Re: Homeschooling
Near as I can figure, for most people, "socialization" can mean either one of two things with regard to children.
A) That they learn to behave like everyone else around them so that they "fit in" with society at large and its prevailing social mores.
or
B) That they learn to easily interact with everyone else, so that they are not social outcasts.
I think position B) has at least some merit, but position A) is nothing less than complete authoritarian nonsense.
I think position B) has an incredible amount of merit, and homeschoolers usually don't learn it. That's not to say they can't, if the parents make a sufficient effort to do it, but the vast majority don't. The fact is that the degree of socialization you get in school is hard to replace when just one or two people are trying to cart you around by themselves.
I know two homeschooled people well.
One believes homeschooling actually ruined her life for this reason. She had to spend years in therapy and re-socializing herself to function at any kind of adult level, which she didn't achieve until her late 20's.
The other guy I know is now in his 30's, and is so poorly socialized that he is perpetually moving down the age bracket in his friendships and relationships. They are all in the 17 to 22 range, and they all drop him once they get older than that because he is so immature and so poor at communication. He even dresses like a teenager. He's frozen in a place most of us grew out of in mid-high school, and he does attribute this to homeschooling, although he has little desire to change it, it seems.
Again, is it possible to cover B) while homeschooling? Sure. But it seems to be that very few people do.
And for my two cents? As an eccentric who seems to be affected by the injustice of how some treat others and the world the way most people are affected by a physical whipping, I don't think I ever would have been able to function at all if I had not been constantly dealing with socialization all through my childhood. I hated most of it, but there's no way I could have dealt with adulthood if I hadn't been practicing every single day when the stakes were low and I always had a place to retreat.
I agree with you A) is bull****, and most schools encourage A). That's where the parents come in. I essentially went to two schools: normal school, which was mostly just to socialize me and make sure I knew the basics of bureaucracy. And then whatever my dad could manage afterwards -- my deeper forms of knowledge, and how to resist A).
So normal school is certainly not a perfect solution -- it can be damaging in its own right. But, presumably, whoever would have been the homeschool teacher stays home, so they can afford to do this. My dad worked. I have no idea how he pulled it off.