• This is a political forum that is non-biased/non-partisan and treats every person's position on topics equally. This debate forum is not aligned to any political party. In today's politics, many ideas are split between and even within all the political parties. Often we find ourselves agreeing on one platform but some topics break our mold. We are here to discuss them in a civil political debate. If this is your first visit to our political forums, be sure to check out the RULES. Registering for debate politics is necessary before posting. Register today to participate - it's free!

Was I wrong?

Was I wrong to ask her to stop?

  • Yes

    Votes: 2 4.4%
  • No

    Votes: 43 95.6%

  • Total voters
    45
Im mostly asking because its on my mind trying to determine how the city is going to view this. her pulling kid off my team is silly to me, but wouldn't bother me. The city having me come in tonight, has to be tonight, and they are working late to have this meeting makes me feel like they think i did.

Face it, you're screwed. What you did is on a par with refusing to bake her a cake. If she was offended it IS your fault and you WILL pay the price. The good news is that after you're fired you'll have lots of free time to attend sensitivity training.
 
If it happened just as you described why do you think you need to ask if you were right or wrong?

If it happenned just as you described I don't think any rational person could possibly say you were in the wrong. Which makes me wonder why you have to ask...

Maybe because he's not dealing with rational people. The gay mafia is very, very real and they WILL crush you just because they feel like it.
 
This is a PC issue so there is no "right" way to handle it. Basically, the only course of action that might prevent you from getting fired and probably thrown in jail is to extoll the virtues of homosexuality in a 3000 word essay in the local paper and propose erecting a monument to lesbians in center field.

Nah, a monument is too phallic, best to just dig a memorial hole. :mrgreen:
 
Who knows...they may play it safe but I find it hard she can prove that you told her to "hide her sexuality" because the words never left your mouth. Something like that is virtually impossible to prove unless she lies and then if she lies it's he said vs she said which isn't exactly going to fly.

At the end of the day, she was obnoxious and other parents seem like they would back you up on that. I'm don't think there's any legal right to barrage everyone as soon as you meet them like you're reading them their Miranda rights.

Who says it has to be proved? This kind of crap takes it's toll based on mere accusations. If the city thinks they may have a nickel to lose on this he screwed. They all know damned well that the feminazi will be in the papers with the story, there will be a public demand for an investigation and consequences. The only way the city can nip all that in the bud is to can him immediately and ban him from any city activities involving children.
 
Last edited:
Face it, you're screwed. What you did is on a par with refusing to bake her a cake. If she was offended it IS your fault and you WILL pay the price. The good news is that after you're fired you'll have lots of free time to attend sensitivity training.

Lol.

Exactly. He's being led by the nose like a lamb to slaughter with all this, "you got nothing to worry about" stuff. :mrgreen:
 
So you think I shouldn't have said anything? I am thinking now if i just let her finish to the whole group, get it off her chest it may have ended right then and there and she may not have brought it back up and no problems.

It wouldn't have ended there. If you didn't stop her she'd have been at every practice and every game proselytizing because you allowed it the first time. Face it, she put you in a no win situation. It's not your fault but you WILL pay the price.
 
I coach for the city here where i live. Varying sports for ages 4-13 depending on where they need help coaching. For baseball this year one of my teams is a 4-5 year old t ball team. We had our first practice last night and two women came with a little girl. I introduced myself and said hi and they immediately went on a little speech about how they are together, they are lesbians, they are raising this girl together, nothing wrong with that. Then go into whats going to happen if I discriminate against their daughter because of their sexuality, threatening lawsuits and explaining that there are laws ect. I told them I was there to teach their daughter softball, and their sexual orientation was not a factor at all and moved along. As I am meeting other parents a few of them commented that this lady had approached them and gave them a similar speech out of nowhere. After all the kids were there I gathered the kids together and started off having the kids introduce themselves to their teammates. No additional information really, just kid would say my name is Earl. And everyone would say Hi Earl to start to learn teammates names. When the little girl told everyone her name, again the lady popped into action giving her speech to everyone out there. I stopped her after about a minute and spoke to her privately, or as privately as I could on a baseball field, and let her know that it is not appropriate to interrupt a team activity like that, and again told her noone is going to be discriminating against her daughter. So today I get a call from the city letting me know she filed a complaint and is taking her child off of my team because I told her she had to hide her sexuality at our practices so it wouldn't bother other parents. I dont recall my exact wording but it was not mean, the word hiding or even sexuality didnt come out of my mouth. I only asked her not to interrupt our practices and tried to assure he that I don't care what her sexual preference is, I am there to teach baseball and the other parents are only there to watch.

