• This is a political forum that is non-biased/non-partisan and treats every person's position on topics equally. This debate forum is not aligned to any political party. In today's politics, many ideas are split between and even within all the political parties. Often we find ourselves agreeing on one platform but some topics break our mold. We are here to discuss them in a civil political debate. If this is your first visit to our political forums, be sure to check out the RULES. Registering for debate politics is necessary before posting. Register today to participate - it's free!

Parenting and the Internet

Thom Paine said:
I assume you're addressing me.

I have two boys, well, they're men now ages 27 and 23. What Maggie suggests can and should be done; I did that and more.
As an aside though, I am surprised and oft bothered by parents who cannot exercise influence and control over their children. Parenting is not an easy task but there are no options once children arrive. Parents Should never abdicate their responsibilities by giving a child unfettered freedom of action and choice.

I could ramble on but it might best be left for a different thread.

Again KUDOS TO MAGGIE for her awareness !!

Have a nice eve Wolfie

Thom Paine
Click to expand...

Thank you Thomas Paine..but actually what I was trying to point out..(ps..I like MaggieD) was that sometimes you are not aware what your kids are doing...so do you keep them in..or let em out??
 
Well hmmm, while complimenting maggie and responding to Wolfie I didn't answer the thread question...

I place 100% of the situation in the parental lap. ( the parents of the lost child mostly and parents of the others for similar reasons)

Thom Paine
 
SBu said:
So, you think that parents can't sit with their kids while using the internet? In other words, can't control kids' access to the internet?
Click to expand...

Eh - schools send up an 'internet use' agreement 'act' that you're supposed to review with your child, and sign. The kid, thereby, accepts responsibility for their online activity while on school grounds and promises not to go to sites they shouldn't visit, and do things they shouldn't do.

So, at school, I get the sense that they're unmonitored - because, though they're at school, the schools decided they don't care that much and brush off all responsibility.
 
SBu said:
So, you think that parents can't sit with their kids while using the internet? In other words, can't control kids' access to the internet?
Click to expand...

Do you not think that children should be allowed privacy??
 
Tucker Case said:
We won't ever be able to stop bullying of any sort. It needs to be addressed when it is encountered, but kids also need to be trained in how to deal with bullies. They need to learn techniques that can be used to remove the bullies power. For example, some kids can learn how to "own the joke". This works as well in person as it does online. someone seeks to belittle or degrade you, go along with it and exaggerate their claim to the point of absurdity. If a bully has no power to create teh illusion of superiorty, they will either give up trying or else they will expose themselves as insecure morons who don't know when they've become the joke.
Click to expand...
Or they'll just punch you in the face...
 
wolfie said:
Do you not think that children should be allowed privacy??
Click to expand...

The internet is NOT private. The internet is what I pay $49.95 (and climbing) to access via my computer which cost me $500.00.

Privacy belongs in their bedroom - where the internet and TV should NOT be allowed. And of course, when they're in the bathroom. When they're away from the home, they are not obtaining 'privacy' but 'solitude' - which I can step into any time I damned well please.

I didn't have the internet growing up, heck, we didn't even have a computer for a while - my kids won't wither away because they don't have facebook, ichat, and a pinterest account, or twitter or a cellphone that lets them send photos to friends. :roll: All this crap is not a NEED nor is it even a BENEFIT, honestly.

I see far more negative and problems - very few benefits. Actually, I see no benefits to social media for kids. They can keep up with friends at school, on the weekends, in the evenings, and on the phone (which I, also, pay for).
 
wolfie said:
Thank you Thomas Paine..but actually what I was trying to point out..(ps..I like MaggieD) was that sometimes you are not aware what your kids are doing...so do you keep them in..or let em out??
Click to expand...

Therein lies the rub, does it not?
( I think child rearing could have an interesting and lengthy thread of it's own )

Good eve, Wolfie

Thom Paine
 
wolfie said:
Nice sentiment MaggieD..but it don't work...If you don't have any kids..you have no idea!!
Click to expand...

It would work. No 14-year-old I'm supporting is going to control me. The internet, cell phones, access to a car to drive, computers . . . these are all rewards for good grades and good behavior. They are NOT entitlements. When parents give up THAT notion and think that, because everybody has them their kids have to have them? They're lost.

