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How We Raise Our Daughters - 21st Century [W:87,158,368]

We should be raising our daughters


  • Total voters
    86
Sure, blame women and the movements started by women to end their oppression, for the social degradation caused by conservative men. You brought us laissez-faire capitalism, where the only value is money and the accumulation of more money, and then you complain about moral decay!

I find it quite hypocritical for liberals to complain about conservatives placing a value on money, when money is the primary tool that liberals use to affect their agenda upon society.
 
Alright, I'm fascinated. Genuinely -- what makes you tick? What is your life story and political stance that makes you think that?


Please....not here...not in this thread.....not now..... aaaaaaaaaaggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.................
 
Alright, I'm fascinated. Genuinely -- what makes you tick? What is your life story and political stance that makes you think that?

If you click on his name and pull up his history of postings, all your questions will be answered.

Not ALL of his 12,000 postings are about his need to degrade women, mind you. I doubt if any more than 11,500 do that.
 
Alright, I'm fascinated. Genuinely -- what makes you tick? What is your life story and political stance that makes you think that?

What makes me tick.... Order. Law & Order. A place for everything/everyone and everything/everyone in their place. I come from a very strict, conservative, and religious family. A family that on both sides has been that way for generations. A family where members have thrown census bureau officers out of homes for refusing to list ethnicity/heritage as "AMERICAN" since those parts of the family have been here for more than 300 years. Tradition, Heritage, and Morality would be keywords for my family. I'm a Conservative, bordering on Authoritarian politically because I do not believe that the American people deserve or can handle the concept of Freedom anymore.

My life story would take a very long time to describe. Suffice it to say that I was born with a significant and very obvious birth defect. It has been a catalyst for much of my view of the world over the last 40 years and how I treat people. If you're really interested in a more in-depth conversation on this topic, please IM me so we don't take the thread any further off-topic than we already are. Thanks.
 
Probably true. I am in a new environment as well. Dana has a much different parenting style than the ex wife did which may play a role.

Right now I am still trying to adjust how I go about things to work with what the little girl's emotional style and level is.

Like "we don't refill the juice until its actually empty" LOL

Who is we?
 
Any girl in my life, niece or daughter of friend, I give 2 pieces of advice.

#1. Don't make a decision that will change the rest of your life. Taking drugs can change their life. Sex can change their life, and so on.

#2. Educate yourself and make your life. After that you can add a man to your life. I can't count how many women I have talked to that got married Young (she was added to his life) and then when the marriage or relationship ended, she was incapable of even getting a job to support the kids because she had never done anything but rely on the man. I hate to see that.
 
Good question. All I can say is he's consistent. I'm guessing he's more bark than bite....and hoping that as well.

Yes, anyone can make up anything they want about themselves on a forum. It doesn't really matter a whole lot if the story is at least plausible and they are consistent, and don't change their stories over time.
 
When it comes to things like self confidence, self worth, dreams, desires, independence, education, profession, and outlook on life - then no - they should not be treated differently.

If your daughter wants to become a pilot, a veterinarian, a surgeon, a plumber, or a house wife with a gaggle of kids and a white picket fence, she should have your undying support and love.


Many women who thought that they were going to be housewives face a rude awakening when her husband leaves or other financial crisis requires her to have to find a job. These days everyone should have a marketable job skill and get some work experience before leaving the job market.
 
Not just breeding.... cooking, cleaning, keeping the house, raising the children, etc... What they are not of value for is their abilities in the workforce at large.
A disgusting attitude towards women I thought was just part of old guys' thinking when I was growing up. Sad to see that conservative reactionaries keep retreading bad ideas as long as possible!

You're more than welcome to move to some Socialist/Communist country like Cuba. I'm sure the swim to get there would get you in shape if you aren't already. The problem with our economic system is that people are not actually punished for their unwillingness to participate in it because those of your political ilk (like FDR) have provided them with a safety net to keep them from starving or freezing to death. Money isn't the value.... POWER is. It has been since the beginning of time and that hasn't been any different in any Socialist/Communist system that has ever existed either.
I live in Canada, and have vacationed in Cuba five times during my life...so, I can go to Cuba any time I feel like (and have free vacation weeks)...and we plan to go back again next year! That's the advantage of living in Canada, we're not trying to fight Castro and run a stupid embargo. Even with the embargo, and constant attempts at subversion by the CIA, Cubans still live a damn sight better than other Caribbean nations and most Latin Americans, with rare exceptions like Costa Rica. And, the average Cuban is much better off today than back when the Island was known as "The Whorehouse of America," when Cuba was owned by a sugar conglomerate and the Mafia. The goal of U.S. policymakers ever since the turn of the 20th century, was to turn every nation to their south into a vassal state for American economic and military interests. Cuba is the one that got away, and every Latin American nation that tries to go their own way instead of being saddled with IMF and World Bank debts and a puppet government, becomes a target (Venezuela). But, enough on that....off topic anyway!

