View Poll Results: Can a man be criminally/legally charged with raping his wife?

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  • Yes. Absolutely.

    60 68.18%
  • No. Definitely not.

    5 5.68%
  • Case-by-case basis. Not that black & white.

    21 23.86%
  • Other- please explain

    2 2.27%
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Thread: Spousal Rape - Crime of Rape, or Not ?????

  1. #171
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    Re: Spousal Rape - Crime of Rape, or Not ?????

    Quote Originally Posted by Gathomas88 View Post
    You kind of have to wonder if her fetish didn't really revolve around getting her lovers falsely accused of murder. Any guy unfortunate enough to have the gun in question go off during the act would be royally screwed.

    Good luck explaining an accident like that to the cops!
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  2. #172
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    Re: Spousal Rape - Crime of Rape, or Not ?????

    Quote Originally Posted by Mr.Nick View Post
    I suppose if its an actual physically violent rape -yes...

    But at the same time I have been with chicks (girlfriends) who didn't want to have sex for one reason or another but I kinda worked my way into it, and they were just trying to please me, so it was completely consensual..... That probably happens to a lot of couples anyways...

    But physically forcing a woman to have sex using brute force (even if it is your wife) is rape in my mind. If you physically have to force a woman to have sex it is certainly rape.
    Why does there have to be physical force? What if the wife is passed out drunk? What if the husband/wife is slipped a date rape drug? What if they are physically incapable of fighting back? What if the husband or wife controls the money and basically uses that control to get the sex? "If you want to sleep in the bed tonight, you have to have sex with me." Would that be merely abuse or abuse and rape? Afterall, if someone were using some other form of coercion, it can be considered rape. Basically, if it is rape between non-married people, it should also count as rape between married people. It wouldn't change the evidence or requirements to convict, "beyond a reasonable doubt", but it would allow for conviction when the evidence is there without having laws preventing that.
    "A woman is like a teabag, you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water." - Eleanor Roosevelt

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  3. #173
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    Re: Spousal Rape - Crime of Rape, or Not ?????

    Quote Originally Posted by Jerry View Post
    You linked to a story (which is where I got that video from). That's not evidence.

    Here's an example of evidence:
    STATE LAW CHART
    Marital / Spousal Rape Laws and Penalties | Criminal Law
    All of which are current laws, and the legislation dealt with past laws, that your site even confirms the ban on prosecution was repealed in 2003. That is proof that there was one. Your own posted site proves it. But the article is evidence that there was an issue up for debate in the general assembly of VA in 2002 dealing with spousal/marital rape and that this representative commented against change to the laws. If you have actual evidence to the contrary that this debate/issue came up as reported by the article, please present it. So far, you haven't provided such evidence. You have done nothing but show that currently those laws are different. Nothing more.
    "A woman is like a teabag, you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water." - Eleanor Roosevelt

    Keep your religion out of other people's marriages.

  4. #174
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    Re: Spousal Rape - Crime of Rape, or Not ?????

    Quote Originally Posted by roguenuke View Post
    Why does there have to be physical force? What if the wife is passed out drunk? What if the husband/wife is slipped a date rape drug? What if they are physically incapable of fighting back? What if the husband or wife controls the money and basically uses that control to get the sex? "If you want to sleep in the bed tonight, you have to have sex with me." Would that be merely abuse or abuse and rape? Afterall, if someone were using some other form of coercion, it can be considered rape. Basically, if it is rape between non-married people, it should also count as rape between married people. It wouldn't change the evidence or requirements to convict, "beyond a reasonable doubt", but it would allow for conviction when the evidence is there without having laws preventing that.

    Some of that would be hard to prove, some of it would be hard to prove wasn't consensual, in an atmosphere of assumption-to-consent.

    Coercion? As in, "Mow the grass or you don't get any this weekend?"

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    Re: Spousal Rape - Crime of Rape, or Not ?????

    If violence, threats or coercion are used it is rape no matter who the particpants are. Whether I would convict a husband if I was on jury would depend solely on the evidence and testimony, not on any notion that a husband can't rape a wife or that he is permitted to rape his wife.

