? What if the person you were dating did little or nothing to discourage their ex's behavior?
    Last edited by Curious George; 02-19-11 at 03:54 AM. Reason: Edited for formatting.

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    Re: Can a man and a woman be JUST friends?

    Yes, a man and woman can "just be friends". Paranoia is not an attractive trait, just so you know.

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    Re: Can a man and a woman be JUST friends?

    I have few female friends that I have no interest in wanting to have sex with, If I were dating I would have no problem with my GF having an opposite sex friend.

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    Re: Can a man and a woman be JUST friends?

    I would say yes, I'm just friends with other lesbians, and I don't think that is any different.
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    Re: Can a man and a woman be JUST friends?

    Quote Originally Posted by cpgrad08 View Post
    I have few female friends that I have no interest in wanting to have sex with, If I were dating I would have no problem with my GF having an opposite sex friend.
    "Sex friend" is a good term for friends with benefits.


    I do know that's not what you mean, but just saying.
    Quote Originally Posted by Free_Radical View Post

    And I wasn't making an appeal to authority, I was making an appeal to the philosophical body of work of the founders, the worth and content of which should be well-known to anyone with a cursory understanding of basic history and philosophy.

    Brian

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    Re: Can a man and a woman be JUST friends?

    Quote Originally Posted by Curious George View Post
    My opinion is probably not.

    I believe straight men and women can work alongside one another, socialize in groups together, and be acquaintances, without there being any sexual tension or interest by one or both of the parties in the other. However, I believe it is highly unlikely, if not near impossible, for them to be JUST friends one on one. I believe, in male/female relationships with straight people, there is almost always sexual tension and interest by one or both of the parties in the other.

    Some additional questions:

    - If your boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife had a best friend who was a member of the opposite sex, would that be problematic for you?

    - If your boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife had an an ex who was a close friend, or even their best friend, would that be problematic for you?

    - And finally, my own situation... if you were dating someone who had a RECENT ex, who was their best friend, who lived down the street from them, and had daily, in-person contact, who called and visited at all hours of the night, bought them gifts, and was admittedly doing their best to try to win back the person you were dating, would that be problematic for you? What if the person you were dating did little or nothing to discourage their ex's behavior?
    If you can't trust her to not cheat on you, and you're looking for something serious, leave the relationship and look for someone else you feel you can trust. If you can't find someone you can trust you need to work on yourself. If you are just fooling around, make sure you wear a condom and you're set.
    Quote Originally Posted by Free_Radical View Post

    And I wasn't making an appeal to authority, I was making an appeal to the philosophical body of work of the founders, the worth and content of which should be well-known to anyone with a cursory understanding of basic history and philosophy.

    Brian

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    Re: Can a man and a woman be JUST friends?

    The poll doesn't have an, "only if they're unattractive" option.

    Quote Originally Posted by Your Star View Post
    I would say yes, I'm just friends with other lesbians, and I don't think that is any different.
    I think I'm just going to like everything pertaining to Lesbians.
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    Re: Can a man and a woman be JUST friends?

    Quote Originally Posted by Curious George View Post
    My opinion is probably not.
    Of course a man and a woman can be JUST friends.

    Men and women don't hop into bed with every woman and man they socialize with. That's just silly and narrow-minded. And just because a man and a woman shows affection for someone of the other sex doesn't mean that there's passion behind it.

    I'm friendly with a few girlfriends of my male buddies, but that doesn't mean I want to get in their pants. But I also have a very low tolerance for dealing with stupid ****, which is probably why I don't have currently have a girlfriend of my own. So if I don't want to deal with all the crap of having my own girlfriend, what makes you think I want to deal with all the crap of trying to hook up with some other guy's girlfriend?

    Quote Originally Posted by Curious George View Post
    I believe straight men and women can work alongside one another, socialize in groups together, and be acquaintances, without there being any sexual tension or interest by one or both of the parties in the other. However, I believe it is highly unlikely, if not near impossible, for them to be JUST friends one on one. I believe, in male/female relationships with straight people, there is almost always sexual tension and interest by one or both of the parties in the other.
    Well, of course there's going to be sexual tension or interest. People are on a visceral level just animals, and that combined with our id give us an innate desire to sex up others.

    But just because there's sexual tension or interest between two people doesn't mean they can't be friendly with each other. At least as long as at least one of them acknowledges the tension or interest is there and handles it in a mature manner.

