Have any of you read Lolita? You should - Humbert is a fictional character but Nabokov, through Humbert, explains EXACTLY what pedophilia is and shows EXACTLY what pedophilia isn't. I read Lolita in an effort to understand more of WHY I was a victim when I was a child -
why do grown adults even find kids a turn on? (And by KIDS I mean KIDS . . . I am not talking about teenagers in some state of adolescent change on their way to adulthood - but pre-pubescent KIDS. Seeing as how such events shaped my entire life I was always beyond troubled by the WHY).
Adults and attraction is like this: MATURE and CHILDBEARING or STRENGTH features are the appeal: shapely hips, defined curves, full lips, defined muscles, body hair in certain ways - etc. These are 'grown up' things. If you're attracted to teen girls that are busty, have hips and are on their way to becoming women it is these 'adult' features you're drawn to. You are not drawn to the fact that they're 'underaged'.
That stands in direct opposition to what pedophiles LIKE.
In the mind of a pedophile it goes like this:
Pre-puberty children have certain physical and psychological characteristics (a LACK of breasts, a LACK of body fat in certain places, a lack of wide hips, they're naive, immature (easy to mold into a willing sex partner). It's the PRESENCE of certain juvenile characteristics (usually more than one) and the ABSENCE of certain adult characteristics that make them appealing.
Pedophilia is a PRIMARY (main) attraction toward kids. They'll respond to children in the SAME WAY a grown adult will respond to a grown or
mostly developed adult and some will NEVER be attracted to an adult - only kids.
SOME aggressors, however, aren't 'pedophiles' simply put but just monstrous predators that feed on AVAILABLE victims - age and gender usually doesn't matter to a molester or a rapist. It's
victim-ability: access, the ability to manipulate and control, vindictive behaviors like this that drive the sexual acts - nothing else. Not appearance. Not boobs VS no boobs - etc. It's the ability to sexually control or govern someone - ANYONE - that drives the predator.
Therefor: Predators are perfectly capable of loving an ADULT and finding adults to be intensely attractive, visually speaking. Pedophiles are attracted to UNDERAGED features and mentalities . . . and predators are attracted to the idea of being able to dominate, humiliate, govern, control.
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MOST men who like 'young looking women' just like tits and ass - they just favor smoother skin and sweeter smiles . . . hardly worth getting upset over.
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On top of that differntia is the heaped on AGE and LEGALLY DEFINED limit that society declares right or not-right. In some countries a 16 year old girl is seen as a woman who is perfectly capable of consenting to sex with a man of any age. Likewise: in the US age of consent and statutory rape age limits shift state to state. What's okay in some states isn't okay in others so even with US there's a pool of differences (age is one factor, but age-gap between partners is another and whether or not the older individual possible KNEW the younger individual WAS underaged in yet another factor).
The Age of Consent |