Now. If a parent doesn't want to listen to the flack? Or watch Ms Pouty Face slouch around the house. Slam her bedroom door. Then take the EZ way. Me? I don't THINK that would happen. My dogs are the best behaved on planet earth. Does THAT count?? :rofl

Do I sound a little like Tigger? ;)
 
wolfie said:
Do you not think that children should be allowed privacy??
Click to expand...

Not privacy left to their own devices online, no. Should they be allowed to stay in their room alone without internet access, sure.
 
Aunt Spiker said:
The internet is NOT private. The internet is what I pay $49.95 (and climbing) to access via my computer which cost me $500.00.

Privacy belongs in their bedroom - where the internet and TV should NOT be allowed. And of course, when they're in the bathroom. When they're away from the home, they are not obtaining 'privacy' but 'solitude' - which I can step into any time I damned well please.

I didn't have the internet growing up, heck, we didn't even have a computer for a while - my kids won't wither away because they don't have facebook, ichat, and a pinterest account, or twitter or a cellphone that lets them send photos to friends. :roll: All this crap is not a NEED nor is it even a BENEFIT, honestly.

I see far more negative and problems - very few benefits. Actually, I see no benefits.
Click to expand...

You have to move on Spiker..the world is a very different place now..
 
Aunt Spiker said:
Eh - schools send up an 'internet use' agreement 'act' that you're supposed to review with your child, and sign. The kid, thereby, accepts responsibility for their online activity while on school grounds and promises not to go to sites they shouldn't visit, and do things they shouldn't do.

So, at school, I get the sense that they're unmonitored - because, though they're at school, the schools decided they don't care that much and brush off all responsibility.
Click to expand...

When it comes to bullying, you can sell me on the idea that schools are unmonitored to a large extent, but when it comes to sites or things they shouldn't be looking at, I don't know. When I saw a student or two looking up inappropriate material by going around school settings via Google search, there was no way I would get away with letting that go on.
 
wolfie said:
You have to move on Spiker..the world is a very different place now..
Click to expand...

:slapme: Oh, Facebook is essential? :roll:

It's so essential kids use it to bully other kids, eh? :roll: What, the bully had privacy! So - bully on! We can't interfere with the activities of the bully because they are on the internet and entitled to privacy while doing whatever they want - all the while being 14 and crap.

No - I don't think so. Maybe you need to hop on the reality train and realize kids don't rule the world. They go to hell in a hand basket - it's because parents let them.
 
Fiddytree said:
When it comes to bullying, you can sell me on the idea that schools are unmonitored to a large extent, but when it comes to sites or things they shouldn't be looking at, I don't know. When I saw a student or two looking up inappropriate material by going around school settings via Google search, there was no way I would get away with letting that go on.
Click to expand...

Well - I just don't know how the school monitors. They say they 'keep an eye on them and this is just in case' - but I don't know, are they REALLY watching?

As of yet, I haven't heard anything that came from the schools failing to keep an eye on things, but they let so much slip through their fingers.
 
Aunt Spiker said:
Eh - schools send up an 'internet use' agreement 'act' that you're supposed to review with your child, and sign. The kid, thereby, accepts responsibility for their online activity while on school grounds and promises not to go to sites they shouldn't visit, and do things they shouldn't do.

So, at school, I get the sense that they're unmonitored - because, though they're at school, the schools decided they don't care that much and brush off all responsibility.
Click to expand...

If I wanted to be unrealistic and disingenuous I would say that you don't have to sign the internet use agreement. I suppose that would be to much though.

I also suppose that you are more or less right that school access is largely unmonitored. Internet was pretty new when I went through. I think you could access it at the school library if you really wanted to, but I'm sure today teachers have found a way to outsource personal contact in teaching to the internet.

But, again, that is at school. No reason you can't be king (or queen) of the castle at home.
 
wolfie said:
You have to move on Spiker..the world is a very different place now..
Click to expand...

With changes come reactions and restrictions. It is reasonable to want to be able to restrict your child's access to the internet without literally knowing every thought they have about cupcakes or Justin Bieber. The problem is doing it reasonably efficiently with the parent's time and technical understanding.
 