    Because what you're forgetting is that just because there's sexual tension or interest doesn't mean it's a good idea to act on it. In many cases it's a bad idea, for whatever reason.

    So sexual tension is completely independent of friendship.

    Especially when you factor in the sexual tension that occurs between two people who absolutely hate each other. With a passion...

    Quote Originally Posted by Curious George View Post
    Some additional questions:
    Okay.

    Quote Originally Posted by Curious George View Post
    - If your boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife had a best friend who was a member of the opposite sex, would that be problematic for you?
    Not at all. People need other people to watch out for them. And the more other people try to look out for another individual, the better off that individual will be.

    So we need people to look out for us.

    Also, I know that I wouldn't be able to fulfill all the needs of my girlfriend. I may be able to fill her needs for sex, for intimacy, and for passion. However, we are still two individuals, and while we may have commonalities we will also have our differences.

    For when we have different things, I want her to have someone to enjoy those things with. I also want to be able to enjoy my different interests with other people.

    For example, I'm in playing Magic: The Gathering, a collectible card game, which most women aren't. Most women are into fashion, which I absolutely am not. While I love my girlfriend, I'm not going to give up playing Magic, and neither do I expect her to give up fashion.

    So if she finds someone who enjoys fashion and is a man, I'm fine with that, because that means she has someone to enjoy that hobby with. And when she's off doing that, I'll be playing Magic. And if I do so with a woman, that's fine. Because I already have someone who fills all my other needs.

    Quote Originally Posted by Curious George View Post
    - If your boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife had an an ex who was a close friend, or even their best friend, would that be problematic for you?
    It would be when I was younger. Nowadays, I just don't give a damn. Life's too short to be worried about every little thing. I'm too busy throughout the day to keep track of what my girlfriend does and who she does it with. I gotta have some level of trust in a relationship. If I don't have that trust, then what's the ****ing point of being in a relationship? Better to just be alone and not deal with all that anxiety.

    Also, if she's friends with an ex, that's fine with me. At least he's not a violent stalker who's out to come after us in a murderous rage because he refuses to believe that they're broken up. Count your blessings.

    Quote Originally Posted by Curious George View Post
    - And finally, my own situation... if you were dating someone who had a RECENT ex, who was their best friend, who lived down the street from them, and had daily, in-person contact, who called and visited at all hours of the night, bought them gifts, and was admittedly doing their best to try to win back the person you were dating, would that be problematic for you? What if the person you were dating did little or nothing to discourage their ex's behavior?
    Well, I don't think that an ex who talks all the time with my girlfriend, meets my girlfriend, and then brings my girlfriend gifts is necessarily trying to win my girlfriend back.

    Yes, an ex-bf may do that to try to win back my gf. But I'm saying that just because he does those things doesn't mean he's necessarily trying to win her back. Sometimes it's just nice to be nice with other people.

    And let's say it worked. Okay then. They want to get back together. Fine. Then I'll just break up with her and wish the two of them the best and then go back and look for someone to date elsewhere.

    Life's too short to get worked up over bull**** like that.
    Also, we need to legalize recreational drugs and prostitution.

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    Re: Can a man and a woman be JUST friends?

    People can be just friends even when there is sexual tension between them.
    "The darkest places in hell are reserved for those who maintain their neutrality in times of moral crisis."

    Dante Alighieri

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    Re: Can a man and a woman be JUST friends?

    Quote Originally Posted by Curious George View Post
    My opinion is probably not.

    I believe straight men and women can work alongside one another, socialize in groups together, and be acquaintances, without there being any sexual tension or interest by one or both of the parties in the other. However, I believe it is highly unlikely, if not near impossible, for them to be JUST friends one on one. I believe, in male/female relationships with straight people, there is almost always sexual tension and interest by one or both of the parties in the other.

    Some additional questions:

    - If your boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife had a best friend who was a member of the opposite sex, would that be problematic for you?

    - If your boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife had an an ex who was a close friend, or even their best friend, would that be problematic for you?

    - And finally, my own situation... if you were dating someone who had a RECENT ex, who was their best friend, who lived down the street from them, and had daily, in-person contact, who called and visited at all hours of the night, bought them gifts, and was admittedly doing their best to try to win back the person you were dating, would that be problematic for you? What if the person you were dating did little or nothing to discourage their ex's behavior?
    Only if he's gay.

    If she's gay then he's in the friendship to see some hot lesbo action, of course if they're both straight then we know what the dynamic is.

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