View Poll Results: PTSD: do we forget about family members involved

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  • Yes

    5 3.70%
  • No

    52 38.52%
  • They can suck it up, they weren't the ones fighting for our country

    76 56.30%
  • Other

    2 1.48%
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Thread: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

  1. #21
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    Re: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    Quote Originally Posted by CanadaJohn View Post
    Good morning Lady P - milder here today, but the freeze is coming back later in the week - hope all is good with you.

    I don't know about the robots part - I guess you could call drones robots in that they're unmanned and are controlled by humans outside of the battlefield. But robots are exceedingly expensive at this point.
    Maybe I've seen too many Star Wars movies, but they used on-the-ground type robots with legs that enabled them to rapidly get up-front and personal about destroying an enemy one on one. With all the latest technology we have at our fingertips, it doesn't seem too far-fetched to think it's possible. It would spare humans from being shipped halfway the world to die or suffer injuries that last a lifetime - both mentally and physically. In addition, we are not reproducing ourselves fast enough to halt the decline in our numbers in the Western world, while they seem to breed like rabbits in the ME! Go figure...

    We are currently at 17 degrees, but dropping to the minuses tonight, and tomorrow is showing we're only going to get to a high of -2 and dropping to double digit minuses tomorrow night. Maybe by the weekend it will improve a little - not that 10 degrees for a high is anything to cheer about! : I see a lot of replacing bushes and fruits due to winterkill in my near future!

  2. #22
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    Re: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    Quote Originally Posted by Aunt Spiker View Post
    I wish I could say it's all very helpful - but what's available and how efficient it is varies widely state to state and where you live in relation to certain help centers.

    I have 3 mentally ill people in this home on medication and seeking out therapy - I'm worn the **** out between their needs and beyond those necessities I have no time or energy for much anything else.

    White flag - I surrendered a long time ago.
    It's good your H is being treAted. It's even scarier when they think there's no problem.

  3. #23
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    Re: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    Quote Originally Posted by VanceMack View Post
    Im sure. I wish there was some sort of catch all. I mentioned the families of guard and reservists...some people live 2-3 hundred miles from their drill locations. Its really difficult to get services out to them as well. The VA has been using traveling/mobile care centers and doing a lot of work with tele-outreach.

    Not saying its perfect but that there ARE a lot of resources. I believe we in the military are often our families worst enemies when it comes to making people aware of what is actually available.

    Anyway...take this for what it is worth. I am pretty connected in with support services and if there is ever anything I could help with, please feel free to PM me. No promises and I'm sure you have already checked things out. Just sayin. And sincere good thoughts for you and your family.
    Thank you.

    Quote Originally Posted by herenow1 View Post
    It's good your H is being treAted. It's even scarier when they think there's no problem.
    Everyone just gets worn out after a while. You always know there's something wrong but damnit - it's just exhausting to focus on all the time.

    For one: you're never truly 'healed' - you're always in a state of 'coping'.
    For another: it's constant - or random and sporadic. After time everyone involved just gets exhausted with the whole thing, especially the one who's sick.

    I can't blame my husband for getting tired of appointments, questions, unease, therapy, pills - repeat. When he relapses it starts with him not going to an appointment or two because he has other things he wants to do with his time.

    I have a hard time holding him to it, I really do - because I always feel like he and we have gone through enough of the 'treatment' and need a break . . . but there is no break. It's not like a broken leg that gets better - it's a disease that has no cure.

    And repeat - and repeat . . . it's just endless. Time doesn't seem to diminish it, either. In fact, I think time makes it worse because then other health problems develop and worsen. My husband at first ONLY had mental health issues and some physical injuries to recover from.

    Now his mental issues have worsened. He has breathing, neurological and psychological, physical, intestinal and cardiac issues. It's like his body is breaking down piece by piece and that's making all of his mental issues MUCH worse.
    A screaming comes across the sky.
    It has happened before, but there is nothing to compare it to now.
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  4. #24
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    Re: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    Quote Originally Posted by VanceMack View Post
    MilitaryOneSource pays for 12 free sessions for any family member. VA services are free. ArmyOne SOurce, ACS, SFACs, military SWS and Behavioral Health Services...all provided free. VA PTSD clinic services...all free.

    Save your partisan ramblings for a topic they might actually apply to.
    They apply to this issue. There isn't a VA clinic in every town in the country and "12 free sessions" are meaningless for people who will have a lifetime of issues.

  5. #25
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    Re: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    Quote Originally Posted by Declan View Post
    They apply to this issue. There isn't a VA clinic in every town in the country and "12 free sessions" are meaningless for people who will have a lifetime of issues.
    12 free sessions is a start. There are a ton of resources available as I have demonstrated. The facts wont matter to you if all you care about is turning this into some sort of partisan rant.

  6. #26
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    Re: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    Quote Originally Posted by Aunt Spiker View Post
    Thank you.



    Everyone just gets worn out after a while. You always know there's something wrong but damnit - it's just exhausting to focus on all the time.

    For one: you're never truly 'healed' - you're always in a state of 'coping'.
    For another: it's constant - or random and sporadic. After time everyone involved just gets exhausted with the whole thing, especially the one who's sick.

    I can't blame my husband for getting tired of appointments, questions, unease, therapy, pills - repeat. When he relapses it starts with him not going to an appointment or two because he has other things he wants to do with his time.

    I have a hard time holding him to it, I really do - because I always feel like he and we have gone through enough of the 'treatment' and need a break . . . but there is no break. It's not like a broken leg that gets better - it's a disease that has no cure.

    And repeat - and repeat . . . it's just endless. Time doesn't seem to diminish it, either. In fact, I think time makes it worse because then other health problems develop and worsen. My husband at first ONLY had mental health issues and some physical injuries to recover from.

    Now his mental issues have worsened. He has breathing, neurological and psychological, physical, intestinal and cardiac issues. It's like his body is breaking down piece by piece and that's making all of his mental issues MUCH worse.
    I have a real problem with the VA treatment models. They teach processes that help people cope with a lifetime of symptoms without ever really getting to the problem and dealing with the problem. Mindfulness strategies are OK in helping deal with immediate symptoms but dont help resolve the incident trauma. Often the incident trauma is just a cap on other preexisting issues or issues since. The latest theory offered by the VA is that the traumatic incident causes actual brain damage and keeps the trauma incident in a closed 'loop' in the brain and memory.

  7. #27
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    Re: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    Quote Originally Posted by herenow1 View Post
    I think American Sniper was the first movie( other than Brothers) that showed what the family goes through, but it only touched on it. I think our returning service members who suffer from PTSD should be offered any and all services that benefit them. I feel for those who come back injured or psychologically tormented, but often times, the residual trickles into family life and the family silently suffers as well. A wife who rides it out is considered strong and supportive. Do you think that we as a society only think about the Soldier/Airmen/Marine etc? Do we forget about the people they live with, and how it's affecting them?
    Citizens should get the help they need in general.
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  8. #28
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    Re: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    Quote Originally Posted by VanceMack View Post
    I have a real problem with the VA treatment models. They teach processes that help people cope with a lifetime of symptoms without ever really getting to the problem and dealing with the problem. Mindfulness strategies are OK in helping deal with immediate symptoms but dont help resolve the incident trauma. Often the incident trauma is just a cap on other preexisting issues or issues since. The latest theory offered by the VA is that the traumatic incident causes actual brain damage and keeps the trauma incident in a closed 'loop' in the brain and memory.
    The VA?

    Somehow the military did this: They processed my husband out - to medical retirement . . . and then they reprocessed him BACK IN. According to military files he's still ACTIVE DUTY.

    So - of course - the VA has pulled benefits (not fully- but enough to where it hurts). We're living off of savings and between being a full time caregiver I'm unable to actually get a full time job outside of the house (not like anyone's going to hire me anyway).

    Thankfully I'm making my author / copy-editing efforts come around to some sort of income. Ugh. I'm planning on writing some stories that sell well and then I'll take a solo vacay to Hawaii and jump into a volcano. LOL

    --

    Beyond the trouble that comes when not a damned thing goes right - I can't make heads or tails over what the VA actually OFFERS around here. Everyone I have ever discussed things with reports me to someone else - can't answer questions - and simply doesn't know much about anything. They are probably the dumbest people I've ever had to deal with.
    Last edited by Aunt Spiker; 02-18-15 at 07:42 PM.
    A screaming comes across the sky.
    It has happened before, but there is nothing to compare it to now.
    Pynchon - Gravity's Rainbow

  9. #29
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    Re: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    Quote Originally Posted by Aunt Spiker View Post
    The VA?

    Somehow the military did this: They processed my husband out - to medical retirement . . . and then they reprocessed him BACK IN. According to military files he's still ACTIVE DUTY.

    So - of course - the VA has pulled benefits (not fully- but enough to where it hurts). We're living off of savings and between being a full time caregiver I'm unable to actually get a full time job outside of the house (not like anyone's going to hire me anyway).

    Thankfully I'm making my author / copy-editing efforts come around to some sort of income. Ugh. I'm planning on writing some stories that sell well and then I'll take a solo vacay to Hawaii and jump into a volcano. LOL

    --

    Beyond the trouble that comes when not a damned thing goes right - I can't make heads or tails over what the VA actually OFFERS around here. Everyone I have ever discussed things with reports me to someone else - can't answer questions - and simply doesn't know much about anything. They are probably the dumbest people I've ever had to deal with.
    Wow...so...he's back on Active Duty? Is he drawing a paycheck? That doesnt make a ton of sense. But then...Ive seen more **** than a little bit with the military personnel folks that doesnt make a ton of sense.

    Have you checked with your states veterans affairs officer?
    Last edited by VanceMack; 02-18-15 at 08:08 PM.

  10. #30
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    Re: PTSD: do we forget about the wives/families?

    Quote Originally Posted by VanceMack View Post
    Wow...so...he's back on Active Duty? Is he drawing a paycheck? That doesnt make a ton of sense. But then...Ive seen more **** than a little bit with the military personnel folks that doesnt make a ton of sense.
    It's just a paperwork error. This often happens because the military is in the stone age etching things on stacks of slate tablets. He's not pulling active duty services. In fact, he's in college. But until the Military reclassifies him properly and fixes this error (it's been 4 months since we caught it) we're in this strange floating zone where he can't do certain things through the VA because of it.
    A screaming comes across the sky.
    It has happened before, but there is nothing to compare it to now.
    Pynchon - Gravity's Rainbow

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