View Poll Results: how are family values today compared to yesterday?

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  • values are higher than before

    2 7.41%
  • values are the same

    9 33.33%
  • values are lower than before

    16 59.26%
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Thread: Family Values

  1. #91
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    Re: Family Values

    Quote Originally Posted by FallingPianos View Post
    it has to be up to the couple to maintain that commitment.

    government interference in the form of making divorce unnecessarily difficult won't make people love each other more, nor will it make them more committed to each other.
    But it will make them think twice about getting into a marriage not so easily tossed away.

    Quote Originally Posted by FallingPianos View Post
    people get married for money, and they stay together in unhappy relationships for money. this is hardly new. is this supposed to be an example of family values?
    No. But it is a really good example of how stupid people can really be.

    Quote Originally Posted by FallingPianos View Post
    my argument is that making divorce more difficult does not solve the root problem, and makes the consequences of it more severe.
    It does solve the root problem as I see it. People should not be getting married at the drop of a hat. People with 10+ divorces under the belt should raise an alarm bell to others. 5 marriages is becoming way to common.
    Last edited by Black Dog; 03-03-09 at 12:08 AM.


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  2. #92
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    Re: Family Values

    Quote Originally Posted by Blackdog View Post
    But it will make them think twice about getting into a marriage not so easily tossed away.
    I doubt it. people are very idealistic about marriage. they don't tend to get married if they don't think it will work. even discussing the possibility of making a prenuptial agreement can make people angry, because they don't want to acknowledge the fact that the marriage might not work.

    for a variety of reasons, the age people enter their first marriage has been going up, not down.

  3. #93
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    Re: Family Values

    Quote Originally Posted by Bodhisattva View Post
    My point has nothing to do with keeping an existing bad relationship together or to casting blame. I hope that you understand that.

    I was not indicating that the why is important for justification/judgement reasons, but rather as a means to understanding how and why the relationship failed, so that those within it can learn and apply new methods towards getting along so that all within the unit, whether it be divorced with new partners or not, are happier and better adjusted so that all prosper, especially any children.

    For that reason, and for others as well, I would argue that the why is relevant to everybody, including you.
    Purely for the sake of personal growth, I don't disagree.



    Quote Originally Posted by Blackdog View Post
    But it will make them think twice about getting into a marriage not so easily tossed away.
    You won't see any argument for me for reasons people should get married. (I can't think of a reason to get married)

    So yeah, like I said previously in another thread... make it incredibly difficult to get divorced and make adultery a crime and marriage will be all but obliterated and I'm perfectly okay with that since the government shouldn't be involved in the first place.

    Absolutely, agree 100%.

    It does solve the root problem as I see it. People should not be getting married at the drop of a hat. People with 10+ divorces under the belt should raise an alarm bell to others. 5 marriages is becoming way to common.
    I agree because the root of the problem is that people are getting married to begin with. Or even more simply, that the government is involved at all. I very much agree that making it both difficult to get married, incredibly difficult to get divorced, and quite simply more advantageous not to bother signing some silly government license at all will absolutely get to the root of the problem and eventually get the government out of marriage altogether. One can only hope, anyway.

  4. #94
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    Re: Family Values

    Quote Originally Posted by FallingPianos View Post
    I doubt it. people are very idealistic about marriage. they don't tend to get married if they don't think it will work. even discussing the possibility of making a prenuptial agreement can make people angry, because they don't want to acknowledge the fact that the marriage might not work.
    Well I can agree to disagree here. I don't think any hard data exists to really back either of our positions.

    Quote Originally Posted by FallingPianos View Post
    for a variety of reasons, the age people enter their first marriage has been going up, not down.
    I don't think that is a bad thing at all.


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  5. #95
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    Re: Family Values

    Quote Originally Posted by rivrrat View Post
    So yeah, like I said previously in another thread... make it incredibly difficult to get divorced and make adultery a crime and marriage will be all but obliterated and I'm perfectly okay with that since the government shouldn't be involved in the first place.

    Absolutely, agree 100%.
    I don't think adultery should be a crime. I do think government needs to get out of marriage though.

    So I agree with you to about 65%

    Quote Originally Posted by rivrrat View Post
    I agree because the root of the problem is that people are getting married to begin with. Or even more simply, that the government is involved at all. I very much agree that making it both difficult to get married, incredibly difficult to get divorced, and quite simply more advantageous not to bother signing some silly government license at all will absolutely get to the root of the problem and eventually get the government out of marriage altogether. One can only hope, anyway.
    Now that I can agree with 100%


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  6. #96
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    Re: Family Values

    Quote Originally Posted by Blackdog View Post
    I don't think that is a bad thing at all.
    neither do I. I'm just pointing out that if no-fault divorce made people more eager to enter into marriage prematurely, we would be seeing the opposite trend.

    but there are so many variables that its hard to make generalizations anyway. (more schooling, increased cost of living, etc)

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