Was I wrong to ask her to stop what she was doing?

WHile i have trouble believing your story ill answer anyway . . .

if this went down the way you claim you were 100% in the right and as a coach myself it is inappropriate to interrupt a team activity . . .I applaud you on your effort and conduct. As for the lady if she did all that and then reported you she is loon, crazier than a **** house rat looking for attention or some type of pay day etc.
 
I coach for the city here where i live. Varying sports for ages 4-13 depending on where they need help coaching. For baseball this year one of my teams is a 4-5 year old t ball team. We had our first practice last night and two women came with a little girl. I introduced myself and said hi and they immediately went on a little speech about how they are together, they are lesbians, they are raising this girl together, nothing wrong with that. Then go into whats going to happen if I discriminate against their daughter because of their sexuality, threatening lawsuits and explaining that there are laws ect. I told them I was there to teach their daughter softball, and their sexual orientation was not a factor at all and moved along. As I am meeting other parents a few of them commented that this lady had approached them and gave them a similar speech out of nowhere. After all the kids were there I gathered the kids together and started off having the kids introduce themselves to their teammates. No additional information really, just kid would say my name is Earl. And everyone would say Hi Earl to start to learn teammates names. When the little girl told everyone her name, again the lady popped into action giving her speech to everyone out there. I stopped her after about a minute and spoke to her privately, or as privately as I could on a baseball field, and let her know that it is not appropriate to interrupt a team activity like that, and again told her noone is going to be discriminating against her daughter. So today I get a call from the city letting me know she filed a complaint and is taking her child off of my team because I told her she had to hide her sexuality at our practices so it wouldn't bother other parents. I dont recall my exact wording but it was not mean, the word hiding or even sexuality didnt come out of my mouth. I only asked her not to interrupt our practices and tried to assure he that I don't care what her sexual preference is, I am there to teach baseball and the other parents are only there to watch.

Was I wrong to ask her to stop what she was doing?

No you were not wrong.
The complaint must be investigated, but as you have detailed, they laid their LAW down to kids and parents at the practice.
I feel for the kid though. 2 asses as parents.
 
I dont disagree, but I am worried that this is going to turn into something that gets me pulled from coaching while they look into or whatever they do. Especially since i have to meet with the city's hr rep. Its bothering the **** out of me since i got the call.

Be prepared, notes, names of parents present, put nothing in but facts, no emotion, no conclusions, just facts.
And contact the parent present and ask if they can do the same. provide you with thier written observations. Also inform them to do what I recommended you do. No emotion, no conclusions, just facts.
 
If she is as bad as you described, invite her to a meeting with the city and let her talk. They'll quickly understand the problem.

As for the crybabies in this thread that swear "this is how it is in the U.S. now", please... get a grip, nobody sane considers that acceptable behavior or "PC".
 
I coach for the city here where i live. Varying sports for ages 4-13 depending on where they need help coaching. For baseball this year one of my teams is a 4-5 year old t ball team. We had our first practice last night and two women came with a little girl. I introduced myself and said hi and they immediately went on a little speech about how they are together, they are lesbians, they are raising this girl together, nothing wrong with that. Then go into whats going to happen if I discriminate against their daughter because of their sexuality, threatening lawsuits and explaining that there are laws ect. I told them I was there to teach their daughter softball, and their sexual orientation was not a factor at all and moved along. As I am meeting other parents a few of them commented that this lady had approached them and gave them a similar speech out of nowhere. After all the kids were there I gathered the kids together and started off having the kids introduce themselves to their teammates. No additional information really, just kid would say my name is Earl. And everyone would say Hi Earl to start to learn teammates names. When the little girl told everyone her name, again the lady popped into action giving her speech to everyone out there. I stopped her after about a minute and spoke to her privately, or as privately as I could on a baseball field, and let her know that it is not appropriate to interrupt a team activity like that, and again told her noone is going to be discriminating against her daughter. So today I get a call from the city letting me know she filed a complaint and is taking her child off of my team because I told her she had to hide her sexuality at our practices so it wouldn't bother other parents. I dont recall my exact wording but it was not mean, the word hiding or even sexuality didnt come out of my mouth. I only asked her not to interrupt our practices and tried to assure he that I don't care what her sexual preference is, I am there to teach baseball and the other parents are only there to watch.

