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Thread: Parenting and the Internet

  1. #51
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    Re: Parenting and the Internet

    Quote Originally Posted by Fiddytree View Post
    You know that many of us incredibly disagree with you on this one. We don't feel it wise to continue to blame the victim for experiences that largely would not be tolerated anywhere else.
    I can only speak for myself here; I don't fault the victim at all. I do lay the responsibility for both the victim and the 'bullys' in the parent's lap.

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    Parenting and the Internet

    Quote Originally Posted by Cephus View Post
    I'm not blaming the victim, I'm saying that lots of kids are out offing themselves because they've never been taught how to handle problems. Yeah, you stop the bullies if you can, especially anyone who is guilty of physical assault, there are already laws against that, but when it's people making fun of you? Man up, grow a pair and deal with it.

    Suicide in most of these cases is the way out of the coward.
    In many cases standing up to bullies, with words or fists, does nothing. It shouldn't be the place of the student to defend themselves because someone wants to harass you. That's the school's job in providing a safe environment.
    Michael J Petrilli-"Is School Choice Enough?"-A response to the recent timidity of American conservatives toward education reform. https://nationalaffairs.com/publicat...-choice-enough

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    Re: Parenting and the Internet

    Quote Originally Posted by Fiddytree View Post
    In many cases standing up to bullies, with words or fists, does nothing. It shouldn't be the place of the student to defend themselves because someone wants to harass you. That's the school's job in providing a safe environment.
    The school doesn't exist everywhere on the planet. While you're actually in school, I agree, at least as far as it can reasonably be done. But what about after school? What about before school? What about on a street corner somewhere. That's not the school's job.
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  4. #54
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    Re: Parenting and the Internet

    Quote Originally Posted by Fiddytree View Post
    You know that many of us incredibly disagree with you on this one. We don't feel it wise to continue to blame the victim for experiences that largely would not be tolerated anywhere else.
    It is bad parenting. The bully bad parenting is obvious. The parents of the kids who kill themselves have culpability too.

  5. #55
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    Re: Parenting and the Internet

    Quote Originally Posted by Cephus View Post
    I'm not blaming the victim, I'm saying that lots of kids are out offing themselves because they've never been taught how to handle problems. Yeah, you stop the bullies if you can, especially anyone who is guilty of physical assault, there are already laws against that, but when it's people making fun of you? Man up, grow a pair and deal with it.

    Suicide in most of these cases is the way out of the coward.
    Well, we're talking about kids here. They are in the process of learning how to handle problems. You and I have gone through the process and understand the techniques involved in dealing with these situations. But a kid experiencing online bullying on a daily basis does not. You can argue, why don't they just ignore these things and not indulge their bullies, however, for the same reasons we look at responses to our arguments on DP, these kids are drawn in by their curiosity to constantly keep abreast of their social status or lack thereof. The difference is that we know how to handle it, they are just learning. We don't expect kids to abide by the sink or swim mantra until 18 for the most part, why should we subject them to that online at home?

  6. #56
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    Re: Parenting and the Internet

    Quote Originally Posted by Cephus View Post
    The problem is, we're raising a generation of kids who are wimps. They have no idea how to stand up for themselves, how to deal with bullies, they never learn how to take care of their own problems. We deal with the symptoms, we don't deal with the problems. That's why these kids grow up and then have no clue how to live in the real world, because they've been sheltered from anything negative their entire lives.
    When I was a kid, bullies existed. I know, I know that was before people made up there is a god. But, generally bullies picked a few victims and focused on them...beat the hell out of them...or took their money, or just mentally terrorized them.

    But bullying today...is different. They do it is a very public way via cell phones and Internet...and usually "broadcasting" their terroristic behaviors to a whole school of kids. And then a lot of kids, without really malice, join in by ridiculing or making fun of a specific kid. It's really mostly mental abuse or acts of psychological terrorism...which to a lot of kids is worse than an asswhipping. And sometimes kids don't even know who these "electronic bullies" are...sometimes they do.

    When you think of all of the ways that one could use Internet and cell phones to engage in acts of mental abuse or acts of psychological terrorism...well, kids are damn clever with computers and cell phones. Kids grow up with the technologies.

