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Large age gap marriages - Icky?

Marraiges with large age gaps should be banned

  • Total voters
    47
Middleground said:
Nah. More like "as soon as I smash you over the head with a lamp." :2razz:
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Guess which one has been married the longest.... :lamo:

Greetings, Middleground. :2wave:
 
I don't have a problem with it as long as both parties are willing. I don't think relationships like that will last long, the difference in maturity is too large to be overcome in most cases. But it shouldn't be banned.
 
Middleground said:
Yes but it's because women were -- and still are -- second class citizens.
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To the bolded- I call bull****. I have never considered myself a second class citizen, and would never put up with being treated as such. I don't consider myself superior to a man, but certainly not inferior either.
 
RabidAlpaca said:
I think there should be no restrictions on the marriage decisions of legal adults. That being said, 16 is not a legal adult and this guy belongs in prison.
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There are states, and I know Rhode Island was one of them but I don't know if it still is, where a girl can get married, with parental permission, as young as 13. Like I said, I have no idea if any states are still like this, I just know it was many, many moons ago.
 
voyager1 said:
I have found that guys who have relationships with older women are looking for a mother figure in their lives. Women who date older guys as a whole are looking for a father figure to support them financially. Generally the guys I have known who date older women have been stable and with good money and earnings. I found that not the case with the women with older guys.
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To the bolded- I have seen that up close and personal, but I don't think it was a search for a mother figure, but rather the result of a poorly formed concept of women that occurred during childhood, due to some very dysfunctional family dynamics. Women who seem drawn toward older men seem to be looking for someone to take charge and exert some control over their lives- not necessarily in a fatherly manner, but in a dominant partner way. It is a way for the woman to avoid taking responsibility for problems in the relationship.
 
Cephus said:
The last figures I saw put the overall divorce rate at 51-52%. And yes, I think that's utterly pathetic too.
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It is, and what is even more disturbing (imo) is that so many people never even bother to get married and give their children an intact family environment in the first place.
 
lizzie said:
It is, and what is even more disturbing (imo) is that so many people never even bother to get married and give their children an intact family environment in the first place.
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Because lots of people are shallow and irresponsible. Their children usually grow up the same way.
 
obvious Child said:
Of course it's transparent. This is a mockery of a certain group who's arguments rest on "but it's icky!"
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Those people deserve to be mocked. They have a stupid argument.
 
Meh, my husband is 18 years older than me, but I don't find it icky. Not at all. In fact, We've been together for almost 19 years, and are in love just as much now as we were 19 years ago. :shrug:

You can't put limitations on who you're going to fall in love with. Black, white, purple, same sex, donkeys (sorry, was reading another thread....) -- true love is hard enough as it is without putting stupid limitations on who you can, or cannot fall in love with.
 
lizzie said:
To the bolded- I call bull****. I have never considered myself a second class citizen, and would never put up with being treated as such. I don't consider myself superior to a man, but certainly not inferior either.
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Just because YOU have never experienced discrimination, it does not mean that it doesn't happen.
 
Middleground said:
Just because YOU have never experienced discrimination, it does not mean that it doesn't happen.
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Of course it happens. That doesn't mean a woman must respond to it as such, or act as if it's legitimate. One of the reasons people get treated poorly (and it happens to men as well) is because they don't demand otherwise. In this day and time, if you let someone walk on you, then don't be surprised that they do.
 
lizzie said:
Of course it happens. That doesn't mean a woman must respond to it as such, or act as if it's legitimate. One of the reasons people get treated poorly (and it happens to men as well) is because they don't demand otherwise. In this day and time, if you let someone walk on you, then don't be surprised that they do.
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Although I agree, it's not always that simple, Lizzie.
 
Middleground said:
Although I agree, it's not always that simple, Lizzie.
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If you are willing to assert yourself, and take it all the way to the mat (or to the top if need be), it is. I have never been treated as a second class citizen. I have never been discriminated against. Maybe it's just my attitude, and that I get the message across that I won't put up with it, but I have rarely seen any woman who was treated that way, without cause. I just don't think it's nearly as common as some would have you think.
 
So is the point of this thread to protest large age gaps or people under 18 getting married to middle-aged (and older) people?

If it's the first, I don't agree at all because if a 30 year old wants to marry a 70 year old...fine with me.

If it's the second, I see the point but I have a problem banning someone from getting married even though they are old enough to have a child. I am not certain about this, but it seems to me once you can mother/father children, you probably should be able to marry.

And vote for that matter...but that is for another thread.
 
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DA60 said:
So is the point of this thread to protest large age gaps or people under 18 getting married to middle-aged (and older) people?
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No. The point of the thread is to show that some people are behaving irrationally by being against marriage on the notion of icky, aka, same sex marriage.

If it's okay for this obviously icky marriage to be approved....why not same sex? Just because we may find it unappealing and gross does not dictate that we prohibit such a marriage.

See WHC who voted no for banning but is strongly against same sex marriage. I guess it's icky but okay if they're straight, but its icky and not okay if they're gay.
 
DA60 said:
So is the point of this thread to protest large age gaps or people under 18 getting married to middle-aged (and older) people?

If it's the first, I don't agree at all because if a 30 year old wants to marry a 70 year old...fine with me.

If it's the second, I see the point but I have a problem banning someone from getting married even though they are old enough to have a child. I am not certain about this, but it seems to me once you can mother/father children, you probably should be able to marry.

And vote for that matter...but that is for another thread.
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Clarification....I am referring to 16 and 17 year olds when I talk about marriage and voting...not 15 and under.
 
lizzie said:
If you are willing to assert yourself, and take it all the way to the mat (or to the top if need be), it is. I have never been treated as a second class citizen. I have never been discriminated against. Maybe it's just my attitude, and that I get the message across that I won't put up with it, but I have rarely seen any woman who was treated that way, without cause. I just don't think it's nearly as common as some would have you think.
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Will asserting yourself get you the paid maternity leave you need or is the government going to continue to ignore this fact of life?
Will asserting yourself get you more representation politically, so that politicians can be more in touch with female issues? Or will they still continue to know what is best for us?
Will asserting yourself get more women in high positions or will it make you be considered a loud-mouthed bitch?
Will asserting yourself get you that job even if you're a plain jane?

Maybe collectively, change can happen. But until then, your opinion is too simplistic. It's like me saying men should be more open-mnded and less judgemental and that should iron things out. Gender inequality issues are just waaaaay more complicated.
 
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