Was I wrong to ask her to stop what she was doing?

Damn, tee ball is supposed to be fun. Loved it when my boys played tee ball even though they chased more butterflies than balls in the outfield. As for this chick? She sounds nuts. She sounds defensive. When kids are playing tee ball, their parents' bedroom preferences shouldn't be anymore relevant than the name of the head janitor in the Milan Opera House.
 
Maybe because he's not dealing with rational people. The gay mafia is very, very real and they WILL crush you just because they feel like it.

Can you stop them with tinfoil hats? Seems to work for all the other conspiracies.
 
Be prepared, notes, names of parents present, put nothing in but facts, no emotion, no conclusions, just facts.
And contact the parent present and ask if they can do the same. provide you with thier written observations. Also inform them to do what I recommended you do. No emotion, no conclusions, just facts.

The LAST thing he should do is bring another parent he doesn't know to the meeting. How does he know what they'll say? What if they're intimidated and give the interviewer a negative impression of the incident? If he's going to bring anyone it should be an attorney.
 
Damn, tee ball is supposed to be fun. Loved it when my boys played tee ball even though they chased more butterflies than balls in the outfield. As for this chick? She sounds nuts. She sounds defensive. When kids are playing tee ball, their parents' bedroom preferences shouldn't be anymore relevant than the name of the head janitor in the Milan Opera House.

She isn't nuts. She's a bully with an agenda but the worst part of it is that, for political expedience, she'll be supported by the authorities.
 
Obviously I don't think I was wrong, but I have to go meet with the sports director and someone from their HR to discuss how to handle it in the future. I haven't really spoken to them much about it but, who knows how they may interpret it when we meet.

I think as long as you honestly and completely explain the situation to them, you should be fine. In my experience, HR folks tend to understand that there are crazy people out there and no matter how much you tried to be reasonable with them they still filed a complaint. If what you say about the other parents is true, you can always tell them to try and gather some additional witness testimonies so they know that you weren't being a dick, but rather the parents were.

These kinds of situations are difficult to analyze when you aren't there and there are always two sides, but from the way you've described it, you did nothing wrong, and they sounded like they have a persecution complex. maybe because they live in the springs they feel like everyone is out to get them.
 
My wife said same thing, to ask another parent to come. Most of what was said was probably heard, but i feel wierd asking them to come for something like this, when i just met them last night.

they don't have to come, just tell the HR people to give them a call. they may have already done so by the time you get there and you might not have anything to worry about. like someone else said: damage control.
 
I think as long as you honestly and completely explain the situation to them, you should be fine. In my experience, HR folks tend to understand that there are crazy people out there and no matter how much you tried to be reasonable with them they still filed a complaint. If what you say about the other parents is true, you can always tell them to try and gather some additional witness testimonies so they know that you weren't being a dick, but rather the parents were.

These kinds of situations are difficult to analyze when you aren't there and there are always two sides, but from the way you've described it, you did nothing wrong, and they sounded like they have a persecution complex. maybe because they live in the springs they feel like everyone is out to get them.

I don't know what she said, but yes there are two sides I'm sure. At the very least I know my intent but don't remember what I said exactly.
 
The LAST thing he should do is bring another parent he doesn't know to the meeting. How does he know what they'll say? What if they're intimidated and give the interviewer a negative impression of the incident? If he's going to bring anyone it should be an attorney.

I staed notes, parent to write out the same thing. No suggestions on what to write, just their recollection of events.
 
I don't know what she said, but yes there are two sides I'm sure. At the very least I know my intent but don't remember what I said exactly.

you sound like you care, which means you're probably a great coach, so it would be a shame if this ended badly for you. I am in HR and know how these situations can go down so just make sure to keep your cool, tell the truth, and 99% of the time, reason will prevail. whenever there is a complaint, it's standard practice for HR to investigate but I would be really surprised if they came down on you for this. keep us posted.
 
you sound like you care, which means you're probably a great coach, so it would be a shame if this ended badly for you. I am in HR and know how these situations can go down so just make sure to keep your cool, tell the truth, and 99% of the time, reason will prevail. whenever there is a complaint, it's standard practice for HR to investigate but I would be really surprised if they came down on you for this. keep us posted.

