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Crossing the line Nazi (for lack of a better description) kind of stuff. Executing people is probably way over the top but firing into a crowd with women and children or detonating a car with unknown occupants. I don't know the possibility's because I have never been in combat but I am sure there are situations that merit individual soldiers moral input.
No member of the military is required to follow an illegal order. The UCMJ sets what an illegal order would be, to include breaking the various Conventions of War. So, no, a member of the military would not have to follow an order to fire into a crowd of women and children or use a car bomb as a weapon.
Good question - with the parameters you added. It's less of a moral question as it would be a question of legality. Especially since what I said is also true, that many of the actions taken during combat could be seen as immoral by some people. That's why the military relies upon the UCMJ and the various Conventions on War to define and guide their actions, not morality.