    So really bullying today has become "high tech"...you might say.

    Anyway...just saying that bullying is a different game today...than years past. Really, when I think about it...I'd rather have my ass kicked than the ways kids bully today. In my day...even if I was afraid of somebody...I'd eventually fight back...but...that's not usually possible for a lot of kids today. The bullies today start a pretty vicious chain reacting form of bullying.

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    Re: Parenting and the Internet

    Quote Originally Posted by SBu View Post
    Another child commits suicide due to online bullying: Answers - and justice - remain elusive in 'bullied' Connecticut student's suicide | Fox News

    What are your thoughts about parenting and the internet?

    Are these parents to blame for recklessly exposing an adolescent to constant internet access? Is it ok for parents to allow their children essentially unfettered access to the internet? In the words of the child's parents:

    "I would look at his computer sometimes because he left it unlocked sometimes and to check on him I would read his email. He was talking about happy things. It seemed like he had friends to talk to. I didn't think I needed to look further."


    Sorry, no poll. Clicked submit before setting up the poll.
    I don't blame them for giving the kids access to the internet, I blame them for not raising their kids well enough and supporting them so that they wouldn't consider suicide.
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    Parenting and the Internet

    Quote Originally Posted by Removable Mind View Post
    When I was a kid, bullies existed. I know, I know that was before people made up there is a god. But, generally bullies picked a few victims and focused on them...beat the hell out of them...or took their money, or just mentally terrorized them.

    But bullying today...is different. They do it is a very public way via cell phones and Internet...and usually "broadcasting" their terroristic behaviors to a whole school of kids. And then a lot of kids, without really malice, join in by ridiculing or making fun of a specific kid. It's really mostly mental abuse or acts of psychological terrorism...which to a lot of kids is worse than an asswhipping. And sometimes kids don't even know who these "electronic bullies" are...sometimes they do.

    When you think of all of the ways that one could use Internet and cell phones to engage in acts of mental abuse or acts of psychological terrorism...well, kids are damn clever with computers and cell phones. Kids grow up with the technologies.

    So really bullying today has become "high tech"...you might say.

    Anyway...just saying that bullying is a different game today...than years past. Really, when I think about it...I'd rather have my ass kicked than the ways kids bully today. In my day...even if I was afraid of somebody...I'd eventually fight back...but...that's not usually possible for a lot of kids today. The bullies today start a pretty vicious chain reacting form of bullying.
    That's part of it, but genuinely we are reacting to a deep-seated societal problem. Many of us were harassed every day, all day, and felt isolated from the whole school, without cell phones, without online bullying. Cephus's argument is that they should stand up to it and if it doesn't work, tough crap. He thinks its some coming of age rite, and it's not. It is a senseless act sanctioned by society, fit with all of the sadistic social darwinistic tendencies.
    Michael J Petrilli-"Is School Choice Enough?"-A response to the recent timidity of American conservatives toward education reform. https://nationalaffairs.com/publicat...-choice-enough

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    Re: Parenting and the Internet

    Quote Originally Posted by Fiddytree View Post
    That's part of it, but genuinely we are reacting to a deep-seated societal problem. Many of us were harassed every day, all day, and felt isolated from the whole school, without cell phones, without online bullying. Cephus's argument is that they should stand up to it and if it doesn't work, tough crap. He thinks its some coming of age rite, and it's not. It is a senseless act sanctioned by society, fit with all of the sadistic social darwinistic tendencies.
    I didn't say tough crap, but we're teaching kids that not only is standing up against the bullying not an option, often they get penalized for having the balls to do it. When you take away the tools to deal with problems, what do you expect?
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    Parenting and the Internet

    Quote Originally Posted by Fisher View Post
    It is bad parenting. The bully bad parenting is obvious. The parents of the kids who kill themselves have culpability too.
    And when schools continually allow such an environment to foster because they see it as relatively harmless, what then?
    Michael J Petrilli-"Is School Choice Enough?"-A response to the recent timidity of American conservatives toward education reform. https://nationalaffairs.com/publicat...-choice-enough

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