I am about to head on over now. I'll post when I get home.

As a note, I am not calling parents and dragging them into it. I certainly am not calling an attorney. I'll go in, explain, and see what happens. Hr or the director can call who they'd like.
 
I coach for the city here where i live. Varying sports for ages 4-13 depending on where they need help coaching. For baseball this year one of my teams is a 4-5 year old t ball team. We had our first practice last night and two women came with a little girl. I introduced myself and said hi and they immediately went on a little speech about how they are together, they are lesbians, they are raising this girl together, nothing wrong with that. Then go into whats going to happen if I discriminate against their daughter because of their sexuality, threatening lawsuits and explaining that there are laws ect. I told them I was there to teach their daughter softball, and their sexual orientation was not a factor at all and moved along. As I am meeting other parents a few of them commented that this lady had approached them and gave them a similar speech out of nowhere. After all the kids were there I gathered the kids together and started off having the kids introduce themselves to their teammates. No additional information really, just kid would say my name is Earl. And everyone would say Hi Earl to start to learn teammates names. When the little girl told everyone her name, again the lady popped into action giving her speech to everyone out there. I stopped her after about a minute and spoke to her privately, or as privately as I could on a baseball field, and let her know that it is not appropriate to interrupt a team activity like that, and again told her noone is going to be discriminating against her daughter. So today I get a call from the city letting me know she filed a complaint and is taking her child off of my team because I told her she had to hide her sexuality at our practices so it wouldn't bother other parents. I dont recall my exact wording but it was not mean, the word hiding or even sexuality didnt come out of my mouth. I only asked her not to interrupt our practices and tried to assure he that I don't care what her sexual preference is, I am there to teach baseball and the other parents are only there to watch.

Was I wrong to ask her to stop what she was doing?

The important thing to remember is that you objected to the parents interrupting the children while they were introducing themselves to each other. Your objection had nothing to do with the content of what they were saying - only the timing.
 
If she is as bad as you described, invite her to a meeting with the city and let her talk. They'll quickly understand the problem.

As for the crybabies in this thread that swear "this is how it is in the U.S. now", please... get a grip, nobody sane considers that acceptable behavior or "PC".

We weren't talking about the "sane", we were talking about the ultra PC left. Don't know who you think you're fooling. The more you try to tell him he's got nothing to worry about, the more I'm thinking you're trying to lull him into being unprepared. I'm on to you.
 
I don't know what she said, but yes there are two sides I'm sure. At the very least I know my intent but don't remember what I said exactly.

See you on CNN. :lol:
 
N
I coach for the city here where i live. Varying sports for ages 4-13 depending on where they need help coaching. For baseball this year one of my teams is a 4-5 year old t ball team. We had our first practice last night and two women came with a little girl. I introduced myself and said hi and they immediately went on a little speech about how they are together, they are lesbians, they are raising this girl together, nothing wrong with that. Then go into whats going to happen if I discriminate against their daughter because of their sexuality, threatening lawsuits and explaining that there are laws ect. I told them I was there to teach their daughter softball, and their sexual orientation was not a factor at all and moved along. As I am meeting other parents a few of them commented that this lady had approached them and gave them a similar speech out of nowhere. After all the kids were there I gathered the kids together and started off having the kids introduce themselves to their teammates. No additional information really, just kid would say my name is Earl. And everyone would say Hi Earl to start to learn teammates names. When the little girl told everyone her name, again the lady popped into action giving her speech to everyone out there. I stopped her after about a minute and spoke to her privately, or as privately as I could on a baseball field, and let her know that it is not appropriate to interrupt a team activity like that, and again told her noone is going to be discriminating against her daughter. So today I get a call from the city letting me know she filed a complaint and is taking her child off of my team because I told her she had to hide her sexuality at our practices so it wouldn't bother other parents. I dont recall my exact wording but it was not mean, the word hiding or even sexuality didnt come out of my mouth. I only asked her not to interrupt our practices and tried to assure he that I don't care what her sexual preference is, I am there to teach baseball and the other parents are only there to watch.

Was I wrong to ask her to stop what she was doing?

You Were absolutely not wrong. What a world.
 
Back
Top Bottom