SBu said:
So, you think that parents can't sit with their kids while using the internet? In other words, can't control kids' access to the internet?
Click to expand...

Sure they can. Their access to the Internet sits on my desk. I can turn it off any time I want, I can log into the router and directly turn off just their access, limit how much time they can spend there, etc. I can even look at every website they visit and read ever single thing they write if I want to. I've got all the control, if I choose to exercise it. They have none.
 
Aunt Spiker said:
Well - I just don't know how the school monitors. They say they 'keep an eye on them and this is just in case' - but I don't know, are they REALLY watching?

As of yet, I haven't heard anything that came from the schools failing to keep an eye on things, but they let so much slip through their fingers.
Click to expand...

With online social networking, I think everyone is reacting to situations rather than being able to stop them. We're still adjusting to the internet, really. With Timmy finding boobs or death videos on the internet with ease and comfort around teachers, I think that is less likely. Well, that is, unless the inner cities are still that damn lax on their phone policies.
 
Aunt Spiker said:
Eh - schools send up an 'internet use' agreement 'act' that you're supposed to review with your child, and sign. The kid, thereby, accepts responsibility for their online activity while on school grounds and promises not to go to sites they shouldn't visit, and do things they shouldn't do.

So, at school, I get the sense that they're unmonitored - because, though they're at school, the schools decided they don't care that much and brush off all responsibility.
Click to expand...

Actually, the computers at my kids' school are strictly monitored and controlled, you can't go to a whole variety of websites and even trying will bring up red flags, since every student has to scan their ID card to use the computer.
 
SBu said:
Not privacy left to their own devices online, no. Should they be allowed to stay in their room alone without internet access, sure.
Click to expand...

The internet is the new way to speak to your friends/enemies..
And we can't change that....no amount of inhibition as far as computer liaisons will make any difference...
 
Aunt Spiker said:
Well good for you guys - sometimes violence doesn't stop it for other children. :roll:
Click to expand...

The problem is, we're raising a generation of kids who are wimps. They have no idea how to stand up for themselves, how to deal with bullies, they never learn how to take care of their own problems. We deal with the symptoms, we don't deal with the problems. That's why these kids grow up and then have no clue how to live in the real world, because they've been sheltered from anything negative their entire lives.
 
Cephus said:
The problem is, we're raising a generation of kids who are wimps. They have no idea how to stand up for themselves, how to deal with bullies, they never learn how to take care of their own problems. We deal with the symptoms, we don't deal with the problems. That's why these kids grow up and then have no clue how to live in the real world, because they've been sheltered from anything negative their entire lives.
Click to expand...

You know that many of us incredibly disagree with you on this one. We don't feel it wise to continue to blame the victim for experiences that largely would not be tolerated anywhere else.
 
Fiddytree said:
You know that many of us incredibly disagree with you on this one. We don't feel it wise to continue to blame the victim for experiences that largely would not be tolerated anywhere else.
Click to expand...

I'm not blaming the victim, I'm saying that lots of kids are out offing themselves because they've never been taught how to handle problems. Yeah, you stop the bullies if you can, especially anyone who is guilty of physical assault, there are already laws against that, but when it's people making fun of you? Man up, grow a pair and deal with it.

Suicide in most of these cases is the way out of the coward.
 
Aunt Spiker said:
:slapme: Oh, Facebook is essential? :roll:

It's so essential kids use it to bully other kids, eh? :roll: What, the bully had privacy! So - bully on! We can't interfere with the activities of the bully because they are on the internet and entitled to privacy while doing whatever they want - all the while being 14 and crap.

No - I don't think so. Maybe you need to hop on the reality train and realize kids don't rule the world. They go to hell in a hand basket - it's because parents let them.
Click to expand...

Do you think that bullying only goes on in facebook...Do you accompany your kids to school and sit with them to make sure no-one calls them nasty names??
 
Fiddytree said:
With changes come reactions and restrictions. It is reasonable to want to be able to restrict your child's access to the internet without literally knowing every thought they have about cupcakes or Justin Bieber. The problem is doing it reasonably efficiently with the parent's time and technical understanding.
Click to expand...

So how do you draw the line??
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom