View Poll Results: So do you think the father has a legal right to see his baby born or be in the room?

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  • Yes, he has a legal right and my opinion agrees with that.

    15 22.39%
  • Yes, he has a legal right and in my opinion he shouldnt.

    1 1.49%
  • No, he has no legal right and my opinion agrees with that.

    38 56.72%
  • No, he has no legal right and in my opinion he should.

    3 4.48%
  • Other

    7 10.45%
  • I Love Chicken Parm

    9 13.43%
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Thread: Do you think fathers have a legal right to see thier child born or be in the room?

  1. #61
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    Re: Do you think fathers have a legal right to see thier child born or be in the room

    Quote Originally Posted by Henrin View Post
    This is a situation that is unlike all others
    Not in a hospital it isn't. As far as that goes, it all falls under "medical." No exceptions.

    Quote Originally Posted by Henrin View Post
    and even if it seems like the majority of women want to deny it here on DP, the situation involves both the mother and the father of the child. It's not like the father is unknown and there is more than one potential father, but just the one guy that she has already admitted is the father of the child.
    Being the father will (probably) entitle him to visitation rights, but it doesn't entitle him to skirt important privacy laws.

    Quote Originally Posted by Henrin View Post
    You can consider her choice all wonderful if you want, but I don't.
    Since nobody knows anything about their relationship and subsequent breakup, I wouldn't presume on whether her choice was wonderful or not. I will say however that the right to make that choice is absolutely wonderful.

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    Re: Do you think fathers have a legal right to see thier child born or be in the room

    Quote Originally Posted by Henrin View Post
    This is a situation that is unlike all others and even if it seems like the majority of women want to deny it here on DP, the situation involves both the mother and the father of the child. It's not like the father is unknown and there is more than one potential father, but just the one guy that she has already admitted is the father of the child. You can consider her choice all wonderful if you want, but I don't.
    The situation mainly involves the mother and the child because those are the two who are at risk if there is added stress in the situation, not the father. That is more important than any part the father has here and that is why it is the mother's right to bar him from the delivery room.
    "A woman is like a teabag, you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water." - Eleanor Roosevelt

    Keep your religion out of other people's marriages.

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    Re: Do you think fathers have a legal right to see thier child born or be in the room

    Giving birth is emotionally and physically exhausting, a traumatic event. It's only been in recent years where hospitals have, due to overwhelming requests by birthing mothers who wanted their husbands/SO's to support them through childbirth, that these men have even been allowed in the sterile environment of a birthing suite.

    Roll forward a decade or so, and suddenly the poor woman in the throes of labor finds herself surrounded by two sets of grandparents, both with video film rolling, a few siblings, even a niece and nephew because their parents wanted them to "witness the miracle of birth" at the poor mother-to-be's expense. She doesn't want any of this, but in between contractions can't get a word in edgewise because the damned room is wall to wall people, all laughing, giggling, having a party while she endures some of the most excruciating pain of her life.

    Does this sound farfetched? It's not. I have several friends/acquaintances who found themselves in just such a predicament during their own childbirth process. That scenario is one of the reasons that the hospitals now insist on a list approved by the mother of just who is allowed to be in the delivery room, and limits the number of people on that list.

    This man and this woman created a child together, but when it comes to carrying that child to term and expelling it through the birth canal, the woman is quite frankly on her own. After the child is born, after mother and baby have been medically examined and pronounced healthy, then the baby can and is seen by other family members, which in this case included the child's biological father.

    All this donning of hair shirts and beating of chests is based only on the desire by some that men be allowed to control every facet of the woman's child-bearing process...control being the operative word here. It is silly, particularly since the people involved were estranged and didn't even like each other, and those who make such an argument appear to have their own gender agenda going on, and the well-being of the woman in labor, and by rote the child she is birthing, are quite clearly not part of that agenda.

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    Re: Do you think fathers have a legal right to see thier child born or be in the room

    Quote Originally Posted by DiAnna View Post
    Giving birth is emotionally and physically exhausting, a traumatic event. It's only been in recent years where hospitals have, due to overwhelming requests by birthing mothers who wanted their husbands/SO's to support them through childbirth, that these men have even been allowed in the sterile environment of a birthing suite.

    Roll forward a decade or so, and suddenly the poor woman in the throes of labor finds herself surrounded by two sets of grandparents, both with video film rolling, a few siblings, even a niece and nephew because their parents wanted them to "witness the miracle of birth" at the poor mother-to-be's expense. She doesn't want any of this, but in between contractions can't get a word in edgewise because the damned room is wall to wall people, all laughing, giggling, having a party while she endures some of the most excruciating pain of her life.

    Does this sound farfetched? It's not. I have several friends/acquaintances who found themselves in just such a predicament during their own childbirth process. That scenario is one of the reasons that the hospitals now insist on a list approved by the mother of just who is allowed to be in the delivery room, and limits the number of people on that list.

    This man and this woman created a child together, but when it comes to carrying that child to term and expelling it through the birth canal, the woman is quite frankly on her own. After the child is born, after mother and baby have been medically examined and pronounced healthy, then the baby can and is seen by other family members, which in this case included the child's biological father.

    All this donning of hair shirts and beating of chests is based only on the desire by some that men be allowed to control every facet of the woman's child-bearing process...control being the operative word here. It is silly, particularly since the people involved were estranged and didn't even like each other, and those who make such an argument appear to have their own gender agenda going on, and the well-being of the woman in labor, and by rote the child she is birthing, are quite clearly not part of that agenda.
    Well said.

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    Re: Do you think fathers have a legal right to see thier child born or be in the room

    It should be up to the mother...that should fall under the 'well duh' category.

    The ONLY thing that should matter to the father is the healthy delivery of his child - so whatever makes the mother more comfortable should be ALL that matters to him.

    If she wants him there - fine.

    If she does not - no.


    What kind of pathetic loser of a father wants to force the mother of his child to allow him in court to be in the delivery room?

    How on Earth is that going to help her more successfully deliver their child?

    The latter should be his ONLY concern - clearly this dick is more concerned about his rights then his child.

    From the OP linked article:

    'NPR's Jennifer Ludden explains, "The judge ruled that requiring the father's presence would pose 'unwarranted strain' on the mother."
    "It's just safer in general to have people the mother is most comfortable with to be in the room there with her."'


    Exactly.

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    Re: Do you think fathers have a legal right to see thier child born or be in the room

    Quote Originally Posted by DA60 View Post
    It should be up to the mother...that should fall under the 'well duh' category.

    The ONLY thing that should matter to the father is the healthy delivery of his child - so whatever makes the mother more comfortable should be ALL that matters to him.

    If she wants him there - fine.

    If she does not - no.


    What kind of pathetic loser of a father wants to force the mother of his child to allow him in court to be in the delivery room?

    How on Earth is that going to help her more successfully deliver their child?

    The latter should be his ONLY concern - clearly this dick is more concerned about his rights then his child.

    From the OP linked article:

    'NPR's Jennifer Ludden explains, "The judge ruled that requiring the father's presence would pose 'unwarranted strain' on the mother."
    "It's just safer in general to have people the mother is most comfortable with to be in the room there with her."'


    Exactly.
    Perhaps, but you have to be fair and consider the other side's argument.

    Bruce Eden of Dads Against Discrimination told NJ.com that the ruling was "another example of New Jersey's anti-male discrimination in the family courts." Divorce and custody settlements give fathers financial obligations for child rearing but not the same rights as mothers and wives, he said,

    "It takes two to tango," Eden said. "Why are they allowing only the mother?"
    Mothers can block dads from delivery rooms, New Jersey judge rules | syracuse.com

    He's kind of got a point there, DA60. Why are they only allowing the mother in the delivery room?

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    Re: Do you think fathers have a legal right to see thier child born or be in the room

    Quote Originally Posted by Cardinal View Post
    Perhaps, but you have to be fair and consider the other side's argument.



    Mothers can block dads from delivery rooms, New Jersey judge rules | syracuse.com

    He's kind of got a point there, DA60. Why are they only allowing the mother in the delivery room?
    THe judge summed it up:

    'NPR's Jennifer Ludden explains, "The judge ruled that requiring the father's presence would pose 'unwarranted strain' on the mother."
    "It's just safer in general to have people the mother is most comfortable with to be in the room there with her."'


    Who cares what the 'rights' of the father are...ALL that should matter is the successful delivery of their child.

    As I said, if the mother is sane, then whatever makes her more comfortable should be the ONLY consideration...because the more comfortable she is , the better chance of a safe delivery of their child.

    I do not even begin to care what some whinny Dad wants...my only concern - in this case - is the child.


    I mean what a ding dong this guy is. Obviously if the only way she will allow him in is with a court order, then a 2 year old can figure out this will make her much more nervous/stressed - which could hurt her chances of a successful delivery.

    And since she does not want him there - he is obviously not going to be coaching her or doing ANYTHING useful. SO what is to be gained? Some sentimental nonsense.

    Has this guy never heard of a video camera? He can film the whole thing and see/hear every second of it.

    Is the child going to care one way or the other - no. IS there any way possible his presence - in this situation - can make things go more smoothly? Of course not.

    The only person this matters to is the selfish father...who clearly cares more about his 'rights' then the healthy delivery of his child.

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    Re: Do you think fathers have a legal right to see thier child born or be in the room

    Quote Originally Posted by roguenuke View Post
    There is only one I don't believe that women should have and in reality, they don't totally have, and that's putting the child up for adoption. But unfortunately, some women are bitches who will lie and claim they have no idea who the father is and the adoption agencies are more interested in making money, than doing the right thing. It sucks, but life isn't always fair. The rest are due to the nature of having children, and men and women's natural parts in having those children.
    You want to talk nature and natural parts? Did it not take two to make the baby? Yes some women are bitches, I'd add the woman in this story to that category. I also see men's rights eroding on several counts because women have been allowed to be placed at the level of god over the fetus. She now has the power to determine what child will live and which ones will die even though she does not have the power to create a fetus on her own.

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    Re: Do you think fathers have a legal right to see thier child born or be in the room

    Quote Originally Posted by DA60 View Post
    Who cares what the 'rights' of the father are...ALL that should matter is the successful delivery of their child.

    As I said, if the mother is sane, then whatever makes her more comfortable should be the ONLY consideration...because the more comfortable she is , the better chance of a safe delivery of their child.
    Yes of course because delivering a baby is sort of like delivering a gallon jug of nitroglycerine, if any little thing is not perfectly in place with the dozen skilled professionals in the room, and a birth could easily end up disaster. Dead mother, dead baby, dead people everywhere.

    Yep, that is exactly how births are all around the world--- and for tens of thousands of years-- if a mother is even slightly annoyed, then a successful birth just doesn't happen.

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    Re: Do you think fathers have a legal right to see thier child born or be in the room

    Quote Originally Posted by Del Zeppnile View Post
    Yes of course because delivering a baby is sort of like delivering a gallon jug of nitroglycerine, if any little thing is not perfectly in place with the dozen skilled professionals in the room, and a birth could easily end up disaster. Dead mother, dead baby, dead people everywhere.

    Yep, that is exactly how births are all around the world--- and for tens of thousands of years-- if a mother is even slightly annoyed, then a successful birth just doesn't happen.
    One is left to wonder how many times you have given birth, or even been in the room for one?

    I was the midwife for two of my three children (just my ex and myself)....and can tell you from experience that between the blood, and the cord around my sons neck, it is indeed a dangerous experience.

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