View Poll Results: Should birth records be open to adopted children

Voters
21. You may not vote on this poll
  • Yes

    9 42.86%
  • No

    2 9.52%
  • Depends on the circumstances

    9 42.86%
  • Undecided

    1 4.76%
Page 6 of 6 FirstFirst ... 456
Results 51 to 56 of 56

Thread: Should birth records be available to adopted children?

  1. #51
    Sage
    Infinite Chaos's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Last Seen
    Today @ 01:08 AM
    Lean
    Undisclosed
    Posts
    13,370

    Re: Should birth records be available to adopted children?

    Hello independent_thinker2002, I'm curious why you would think that? I agree that children of adoption have a right to find out about their past but why would you have a right to contact if the other party doesn't wish it?

    It's not a right available to any other citizen that I'm aware of - if a non adoption child and parent become estranged and the child (whether adult or not by now) wishes contact then that cannot be enforced - so why in the case of an adoption child?

    By "contact" - I mean something beyond the first letter or phonecall saying "hello, I exist and have found you - would you like to talk?." That's as far as it goes in my book. I'm actually in a situation like this where one of my students tracked her estranged father down from his facebook profile. He wants the contact (which is why he created the facebook account) and she's hunted him for 3 years and is contemplating her first letter. When she told me of her anger he hadn't come for her I explained he had no rights and she is now having a rethink of all the pent up anger she's had.

    Both people have a right to privacy if the first meeting does not go well I'm afraid and that's what I've told her.

  2. #52
    Bus Driver to Hell
    Thorgasm's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Last Seen
    Yesterday @ 04:36 PM
    Lean
    Liberal
    Posts
    66,689

    Re: Should birth records be available to adopted children?

    Quote Originally Posted by Infinite Chaos View Post
    Hello independent_thinker2002, I'm curious why you would think that? I agree that children of adoption have a right to find out about their past but why would you have a right to contact if the other party doesn't wish it?

    It's not a right available to any other citizen that I'm aware of - if a non adoption child and parent become estranged and the child (whether adult or not by now) wishes contact then that cannot be enforced - so why in the case of an adoption child?

    By "contact" - I mean something beyond the first letter or phonecall saying "hello, I exist and have found you - would you like to talk?." That's as far as it goes in my book. I'm actually in a situation like this where one of my students tracked her estranged father down from his facebook profile. He wants the contact (which is why he created the facebook account) and she's hunted him for 3 years and is contemplating her first letter. When she told me of her anger he hadn't come for her I explained he had no rights and she is now having a rethink of all the pent up anger she's had.

    Both people have a right to privacy if the first meeting does not go well I'm afraid and that's what I've told her.
    One meeting is fine. I thought I was clear about that. If they want to say they don't want contact, that is fine. At least they should say that.
    Quote Originally Posted by Jerry
    The Amish are light-years ahead of the rest of the human race.



  3. #53
    Sage
    Infinite Chaos's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Last Seen
    Today @ 01:08 AM
    Lean
    Undisclosed
    Posts
    13,370

    Re: Should birth records be available to adopted children?

    Thank you for the clarification. Seems you, Cephus and I are in agreement although there may have been and are still some differences.

    My elder brother is one of those "fathers" who has a facebook page - he and his girlfriend split pre 1992 and she unilaterally gave up the newborn for adoption despite his and my now deceased mother being prepared to take the child on and raise her. He has no right to go tracing his lost daughter but has to sit waiting for that email / phonecall which may never come.

  4. #54
    Bus Driver to Hell
    Thorgasm's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Last Seen
    Yesterday @ 04:36 PM
    Lean
    Liberal
    Posts
    66,689

    Re: Should birth records be available to adopted children?

    Quote Originally Posted by Infinite Chaos View Post
    Thank you for the clarification. Seems you, Cephus and I are in agreement although there may have been and are still some differences.

    My elder brother is one of those "fathers" who has a facebook page - he and his girlfriend split pre 1992 and she unilaterally gave up the newborn for adoption despite his and my now deceased mother being prepared to take the child on and raise her. He has no right to go tracing his lost daughter but has to sit waiting for that email / phonecall which may never come.
    Yeah, that's one of the consequences of sex. Condoms don't feel good. I bet that feels even worse.
    Quote Originally Posted by Jerry
    The Amish are light-years ahead of the rest of the human race.



  5. #55
    Sage
    Infinite Chaos's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Last Seen
    Today @ 01:08 AM
    Lean
    Undisclosed
    Posts
    13,370

    Re: Should birth records be available to adopted children?

    It was a while ago but I remember they were planning to get married when things went wrong for them - it wasn't just sex on their part. Anyhow - he's not had a relationship that lasted more than 6 months since, he just doesn't trust women anymore. Which is sad as his daughter is one.

  6. #56
    Bus Driver to Hell
    Thorgasm's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Last Seen
    Yesterday @ 04:36 PM
    Lean
    Liberal
    Posts
    66,689

    Re: Should birth records be available to adopted children?

    Quote Originally Posted by Infinite Chaos View Post
    It was a while ago but I remember they were planning to get married when things went wrong for them - it wasn't just sex on their part. Anyhow - he's not had a relationship that lasted more than 6 months since, he just doesn't trust women anymore. Which is sad as his daughter is one.
    I don't mean that it's cheap or meaningless sex. It's a byproduct of any type of sex. Intentions don't change the consequences.
    Quote Originally Posted by Jerry
    The Amish are light-years ahead of the rest of the human race.



Page 6 of 6 FirstFirst ... 456

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •