View Poll Results: is it ever allowable for a Parent to punish their child with force?

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  • Yes

    46 66.67%
  • No

    15 21.74%
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Thread: Parents: Punishing Kids [W:361]

  1. #271
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    Re: Parents: Punishing Kids

    Quote Originally Posted by disneydude View Post
    I never claimed to "know everything about your son". However, it doesn't take a rocket science to know that hitting kids is not only not the most effective way to teach a child discipline it teaches children that using physical violence is the way to deal with your problems. I'm guessing that is a lesson that you learned from your parents.
    Not true. Not true at all. On what do you base this? Where is your evidence? That's like saying violent video games is resulting in more gun violence in the US.

    My dad spanked me, even smacked me on the head from time to time. I didn't once think that that means I should use violence to solve my problems. THAT lesson came at recess at school, when the bullies came. I learned THERE that violence can sole at least SOME problems. Now? Now I never have to be violent.

    So do tell how me about myself, would you?
    Quote Originally Posted by calamity View Post
    Reports indicate that everyone knew he was hauling a bunch of guns up there. But, since you brought it up, there's something which should be illegal: guns that breakdown.

  2. #272
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    Re: Parents: Punishing Kids

    Quote Originally Posted by ttwtt78640 View Post
    Is it acceptable to refuse all further contact with (and support of) your employee or neighbor? How about your dependents?

    With special responsibilities come special rights (and vice versa).
    And thus my advise: Keep clear of kids.

  3. #273
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    Re: Parents: Punishing Kids

    Quote Originally Posted by Peter King View Post
    but this is not a crime discussion, this is a spanking/physical punishment discussion with regard to children.

    Children might break rules, but how can a child ever (especially at a young age) make rhyme or reason for their parents hugging and embracing them and then those same parents who you rely on for love and comfort go ape**** and take out of branch of a tree/belt/end of wood to beat the crap out of you?

    Yes, children must be punished if they break rules, but to take your hand to them (or something in your hand) gives off the wrong message. It gives off the message that the ones who love you may hurt you. That violence is the best option to punish rule breakers. That using your voice and reason is second/third/forth to a good old beating.

    That kind of message gives a child the wrong message because there is a good chance he will have a negative relationship with that parent, he will repeat the same behaviors in his life (whether it be on the street, in school, in his later relationship or towards his/her own child).

    And there are countless of options parents can take instead of a physical assault on their own flesh and blood to discipline them. The only thing (according to most if not all experts) is that you have to be consequent and that is where most parents fail, especially the beating ones because often that parent is very very angry when they decide to punish that child and act accordingly. Learning out of fear is not a desirable way to teach anything to any living thing.
    First, Bold part: Think you meant Consistent. And being consistent is a must in anything, not just child rearing.

    Also you're making several assumptions for those that spank their children. 1st assumption: That those that spank their child only do so when angry. That is actually false. Might be true for some yes. But it is not always the case. I spank my children. I'm never angry when I do. In fact I purposely avoid doing so when I am angry. Second false assumption is that those that spank their children ONLY use spanking and no other means of punishment. Third assumption is that those that spank their children never warn or explain consequences before spanking their child. My children know full well what their punishments are for any given thing that they do wrong and WHY they are to be punished should they break a rule. Be it sitting in a corner to being grounded in their room to spanking and all the other options in between.
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  4. #274
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    Re: Parents: Punishing Kids

    Quote Originally Posted by KevinKohler View Post
    Not true. Not true at all. On what do you base this? Where is your evidence? That's like saying violent video games is resulting in more gun violence in the US.

    My dad spanked me, even smacked me on the head from time to time. I didn't once think that that means I should use violence to solve my problems. THAT lesson came at recess at school, when the bullies came. I learned THERE that violence can sole at least SOME problems. Now? Now I never have to be violent.

    So do tell how me about myself, would you?
    Actually it is absolutely true...and your analogy involving video games is completely baseless. You may not believe that your Dad smacking you taught you that lesson, but it is clear that it did.
    <font size=5><b>Its been several weeks since the Vegas shooting.  Its it still "Too Early" or can we start having the conversation about finally doing something about these mass shootings???​</b></font>

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    Re: Parents: Punishing Kids

    Quote Originally Posted by Jerry View Post
    I honestly have no idea who that is.
    He's the running back for the Minnesota Vikings.
    Quote Originally Posted by truthatallcost View Post
    Pepe Booth strikes again.

  6. #276
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    Re: Parents: Punishing Kids

    Quote Originally Posted by Jesse Booth View Post
    He's the running back for the Minnesota Vikings.
    I literally don't know what a 'running back' is, I don't even follow hockey.

  7. #277
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    Re: Parents: Punishing Kids

    Quote Originally Posted by KevinKohler View Post
    We can say what we want about corporal punishment. I got spanked as a kid. I never interpreted it to mean that the ones I love are the ones I should fear. I interpreted it as if I choose to do things that I know will result in my being spanked, don't get caught.

    And honestly, the belt shouldn't really start till they are, what, 8 or 9? I can't really recall, but...I only remember getting the belt when I was a bit older, not a toddler. Bu to try to hide your child from violence forever will simply result in a RUDE awakening when they are teenagers.


    Humans are violent. And EVENTUALLY, one way or another, that fact WILL be driven home to your children.
    An adult who hits a child is nothing more than a coward.
    <font size=5><b>Its been several weeks since the Vegas shooting.  Its it still "Too Early" or can we start having the conversation about finally doing something about these mass shootings???​</b></font>

  8. #278
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    Re: Parents: Punishing Kids

    Quote Originally Posted by nota bene View Post
    Even toddlers hear the authority of the male voice. They know.


    I currently have my niece and her two sons (8 and 4) living in my home temporarily. Mostly I leave them to her when they misbehave. She has noted, with what appears to be a mix of gratitude and frustration, that they obey me more readily and quickly than they do her.


    (Not to disparage her in any way, she's done good work with them and they're pretty good boys overall. Boys in particular, though, seem to respond to male authority more readily for some reason. Of course they've known me since they were born, so we have an already-established relationship.)

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    Re: Parents: Punishing Kids

    Quote Originally Posted by Kal'Stang View Post
    First, Bold part: Think you meant Consistent. And being consistent is a must in anything, not just child rearing.

    Also you're making several assumptions for those that spank their children. 1st assumption: That those that spank their child only do so when angry. That is actually false. Might be true for some yes. But it is not always the case. I spank my children. I'm never angry when I do. In fact I purposely avoid doing so when I am angry. Second false assumption is that those that spank their children ONLY use spanking and no other means of punishment. Third assumption is that those that spank their children never warn or explain consequences before spanking their child. My children know full well what their punishments are for any given thing that they do wrong and WHY they are to be punished should they break a rule. Be it sitting in a corner to being grounded in their room to spanking and all the other options in between.

    Thank you and well said.


    There seems to be an assumption on the part of those who disparage it, that parents who spank are wild animals who do so only in out of control anger, and who never use other methods or talk with their child.

    Nothing could be further from the truth of course.

    Like most parents, I reserved spanking as more of a last resort, or a response to certain specific and serious misbehaviors which had to be corrected emphatically and immediately (safety issues, and open defiance, mainly). I ALWAYS explained carefully what the child had done and why it was a "spanking offense". I used other common methods as well, and let the corrective method fit the infraction.

    So do most good parents I know who use spanking.

    Fiddling While Rome Burns
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  10. #280
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    Re: Parents: Punishing Kids

    Quote Originally Posted by Kal'Stang View Post
    First, Bold part: Think you meant Consistent. And being consistent is a must in anything, not just child rearing.

    Also you're making several assumptions for those that spank their children. 1st assumption: That those that spank their child only do so when angry. That is actually false. Might be true for some yes. But it is not always the case. I spank my children. I'm never angry when I do. In fact I purposely avoid doing so when I am angry. Second false assumption is that those that spank their children ONLY use spanking and no other means of punishment. Third assumption is that those that spank their children never warn or explain consequences before spanking their child. My children know full well what their punishments are for any given thing that they do wrong and WHY they are to be punished should they break a rule. Be it sitting in a corner to being grounded in their room to spanking and all the other options in between.
    You are absolutely right, in Dutch "Consequent" means consistent.

    And I am not assuming things. Nine times out of ten the parents will be very calm when beating their child but I have seen myself that parents get angry and frustrated and smack a child.

    I do not think or assume that spanking is the only punishment because that would be a very very bad way of parenting, but I am of the opinion that beating is never an appropriate form of punishing your child.

    And you can justify it and I am not demonizing you for spanking, but I am of the opinion that dr. Phil and countless other experts are right and that corporal punishment is only a short term solution to a problem.
    Former military man (and now babysitter of Donald Trump) John Kelly, is a big loud lying empty barrel!

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