  6. #176
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    Re: Spousal Rape - Crime of Rape, or Not ?????

    Quote Originally Posted by roguenuke View Post
    Then you are not looking well enough. There have been many posted in this very thread and in fact, there have been court cases that struck down some of those laws in various states. The link you posted is current laws, not past laws. But right from that site:
    Those exemptions regard, for example, when a man is legally married to someone below the age of consent. Normally this would be statutory rape, but their marriage protects him from that charge.

    The Senator opposed the law because he didn't see how it could be enforced. Neither do you. Neither do I. And that's my point. When there's no evidence of a rape, the wife shouldn't have a card to play to ruin her husband's reputation. The law should be struck down, but here's the thing...the law is not in jeopardy. There is no pending legal action taking place here. No pending legislation, no pending court opinion. Nothing.

    Add to that the fact that this is all 12 years old.

    This is why I have no reservation necro'ing a year-old thread, because here we have someone necro'ing a 12-year-old quote.

  7. #177
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    Re: Spousal Rape - Crime of Rape, or Not ?????

    Quote Originally Posted by clownboy View Post
    When sex is part of legal marital duty that means to get to spousal rape at least one of the spouses has already violated the contract, yes? Want to have sex only when YOU want to, don't get married.

    That said, if force is applied, again there are other charges available without the need for the whole rape question.
    I don't recall the part of the marriage vows or marriage laws that says that spouses must provide sexual services to each other at any time on demand. I hope that he men who think that will cooperate when their wife wants to do them with a strap-on during the superbowl.

  8. #178
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    Re: Spousal Rape - Crime of Rape, or Not ?????

    Quote Originally Posted by Hard Truth View Post
    I don't recall the part of the marriage vows or marriage laws that says that spouses must provide sexual services to each other at any time on demand. I hope that he men who think that will cooperate when their wife wants to do them with a strap-on during the superbowl.
    Generally speaking it's the "to have and to hold" part of the vow. Sex is what "have" means. They're old vows, not modern English. To lay with her, to have her, to take her, etc.

  9. #179
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    Re: Spousal Rape - Crime of Rape, or Not ?????

    Quote Originally Posted by Goshin View Post
    Some of that would be hard to prove, some of it would be hard to prove wasn't consensual, in an atmosphere of assumption-to-consent.

    Coercion? As in, "Mow the grass or you don't get any this weekend?"
    As in, the woman is already within a situation where she is being abused, doesn't work, doesn't own anything or have anything in her name, very little education, if any, and/or she is facing many other forms of abuse and she is basically being paid for sex by her husband with basic necessities. Anything that could be used to convince a jury that a rape victim was coerced when the accused isn't married to the accuser should also be applicable when it comes to the accused being married to the accuser.

    It doesn't matter how hard to prove it would be. It would honestly be just as hard to prove if it were date-rape. That doesn't mean the laws should not reflect the possibility of conviction should the evidence/proof be available. I've never argued that the evidence should be lessened for conviction, only that the laws should reflect a ability to press charges against a spouse in the case of rape, something that is unavailable when it comes to how the laws used to be, when exemptions were made for someone they are married to in rape laws.
    "A woman is like a teabag, you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water." - Eleanor Roosevelt

    Keep your religion out of other people's marriages.

  10. #180
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    Re: Spousal Rape - Crime of Rape, or Not ?????

    Quote Originally Posted by Jerry View Post
    Generally speaking it's the "to have and to hold" part of the vow. Sex is what "have" means. They're old vows, not modern English. To lay with her, to have her, to take her, etc.
    No one is required to make those vows. My vows did not include that. Plus, many may consider different meanings for those words. It would still be up to the couple, not you, nor society, nor old English meanings of words within generic vows as to what they are agreeing to as intimacy or affection within their marriage.
    "A woman is like a teabag, you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water." - Eleanor Roosevelt

    Keep your religion out of other people's marriages.

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