View Poll Results: PTSD: do we forget about family members involved

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  • Yes

    5 3.70%
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    52 38.52%
  • They can suck it up, they weren't the ones fighting for our country

    76 56.30%
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Thread: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

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    PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    I think American Sniper was the first movie( other than Brothers) that showed what the family goes through, but it only touched on it. I think our returning service members who suffer from PTSD should be offered any and all services that benefit them. I feel for those who come back injured or psychologically tormented, but often times, the residual trickles into family life and the family silently suffers as well. A wife who rides it out is considered strong and supportive. Do you think that we as a society only think about the Soldier/Airmen/Marine etc? Do we forget about the people they live with, and how it's affecting them?

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    Re: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    I can tell you first hand, NO ONE cares about the families. No one thinks about the families. Unless its YOUR family, you are isolated in your grief and suffering.
    That is the reality.

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    Re: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    I am a bit conflicted about this issue as a whole. On one hand, I think we need to give as much support as possible to the servicemen and women who have service-related PTSD. Otoh, they signed up for the job, and war is hell. I'm just not sure that because a man (or woman) voluntarily signs up for military service, that we owe the family, for what could become the rest of their lives.

    Imo, someone who joins up, willingly putting himself at risk, should be doubly cautious about that decision, as the long-term repercussions can be horrible to a young family.
    "God is the name by which I designate all things which cross my path violently and recklessly, all things which alter my plans and intentions, and change the course of my life, for better or for worse."
    -C G Jung

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    Re: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    Quote Originally Posted by CRUE CAB View Post
    I can tell you first hand, NO ONE cares about the families. No one thinks about the families. Unless its YOUR family, you are isolated in your grief and suffering.
    That is the reality.
    So...I spent 20 years in the service. I deployed 7 times. When I was away from the base, I was done...away from the base. Even when we lived on the installation, I didnt have much of a desire to engage in base activities. As a result, I missed out on a lot of potential services for my family. They were there. They were always there. I didnt know about them and my wife wasnt told about them. But they were there.

    Since we reengaged in 2002, there has been a ton of money poured into family programs. Military One Source, Army One Source, Army COmmunity Service, Air Force and Navy Family Assistance Centers, Military Family Life Consultants...there are so many programs and services offered and available to the spouse and families of AD soldiers. Add to them the FRGs, the Wives Groups, the Yellow Ribbon Campaigns, Clinical support via SWS and Behavioral Health at military hospitals. Where familes experience secondary symptoms of PTSD (Itself a secondary problem), there are programs specifically designed to target those areas as well. Financial Readiness, Resiliency Campuses, Substance Abuse Programs, Domestic Violence Victim Advocacy...again...TONS of resources. The Army set up special additional services like the Soldier Family Assistance Centers designed specifically to help spouses and families of deployed service members.

    Our biggest problem is not available services. Our biggest problem is getting the message to the families about the available services.

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    Re: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    Quote Originally Posted by lizzie View Post
    I am a bit conflicted about this issue as a whole. On one hand, I think we need to give as much support as possible to the servicemen and women who have service-related PTSD. Otoh, they signed up for the job, and war is hell. I'm just not sure that because a man (or woman) voluntarily signs up for military service, that we owe the family, for what could become the rest of their lives.

    Imo, someone who joins up, willingly putting himself at risk, should be doubly cautious about that decision, as the long-term repercussions can be horrible to a young family.
    No one knows how they will react from the experience of war. Prior to going.

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    Re: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    Quote Originally Posted by CRUE CAB View Post
    No one knows how they will react from the experience of war. Prior to going.
    I realize that, but it's not hard to figure out that going to war and killing people can have pretty severe effects. My point is that more consideration should probably be put into making such a serious decision, and that dragging your young wife and children into such a scarring environment is probably unwise.

    It's sort of like me going into nursing thirty years ago, then bitching because I have to deal with sick people, and deal with bodily fluids and dying. I signed up for it. It's stressful as hell, and more than one nurse has gone off the deep end because the job sucks. Do we owe anyone who has job stress-related depression for the rest of their lives?
    "God is the name by which I designate all things which cross my path violently and recklessly, all things which alter my plans and intentions, and change the course of my life, for better or for worse."
    -C G Jung

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    Re: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    Oo
    Quote Originally Posted by lizzie View Post
    I am a bit conflicted about this issue as a whole. On one hand, I think we need to give as much support as possible to the servicemen and women who have service-related PTSD. Otoh, they signed up for the job, and war is hell. I'm just not sure that because a man (or woman) voluntarily signs up for military service, that we owe the family, for what could become the rest of their lives.

    Imo, someone who joins up, willingly putting himself at risk, should be doubly cautious about that decision, as the long-term repercussions can be horrible to a young family.
    I'm not talking in the sense of "owing" the family, more that you never really hear the media talk about the family. Issues are ongoing long after the war. Remnants of anger, short temper, no tbeing comfortable in crowds, limiting places you can go, etc.

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    Re: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    Quote Originally Posted by herenow1 View Post
    I think American Sniper was the first movie( other than Brothers) that showed what the family goes through, but it only touched on it. I think our returning service members who suffer from PTSD should be offered any and all services that benefit them. I feel for those who come back injured or psychologically tormented, but often times, the residual trickles into family life and the family silently suffers as well. A wife who rides it out is considered strong and supportive. Do you think that we as a society only think about the Soldier/Airmen/Marine etc? Do we forget about the people they live with, and how it's affecting them?
    I appreciate the sentiment here but I'm not sure what you're getting at. I think there are many dangerous jobs and in most cases there is a brotherhood/sisterhood that develops among those in the profession and the families that support them. When a police officer dies during duty, police officers from all over the world congregate at that funeral service to show respect and to honour the service and that goes on with firefighters as well, as examples. I also think that those professions look to the care of the families left behind as well.

    The difference may be in where tragedy occurs. With police/firefighters, their danger is where they live and the families live that danger every day, read and hear about it every day and the families share the experiences every day. Soldiers, however, experience their danger, for the most part, oceans away, generally by themselves, and they often suffer it internally in order to be outwardly brave and unaffected. As such, the societal closeness and protection you refer to isn't readily available for either the soldier or his/her family.

    I know my father, after serving in WWII, was very disillusioned and felt abandoned by the government and those he served with when he got home. It took years for him and he never really forgave.

    To answer your question, maybe it's the families of soldiers who forget other families of soldiers and they need to find ways to be more connected and supportive of each other rather than expect society in general to be understanding and supportive of something they can't appreciate.
    "Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views." William F. Buckley Jr.

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    Re: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    Quote Originally Posted by herenow1 View Post
    Oo

    I'm not talking in the sense of "owing" the family, more that you never really hear the media talk about the family. Issues are ongoing long after the war. Remnants of anger, short temper, no tbeing comfortable in crowds, limiting places you can go, etc.
    Well, I'm not sure that there's any reason that the media needs to be talking about them either. Imo, those issues are better addressed privately via counseling and other resources available.
    "God is the name by which I designate all things which cross my path violently and recklessly, all things which alter my plans and intentions, and change the course of my life, for better or for worse."
    -C G Jung

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    Re: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    Quote Originally Posted by CRUE CAB View Post
    I can tell you first hand, NO ONE cares about the families. No one thinks about the families. Unless its YOUR family, you are isolated in your grief and suffering.
    That is the reality.


    Great charity:

    https://www.fisherhouse.org/about/


    A lot of us care about the whole military family.


    https://www.mcsf.org/


    Bob Woodruff Foundation




    There are a bunch more, that said, the government could really care less about injured veterans for the most part.
    Let evil swiftly befall those who have wrongly condemned us

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