Hold onto your pity for someone who gives a **** about it. We are very compatible. You'll have to talk to her about the children issue.
Not my question, but since it's in this post, would you want your daughter to marry a man like you? Many guys who have daughters all of a sudden find a new-found concern and respect for women after they have daughters of their own, and become concerned about their safety as they grow up, and what sort of quality of life they will have after they grow up.
 
We've had all the same conversations. While she isn't 100% in agreement with me on how to raise a child, we're at probably 92-93% agreement. Then again you need to remember that she's Puerto Rican, has never held a real job, and didn't graduate high school. Her only real marketable talents are in homemaking. Nothing else.

Mail order bride?
 
Many women who thought that they were going to be housewives face a rude awakening when her husband leaves or other financial crisis requires her to have to find a job. These days everyone should have a marketable job skill and get some work experience before leaving the job market.

I know it's contentious to even cite the writings of feminists here, but I'm reminded that one of the criticisms of Betty Friedan (The Feminine Mystique) that was made by black women and women living at or near poverty during the 60's and 70's, was that Friedan's lament about bored housewives was a luxury that many women did not have, and did not have historically before that golden age of the 1950's when the middle class expanded to encompass the majority of the population. The Feminine Mystique did not answer or address many of the concerns of those women, and that's why the feminist movement of the 60's was a collection of white female college graduates, who had no material concerns, and were fighting mostly against sexist rules and policies that barred them from many professions even after they had the credentials. Not that those weren't legitimate goals also, but the idea that every woman was a housewife before 2nd wave feminism, is another modern myth without much connection to what was happening in real life back then.
 
I find it quite hypocritical for liberals to complain about conservatives placing a value on money, when money is the primary tool that liberals use to affect their agenda upon society.
"Liberal"! Really! After all this, you think I'm a liberal? You need to find yourself an appropriate definition of liberalism then, because real liberals seek compromises and workaround strategies with the right...and that's not where I am coming from!
 
Guys, don't let Tigger get you down. He thrives on threads like this. Loves to stir up sand with his outrageous look on life. I don't feel sorry for his fiancé, because she allows him to treat her this way. :shrug:

I would feel sorry for his fiancee....if this story is true of course, because many women who are abused, expect to be abused.
 
And if your daughter says,

"Nope - I want to go to college, major in biology, then go to grad school and study genetic-engineering so that I can become a scientist and work on finding cures for childhood diseases."

What do you do then?

Call the Taliban and report her for possessing a belligerent attitude. Don't accuse her of being belligerent. That can be proven to be false. Accuse her of having a belligerent attitude. Attitudes are abstract and can never be proven one way or the other. The accuser has the advantage.
 
"Liberal"! Really! After all this, you think I'm a liberal? You need to find yourself an appropriate definition of liberalism then, because real liberals seek compromises and workaround strategies with the right...and that's not where I am coming from!

Liberals don't compromise.
 
I don't have daughters, but this question reminded me that one of reasons cited for the increase in eating disorders in teenage and even preteen girls is because they are being saddled with higher expectations than boys today in our culture.

Girls are expected to excel in school by their parents, to be beautiful - by the constant barrage of messaging they receive from advertising and pop media, to achieve in sports now, to be kind, well mannered by everyone.....is it any wonder why there are so many girls with bulimia and anorexia today?

In general, it has to be concluded that our society does a better job of raising women than men. Men are much more likely to commit suicide, become addicts, get into the criminal "justice' system, become violent and/or a victim of victim of violence, more likely to be injured or disabled and they die younger, often from preventable diseases/conditions.
 
As many of you already know, I have raised 5 daughters. So I have a little bit of experience.


I know I did something right because they are all happy, healthy, well-adjusted adults in their mid-20s now.


I taught them to be strong, both physically and mentally. I had a gym in the basement and started them all on strength training when they were about 7 or 8 and they started martial arts training around the same age.


From an early age I taught them to enjoy exercise rather than loathe it. Today, my 4th daughter is a high school biology teacher by day and a personal trainer and kickboxing instructor in the evening, on the weekends and in the summer. She is planning on opening a fitness center. I've no doubt that she will be successful in that endeavor. She was always the enterprising one.


I also taught them all about nutrition and taught them to ignore the misinformation regarding nutrition that their school and the government will spew at them.


I think that being very healthy, looking good and not being physically intimidated by males are key to a girl's self-confidence.


It also gave me confidence when they started dating. I wasn't afraid of them getting date raped because they could whoop ass. By the time they started dating they had several years of martial arts training.


I've always valued physical fitness and have instilled that value into their psyche.


I also taught my daughters that they deserve respect and if someone doesn't respect them then that person deserves no respect in return. Respect is a two way street.


I also taught them all to meditate in order to maintain peace of mind and improve their concentration.


I also believed in being a nonjudgmental parent. This made it easier for them to talk to me about anything. Kept an open line of communication.


And a tip for those of you with young daughters. The Girl Scouts organization is about more than selling cookies. I highly recommend it.
 
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